POZ Community Forums
Off Topic Forums => Off Topic Forum => Topic started by: jessem3s on August 20, 2007, 08:00:11 pm
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Now you can take a look at the new issue of POZ MAGAZINE.
;D
Enjoy ;D :P ;D
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Why are you in it?
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;D
Someone on here spread the beans after I told them about it in confidentiality.
I guess you can't trust anyone on here!
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So why are you in it?
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How about you read it...
;D
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Not sure I want to... ;D
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To each their own.
Don't read it. ;D
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I will, when I get my copy in the mail...is that you on the cover? Are you a cover girl now?? Oh lord, as if her ego wasn't big enough... ;)
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LOL hey hey hey!!! ;D
Read it!
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I'll wait for the October issue, myself... ;) I think we've had a bit of an "overkill" here in the threads lately.
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If there is nothing nice to say than say nothing at all... ;D
I love my cover! Super rocking!
I love Regan & Sally & everyone at POZ!!!!!! ;D ;D ;D
They rocked it totally!!!
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Trust me, that was nowhere near "not nice." Now calm down, Superstar :P
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It wont go to my head.. Thats what its all about breaking the stereotypes!!! ;)
Read the article!
HIV is not a black, gay, or druggies disease!
Anyone can have it! All walks of life!!!
I am so happy that I can show that, and that's all I want to do!!! ;D
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I read the entire thing, sweetie......Congrats on your debut?
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I read the entire thing, sweetie......Congrats on your debut?
THANKS ALOT!!!!
It means alot ;)
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WOW first week here on the forums and already has won his way over on POZ Magizine.
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The magazine thing has been in production since April... So it wasn't an overnight thing.... :)
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Coño !
what's next, Deco Drive?
Rich
(who grew up on the beach)
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That is the plan!!! ;D
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It wont go to my head.. Thats what its all about breaking the stereotypes!!! ;)
Yeah...that's why you posted this thread and changed your avatar ::)
In a similar vein, did anyone see the new issue of handballled bears?!? I'm on the cover
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There is more to it than the cover...
I bet if you had it you would do it too, and don't pretend like you wouldn't!
But anyways.... Productive/positive messages appreciated all others not. ;D
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There is more to it than the cover...
I bet if you had it you would do it too, and don't pretend like you wouldn't!
But anyways.... Productive/positive messages appreciated all others not. ;D
Oh lamb - if you are gonna scream for attention you must learn to accept a few laughs at your expense too.
Did I ever tell you about the time I tried to use glow in the dark paint in the Rambles....I got laughed at by the boys and attacked by the mosquitoes! But am I bitter?!? >:(
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Im not bitter!! ;D ;D ;D
We can hold hands, and run in the rolling hill sides of gay land... :-*
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Jess,
Sweetpea, when you put yourself out there you have to expect certain amount of flak. Rather than get all wounded, wear it as a badge of honour.
I personally think Poz magazine is a low rent rag which is the HIV equivalent of the National Enquirer, but part of me still admires you for what you've done in sharing you story. What's more, if it helps the poz cause even just a little then it is something you can be proud of.
MtD
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congrats budddy.....
so where is my cover story about being a big fat bear in NYC and being POZ???? where??? Where ????
Pete
(begging because he needs new mancunt pictures)
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Pete,
that issue will follow the one about 50-ish shrunken, lipoatropied, big-bellied disability queens....(read: It ain't happenin')
Jess, congratulations sweetie.
hugs,
Alan
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Congrats on the cover deal, Lil Pup. You gotten your few minutes of fame but am curious to know what one has to do to get on the cover? Not trying to but am just saying. Your story is kinda different but kinda the same, just that it seems you grew up with money. Not hating but just saying, you almost make me feel like you are happy about getting infected. And would like to see someone on the cover who I can relate to...No offense.
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I don't think you can blame the puppy for the cover. There are very few covers (check the archives http://www.poz.com/archive/archive.shtml) where people will relate. Reminds me of the gay pride thread:
"[pride is the same] meaning behind the phrase "positive and proud". It alludes to not living in shame and not allowing others to treat us shamefully."
"Point is: showing off the way you want to is called our freedom. If your not able to understand that gays and lesbians come in all sizes shapes and colors.....as well as ways of dressing and sexual proclivities....then ok. But to say..."oh those freaky people are giving gays a bad name" is to show your prejudice and possibly your hypocracy....For insatnace: its ok for staight people to have their freaky dressy parades.... Mardi Gras and here we have the Mummers Parade where straight men wear dresses and wigs and march up Broad Steet on New Years Day. Oh thats ok ...it doesnt reflect badly on straights. But put a guy in chaps with his ass hanging out and some others in drag and we have something shameful????Please If gay pride is all about looking just like the Cleavers.....Hey Beaver... then I dont think I am so proud of my fellow gayus anymore.
That Jesse is an openly feminine gay 19yo (not flaming, he says, I may disagree with that) should be taken as pride. That he only freaked out for a week and goes on with his life is laudable. I hope that will we all be here when he suddenly has a panic attack or just feels low and reaches aidmeds.com for comfort.
Milker.
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Congrats on the cover and the article buddy~ ;D
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I think that everyone can take the story in the way they wish.
At the young age of 19 I have accomplished much!
Had a career underway(media), went to school(still do), kept up a social life(still have), and still impacted my friends in a positive way(always will).
I have always has boy trouble because of "me" but one day I do hope to find someone who loves me for me, and not get dumped because I don't look "latino" enough, or for the superficial things people want to look at.
There is more to Jesse than meets Jesse. ;)
I think if you get to know me you will realize that I am a really kind person, and absolutely sweet, grounded, and earthy. I may seem otherwise but the truth is that I am all about putting others ahead of me.
To answer the question about the story being the same but not the same... Hmm.. my family is middle class America so nope... Not rich.
I am just a suburb boy from Miami with high dreams, and hope and I pushed my way to make it to where I am.
I WANNA THANK EVERYONE WHO SEES THE POINT OF THE STORY AND APPRECIATE WHAT I and THOSE AT POZ ARE TRYING TO DO.
-One day the stigma of this disease will fade because all of us have given it a face-
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I'm glad this is stored forever. You will laugh at what you said in a couple of years.
It's great that you're so upbeat.
Ahh Youth...
Milker.
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;D
Someone on here spread the beans after I told them about it in confidentiality.
I guess you can't trust anyone on here!
I guess I should withold judgement until I read the article, but I won't. The first thing I want to know is why in the world would anyone would consider it an accomplishment to end up on the cover of a magazine because they became HIV positive? Your job, going to school, those are the type of things that I could agree with you as being an accomplishment, course folks much less fortunate than you do that every day of the week, without seeking applause or attention.
As I said I haven't read the article and the above is just a preliminary thought. I'm sure after reading the article there will be much more discuss.
Oh by the way Jesus, you PM'd three people that I know of bragging about the upcoming article.
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I think if you get to know me you will realize that I am a really kind person, and absolutely sweet, grounded, and earthy.
Wait -- you forgot "humble". ;) :P
Congrats on your cover -- I look forward to reading the article when my magazine arrives.
Hugs,
Mike
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Jesse, that was a nice article & I am proud of you for doing it.
:-*
Dan
(Who was in the Dec 05 issue)
http://www.poz.com/articles/406_2384.shtml
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I just read it. Nice article. Congrats.
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I cant wait for mine to come in the mail! Congrats on the cover...that is pretty cool!!!
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Jesse,
It's never easy to come out publicly as being HIV+, so in that regard, congratulations to you.
I'm also glad that your life appears to be going so well, despite being HIV+. That's not the case for many folks with HIV, which I am sure you know. I think we all need to be sensitive to that, especially when portraying how bright and promising life appears to be, like your article does. So you shouldn't be surprised when some people challenge you, because their lives (myself included) look nothing like yours.
The subtext I infer from the article is that: "having HIV is no big deal -- you can still be beautiful and have a fabulous life." No, the article doesn't say that. But that's the underlying message I get from it. There's no mention of any health concerns about being positive. I think all positive folks should realize that none of us know exactly what the future holds for us with respect to HIV. In that respect, I applaud you for stating that you must live with the consequences of getting HIV. How about expounding on what those consequences are for you?
To me, all of this calls for at least a modicum of humility in a public forum like Poz Magazine, which I find lacking in the article. Yet statements like "Jesse Sanchez has been given a hard time—on the street, at school—for being gay and so absolutely beautiful" and "... the adoration of his friends kicked up to a whole new level when they saw how he handled his diagnosis" and "he’s been loved to the extreme as well" don't demonstrate even a hint of humility.
Honestly, I have always been suspicious of folks who seek applause and attention, as it makes me (and many others) suspect self-promotion and selfishness. I'm not saying that is the case with you. But I am more impressed with what people do, not how they look or what they wear. I wouldn't know Dolce and Gabba shades, from Foster Grants.
I look forward to is a follow-up article on your upcoming work as an HIV spokesman. It strikes me that this article is somewhat premature, as what I'd really like to read about is what you have done and accomplished as an HIV educator.
Best of luck to you.
Regards,
Henry
P.S. My sister is a psychology professor as Miami Dade -- North Miami campus, I believe (though she worked at Wolfson campus for a number of years).
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I think that everyone can take the story in the way they wish.
I think that if you see an 18 year old getting hired by a Fox News Station on a regular basis then you have nothing to be impressed about.
At the young age of 19 I have accomplished much!
Had a career underway, went to school, kept up a social life, and still impacted my friends in a positive way.
I have always has boy trouble because of "me" but one day I do hope to find someone who loves me for me, and not get dumped because I don't look "latino" enough, or for the superficial things people want to look at.
There is more to Jesse than meets Jesse. ;)
I think if you get to know me you will realize that I am a really kind person, and absolutely sweet, grounded, and earthy. I may seem otherwise but the truth is that I am all about putting others ahead of me.
To answer the question about the story being the same but not the same... Hmm.. my family is middle class America so nope... Not rich.
I am just a suburb boy from Miami with high dreams, and hope and I pushed my way to make it to where I am.
I WANNA THANK EVERYONE WHO SEES THE POINT OF THE STORY AND APPRECIATE WHAT I and THOSE AT POZ ARE TRYING TO DO.
-One day the stigma of this disease will fade because all of us have given it a face-
Jesse, Jesse, Jesse....
I am all in favor and support anyone who is so out about their sexuality and their HIV status. I also believe that the more people are out, the better things will become for everyone.
Now, you must remember that we all have different realities. Our experiences and lives with HIV are unique to each of us.
I have to tell you that I admire your "in your face" attitude about being a young gay positive man. I wish I had the balls to be that comfortable with myself at the age of 19...but that is an entire different story.
I also have to say that I had to make an effort to read the entire article without having any judgmental thoughts, and I hate to be judgemental.
You are young and a recent seroconversion. You are also very fortunate to have such a support systems (emotional and financial).
You see, many people in here are truly the REAL SURVIVORS, the real HEROS. These are the ones who were infected before any drugs were in the market, before we knew how HIV was transmitted, before we even knew what it was. Some faced discrimination beyond your imagination because of this. people wouldn't even sit on the same chair as someone who was thought to have AIDS had sat before, much less treat any PWA with the least amount of dignity.
Some don't have the support of their family, some don't have the financial support to make living with HIV a little easier, some only have this place for the support, which is so important.
So when I read things like "Not to mention the new car she gets him every year" ....no that is NOT your typical American middle class family lifestyle.
One thing that I notice is who you have to emphasize on your accomplishments by the age of 19. Take it easy, you don't have to prove anything to us in here. A little humility will go a long way. I am happy for you, and you should be proud of you have accomplished in life so far, but don't think you are the only one here who is/was goal oriented and has accomplished things you can be proud of. We all have a story too, remember that.
You like attention, so what? There is nothing wrong with that, go for it if that is what you want. Hey, you are young and pretty and if people are willing to give you the attention you seek, more power to you.
Last but not least on my list of comments....when I read the following from you "“I only date men who are over 30,” he says. “Usually they’re career-oriented, successful”—a power dynamic that can put the eager-to-please teen at a disadvantage when the other man wants to skip the condom."....come on Jesse, really?!?!?!?!
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Conrgratulations on the article. Lets no forget we're all at different points on our own personal HIV road, and no experience is more or less valid than the next.
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The more I'm reading the more I'm believing that the POZ editorial staff has their heads up their butts on this one to be honest.
Jesse is a young guy who is acting perfectly normal for someone his age...I really would like to know what was the thinking of POZ staff to use him though for a cover story in this fashion?
I really think they should have been more discretion and better judgement on their side to be frank.
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I want to thank everyone who is supportive and sees the purpose of what I did.
Bringing attention for a cause. ;D
Thanks a million !
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The more I'm reading the more I'm believing that the POZ editorial staff has their heads up their butts on this one to be honest.
Jesse is a young guy who is acting perfectly normal for someone his age...I really would like to know what was the thinking of POZ staff to use him though for a cover story in this fashion?
I really think they should have been more discretion and better judgement on their side to be frank.
It looks like the door has been open and I feel comfortable in expressing my critique of Ms. Chew's article. In fact I was so concerned that it not be perceived that I was attacking the subject of the article that I actually PM'd Peter Staley asking his permission to start a thread on this article. Peter responded that Poz Magazine and AidsMeds are more than willing to accept criticism no matter how harsh. So here goes.
First and foremost I want to say my critique is of the article, it's purpose, and more troubling to me, the poor journalistic quality. I want to make it clear that in no way is this a critique of Jessie.
I've read the article several times and for the life of me I can't figure out what point Ms. Chew is trying to make, what demographic she is trying to reach, or what purpose the article serves at all. To me it starts with the title and cover,"The Second Coming of Jesus," complete with halo, c'mon Ms. Chew could you be just a little more obvious? In fact after reading the title I kept waiting for more irony to unfold withen the article, but much to my chagrin it never happened.
In fact I'm so confused by the purpose of her article that I am going to stop here and invite Ms Chew to explain exactly what she was trying to achieve. Help me understand Ms Chew. Because as of now I could have saved you the time and trouble of writing this fluff piece by supplying you a direct link to Jesus' Myspace page and cutting out the middle man.
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I found it to be a well written article and I hope you find yourself back behind the news desk someday.
Jeff
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To me it starts with the title and cover,"The Second Coming of Jesus," complete with halo, c'mon Ms. Chew could you be just a little more obvious? In fact after reading the title I kept waiting for more irony to unfold withen the article, but much to my chagrin it never happened.
Just to clarify - usually the author isn't in control of the title of the article or the cover of the magazine (even if it is about their article)
This is why I blame all of the Poz editorial staff and am a little dumbfounded as it seems to have been a group effort.
I also reiterate that my issue isn't Jesse, but the lack of editorial direction of the article that sort of leaves an ambiguous impression of the subject that really was unnecessary.
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;D
Someone on here spread the beans after I told them about it in confidentiality.
I guess you can't trust anyone on here!
If this is some sarcastic, off-handed swipe at me I don't appreciate it and will not be represented in a false light.
Jesse and I had a phone conversation last Friday night in which he told me about the cover article, as well as his having been given an official POZ blog. He asked me specifically not to say anything, and I did not.
As regards the article: it's not really that surprising. POZ mag seems to have a specific policy of insisting that being HIV+ and conforming to the cosmetic industry's standards of "pretty" are not conflicting concepts. I'm all for diversity, gawd knows, but to disavow the "50-ish shrunken, lipoatropied, big-bellied disability queens" in favor of 19-year-old self-obsessed boys and Manhattan socialite bottle-blondes is disingenuous, to say the least.
"The second coming of Jesus"? When, precisely was the first time, baby? And how, precisely are you breaking stereotypes with this statement:
It wont go to my head.. Thats what its all about breaking the stereotypes!!! Wink
Read the article!
HIV is not a black, gay, or druggies disease!
Anyone can have it! All walks of life!!!
I am so happy that I can show that, and that's all I want to do!!! Grin
And the expression is "spilling" beans.
Brent
(Who puked a little in his mouth reading this thread)
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For those of you who want to read the topic of this thread here it is: http://www.poz.com/articles/jesus_sanchez_miami_2046_12769.shtml (http://www.poz.com/articles/jesus_sanchez_miami_2046_12769.shtml)
I didn't find anything controversial about the article. Personally I found it interesting in how Jesse's way of dealing with HIV was to spin it into self-promotion. It's not the way I dealt with it but I wasn't weaned on reality television and MySpace. As far as the article's style and subject matter, I took it to mirror that of the person she was interviewing: He perceives himself as a celebrity so that is how she interviewed him.
Are there more important stories that need to be told? Of course. I'm glad I got to hear Jesse's though.
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Jesse and I had a phone conversation last Friday night in which he told me about the cover article, as well as his having been given an official POZ blog. Brent
Just and FYI... I am unaware of Jesse being offered a blog on AIDSmeds or POZ, and my approval would be required for this.
Peter
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Just and FYI... I am unaware of Jesse being offered a blog on AIDSmeds or POZ, and my approval would be required for this.
Peter
Well Peter, since we're "spreading beans", that's just what he told me. Without getting too deeply into the conversation, he perceived my lack of enthusiasm at the prospect as some kind of jealousy, saying that I should ask for an AIDSmeds blog of my own. I explained that Matty and I founded The Spin Cycle and find our appropriate readership there.
Thanks for the response-
Brent
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As far as the article's style and subject matter, I took it to mirror that of the person she was interviewing: He perceives himself as a celebrity so that is how she interviewed him.
Ford,
I agree 100% and I thank you for saying that as it put into words what I couldn't exactly put my finger on with what was bothering me about the tone.
It reads like he wrote it himself and I realize that you are right about the angle, and that is exactly where I find fault with the poz editorial staff - I'm not certain this was really the right thing for POZ to do in how they depict a 19year old newly poz person in a national magazine.
If this was Britney doing the National Enquirer I would laugh and say she should know better and deserves it - but this is (no matter how savvy he thinks he is) just a 19 year old that agreed to a profile through what is supposed to be a serious publication for poz people.
My gut is that they thought he was fabulous and if he wanted to protray himself that way then who are they to argue, and though I get that rationale, I sort of question it in regards to the subject matter, placement and readership.
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POZ mag seems to have a specific policy of insisting that being HIV+ and conforming to the cosmetic industry's standards of "pretty" are not conflicting concepts. I'm all for diversity, gawd knows, but to disavow the "50-ish shrunken, lipoatropied, big-bellied disability queens" in favor of 19-year-old self-obsessed boys and Manhattan socialite bottle-blondes is disingenuous, to say the least.
couldnt agree more
im increasingly concerned about the whole 'hiv lite' (as moffie would put it) thing and although i dont want people to think im about to drop down dead im tired of hearing the 'its no big deal' health line.
im sorry jesse but while i will never disrespect anyone for stepping up to the plate and trying to challenge prejudice im most uncomfortable with this whole thing (especially as it reads like a jesse-promo). while i respect the fact that you are embracing your new situation and not letting it destroy you, please dont seem quite so thrilled about it.
apologies to anyone ive offended by these comments, and especially to jesse if you feel you have been misrepresented, but as i said previously, im feeling very uncomfortable about this.
and whilst i agree that we're all at different points on our own personal HIV road, and no experience is more or less valid than the next.
i also agree entirely with iggy's misgivings
best wishes to all,
xxx
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If this is some sarcastic, off-handed swipe at me I don't appreciate it and will not be represented in a false light.
Jesse and I had a phone conversation last Friday night in which he told me about the cover article, as well as his having been given an official POZ blog. He asked me specifically not to say anything, and I did not.
As regards the article: it's not really that surprising. POZ mag seems to have a specific policy of insisting that being HIV+ and conforming to the cosmetic industry's standards of "pretty" are not conflicting concepts. I'm all for diversity, gawd knows, but to disavow the "50-ish shrunken, lipoatropied, big-bellied disability queens" in favor of 19-year-old self-obsessed boys and Manhattan socialite bottle-blondes is disingenuous, to say the least.
"The second coming of Jesus"? When, precisely was the first time, baby? And how, precisely are you breaking stereotypes with this statement:
And the expression is "spilling" beans.
Brent
(Who puked a little in his mouth reading this thread)
To clarify the conversation. We spoke about the BLOG being in the question since it was brought up. I didn't confirm it and I said, "It's not a for sure."
Also since we were talking about blogs you seemed a bit troubled in the conversation, and you seemed to be very interested in the blog thing. I clearly told you that
I would do it was offered. Yes, the idea was briefly touched, but nothing set instone. This is ridiculous lol... So much chaos from a bean.
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Maybe Ms Chew was dazzled by the sparkle, but I find it troubling that she seems to scapegoat others for Jesus infection. A casual, "Jesus doesn't understand the dynamic," so it really is somone elses fault that he became infected.
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Pete,
that issue will follow the one about 50-ish shrunken, lipoatropied, big-bellied disability queens....(read: It ain't happenin')
Don't forget the PML poster boys. ;)
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Everybody should have their 15 minutes of fame, so why not a freshly diagnosed 19 y/o with his head full of ideas, hopes and teenie thoughts? I read the article, but personally, I didn't find it particularly interesting. Not much I could relate to, not much about activism, just promises, a bit too much of a shiny home-story promo thing for my taste. Perhaps it's a generation thing? I hope they're doing a follow up in 10 years time, so we can see how you developed, that'd be interesting.
But congrats jesse, anyways! It's a very courageous move to come forward and present yourself to the public this way. It surely gives your ego a nice boost and I hope you'll stay healthy enough to follow your dreams! Oh, and I loved the impression of you walking on the water, that's funny!
While at it, I can strongly recommend the article about homophobia and AIDS in Jamaica, in the same POZ issue. It's very well written and reflects a lot of experiences I made myself while I was there. It points out the terrible situation where gay activists are regularly getting killed for their coming out and fighting injustice. Personally, this would have been a cover story I could more relate to, because it shows true fighters, but of course, tastes are different.
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Let us also not forget just how far humility goes...I can remember being a fresh faced, 19 year old...I was on a hugely popular NBC saturday morning TV show...and it wasn't until I lost many friends...no not because I was on TV...it was because I was complete and utter ASS!
There is nothing wrong with with following dreams and doing what it is we set out to do...but there is a problem with a holier than thou attitude it leaves you friendless and alone...
And the other thing is...as fast you rise to your 15 minutes...it only takes a minute to fall...
Just sain...
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I don't think POZ has anything to do with fame.
My friends would never leave my side and nor would I.
They love me much and I care for them very much.
I am very happy to say my friends are amazing girls with great hearts. :-*
They mean the world to me and they have been great supporters from the start.
I love the chicas! ;D
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Let us also not forget just how far humility goes...I can remember being a fresh faced, 19 year old...I was on a hugely popular NBC saturday morning TV show...and it wasn't until I lost many friends...no not because I was on TV...it was because I was complete and utter ASS!
So that's why you're so comfortable in front of the camera!
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So that's why you're so comfortable in front of the camera!
You found me out! ;D
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To clarify the conversation. We spoke about the BLOG being in the question since it was brought up. I didn't confirm it and I said, "It's not a for sure."
Also since we were talking about blogs you seemed a bit troubled in the conversation, and you seemed to be very interested in the blog thing. I clearly told you that
I would do it was offered. Yes, the idea was briefly touched, but nothing set instone. This is ridiculous lol... So much chaos from a bean.
I stand by my description of our conversation, Jessie. Backtrack if you like, it's your prerogative to cover your ass, even at the expense of accuracy.
You didn't address the quote I made regarding AIDS being a disease of "blacks, gays and druggies". Obviously you're not African American, and although I'd wager that you've partied now and then, I wouldn't label you a "druggie". But buttercup, you're as gay as a pink, fur-lined and bedazzled parasol. Perhaps by "gay" you were referring to the older, more mature men over 30 whom you favor as sex partners.
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If this is some sarcastic, off-handed swipe at me I don't appreciate it and will not be represented in a false light.
Whew. I thought he (jesse) might have meant me since this was brought up during our first PM exchange. But I double-checked: I wasn't told about the confidential nature of anything, so I did not spread beans.
To be clear, jesse did not expressly tell me he was going to be on the cover- just to check it out that I might like it.
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oh my...the plot thickens.
how many beans were passed around?
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oh my...the plot thickens.
how many beans were passed around?
With all the beans...I don't think I want to be in the same room..I remember "Blazing Saddles"...
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This is so, so sad. Jesse, you seem like a good guy deep down. But buddy, you are really rubbing me (and I sense many others here) the wrong way.
HIV is not about fame. It is not a platform. Your cover story, important to expressing your own personal struggles aside, is far too focused on the wrong things; and I fear that you're missing the point of this place: community.
Personally, for the first time I am very disappointed and embarrassed at POZ's editorial choices as the publication of record representing people with HIV/AIDS.
The world already has Paris Hilton, and I certainly do not come here expecting to find her staring back at me.
Respectfully,
Chap
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i hate to repeat myself...but...
Let us also not forget just how far humility goes...I can remember being a fresh faced, 19 year old...I was on a hugely popular NBC saturday morning TV show...and it wasn't until I lost many friends...no not because I was on TV...it was because I was complete and utter ASS!
There is nothing wrong with with following dreams and doing what it is we set out to do...but there is a problem with a holier than thou attitude it leaves you friendless and alone...
And the other thing is...as fast you rise to your 15 minutes...it only takes a minute to fall...
Just sain...
I don't think POZ has anything to do with fame.
My friends would never leave my side and nor would I.
They love me much and I care for them very much.
I am very happy to say my friends are amazing girls with great hearts. :-*
They mean the world to me and they have been great supporters from the start.
I love the chicas! ;D
And I am not hinting that POZ = fame...
Jesse darling... you missed the point...it's not just your "chicas" but anyone you expect to follow you along the way...and look at some of the reaction you are getting here...I really don't want you take this the wrong way, but seriously dude, in order to be successful, its important to be aware of your community of support...and alienating them wont help. I am only saying this because I got the same advice once...and I am very grateful to woman who gave it to me...Celebrity, fame...all of it is fleeting and with out communal support, you have nothing.
The worst thing for a journalist is when no one reads you any more...and I too am a bit disappointed with some of the editorial choices the magazine has made...because Jess, we are all here because we have HIV/AIDS...I hope that you will one day, soon, you will see that those of us who have it made through our twenties...know something about life and how life can treat those who aren't willing to learn.
Have fun, go for what you dream...but remember the people who helped you along the way...and who have come into your life...because as a wonderful performer once told me..."people will turn on you faster than a rabid dog, honey...so feed them well!" What this means is, be respectful of who you are around and the community you belong to...it may not always be there when you need it.
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I hate to say this cause its my style to be "polite" but the poor kid has been "falling" ever since he got here. He can't seem to handle the advice that we are all trying to give him, some gently and others not so gently, as far as being politically correct here in the threads. Its just so damn irritating, but that's what he gets off on, the ATTENTION. So, I guess I just fed him another bite.....sigh.
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The thing I got from the article is that Jesus is a 19 year old gay male who is predictably immature, self absorbed and (unfortunately for him) went looking for love and validation in all the wrong places.
He says he knew all the facts, but felt he was invincible. I don't buy the invincible part. I think he was so desperate for attention and validation, thought so little of himself as someone deserving respect and true love, that he was willing to use the one thing he has always used to get the attention he so obviously needs. His body and his looks.
Maybe the point of the article (and I concede I'm reaching here) was to present us with the reality of why stopping the spread of this virus is so damned hard. We can spend bundles of money to warn about the risk, but in the end it comes down to each person.
Jesus is a 19 year old face that I suspect resides all across this country.
He doesn't seem to have a clue as to what being HIV + is going to do to his life.
He hasn't indicated any sort of personal growth that acknowledges an awareness of what got him to this point.
He only sees it (temporarily I suspect) as another opportunity to market himself via a national speaking tour to try and reach out to other young people.
IF he steps back, takes the opportunity to seriously look at who he is as a gay man and a person deserving of self respect, then incorporates that into his message, he could perhaps become an effective messenger.
Right now, he seems to be stuck on the self absorbed and not so much on the self growth.
Another victim has joined our ranks, when his walls come crashing down and the reality becomes that, reality, he'll understand completely what it is that so many here have tried to communicate to him.
Until then, it'll be about designer sun glasses, glamor shots, and how many posts "my" presence can generate.
Jess, don't let go of your dreams. Hold onto your ambitions. But if you truly desire to be a messenger for change, then start that change from within.
That would be my advice.
RAB
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Received similar conversation from Jesse as Bucko and Hunter did. And was the first communication which I received from him. I was wondering who it was that spilled the beans.
"If you read POZ magazine you might enjoy the september issue, and you might find a familiar face on the cover."--excerpt from pm received from Jesse August 12, 2007 at 10:38:23 pm.
So, just putting together a profile here of who was told/bragged to.
All the people thus far were: males, white, aged 30's and 40's, gay, live in the South, post face pics, are guys who are attractive (or so I think of Bucko and Hunter anyway).
Am I missing something here? Or have I just found something?
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
It's a shame to see someone unable to be able to celebrate something they are proud of for accomplishing, but........I'll just leave it at this, as I can't bring myself to be repugnant. It's easier to get your hands dirty than it is to get them clean. I think the message conveys as stated above.
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Matty the Damned may as well join the stoolie choir and reveal that the very second PM he received from Jesus was about the spread in Poz. He wasn't told it was a secret.
Even if he was told it was hush hush he still would have blabbed it to everyone in the Cabal. Matty the Damned owes Mesdames Chew and Hofmann no favours.
MtD
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and I had such a great little 'profile' going there.
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Wait till you have had this disease for quite some time like the rest of us here have had and see how much you like it then come back and tell your story. There are so many here that have stories that would blow your mind. I have been with this virus for over two years and can say when I first came here I too wanted attentiion but that changed. I went from having a CD4 count of 1 and stayed in the hospital for over 7 days and was told by the doctor to get ready for my funeral. I went from 185lbs and healthy to 125lbs and could not swallow a pill. Had to be taken to the doctor every week for four months just to get my blood work done and then they had a hard time finding a vein to stick me. :'( I went from having a job to almost dying back in 2005 and you say that your friends will always be there for you think again. My only friends that I have are right here on this site if it was not for them I would never had been here in the first place.
Now after being on meds since 2005 I finally can say my numbers are slowly climbing back up but im still under 200. My weight has finally came back. But now the sad part is I have to take meds the rest of my life just to stay alive. When you or if you ever start to take meds and your weight starts to drop and you face is not so pretty anymore and then you can say that you have lived the life of having AIDS. :'(
Damn this Disease....... >:( >:( >:(
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Wait till you have had this disease for quite some time like the rest of us here have had and see how much you like it then come back and tell your story. There are so many here that have stories that would blow your mind. I have been with this virus for over two years and can say when I first came here I too wanted attentiion but that changed. I went from having a CD4 count of 1 and stayed in the hospital for over 7 days and was told by the doctor to get ready for my funeral. I went from 185lbs and healthy to 125lbs and could not swallow a pill. Had to be taken to the doctor every week for four months just to get my blood work done and then they had a hard time finding a vein to stick me. :'( I went from having a job to almost dying back in 2005 and you say that your friends will always be there for you think again. My only friends that I have are right here on this site if it was not for them I would never had been here in the first place.
Now after being on meds since 2005 I finally can say my numbers are slowly climbing back up but im still under 200. My weight has finally came back. But now the sad part is I have to take meds the rest of my life just to stay alive. When you or if you ever start to take meds and your weight starts to drop and you face is not so pretty anymore and then you can say that you have lived the life of having AIDS. :'(
Damn this Disease....... >:( >:( >:(
First off, who said I like it? I doubt anyone who gets diagnosed wants this or feels good about themselves. I bet there are many people with mind blowing stories to tell, and I have met some people in person who have told me mind blowing things. After being diagnosed I dated a guy who is on salvage treatment and trust me! I learned alot! More than I could have ever expected.
If you take care of yourself, eat right, workout, and put your health first you can maintain your health and that is exactly what I do. If I start on meds well so be it. I am not excited about it, but I have to do what I have to do in order to stay alive. As for the friends commentary I beg to differ. You don't know the people I hang with, my click, or my friends... and to be rather honest me. My friends found out from Day 1, and none of them have departed from my life. They have not pushed me away, or made me feel any less. They make me feel good about myself and make me want to keep going when I am having a bad day. Each time I go to the doctors I take a new girlfriend of mine to meet my physician and I am glad and super lucky to have these kind of friends.
I personally feel horrible that you had to go through such tough times and I am grateful for the medical advances that have been made. Hopefully I will never reach the AIDs stage of the disease because of proper care. I am fortunate that I was diagnosed as I was converting, and I will do whatever is possible to keep myself away from the pills as long as I have to.
--Can we all now drop the subject.
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If you take care of yourself, eat right, workout, and put your health first you can maintain your health and that is exactly what I do.
I'm sorry Jess, but that's just not the case. Whilst a healthy lifestyle can help, for the majority of people with HIV it will not prevent the inexorable development of AIDS.
MtD
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--Can we all now drop the subject.
I haven't even worked up my post in here yet.
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If you take care of yourself, eat right, workout, and put your health first you can maintain your health and that is exactly what I do.
I'm sorry Jess, but that's just not the case. Whilst a healthy lifestyle can help, for the majority of people with HIV it will not prevent the inexorable development of AIDS.
MtD
I understand that, but if I can maintain my numbers in good shape and my viral low I can hold off on pills that's all.
Only time will tell what will happen to me. :)
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Honey a healthy lifestyle is very important, but unless you're a non-progressor (and you almost certainly are not) you will require meds one day.
MtD
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I haven't even worked up my post in here yet.
So problematic...
-Haineux-
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Honey a healthy lifestyle is very important, but unless you're a non-progressor (and you almost certainly are not) you will require meds one day.
MtD
I have only had this for 6 months. So I don't know what will happen.
My numbers vary and I will try to keep them in good shape until I need the pill.
Who knows maybe I will become a non progressor, but for now all I can do is wait and watch. ;)
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(http://www.mysmiley.net/imgs/smile/party/party0052.gif)
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(http://www.mysmiley.net/imgs/smile/party/party0052.gif)
LMAO...
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(http://www.mysmiley.net/imgs/smile/party/party0052.gif)
That is super cute, and I find the humor in all this! ;D
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Who knows maybe I will become a non progressor, but for now all I can do is wait and watch.
I hope you're a long term non progressor or viremic controller!
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If you take care of yourself, eat right, workout, and put your health first you can maintain your health and that is exactly what I do.
This is also the quote that stuck out to me. Ohhhhh...... there is soooo much more to it, than that.
Take care------Ray
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(http://www.mysmiley.net/imgs/smile/party/party0052.gif)
can I join you?
(http://www.mysmiley.net/imgs/smile/party/party0051.gif)
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I understand that, but if I can maintain my numbers in good shape and my viral low I can hold off on pills that's all.
Only time will tell what will happen to me. :)
Gosh...that was my problem. I didn't work hard enough to control my VL, and that's why I've flatlined twice. I really should have spent more time in the gym!
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If you take care of yourself, eat right, workout, and put your health first you can maintain your health and that is exactly what I do.
And there it is. That right there is what has gotten my goat about this article. And I believe for so many others here as well.
Personally, I'll give jesse some props for putting himself out there on the cover of POZ. To announce to the world "I'm gay and HIV positive" at 19 takes some moxie. Whatever his motives all may be, I'm not going to completely rain on his parade and down on him about it. If I was 19 and openly positive & got featured on a magazine like POZ, I might be bursting at the seams to have people see it and talk about it, too. And I don't think I'm the conceited type- it's just a big, exciting thing to be a part of something like that.
No, my ire falls squarely with the POZ magazine crew. I ate a dougnut this morning that had less sugar-coating than that article. Jesse says he wishes to maybe be a spokesman and educator to other young people about HIV / AIDS...but what message would they be getting from a look at this article?
Be young, be attractive, be affluent, have fabulous friends...HIV: It's all right here.
POZ Magazine deserves a collective slap across the face. Far from educational, it comes damn near to being a promotional campaign for HIV. Hell, I almost wanted to get infected from reading it.
Until I remembered that I already was.
POZ has done a huge disservice to its audience with the way this piece was presented. I think they did a bit of a disservice to Jesse as well. The above quoted statement shows the disconnect between what young people need to know about being positive and what they are being fed. It shows how POZ is failing in its efforts to really educate and challenge. Worse, it suggests they don't particularly care.
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can I join you?
(http://www.mysmiley.net/imgs/smile/party/party0051.gif)
Great - now it's a party
(http://www.mysmiley.net/freesmiley.php?smiley=party/party0001.gif)
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Nobody can predict exactly what will happen to Jesse in his life with HIV. Jesse has a good attitude about it and that helps alot. He's young yet, as we all were, and of course there's lots for him to learn.
I have to say this- I give him a heap of credit for being polite as he can be to all of the people here who have given him the biggest ration of crap I've seen in here in a long tme. And I'm appalled that the moderators have allowed it to go on for so long.
Paul
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No, my ire falls squarely with the POZ magazine crew. I ate a dougnut this morning that had less sugar-coating than that article. Jesse says he wishes to maybe be a spokesman and educator to other young people about HIV / AIDS...but what message would they be getting from a look at this article?
Be young, be attractive, be affluent, have fabulous friends...HIV: It's all right here.
POZ Magazine deserves a collective slap across the face. Far from educational, it comes damn near to being a promotional campaign for HIV. Hell, I almost wanted to get infected from reading it.
Until I remembered that I already was.
POZ has done a huge disservice to its audience with the way this piece was presented. I think they did a bit of a disservice to Jesse as well. The above quoted statement shows the disconnect between what young people need to know about being positive and what they are being fed. It shows how POZ is failing in its efforts to really educate and challenge. Worse, it suggests they don't particularly care.
I would love to agree with you wholeheartedly, Tim, except for one thing:
Regan Hoffman didn't find Jessie while she was trolling through the pages of Manhunt.net. It's never been properly explained to me how an unknown 19-year-old kid lands on the cover of a national magazine. It's not like he's ever done anything more fabulous than create a nifty MySpace page (which, BTW, is not out-poz, not that I'd expect it to be). Somehow the machinations of a celebrity wanna-be met with the shrewd calculations of a professional AIDS-careerist and shiller for Big Pharma. It's a match made on E! Television.
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So problematic...
-Haineux-
and what is that about?
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I dropped out of that readership last year because I could not identify with alot of it... Its a bit more real being stuck in these rooms with all of ya I must say... Thanks for being here. You to Jesse, thanks for being here. I have to say you got a long way to go babe... To each his own and in his own way.. Don't grow up to fast. Enjoy what you are experiencing and living life. None of us should squash that.... Best wishes in your young life..
Eric
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Although some good points have been made, I find the criticism of POZ magazine and Jesse to be a tad overdone. I think some people are distorting the reality of the situation a bit.
The article is highlighting an important issue which is that young guys are continuing to seroconvert. Maybe the fact that Jesse is not some extraordinary person is exactly what makes it possible for people to relate to him. I think he sounds like a fairly normal young guy. I'm sure he'll grow up a lot in the next couple of years though!
The article is not saying he's an innocent victim, it states that he knew 100% the risk he was taking and even his friends warned him. But, as youth does, he felt invincible and didn't fully think through the consequences of his actions. Maybe if other young guys see that HIV actually DOES get passed to young guys like Jesse, they will wake up and take notice. Maybe Jesse can bring that message to them so that they will stay safe!
I'm really glad that Jesse has had the courage to be open about his sexual orientation and HIV status because I also think it gives a human face to the statistics regarding the continuing spread of the virus. Yes, I think this does help to lessen the stigma of being HIV+, and I'm thankful to him for that. I don't think this equates to glamorizing HIV.
I also don't think that somebody like Jesse, exposed to HIV in 2007, IS facing the same consequences as those who were exposed in the past. The meds HAVE got better, and he has every reason to look forward to a long, healthy and side effect free life. I do!
I've been poz for 9 years now and started taking meds six months ago. I had a bumpy ride with Sustiva but have now found a regime that is entirely side effect free, and effective. I personally don't find being HIV+ a big deal anymore, from a health perspective. Don't hate me for being HIV+ and doing well with it!! LOL
I'm not denying (of course) that there are people having a hard time with HIV for a variety of reasons, but the community has to acknowledge those of us who are doing well too, in order for there to be a fair presentation of everyone's experience.
Wishing you all the best, Jesse! :-)
Andrew
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Nobody can predict exactly what will happen to Jesse in his life with HIV. Jesse has a good attitude about it and that helps alot. He's young yet, as we all were, and of course there's lots for him to learn.
I have to say this- I give him a heap of credit for being polite as he can be to all of the people here who have given him the biggest ration of crap I've seen in here in a long tme. And I'm appalled that the moderators have allowed it to go on for so long.
Paul
Paul -- agreed. I have found this thread to be pretty sad, especially as a reflection of the so-called "community" that exists here. Jesse has been called arrogant and naive again and again by the cynical mob, and has kept up a friendly demeanor in response. So who here has the more open mind to how others perceive things? Who here actually sounds arrogant with their one-size-fits-all-dying-from-HIV party line -- stick to it, or find some other forums!
Trust me, Jesse rubbed me the wrong way right from the get-go, but I admire any 19 year old that publically discloses their HIV status, especially THIS publically. Sure, he's naive, but at least he's not cynical and nasty yet. At least his mind seems to be open to the remarkable spectrum of all our experiences, living with HIV.
Peter
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Jesse has been called arrogant and naive again and again by the cynical mob, and has kept up a friendly demeanor in response.
Peter
Well, he just called me hateful before I had even posted anything in this thread. Just for the record.
And I was in the proces of typing out a post giving him props for doing the spread.
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I hate to say this cause its my style to be "polite" but the poor kid has been "falling" ever since he got here. He can't seem to handle the advice that we are all trying to give him, some gently and others not so gently, as far as being politically correct here in the threads. Its just so damn irritating, but that's what he gets off on, the ATTENTION. So, I guess I just fed him another bite.....sigh.
Cindy, i hate to disagree with you but I have to disagree with you.
I agree with others that POZ editorial staff may be guilty of showing the "omg this is nothing now in 2007!" face of being INFECTED by the HIV VIRUS. It would be nice if they could remind people that this IS A DEADLY VIRUS IF NOT TREATED AND THAT TREATMENT IS WILL NOT BE LIKE GETTING VITAMIN C ONCE A DAY :-[
So I blame the POZ interviewer for not going deeper and asking Jesse what he thinks about his life with medication, his peers, his knowledge of the history of HIV and AIDS, and what he plans to do if things go bad. I can only hope that things will go good for the kid, he got infected at a time when there are many possibilities for him to live with it as an "annoyance" more than anything.
Don't blame him for not knowing anything about humps, lipoatrophy, PN, and other terrible side effects. Did I ever get to know those before I join those forums? NEVER HEARD ABOUT THEM BEFORE. The first time I heard about those terrible side effects was 6 months ago, and I thought I knew everything about HIV, because I knew everything that I was told by the mainstream media and the gay publications, which conveniently "forget" about them.
Jesse is acting like a puppy, he makes me think of my new puppy a lot, he bites a bit, lots of mouthing, nipping, but overall has only one goal in life: have fun. And I would hate that we, adults, prevent him from having fun and looking forward a long life.
Milker.
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Sure, he's naive, but at least he's not cynical and nasty yet. At least his mind seems to be open to the remarkable spectrum of all our experiences, living with HIV.
Peter
NEVER WILL I BE so hateful and so "bitchy" towards anyone!!!! So don't worry about me ever becoming cynical or nasty! I would never criticize anyones life or way of being!
I respect everyone for their individuality and unique characters. Everyone has something different to bring to the table, and I like that!
-Jesse
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He is a bug chaser. That's what they do.
A dabble in history will illuminate that. I am many things, Peter. I am not often wrong. Certainly not about that.
Cynical? Not nearly enough, Peter. He is the future of the forums, and the pandemic.
God/ess leave you to him and it. Best of all possible wishes.
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He is a bug chaser. That's that they do.
WHAT ?????????????????
This is insulting.
Milker.
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So I blame the POZ interviewer for not going deeper and asking Jesse what he thinks about his life with medication, his peers, his knowledge of the history of HIV and AIDS, and what he plans to do if things go bad. I can only hope that things will go good for the kid, he got infected at a time when there are many possibilities for him to live with it as an "annoyance" more than anything.
Don't blame him for not knowing anything about humps, lipoatrophy, PN, and other terrible side effects. Did I ever get to know those before I join those forums? NEVER HEARD ABOUT THEM BEFORE. The first time I heard about those terrible side effects was 6 months ago, and I thought I knew everything about HIV, because I knew everything that I was told by the mainstream media and the gay publications, which conveniently "forget" about them.
Well said, Milker! And that is what I was trying to say about them doing Jesse a disservice as well, but you said it so much better.
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Cindy, i hate to disagree with you but I have to disagree with you.
I agree with others that POZ editorial staff may be guilty of showing the "omg this is nothing now in 2007!" face of being INFECTED by the HIV VIRUS. It would be nice if they could remind people that this IS A DEADLY VIRUS IF NOT TREATED AND THAT TREATMENT IS WILL NOT BE LIKE GETTING VITAMIN C ONCE A DAY :-[
So I blame the POZ interviewer for not going deeper and asking Jesse what he thinks about his life with medication, his peers, his knowledge of the history of HIV and AIDS, and what he plans to do if things go bad. I can only hope that things will go good for the kid, he got infected at a time when there are many possibilities for him to live with it as an "annoyance" more than anything.
Don't blame him for not knowing anything about humps, lipoatrophy, PN, and other terrible side effects. Did I ever get to know those before I join those forums? NEVER HEARD ABOUT THEM BEFORE. The first time I heard about those terrible side effects was 6 months ago, and I thought I knew everything about HIV, because I knew everything that I was told by the mainstream media and the gay publications, which conveniently "forget" about them.
Jesse is acting like a puppy, he makes me think of my new puppy a lot, he bites a bit, lots of mouthing, nipping, but overall has only one goal in life: have fun. And I would hate that we, adults, prevent him from having fun and looking forward a long life.
Milker.
Milkie-
If you care about what kind of dog you wind up with, you need to discipline the puppy. Otherwise the house stinks and the floors are ruined.
He is a bug chaser. That's what they do.
A dabble in history will illuminate that. I am many things, Peter. I am not often wrong. Certainly not about that.
Cynical? Not nearly enough, Peter. He is the future of the forums, and the pandemic.
God/ess leave you to him and it. Best of all possible wishes.
It's a shame it took this to bring JK back into the light. Brilliant and resolutely spot-on as always.
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Matty the Damned suspects Poz magazine has dealt with Jesse in a supremely unethical fashion. Does the boy understand the consequences of his outing himself? Did Sally Chew explain these things to him or did she just manipulate his desperate need for attention?
MtD
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Yeah well in that case we're all bug chasers.
I'll withdraw from this discussion.
Milker.
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Yeah well in that case we're all bug chasers.
I'll withdraw from this discussion.
Milker.
Yep... I guess according to that person we are the stereotypical bug chasers = gay, IV drug users, black, or sex worker...
Talk about closed minded and cynical
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-Haineux-
Still would like you to comment on this. I don't see that I posted anything to warrant that.
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Matty the Damned suspects Poz magazine has dealt with Jesse in a supremely unethical fashion. Does the boy understand the consequences of his outing himself? Did Sally Chew explain these things to him or did she just manipulate his desperate need for attention?
MtD
I don't think that you, Jesse, are a bug chaser. I do think that you crave and thrive on attention. I, too, withdraw from this discussion. Best of luck to you.
~Cindy
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Paul -- agreed. I have found this thread to be pretty sad, especially as a reflection of the so-called "community" that exists here. Jesse has been called arrogant and naive again and again by the cynical mob, and has kept up a friendly demeanor in response. So who here has the more open mind to how others perceive things? Who here actually sounds arrogant with their one-size-fits-all-dying-from-HIV party line -- stick to it, or find some other forums!
Trust me, Jesse rubbed me the wrong way right from the get-go, but I admire any 19 year old that publically discloses their HIV status, especially THIS publically. Sure, he's naive, but at least he's not cynical and nasty yet. At least his mind seems to be open to the remarkable spectrum of all our experiences, living with HIV.
Peter
Peter
I'm perfectly comfortable with what I posted in response to the article. I don't know Jess beyond what was presented in the article. In my opinion it did paint a picture of a 19 year old who is immature and self absorbed. I stand by that.
I think the problem here isn't so much what you describe as a "pretty sad" response from others, the problem is as others have pointed out. POZ magazine appears to have taken advantage of a vulnerable 19 year old, one who clearly craves attention. The shame (if there is any) doesn't rest with the responses from members of these forums in my opinion, the shame rests with the corporate culture who took advantage of this young man. Not unlike the "older" men who preyed on him and one of whom probably passed on the virus.
So before you climb on your high horse and admonish others for their reactions, perhaps you should hold yourself and Smart and Strong to the same standard of criticism you have felt free to impose of others.
RAB
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To clarify somethings...
Attention: I don't lack any. If you take a look at myspace you can realize that I have a very busy schedule and eventful life so attention was not a reason. My friends provide me with enough fun things to do. Put yourself in my shoes kiddos, I just exposed my status and my sexual orientation to the public. It will effect my life, career, and future! I did it with the idea that young teens will get the word. Read the magazine section that says, "on the cover" and you will see another reason why I did it. My friends are valuable to me and if my story can spread awareness in the teen community, I have reached my goal.
In the end I am the one on the cover. So people stop trying to make conclusions.
I AM CLARIFYING THAT NOW... LATER ON I DON'T WANT ANYONE SAYING, "I DON'T KNOW YOU SO I GUESSED"
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you STILL need to answer me.
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you STILL need to answer me.
Need is a powerful word....
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Um, I think it's a bit of a stretch to start judging and determining that Jesse has been "taken advantage of" by the "corporate culture".
The only way this could be the case is if you believe that publically revealing your HIV status is a negative thing. And this can only be the case as long as there is a stigma attached to being HIV+!
If some gay magazine ran a cover story about Jesse a year ago, before he was poz, announcing that he was gay, nobody would be claiming that he was taken advantage of.
It's only by people like Jesse "coming out" about their HIV status that the HIV stigma, such that it is, will be put aside!
Good thing there are courageous people like Jesse who are willing to step up and do their part. His action helps motivate me to be more open about my HIV status.
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Wellll, isn't that speciall???
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I probably should hold my tongue, but here goes:
If Jesse is 19 and immature and self-absorbed, and is HIV+ then why should his experience not be in POZ? As I tried to point out before, if he's HIV+, his story is as truthful as a 20 years survivor who's been to death's door. It is his experience. Of course he doesn't know of some of the horrible things that can happen. Maybe he will in time, maybe not. I have no crystal ball. (Does everyone even remember what it was like to be 19)
Do the people protesting the "sunnyness" of the article really think the readership of POZ needs to be reminded in every article what a serious disease this is. Really?
As to being taken advantage of? If 19 is old enough for the USA to ship men and women half way around the world to some godforsaken desert to risk having their heads blown off, I think its old enough to decide if you want to share your story with a magazine.
I am a bit disappointed that some claim to know exactly what Jesse's motive was in "acquiring" HIV. Do you know mine too :(
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Correct me if I’m wrong, two of the fastest-growing categories of new infections, are women and people of color. Were’s there stores? To raise awareness and bolster prevention efforts don’t you think that there stores would do the world good? And lets not forget the people (LTS’S) that made this magazine what it is today. Without us there would be no POZ magazine,
Let the truth be told.
Not some sugar coating that none HIV+ people will never read
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Edfu,
Blow me.
-Andrew
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Honestly any article written in POZ magazine will not be able to touch everyone, and not everybody will be able to relate to the person being written about. I have read other articles about other peoples stories and some of them i feel like "wow this is just how i feel" and others im like "huh?". I think that it is important to write articles about different people from different backgrounds, cultures, and values. I think its nice that they wrote about someone with such a positive outlook and is trying to deal with his diagnosis and not giving up on the goals he has in life. Sure his life will change, he might learn that having HIV is not as easy as he thought, he will probably end up on treatment someday, BUT today the meds are not like they were in the 1990's there are many more options. Im sure that plenty of young people are infected and might need a boost of confidence. I do think that humility is important in a person and I for one dont really relate to the article, but im sure someone will.
The article doesnt really send much of a prevention message because it does make it seem like its no big deal but most of the poz readers are already HIV positive....
-josh
(who is tired from working all day and speaking in spanish so isnt really conveying his thoughts clearly today....)
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Interesting points, but consequences can have silver linings. (And yeah, consequences can give us those problematic cans of worms too. Who's to say?) Example: What if Jesse predicts his life, career, etc will be rooted mainly in a queer-friendly, HIV-friendly environment? Then the article is likely more of a service than a disservice.
The editors should publish a follow-up on Jesse and call it "Five Years Into the Fire" or something like that. If they don't do a follow-up and instead opt for fresh meat, well, that will and should raise a few eyebrows.
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Well, I will say he got the attention he was going after by starting this thread. Remember Queen tolerated him when the majority would like to string him up by his balls...*quite the visual, I might add*..I think it's great that he's soooooo freaking open but the message I get from his article is: Hey, look at me. I am 19 and went through countless older men because I am cute and look good. I knew I could become + but so what.
I'm sorry but even to the younger generation, I feel he is setting a bad example. Not every 19 yr old comes from money and I know the ghettos of Miami, I use to live in them. And Jesse you say middle class, I don't know anyone who is middle class that buys their son a new car every year. I have to question how someone who just started in the forums even got a cover on Poz and only 6 months infected. Sorry but I feel like someone's pockets got lined real good. I could be wrong and maybe I am but that is the perception I got. Call me bitter if you want to but you would be wrong, it is more like confused. I know I was once called Suzy Sunshine or some name on here and it is good to think those good thoughts but Jesse, you have me on the verge of gagging on it. But I will thank you for making me see how others prolly saw me at one point. I will always be grateful to be 10 yrs with this and no meds but I will never force it down someone's throat.
I don't do MySpace anymore but wondering if you are just as open about being + on there? You say you have friends who are sticking by you and maybe you do but I have to wonder if many are there because of what you have and I don't mean the virus. Then you say you have cliques or clicks, not sure of the correct spelling but most cliques are not open and only a "certain" type of person may join them. Not sure if you're picking up on what I am saying....
I will congratulate you for your openess about being poz but can do little more than that because to me it sounds like Poz magazine joined your clique and turned into a Jesse cheerleader like the rest of your crew...
(who is not bitter but keeps it real)
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Have we never heard of a lease? ???
Its the most convenient and common thing to do ;)
Jesse
(Who is super tired of trying to make people understand his life) >:(
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Andrew,
Is that intended as an invitation or an insult?
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Is that intended as an invitation or an insult?
-snicker- :D
Jeez Ed, are you growing a sense of humour? ;)
MtD
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I'm trying, Matty, I'm trying. Get better soon.
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Have we never heard of a lease? ???
Its the most convenient and common thing to do ;)
Jesse
(Who is super tired of trying to make people understand his life) >:(
Now it sounds like you are the one getting bitchy and I thought you don't get that way???? And what do you mean by your statement or is that some new lingo I know nothing of? Oh, you mean lease the car...Well, folks from the hood don't lease cars, sweetie. And has never liked having a car note of any kind..And it must be common in suburbia...how bougie..... :-X
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Jesse, if you're so "tired" of trying to "make" people "understand" your life, why do you make such a point of exhibiting it and then bragging about it?
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Jesse, if you're so "tired" of trying to "make" people "understand" your life, why do you make such a point of exhibiting it and then bragging about it?
Exactly...
(who is too ghetto to be on the cover of Poz) :P
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First off Jesse I want to congratulate you on having the guts to do this article. There are however a few aspects of this that sit uncomfortably with me with regards to the behavior of poz magazine. I hope someone sat down with Jesse beforehand and fully explained to him the consequences of outing himself like this (which I doubt). As I was reading the article I just kept getting the impression that he was being taken advantage of slightly. I also don't know what poz magazine was trying to achieve by portraying someone like this who had only been diagnosed for 6 months. I don't think you could possibly begin to fully come to terms with the reality of a HIV diagnosis until at least a year after the event.
When I was diagnosed for the first 6 months I was tackling everything head on. Finishing my university degree and disclosing to all my friends and parents. It's only after a while when all that initial activity is finished, everything has settled and you've had a chance to sit down and think does the real reality of living with HIV hit home. This is where this article has gone wrong in my opinion. In short right person, definitely wrong time.
Chris
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He is a bug chaser. That's what they do.
A dabble in history will illuminate that. I am many things, Peter. I am not often wrong. Certainly not about that.
Jonathan -- that's a rather scurrilous accusation to be throwing around in these forums. You crossed a line. Consider this a warning.
Peter
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Queen does raise a very interesting point: just how does somone get on the cover and the subject of an interview that damn fast? He said he became positive in February of this year...and he says this article has been in the works since April of this year. That's two measly months from diagnosis to cover. Wow.
And Jesse: Hate to still push a point, but it really speaks to your true character that you made that stupid ''haineux'' comment to me unprovoked, you have been made aware of it in this thread- and are deliberately ignoring it and refusing to apologize for it.
No, you would NEVER treat anyone poorly. Not you...
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This thread gives me a headache...
>:(
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It just makes me extremely sad, Dan.
25 years of AIDS, and what have we learned?
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Obviously we haven't learned very much & that there is a lot more work that needs to be done.
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25 years of AIDS, and what have we learned?
Indeed. While I am impressed by Jesse's confidence and strength at putting himself out there as being poz and not ashamed, which in itself is a powerful accomplishment not to be done without careful weighing of the consequences (in my mind), I am a little be saddened by the article.
While this was obviously not done with any altruistic intentions meant to help prevent others from making the same mistake, it is indeed the content of the article in POZ that made me feel like I was reading People magazine. In my opinion, the triteness of the article was not the most disturbing aspect but what it caused me to realize. As others have aptly stated, the attiude portrayed through this interview about the prevention and risks of HIV and the lackadaisical attiude that is so pervasive about it (especially in the younger generations) makes me very very sad.
So, Jesse, I am impressed at your courage to put yourself out there and I am also glad that your positive outlook about having HIV is working for you but I am do think that a more positive message could have and should have been sent with this article.
JP
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Matty the Damned suspects Poz magazine has dealt with Jesse in a supremely unethical fashion. Does the boy understand the consequences of his outing himself? Did Sally Chew explain these things to him or did she just manipulate his desperate need for attention?
MtD
Those were my exact thoughts as soon as I began reading this thread and saw the article. Jesse, they used you. Whoever infected you probabaly did, and the women of Poz ate you up and spat you out without a second thought for your future wellbeing. This is not the Paris Hilton porn tape that she could get out of with the righ money and PR and lawyers. This is exposing you big time, for everyone, on paper and online. In your full name. To leak to whomever, whenever, and you are still in your teens.
This is not doing the rounds at colleges or schools to speak about HIV, this is uncontrolable exposure. And I have worked in several magazines and I know exactly how much (little) thought most reporters and editors have for their subjects beyond the caption and the deadline. I pity you Jesse, I really do. You must break out of the cycle of letting people use you. And as for the people who made this editorial choice, at least one of the has spent a very very long time in the closet, so she should know much better.
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Matty the Damned suspects Poz magazine has dealt with Jesse in a supremely unethical fashion. Does the boy understand the consequences of his outing himself? Did Sally Chew explain these things to him or did she just manipulate his desperate need for attention?
MtD, I definitely agree that there is an issue there. The article also bothered me with another, more subtle, issue that was glossed over.
It states that Jesse got his poz diagnosis as he turned 19, after having sex with men in their 30's. Somehow that almost smacks of pedophilia. Those men took advantage of his naiveté and the magazine may have too :(
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What this comes down to, for me, is that Poz magazine decided to do a "fluff" article. No delving into details about having HIV, how it was acquired, or what the consequences may be. It is something that would be right at home in "People" or "Us". I realize not every article will be in-depth, but I think the cover story should be.
Poz magazine's leadership and editorial board are free to take the publication in whatever direction they like. I am free to provide them feedback here, and say that I would have expected more from Poz.
Note that I am not saying that Jesse is fluff, just that the article is fluff. Yes, it is true that is it quite an accomplishment to have the guts to out one's self on a magazine cover as HIV+. That could be said of anyone who appeared on the cover. In my opinion, the writer and editors could have done more.
I can only guess how Poz magazine select the subjects for their covers: they have got to be attention-getting, be relevant to the readership, and represent a new / unique angle on HIV and AIDS. This cover accomplished the first; the second I am not so sure about, and the last, not so much.
If Poz magazine is interested in putting a 43-year old software development manager on their cover, they are free to contact me. The high-tech face of HIV -- there's an angle for you! ::)
Regards,
Henry
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The article also bothered me with another, more subtle, issue that was glossed over. It states that Jesse got his poz diagnosis as he turned 19, after having sex with men in their 30's.
I agree with Matty and Leatherman that Poz missed an opportunity to delve into an angle of the story that would have made it more interesting and relevant for many readers: how did such a young man become infected, and what does he think would have prevented it?
Regards,
Henry
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Well all I can say is, its sad... I've read everyones point of views... I'll read the article for this month... but, I do not think its going to digest well with me. So I'll wait and state... No Comment!
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I agree with Matty and Leatherman that Poz missed an opportunity to delve into an angle of the story that would have made it more interesting and relevant for many readers: how did such a young man become infected, and what does he think would have prevented it?
I'm not sure whether these questions would make the story more interesting or relevant. After all, POZ magazine is written for people who have already tested positive.
However, if the story had appeared in a mainstream magazine, a magazine targeted at a younger or a latino crowd, then it would have made a stronger impact, at least it would raise a good portion of awareness.
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I'm not sure whether these questions would make the story more interesting or relevant. After all, POZ magazine is written for people who have already tested positive.
However, if the story had appeared in a mainstream magazine, a magazine targeted at a younger or a latino crowd, then it would have made a stronger impact, at least it would raise a good portion of awareness.
Cerrie-
The article has nothing to do with prevention or awareness. It's about desperation. The desperation of a young man who'll do anything to be a celebrity and the ruthless ambition of an editor who uses his desperation to push magazines (and advertising dollars) at the expense of the young man's future privacy.
Of course he found Ms Hoffman and Ms Chew charming and accepting. That's how they got him to expose himself so completely. Jessie seems to consider himself a spokesmodel for HIV and the Fabulous Life. The first time he finds himself chained to a toilet for a week or begins to notice how the therapy that is saving his life is also savaging his appearance it will not seem quite so glamorous.
And at that lonely and terrifying time, will either of the heartless, greedy harridans who have exploited his diagnosis be around to comfort him or offer any support?
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Ms Chew seems to go out of her way to almost excuse Jesus' infection because he lacked the maturity to deal with relationships with older men. Yet no where in the article does she ever mention his father or the type of relationship they have or don't have. We get a pretty good glimpse in such a short article of the mother/son dynamic, but I am curious why no mention of dad.
I also wondered why she didn't ask, what type of post diagnosis counseling Jesus received. Was he left to his own devices to sort this all out by spending a week at Starbuck's with his obviously HIV naive gal pals. What message does this send to other youngsters?
Finally, if the purpose of this article was to show how Jesus planned to use his new found status to help his peers. Why in the world didn't Ms Chew ask Jesus what advice he might like to give to someone Hiv negative or positive that might be reading the article?
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Finally, if the purpose of this article was to show how Jesus planned to use his new found status to help his peers. Why in the world didn't Ms Chew ask Jesus what advice he might like to give to someone Hiv negative or positive that might be reading the article?
Exactly. As in...if he would like to be a spokesperson to youth about HIV, what different sort of approach does he plan to deliver in an effort to get the prevention message heard- since clearly none of what is out there now worked for him.
The article has nothing to do with prevention or awareness. It's about desperation. The desperation of a young man who'll do anything to be a celebrity and the ruthless ambition of an editor who uses his desperation to push magazines (and advertising dollars) at the expense of the young man's future privacy.
Sure enough: If you google Jesus Sanchez + HIV, he comes up immediately. More power to him if he is really ready for that type of exposure. I certainly hope so because it is out there now for good.
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will either of the heartless, greedy harridans who have exploited his diagnosis be around to comfort him or offer any support?
Bucko -- criticising the editorial decisions of POZ magazine is fair game, but impugning the character of two women I consider friends, who are also members of these forums, is crossing way over the line. I know Regan and Sally well, and consider them colleagues in the fight against AIDS. You do not know them. You seem to have one massive chip on your shoulder, and it's making you look very, very small.
Since they are members of the forums, consider yourself warned.
Peter
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off the subject one moment please... thunter34 good pic with the hat but, I really liked the one with you looking down and the shirt off... it reminded me of good times... lol everyone has made such good points on this topic...
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Since they are members of the forums, consider yourself warned.
Wow. They are? I don't think I've ever seen a single post from either one of them. Anyone got links?
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Peter, if we promise to play nice maybe you could extend an invitation to Ms Chew to address the forum regarding her article?
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To clarify somethings...
Attention: I don't lack any.
That's for sure! It's especially telling since YOU started this thread. Spilling beans... girl, you dumped them on the stage. While I certainly appreciate the fact that one can be so open about being gay (it sounds like it's pretty obvious) and HIV+ (not so obvious - yet), some things are lacking from all your posts, while other things are there in (over)abundance.
I don't see you showing a lot of respect or concern for anybody 'cept yourself. You say your friends care so much about you, but what do you do for them? Grace them with your presence? I don't see respect for others. How about this for disrespect:
If you take care of yourself, eat right, workout, and put your health first you can maintain your health and that is exactly what I do.
Come on, do you even read what others post? I'm one of the ones that take care of myself (as do many), work out (as do many), and put my health first (as do most of us), yet we're still suffering from this disease and from the medications that keep us alive. I consider myself very fortunate because I have good insurance coverage, good health, and a great support system, but you wouldn't know that unless you read and paid attention to what I (and others) post. It's certainly not something to appear to be bragging about. I'm not of the 'dooms day' mindset, but a reality check is definitely in order here.
I do see too much of is 'me, me, me, ... I know it all... I'll never... I'm so lucky... It'll never happen to me (it did, though, didn't it?), they'd never leave me, they love me, etc. Where are your peers... guys your age? I assume when you call them 'girls' that they really are girls and not just queeny chicken. Who are you helping when you're not being served?
It wont go to my head.. Thats what its all about breaking the stereotypes!!!
At least you succeeded in this, I suppose. I mean about breaking stereotypes. And that does what for the HIV+ readers of POZ®? Hell, I don't meet the current infection demographics, and yet I'm HIV+. Wow. So not newsworthy.
I don't think I got my points across well... like Brent, I puked a little in my mouth, and it's distracting. Oh, and how about explaining to Tim, one of my favorite people here, why what he said was hateful.
David (who thinks a little humility goes a long way)
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Bucko -- criticising the editorial decisions of POZ magazine is fair game, but impugning the character of two women I consider friends, who are also members of these forums, is crossing way over the line. I know Regan and Sally well, and consider them colleagues in the fight against AIDS. You do not know them. You seem to have one massive chip on your shoulder, and it's making you look very, very small.
Since they are members of the forums, consider yourself warned.
Peter
Peter-
Duly noted.
But what is your take on the cover story?
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Oh, and how about explaining to Tim, one of my favorite people here, why what he said was hateful.
I love you more than ever.
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And yes, I'd like to hear what Sally and Peter- and perhaps even Regan would have to say about the article.
I'd be interested in reading some of Sally and Regan's posts here since I've learned they are members.
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Dear All,
I think a lot of thoughtful observations have been voiced here about the article and about serious HIV issues. There have also been a few unworthy potshots and snappings like Jesse being called a bug chaser, an evaluation for which I don't see any clear evidence. I'll leave that alone now since Peter addressed it directly.
Now Jesse might not even want this kind of intervention on my part, but I'm going to say it anyway. He's a provocative teenager and all that can entail at times.
I would just ask some continued forbearance from members in commenting to or about him. That doesn't mean you shouldn't express something about the magazine or the article if you feel the need to. Just remember Jesse's a 19 year-old-kid, whether he likes being identified that way or not by me.
There are a lot of heavyweights among us here so please consider before launching any (further) missiles.
Thanks for your cooperation,
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[And yes, I'd like to hear what Sally and Peter- and perhaps even Regan would have to say about the article.]
tick tock tick tock
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[And yes, I'd like to hear what Sally and Peter- and perhaps even Regan would have to say about the article.]
tick tock tick tock
You can tick tock away. Given the nature of the dialogue thus far, I've advised them not to reply. I wouldn't wish this thread on my worst enemy. If folks want to do something constructive about POZ's editorial decisions, I'd advise them to send constructive comments to letters@poz.com, where readers submit letters to the editor for possible publication.
Peter
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You can tick tock away. Given the nature of the dialogue thus far, I've advised them not to reply. I wouldn't wish this thread on my worst enemy. If folks want to do something constructive about POZ's editorial decisions, I'd advise them to send constructive comments to letters@poz.com, where readers submit letters to the editor for possible publication.
Peter
Peter,
Perhaps you can advise them to post from time to time. A post asking for input, what effects our lives, what would get US to read the magazine would work wonders. Sample post from POZ® in these forums: "Forum members, we at POZ® are considering doing an article about HIV discrimination in the workplace. We'd like to hear your stories and what you've done to overcome this discrimination." Distancing themselves from the folks they intend to market doesn't benefit anybody, unless POZ® is just a vehicle for drug advertisements in Dr. offices, etc. This isn't meant as a criticism of you or anybody, but a suggestion. I don't want to see myself or letters in print, but would like to see 'our' community served a bit better. Thanks.
David
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You can tick tock away. Given the nature of the dialogue thus far, I've advised them not to reply. I wouldn't wish this thread on my worst enemy.
I have to say I am disappointed that the folks at Poz responsible for writing and publishing this article will not make any statement, given that it has generated so much discussion among your readers. I'd like to avoid controversy too, but I've learned that oftentimes the conversation you don't want to have is the one you need to have. Not that an immediate response is needed, or a prolonged engagement. Just a simple statement on the intent of this article, and their views on readers' reactions.
In the absence of this, I hope that the Poz editors consider and discuss the views that have been expressed here at their next meeting. If not, they are missing out on a valuable source of feedback from their readers. I agree with the point David_NC makes about the folks at Poz distancing themselves from their readers: it doesn't benefit anyone. So I encourage to think about ways to not only solicit more input from your readers, but also provide feedback to them.
If folks want to do something constructive about POZ's editorial decisions, I'd advise them to send constructive comments to letters@poz.com, where readers submit letters to the editor for possible publication.
Done! (Though I still believe that by limiting yourself to letters to the editor, you are missing out on a valuable source of information from your readers. )
Regards,
Henry
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Ok... I read the article and I in my opinion thought it was very superficial...lacking in substance. I definately would not want an individual whose 19 more worried about how he looks to speak in front of my nephew and niece and explain the joys of hiv+ ... whether he's doing that or not its just my perception and opinion... also while Bucko was alittle harsh in words and opinions he was reflecting and critizing the article and made some Valuable Points... enough said... in retropect its called Responsible Journalism... or there lack of... and the Editor of Poz should have caught this.
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I've been doing some chores around the house for the past couple of hours. Those times are often the most productive mentally, for some reason. One thing I was thinking about was this thread and all the comments and criticisms.
I'd like to actually congratulate Jesse on the interview, as I should when anybody accomplishes a personal goal. The main thing I get from all this is that your reality is not my reality which is not anybody else's reality. Jesse does not have much experience with HIV yet... nor do I, for that matter. Perhaps he's not the best candidate for speaking of living with HIV. He is a person that became infected, as will many more his age and younger. He's also relatively inexperienced with life in general. I shouldn't expect him to act completely like an adult, although my impression is that he's a bit too attention oriented to me. Of course, I've had 22 years since I was 19 to mellow out and learn some tact and about life in general. I'm sure that a 19 year old me would possibly get on my 41 year old nerves somewhat.
Yes, I think that an 'experienced' HIV'er would be able to give more insight about living with this virus. Maybe that wasn't the intent of the interview, though. See, lots of people still think that only the really slutty, the junkies, gays, or the truly unfortunate (accidental infections from jobs, etc) are HIV+ or have AIDS. We all know that's not true. Many old timers have grown up with this disease all around them, killing their friends, husbands, wives, children, etc. Many of those more recently infected have been spared the horrors of the early '80's and '90's before HAART or before we even had an understanding how HIV attacked our bodies. In a sense, many are / were sheltered from HIV and AIDS. I know I was.
Those who do become infected at such early ages surely need peers, people close to their age, people they can look up to and respect. This puts a burden on somebody like Jesse. It's up to him to make the best of it. My hopes are that Jesse will make the best of the publicity he's gained from POZ®'s article, and that his newly found 'publicity' will work for him in making a real difference to others.
David
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David, that's a great post! :)
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peter.
I think this has been one of the better threads in a long, long time. It's exactly what this forum is all about...letting us express our opinions. Sure some may have been harsh (although I don't think anyone, including Jonathan or Brent has gone over the line), but, hey, this is a published article. It's out in the open. It's all in the public domain now and if Jessie or Regan or Ms. Chew can't handle it, well, that's their problem. Not ours.
robert
(who finds a lot of other topics in the Off Topics to be far more banal than this one.)
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If it was in the Living With section this thread would have been closed down for sometime ago but for some reason it has stayed opened all day and has been watched like a hawk waiting for its prey. If not for the Members here on this forum this place would flop.
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I have been looking in on this thread off, and on through the course of the day.
I understand and respect each person's point of view.
I went into POZ yesterday after seeing some of the early angst over this piece. I apparently read the wrong article, but I would like have a discussion about it another time too.
This evening, I went into POZ again, and read this story.
I simply found it to be about an exuberant young man who admits his mistakes, and has tried to form a positive attitude about his infection, and what a couple of his longer term thoughts are. Granted, he is very young, and will likely have some rough experiences at some point, but if I were 19 again, and had done the stuff he has, I would be pretty gushy about my experience too.
His story deserves just as much care and attention as any of ours does. Give the kid a break.
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Well I have to say David and Lisa did make a good point...
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The elephant in the room:
I sincerely doubt that such a furor over this cover would have been created if our cover-boy (a) had not already endeared himself, even before we learned about the cover-story, so greatly to the participants here with his witty and helpful postings to the point that Peter Staley himself issued a warning (although he now defends him), and (b) said cover-boy had not called everyone's attention to the cover and the story in such a humble and self-deprecating manner.
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The Golden Peanut Award for edfu.
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One man, one article, one time. There is no one face of this disease. We've all made our mistakes, we all pay the price. Regardless it took courage to do what he did. Do I agree with all he says, no. But I admire him for stepping forward.
Edited for seplling
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Thank you for that comment Edfu.
I have long thought that the tone of this thread is directly related to comments like the one in post #3. It set a negative and unprovoked tone. Why the author of a thread would do this to his own thread and to himself I will never understand.
Given posts #44, #59, #66, #67, I can not help but feel like #3 was some sort of taunt, baiting, or attempt to stir up drama in order to draw more attention to this thread and thusly get more publicity.
My head has been reeling for days, and have done the best I can to be a consummate member and poster.
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The elephant in the room:
I sincerely doubt that such a furor over this cover would have been created if our cover-boy (a) had not already endeared himself, even before we learned about the cover-story, so greatly to the participants here with his witty and helpful postings to the point that Peter Staley himself issued a warning (although he now defends him), and (b) said cover-boy had not called everyone's attention to the cover and the story in such a humble and self-deprecating manner.
Agreed. But I think the issue has been raised and for all of us who have pointed the finger, I am wondering what we will do next? I pray that it won't be to simply become bored with this issue but I fear that is a probablity for most.
I'm still trying to figure out what is the right step to take next and I think that it would help to have some input or a sign of willingness to hear our input from POZ about this, but their responsiveness to this situation can't effect what I need to do for my own conscious on this...just honestly not entirely certain what is the best thing to do.
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So problematic...
-Haineux-
Let's not forget this one above: post 73. (Which still hasn't been explained or apologized for)
or this: 107
Need is a powerful word....
when i pointed out that i still needed an answer explaining it.
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God, I love this board for this reason - it makes me think.
I actually picked up Poz tonight for the first time (it was free in one of the bars) and read the article. I didn't love/hate the article but I thought immediately of Pedro from the Real World San Francisco.
Now before you all crucify me for making the comparison - here was my thinking. Pedro was the FIRST person I "knew" with HIV - as a sexually confused 17 year old. He put a face to this horrible disease and I have a special place in my heart for him.
Since then, I don't think there has been an HIV positive person on a reality program. I immediately thought Jessie could be that guy to some young kids.
I hope that Jessie uses this opportunity to be like Pedro.
Pete
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Your right Tim. I had not forgotten about that either.
He has baited several times, but then doesn't respond when questioned.
And then there is always that little "go back and edit" feature which I have noticed has been used a few times but still does not address the questions posed.
I said it once, and say it again, "It's easier to get your hands dirty than it is to get them clean".
He created this whole mess with post #3. It was an intentional, willfull act, and I have decided that I will not pity him that this thread was not one of high-5's and jubilation--as it should have been for someone that was wanting others to share in their accomplishment/pride/etc.
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Jeu du jour... toc toc... c'est toi.
Here there be irony, so please read this in an appropriately sarcastic tone of voice. Because my tongue is planted firmly in cheek as I write this.
You know, four months after my diagnosis, I was decked out in Les Hommes, Miu Miu, and Marc Jacobs doing blow with Aiden Shaw in the VIP areas of clubs in Manhattan and getting my picture put up on lastnightsparty.com, and POZ didn't do a cover story on me. I have no clue why they didn't. I could have gone into great detail about the travails of not getting my AIDS blood on my friend's straw and triumphing over the small minds of the New York downtown crowd or about how HIV meant that I got tired more quickly and would pass out waiting for the F train at 5 in the morning or the frustration of having to put on a condom while having sex with my star friends in a limousine... but it would appear that at the time, they chose to focus on something that was not me and therefore much more dull.
Tongue removed now.
I think a whole bunch of people symbiotically fed off of each other to produce this journalistic bit of Wonderbread.
Hmm... overall, I found the breathless, worshipful tone of the article rather irritating and condescending to the audience and the subject. It was like something Hello magazine would write about some well-off fashionable 60s icon today. Nothing substantial or interesting per se... just sort of cupcake-ish and sickly sweet.
"One of a coterie of beautiful straight girls?"
"Ever since seventh grade, Jesse Sanchez has been given a hard time—on the street, at school—for being gay and so absolutely beautiful."
Who writes like this?
"If I had to say something bad about him, it's that he's too beautiful and has too many beautiful straight women around him."
If I had the time, I suppose I could delve into the psychological pathos that goes into celebrating this sort of thing. Nothing against Jesus personally, I'm sure we would be miles apart if we ever met in person and would nothing in common. But even if I wasn't quite so outre at 19, I do remember getting similarly excited about art movements and film theory, so to each his own and all that.
But what I do object to is the way that adults who are supposed to know better pass on what they know to be some wretchedly excessive Americanized, cliched expressions of what it means to be HIV+... and expect my ass to swallow it.
Of course, maybe one could look at someone who says "I need guys to like me" and maybe read it as a sign of deep cultural pathos. Maybe that gay American culture feeds a bunch of cliched nonsense to insecure and physically attractive teenagers, and they could maybe then extrapolate through some sociological reasoning why someone in his position caught HIV.
I mean, really... it's not normal for 19 year olds to have sex with 30 year old men! Am I the only one who thinks there's something inherently fucked up about it?
But I guess not for Poz, who finds nothing wrong with having such a blatant desire to please people that you'll put yourself at risk for a deadly disease. Nope, nothing wrong with our society here, citizens. He's still pretty, so go back to your lives.
Fortunately, our massively disturbing admission is blown off with this. "Whatever his longings for male attention, it was to women that Sanchez turned for help."
Awesome.
“I want to look perfect,” he says. “I want to be perfect.” And that’s a wrap.
Nothing wrong with that either.
Shit like this should be said to a therapist and not a reporter, I don't care how old you are.
But exploitation is the name of the game, I guess. But unless I miss my guess, both Poz and Jesus seem to have managed to exploit each other, so no real harm done, I suppose.
Oh, and shit like this causes AIDS. No need to scare the living crap out of people, now I guess we just lay back and accept that they'll get it... so we might as well tell them how to look good doing it.
Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot.
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I, too, would wish that our cover boy could be like the beautiful (in more ways than one) Pedro Zamora. Pedro, however, would never have posted about approving of vanity with umpteen photos, which, I believe, was our cover boy's 3rd posting on this site. I don't think young kids would relate to that (not that there's anything wrong with it).
"Cruelty was the vice of the ancient; vanity is that of the modern world. Vanity is the last disease."--George Moore
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brilliant benj, and spot on. that is what i have been saying all fucking day.
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Please Please Please dont think I am comparing Jessie and Pedro as people - but more about the sensation is has caused/is causing
I dont mean ANY disrespect to Jessie because he is a brave guy and has his flaws but so do we all so back the fuck off.
Pete (who wishes Pedro was here so I could thank him)
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i can't get your link to work, edfu. what am i missing?
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Queen does raise a very interesting point: just how does somone get on the cover and the subject of an interview that damn fast? He said he became positive in February of this year...and he says this article has been in the works since April of this year. That's two measly months from diagnosis to cover. Wow.
Thunter Bunny, I guess hell will freeze over before we get an answer to my well made point. In my post, I said why I thought it was and by no response I guess it must be true. Like the cliche says, Money talks and bullshit walks. To me the shit is so deep I need to put some boots on, maybe I can borrow the ones that Jesse says is sooooooo last season..... ;)
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thunter, what you're missing is what I'm missing: the computer ability to get the link to work. Sorry. I'm not up to snuff on computer ability, being an old fart. I've modified my post. If you missed this glorious photographic display, just go to p. 2 of his earliest posts, and look for his third entry.
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I said I would shut up but I won't.
Seriously what is the point of this conversation if after 172 replies, warnings to well established members, POZ magazine won't even step up and help explain what everybody here believe is a snafu?
I think it's been very clear and accepted from everyone that Jesse has been used by POZ magazine. Now i'm waiting for the answer from the editor to help us understand what we missed.
Milker.
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thunter, what you're missing is what I'm missing: the computer ability to get the link to work. Sorry. I'm not up to snuff on computer ability, being an old fart. I've modified my post. If you missed this glorious photographic display, just go to p. 2 of his earliest posts, and look for his third entry.
oh, wait.
ed, i put 2+2 together and figured out what you're linking.
i'm not missing anything.
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To me, (i'm assuming) Jesse is just being Jesse.
However....
I would love to agree with you wholeheartedly, Tim, except for one thing:
Regan Hoffman didn't find Jessie while she was trolling through the pages of Manhunt.net. It's never been properly explained to me how an unknown 19-year-old kid lands on the cover of a national magazine. It's not like he's ever done anything more fabulous than create a nifty MySpace page (which, BTW, is not out-poz, not that I'd expect it to be). Somehow the machinations of a celebrity wanna-be met with the shrewd calculations of a professional AIDS-careerist and shiller for Big Pharma. It's a match made on E! Television.
This is the part I don't get either....and, to me, is the far more interesting story....
John
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Jesse has been called arrogant and naive again and again by the cynical mob, and has kept up a friendly demeanor in response. So who here has the more open mind to how others perceive things? Who here actually sounds arrogant with their one-size-fits-all-dying-from-HIV party line -- stick to it, or find some other forums!
Trust me, Jesse rubbed me the wrong way right from the get-go, but I admire any 19 year old that publically discloses their HIV status, especially THIS publically. Sure, he's naive, but at least he's not cynical and nasty yet. At least his mind seems to be open to the remarkable spectrum of all our experiences, living with HIV.
Peter
Peter,
I cannot believe you authored and posted these words. It simply proves that JK, many others, and I were not wrong in our assessment of the new more sanitized forums. aka "POZ POLISH"!
My dog just pissed on the cover, so now I don't have to read more POZ denials of the truth of HIV/AIDS.
JESSE, HIV/AIDS IS A FATAL DISEASE, PERIOD! HOW YOU DEAL WITH IT AND HOW WELL YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM IS CONSTRUCTED AT THE RIPE OLD AGE OF 19 WILL BE THE SOLE DETERMINATION OF HOW WELL YOU WILL SURVIVE FOR THE NEXT 20, 30, OR 40 YEARS...... AND THAT'S THE TRUTH!!!!
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There does seem to be a bit missing from this story and whoever wrote this story does not fill us in.
All I got from the story is that a 19 year old called Jesus has caught HIV and is having a faba-daba-doo time of it.
I'm glad to hear that. Now I can go on with life, enriched with a greater understanding of the world of HIV.
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I said I would shut up but I won't.
Seriously what is the point of this conversation if after 172 replies, warnings to well established members, POZ magazine won't even step up and help explain what everybody here believe is a snafu?
I think it's been very clear and accepted from everyone that Jesse has been used by POZ magazine. Now i'm waiting for the answer from the editor to help us understand what we missed.
Milker.
"EVERYONE"? ??? ??? LOL, no. "Very clear?" Again, no.
Now i'm waiting for the answer from the editor
LOL, you make it sound like a sure thing. As Mick would say "You can't always get what you want"
(http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l153/aycm8620/fingerwag.jpg)
Deal with it.
I didn't find the article offensive.
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Deal with it.
I didn't find the article offensive.
I didn't find the article offensive either. I did find it alarming and shameful though.
I think what you might be missing from some of the uproar are two things:
The first is the question of what was a 19 year old who was only 6 months poz (and according to Jesse's version - only one month poz when the story began to be worked on) doing as a cover story for a national magazine? How did that come about? What is the rational for that? That has not been explained either in the magazine or on this board.
I am in full agreement that there needs to be articles and profiles detailing why those who are so young still continue to become poz, and I think we need to have articles about what happens to those who are newly diagnosed and how they do deal. But with those types of stories come a responsibility from the editors and publishers of the magazine to how that information is presented - both to their young and HIV naive subjects, and to their readership in general. In both case’ I think Poz failed
I don't see how they really served Jesse or his story by doing the article in such a way that allowed his most superficial side to not just be reported but glorified.
This wasn’t straight reporting of the natural shallowness and sense of invincibility of youth with an explanation of the danger that entails for understanding the real risks of HIV. I would have welcomed that and applauded that. No, this was just allowing someone who has stated himself how much he needs attention, and desires to be in the public eye a platform to just expose themselves without any editorial insight of what the ramifications of that may be.
I also want to be clear that when I say things about shallowness, superficiality and naivety that these are not attacks on Jesse but my reactions to the very picture painted by the writer of the article and further prioof of what was so wrong about it.
The other issue is that of the responsibility to the readership. POZ bills itself as being a sort of publication of record that chronicles the HIV epidemic – with that sort of mission - one would think there would be a conscientious effort to avoid hyperbole, myths and misperceptions about HIV.
Nowhere in this article did I see any editorial decision to discuss or probe into issues of what HIV is to the younger population or the context of Jesse’s statements and attitude with the reality of being POZ. Also before anyone argues that a profile need not include editorial direction – I suggest they consider the context of the publication and I remind them of the responsibility to their mission.
I can not see any beneficial education effects about HIV prevention or the newly diagnosed dealing with infection from an article that talks more about how HIV is not an issue in one’s life. This is not to say that all infection stories need to be morose or gloomy – hell – this isn’t to say that any need be, but you can not educate on risks or connect with others who face those risks by dismissing the ramifications of those risks.
I guess to explain my point, I ask you and any who have read the article and have asked, “What is the big deal?” to consider your question in a different context.
I submit that your very question itself is the big deal.
Why for an article that seem to cover no big deal or substantial story given a cover as the face of youth with HIV and newly diagnosed?
Why is POZ using what appears to be an article missing a second half as a front to the world as this is what it is like to be newly diagnosed, poz and young?
And if it means to be newly diagnosed, poz and young is in fact “No Big Deal” and that is what the editors of POZ want the world to know, then I suggest we better get ready for this board to get crowded with many more Jesse’s and that is something we will all have to deal with.
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Can someone summarize this for me? I swear Dolce is about the most tired label to wear. At least go Belgian minimalist and out-elite the elitists, or at least that's what I do.
Wait... this is about POZ mag? WHAT
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::returns to watching brazilian porn::
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I didn't find the article offensive either. I did find it alarming and shameful though.
I think what you might be missing from some of the uproar are two things:
The first is the question of what was a 19 year old who was only 6 months poz (and according to Jesse's version - only one month poz when the story began to be worked on) doing as a cover story for a national magazine? How did that come about? What is the rational for that? That has not been explained either in the magazine or on this board.
I am in full agreement that there needs to be articles and profiles detailing why those who are so young still continue to become poz, and I think we need to have articles about what happens to those who are newly diagnosed and how they do deal. But with those types of stories come a responsibility from the editors and publishers of the magazine to how that information is presented - both to their young and HIV naive subjects, and to their readership in general. In both case’ I think Poz failed
I don't see how they really served Jesse or his story by doing the article in such a way that allowed his most superficial side to not just be reported but glorified.
This wasn’t straight reporting of the natural shallowness and sense of invincibility of youth with an explanation of the danger that entails for understanding the real risks of HIV. I would have welcomed that and applauded that. No, this was just allowing someone who has stated himself how much he needs attention, and desires to be in the public eye a platform to just expose themselves without any editorial insight of what the ramifications of that may be.
I also want to be clear that when I say things about shallowness, superficiality and naivety that these are not attacks on Jesse but my reactions to the very picture painted by the writer of the article and further prioof of what was so wrong about it.
The other issue is that of the responsibility to the readership. POZ bills itself as being a sort of publication of record that chronicles the HIV epidemic – with that sort of mission - one would think there would be a conscientious effort to avoid hyperbole, myths and misperceptions about HIV.
Nowhere in this article did I see any editorial decision to discuss or probe into issues of what HIV is to the younger population or the context of Jesse’s statements and attitude with the reality of being POZ. Also before anyone argues that a profile need not include editorial direction – I suggest they consider the context of the publication and I remind them of the responsibility to their mission.
I can not see any beneficial education effects about HIV prevention or the newly diagnosed dealing with infection from an article that talks more about how HIV is not an issue in one’s life. This is not to say that all infection stories need to be morose or gloomy – hell – this isn’t to say that any need be, but you can not educate on risks or connect with others who face those risks by dismissing the ramifications of those risks.
I guess to explain my point, I ask you and any who have read the article and have asked, “What is the big deal?” to consider your question in a different context.
I submit that your very question itself is the big deal.
Why for an article that seem to cover no big deal or substantial story given a cover as the face of youth with HIV and newly diagnosed?
Why is POZ using what appears to be an article missing a second half as a front to the world as this is what it is like to be newly diagnosed, poz and young?
And if it means to be newly diagnosed, poz and young is in fact “No Big Deal” and that is what the editors of POZ want the world to know, then I suggest we better get ready for this board to get crowded with many more Jesse’s and that is something we will all have to deal with.
I agree completely with Iggy's assessment of the damage caused and, finally, why this whole thing is tragic beyond what I still feel is the exploitation of someone not entirely aware of how the consequences such a decision made now will effect his future.
I never thought I'd reach such levels of cynicism, but I guess I have, and it's deeply troubling.
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"EVERYONE"? ??? ??? LOL, no. "Very clear?" Again, no.
LOL, you make it sound like a sure thing. As Mick would say "You can't always get what you want"
Deal with it.
I didn't find the article offensive.
I never said I found the article offensive. Maybe not everyone thinks that Jesse's been "used". Yourself said that you would "raise an eyebrow" if there was no follow-up.
I'm just a bit "surprised" that POZ editors won't come in the forums to give their point of view on this article, since it seems that "most" forums members have a serious issue with it. That Peter hinted that they shouldn't reply on that particular thread is fine, they could start another thread or, if they are afraid of the "wrath" of the aidsmeds members, they could maybe make a public reply by form of a letter, or something. Their current silence is bothering me, but hey i'm easily bothered. And that makes me feel like there is a separation between POZ and Aidmeds (owned by POZ I believe), like we're the bad crowd on the side and POZ staff won't talk to us. It's not like we're reacting on an article from a magazine that has nothing to do with aidsmeds.
Milker.
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I never said I found the article offensive. Maybe not everyone thinks that Jesse's been "used". Yourself said that you would "raise an eyebrow" if there was no follow-up.
I'm just a bit "surprised" that POZ editors won't come in the forums to give their point of view on this article, since it seems that "most" forums members have a serious issue with it. That Peter hinted that they shouldn't reply on that particular thread is fine, they could start another thread or, if they are afraid of the "wrath" of the aidsmeds members, they could maybe make a public reply by form of a letter, or something. Their current silence is bothering me, but hey i'm easily bothered. And that makes me feel like there is a separation between POZ and Aidmeds (owned by POZ I believe), like we're the bad crowd on the side and POZ staff won't talk to us. It's not like we're reacting on an article from a magazine that has nothing to do with aidsmeds.
Milker.
This doesn't prevent them from invoking their privilege as members to not be named or harshly criticized by other members. Non-members (including political figures, sports stars and celebrities) are routinely savaged here with no interdiction from the administration or moderators.
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We're not the ones signing the paychecks.
Well...we are...indirectly...but what are we going to do? Write a letter to Bristol-Myers Squibb, or Gilead, or Merck, and complain about the content, and threaten to boycott their products?
har.
;)
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Thank you Iggy!
Page 1,2,3-- Bristol Myers Squib and Gilead
Page 6&7 -- Serono Inc.
Page 9, 10, 11, 12 -- Boenringer Ingelheim
Page 16, 17 --Glaxo Smith Klein
Page 19, 20 -- Bristol - Myers Squib
Centerfold -- Glazo Smith Klein
Page 29 -- Gilead
Back Cover -- Sell Your Life Insurance.
I dare say that the content of POZ in the last many years is really no surprise when the income is flowing from the above list of stellar governmental lobby. Unfortunately what most don't realize is the foreign roots of the above listed corporate giants.
I dare say that a cleansing of the marketing and advertising departments of Smart + Strong might be able to get creative and solicit a different list of advertisers which include many giants that would be more than happy to support this publication. Names like Eastman Kodak, Subaru, Ford, General Motors, Suzuki, Honda, Wal Mart, and many others who would be glad to advertise to the readership of this magazine, but alas, immagination is not only lacking, but rare in this day.
In SHOCK and AWE!
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>:(
You know I happened across this site last night and that, of course, drove me to read the article to see what all this fuss and crucification was about and find answers as to why experienced and supposedly grown up people were standing in line to whip the Hell out of this guy. It is not his fault that he does not share in your bitter. twisted and jaded views on the world, life and life with HIV. No, he hasn't seen the darkside like some of us have and fortunately with the med regimines that are available to us today, probably will not.
What he did was put his journalistic future on the line. Attention seeking or not, he is giving a positive and affirmative voice to any and all of his generation that may become infected. Letting them know, it is not a reason to hide in the shadows, sit and cry and do the whole "whoah is me" routine, or to give up on the future (as many of us did when we were diagnosed because in our day it was considered to be a death sentance).
Bug Chaser?
Then what were you?
Let's be honest about the situation. I was diagnosed in 1986 with G.R.I.D. If any of you can remember back that far, the people going into the bars back then wearing safety pins in their clothing to symbolize safe sex were the ones being laughed and scoffed at.
So, if you became poz after say 1988, were you "bug chasing"? Probably not and I would never lower myself to your level by stating that you were. But by 1988, the world was largely aware of HIV and people were still getting infected then, the same as they are now.
Only now it is not nearly as stupid a move since it is, for the most part, a managable diesease, along the same lines of diabetes. You don't keep it in check, it will kill you.
So why point fingers. Aren't there enough people out there ready to crucify us for our illness or lifestyle that we have to compound issues by doing it within our own community. Grow the Hell up, he is 19, most of you are 30 plus, act like it.
How many of you placed your career in jeopardy for the sake of bringing hope to others outside of your own miserable lives? How many of you stood proud within months of being diagnosed and said "Here I am world, I am poz and you know what, it's not over" let alone did it on a national level. Let us not forget, there is no turning back for him. How many of you have or ever had that kind of dedication to anything?
I did. I was put throuogh Hell for it. I had the word AIDS burned into the front lawn of my apartment building in 1987. Did I move? Hell no. I had condoms crazy glued all over my Firebird in 1988. I was humiliated and thrown out of doctors' and dentists' offices and fired from my job in 1990. I was crucified on AOL from 1995 through 2001 for having HIV POZ as the first line in profile. Did I stumble, fall or go private about my status? No. Why? Not for any other reason than to let those around me who hadn't died know that this was not something to be ashamed of.
I find it very disheartening to read the comments and views being posted in relation to this artcle. To read people judging the whole of one man's being based on a few paragraph's in a magazine that was designed to bring our ailling community together. How would you feel if I were to grab a few randoms statements made in your lifetime and used those as a measure of your entire being? Wouldn't be fair would it. Let's face it, we're all Poz here so we all, pretty much, have some sort of skeletons in our respective closets, don't we? Some more than others, I assure you. From my experience it is usually the ones talking the loudest that have the most.
So, what if Poz did an article about me? I beat AIDS! I really beat AIDS. I am stronger for it.
I had spent the predominant part of 2003 and 2004 in the hospital with zero t-cells and viral loads of over 347,000 until I was told they needed the bed and there really was nothing more that could be done for me so it was a hospice or home. I just spent from 2004 through June of 2006 in a bed without so much as the energy to get to a bathroom expecting to die. I was at peace with it. There were a lot of things I had not accomplished to the level I would have liked. But, I released an album, I had a hit overseas and I had real love three times within my life, I was a psuedo celebrity. I did a lot. So I came home to die. Low and behold, thanks to Fuzion, I remain here and I am out to accomplish everything I laid in that bed lamenting upon. So, what are you gonna crucify me if I were to get on the cover of Poz citing that I am a publicity hound trying to mark up a few record sales or land a contract or further my graphic art business. Knock yourselves out. Because when people like me read that type of rhetoric, it is not the subject of it that looks debased, it is the people that are supposed to be enlightened, experienced and aged that are writing it that do.
So, if you are going blast him, blast me. Because like him, I always have and always will celebrate my life and my life as an HIV positive individual and I sincerely hope your bitter tones do not sully his mood or change his standing on the subject for a single second. You should all be ashamed of yourselves (those who have taken a negative stance on this issue) for even trying to cause him to falter. He is a vibrant and, from what I read, level-headed guy who is going to do the same as I did and that is not give in to this diseases or let this disease dictate or manage his life. He is treating it with the proper regard with which it should be dealt. He will dictate and manage his disease while moving forward with a proud voice, a radiant smile and a resiliant personality.
Hats off to you, Jesse! No one outside of those who know you personally could be more proud of you than I.
Highest regards to all and I wish you all the best in health and happiness.
Peace and Cheers!
AJ Evans
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Let's be honest about the situation. I was diagnosed in 1986 with G.R.I.D.
Cuteguyplus, it's funny that you were diagnosised with G.R.I.D. in 1986, when the name had been changed in 1983 to human immunodeficiency virus (HIV).
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Bug Chaser?
Then what were you?
No.
I'm a spider killer
bry :)
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tHEN BLAME MY DOCTOR, NOT ME. BUT SEE, i GUESS YOU ARE JUST ONE OF THOSE GUY THAT HAS TO PICK AND PICK AND PICK. YOU TOTALLY LOST THE POINT OF THE MESSAGE AND THERE YOU HAVE HAVE IT. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MEET THE SMALLEST MIND ON THE NET.
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AJ,
I agree with your distaste of what seems to be attacks on Jesse personally, but I don't think you make a very good point about maturity and rhetoric unless you hope to do so by irony.
I will disclose right up front that I have some distrust to what you write as you said that you just happened to find this board last night and this is how you introduce yourself. It seems rather quick of you to make such sweeping judgements and finger pointing as well in one post.
My understanding of the bug chasing accusation BTW has more to do with previous posts of Jesse's (including ones I understand he deleted) than the article itself. I don't necessarily agree with it, but I will say that it provided me enough reason to not state that it was a baseless accusation, I ask you to be careful of your snap judgement in this area as well.
Your description of how HIV is a manageable disease like diabetes and then the details of your own physical suffering of from it did cause me to wonder if you realize that you are disproving your own statements. And it is these statements that I want to now focus on - the mentality that HIV is just something like diabetes and no big deal goes to the very heart of my concern about this article.
Regardless of how well you are doing now - not everyone is and you weren't always so, and in all likelihood you will have some other future complication which may or may not be as serious as what you have already experienced.
I agree that morbidity is not a good way to get people to listen and learn, but I hope you recognize that neither is sugar - which may go down easier but usually burns away much more quickly with anything to remember about it.
While I agree that there is a disconnect between what many who were first diagnosed with HIV have gone through and what those diagnosed today will go through, I find a more alarmingly disconnect intimated by the article that the newly diagnosed biggest worries about the future is to master Gloria Gaynor and have a good outlook....and again this is an article in the National magzine of record for Poz people. I hope you keep that thought in context.
With you background and your history - I do welcome you to the boards and I hope to hear more from you - but I do warn you that while I personally respect your opinion - I don't agree with most of your assessment of this situation and our members.
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LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MEET THE SMALLEST MIND ON THE NET.
Accusation or Introduction?
It was a valid question of Rapidrod's, and I assure you that you will face many more. If you wish to have your point understood I suggest you respond to them without the attacks.
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tHEN BLAME MY DOCTOR, NOT ME. BUT SEE, i GUESS YOU ARE JUST ONE OF THOSE GUY THAT HAS TO PICK AND PICK AND PICK. YOU TOTALLY LOST THE POINT OF THE MESSAGE AND THERE YOU HAVE HAVE IT. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MEET THE SMALLEST MIND ON THE NET.
This is hauntingly familiar . . .
MtD
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I appreciate and fully comprehend your reply. I don't believe I did anything by irony, I did not make accusations or anything of the sort, but if people feel so inclined to think themselves as part of that group, it only furthers my statement. What I did was really ask questions on motives and try to make people see things from an objective point of view and point out some of my history. We are a community. Do we choose to act like the Harper Valley PTA or can we all just get along without the stakes of fire?
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Maybe you can set this thread to music AJ. ;)
MtD
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tHEN BLAME MY DOCTOR, NOT ME. BUT SEE, i GUESS YOU ARE JUST ONE OF THOSE GUY THAT HAS TO PICK AND PICK AND PICK. YOU TOTALLY LOST THE POINT OF THE MESSAGE AND THERE YOU HAVE HAVE IT. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MEET THE SMALLEST MIND ON THE NET.
AJ
For someone who has just found this site and has only posted Twice I think it only fair to tell you that we do not slam others for voicing their opinions..name calling is not tolerated, if you want to continue posting them please do so in a respectable manner..or at least get to know the other members before yelling at them...using capital letter is considered shouting and there is no need to shout at anyone here...you want people to listen to you then drop the name calling and sarcasm.
Jan
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Where did I slam anyone? The smallest mind on the net? Well, let's look at it. You say we don't slam others. Yet, that is precisely why I chose to enter this discussion because the slamming (bad terminology in this day of crystal meth usage, by the way) of poor Jesse. As far as the caps, that was a mistake. Forgive me for hitting the wrong button, although I am finding that forgiveness is not something that is given out in generous portions here. Are you gonna slam me now too?
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The smallest mind on the net was in response to all the content on my post, that was what he focused on. What kind of statement is that?
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AJ
First of all I know nothing about Crystal meth or the termanology used in regarding to Crystal Meth...but rather than hijack this thread please feel free to PM me if you want me to explain my post further.
Thanks you
Jan
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No.
I'm a spider killer
bry :)
FABULOUS! I LOVE YOU!
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;D yay for love!
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It is not his fault that he does not share in your bitter. twisted and jaded views on the world, life and life with HIV. No, he hasn't seen the darkside like some of us have and fortunately with the med regimines that are available to us today, probably will not.
Last week I went to Exmoor, and took some people up on the moor, stunning it was but tough walking, technically it's a mountain, Malsmead Hill, was sunny but the mist cam down, wet, 0 visibility, tough walking, needed to get the compass out, n at one point we were walking blind up to our ankles in bog, but we got home and back to the sunshine down the hill okay. Tough, real, but not bitter or twisted.
I am a HIV realist and an optimist, I am a treatment optimist, but 30% of people starting Atripla/Sustiva will get side effects that interfere with their daily work/life/head, and even thoughone of the best treatments going, also one of the most troublesome and discontinued.
19 is an age not a generation. I personally believe JS knows what he's doing, he's a media natural, but this thread ain't kinda about him anymore. This thread has been a craic read. But, I am now offended by association re: bitter and twisted. Even though this remark was not directed at me, its name calling and out of order.
HIV is like Niagara Falls, while you's boating in the water at the top, th spray is beautiful but if you go over the edge, there's no way back.
- matt
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You're missing the point AJ. We're not criticizing Jesse. Hell, he's a 19 year old kid. Our problem is with the editorial work (or lack of?) on the part of POZ magazine.
I wish Jesse nothing but a long and successful life in whatever he chooses to do.
I think the article made some negative reinforcements, and that disturbs me.
(such as the 'innocent victim, no responsibility' thing)
Alan
PS - be respectful when typing anything to Jan. Period.
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Jan and I have spoken privately and are in total agreement with a lot of issues. I think it awesome for you to come to her defense, but trust me when i say, the need is no longer existant.
Peace
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Peace to you as well, AJ.
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tHEN BLAME MY DOCTOR, NOT ME. BUT SEE, i GUESS YOU ARE JUST ONE OF THOSE GUY THAT HAS TO PICK AND PICK AND PICK. YOU TOTALLY LOST THE POINT OF THE MESSAGE AND THERE YOU HAVE HAVE IT. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MEET THE SMALLEST MIND ON THE NET.
AJ -- welcome to our forums. I'm the founder of this site, and Jan (anniebc) is one of our forum moderators, along with Tim Horn, Andy Velez, and Ann (username "Ann"). You've found the busiest (and I think best) HIV-related forums on the web, and the primary reason for their popularity is the safe place we try to create here by using some heavy-handed moderation. You'll learn the ropes pretty quickly, but you won't last long if you start trying to argue with a moderator after they've warned you about something you've posted.
Besides the use of all caps, telling another member that he has "the smallest mind on the net" is a personal insult, period, and we don't allow those here. You will notice that the member who called Jesse a bugchaser was also warned. If he had engaged in an argument with me about the warning, I would have given him a Time-Out. Please read our Time-Out Policy here (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=277.msg74745#msg74745).
Peter Staley
Founder
AIDSmeds.com
P.S. I actually agreed with most of what you said in your first post, but let's just keep this about the issues being discussed, and try our best not to launch into personal attacks or name-calling.
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Poor Jesse?!? Give me a break...... ::)
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..I dare say that a cleansing of the marketing and advertising departments of Smart + Strong might be able to get creative and solicit a different list of advertisers which include many giants that would be more than happy to support this publication. Names like Eastman Kodak, Subaru, Ford, General Motors, Suzuki, Honda, Wal Mart, and many others who would be glad to advertise to the readership of this magazine, but alas, immagination is not only lacking, but rare in this day.
In SHOCK and AWE!
Given the amount of times posters have intimated to newbies that HIV will bankrupt you, rob you of your health, livelihood and kill you, its hardly surprising that the corporations you mention wouldn't view poz folks as a desirable demographic. On the other hand for companies peddling HIV meds its a perfectly targetted publication.
(Spoken strictly as a marketing professional :))
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NEVER WILL I BE so hateful and so "bitchy" towards anyone!!!! So don't worry about me ever becoming cynical or nasty! I would never criticize anyones life or way of being!
In the article you were quoted as saying “I’m not the butchest thing ever, but [at least] I’m not a flamer,” says Sanchez." The flamer comment, to me, is a criticism of someone's life or way of being as if it is a bad thing. Whether or not you actually feel that way, it was a poor comment to make and an even poorer decision for the magazine to publish which essentially equates very feminine gay males as a very bad thing to be.
I found this one of the most disturbing things of all in the article, besides it being void of any depth, and the moderators posts here that this, and poz, are an inclusive environment when clearly it is not by their chastisements when their magazine encourages the exact same thing they are chastizing..
How would I feel if I were a very effeminate 'flamer' reading that article? Probably like I didn't fit in anywhere, not even in a group that should accept everyone.
My friends are valuable to me and if my story can spread awareness in the teen community, I have reached my goal.
Sadly, I doubt many negative teenagers read poz magazine. (ps peter: POZ is still not in the dictionary here)
Another person in this thread posted "if he's HIV+, his story is as truthful as a 20 years survivor who's been to death's door. "
To which I would normally agree, except for the fact that his story is limited to being pretty, having sex without a condom and getting HIV (with a new car every year). He hasn't 'done' anything.
Somehow, to me, that 'story' isn't worthy of a front page cover when there are people out there who actually are doing something and 'deserve' a spotlight. When i do read the magazine, I look for inspiring stories. Not a puff piece on a guy who's sole claim to fame for being on the cover is that he fucked without a condom.
His goals haven’t changed, though. “I want to look perfect,” he says. “I want to be perfect.” And that’s a wrap.
Those are quite some goals.
As another member said " I don't see how they really served Jesse or his story by doing the article in such a way that allowed his most superficial side to not just be reported but glorified. "
If you want to be an activist a good place to come out would have been in your post about hiv on your myspace. The post is quoted below
August 12, 2007 - Sunday
What do I have to say about HIV/AIDS....
Current mood: restless
As a gay teenager I have to say that HIV has blemished my world. Being gay is hard as it is, but now we (as in gay males) have to fight off the stigma that all gays have the little bugger. It's a view that numerous people share, and with time it has diminished, but with the current rise of HIV in teenagers and young adults people are beginning to adapt the view that once seemed to be coming to an end.
At one point HIV cases seemed to decrease. The work of many advocates/activist was getting across to young American. Both straight and gay were taking precautions to lessen their risk of contracting the seed we so uncontrollably fear. In recent happenings it seems that the work of all those who are taking a stand against this epidemic has been flushed down the toilet. I still see a lot of awareness signs up and around the city, and much information is offered about the virus. Yet a lot of people continue to ignore it. I understand that in Miami a lot of the city is still influenced by the Latin view that if you don't talk about it everything is ok. Still that view is diminishing and soon HIV will be something to talk over the dinner table as we pass the arroz con frijoles.
The problem lies in the fact that HIV is somewhat being accepted… which don't get me wrong is good, but it's being accepted to graciously. It has become such a treatable disease that a lot of people are not worried about it. Well those who are informed are not worried because they feel that there is enough information and treatment out there to keep them alive. Then we have the other end of the spectrum; those who are not informed and are scared of it but relinquish to having unprotected sex because of the feeling, psychological affect, and because they want to show intimacy to their partner. I just sit here sometimes and wonder, "Wow, how difficult could this get?"
Yes, HIV is a chronic disease. You take your pill once a day (for most people its once a day) and you move along like normal. I mean some people don't need pills for years or ever because their bodies do a great job at fighting that virus. Everyone is different and that is what people need to understand. Everybody has a different immune system and each person will have a different reaction.
The scariest part about this epidemic is the underground guys/girls who continue to spread the virus. It's absolutely inhumane and heartless but it happens. There are guys out there who continue to pass on the virus and consider themselves, "the seed givers". If a guy ever told me, "I am going to give you my seed," I would probably be like, "Your disgusting, get off of me, and get a life scum bag". I personally never have had a problem dating a positive guy. I haven't knowingly had sex with a positive guy, but I have kissed, made out, and have gone to second base with a positive guy. I mean in today's world it's inevitable! If you have had more than 10 sexual partners you most likely have slept with someone positive. As I was saying, these seed givers pass on the virus because they feel that they have the power of life in a sense. I can't help but to think these people want to play god. They feel that because they have the power to infect you with a life threatening illness they can determine whether or not you live on. That is just sick!
As a gay teenager I think HIV/AIDS will continue to play a major role in my life. A lot of people continue to think that gay males are to blame for most of the cases occurring each year, but people need to realize that it is happening in the heterosexual sector as frequently if not more. Have people not looked at Africa? Unless everyone there is a gay guy I doubt we are to blame for all the cases. Africa is right now suffering significantly and a whole generation of people can and will be wiped out if something is not done about this disease. Hundreds of children are dying because of AIDS. In the United States we have the luxury of keeping it under control as HIV. Yes! You heard me say, "Luxury!" If all those helpless people could live with HIV their whole life I think they would be happy knowing that they will live a life period. In the USA we have that luxury of being able to keep it under control, but unfortunately thousands of people are being robbed of their life by AIDS.
Each year that passes medical advances are made, and we come closer to a cure. It's astronomical how much has been discovered about this virus. It's impressive how many advances have been made in the field of HIV. It's heartbreaking how many have suffered because of this disease. For those who live with HIV it's important that you remember those who have died because of AIDS.
This disease has claimed the lives of fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers, sons, daughters, best friends, and acquaintances. Before HIV medication evolved to what it is today many people experienced the beating of AIDS. In a group of 10 friends one would be HIV negative. That one friend would see the declining state of health his friends faced. That one friend shed tears at 9 different funerals because of AIDS. That one friend had no choice but to burry his friends and watch hopelessly because he/she didn't have the answer. That one friend felt the thrashing of HIV/AIDS.
After hearing someone's personal encounter with HIV/AIDS I have to say that if you were to contract HIV. This day and age would be the perfect timing. Our medical advances are unbelievable. Personally I don't think there is a perfect time to get HIV. I mean I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy this disease, but if you were to get it there is plenty of resources, medication, and information in today's society.
To conclude this blog I have to say that I wish people would take precautions and take care when making decisions. It's undeniable that sex is a part of life, and as animals we need it, but incorporating a condom in your sexual pleasures won't hurt… it can save you from popping a pill.
I find alot in the post disturbing, most notably that as a poster-boy now for hiv, you aren't even 'out'.
"As a gay teenager I think HIV/AIDS will continue to play a major role in my life." As a poz teenager, I rather imagine it will. Perhaps I missed it somewhere on your myspace that you are poz.
The fact that this was written just a few days ago is even scarier. The fact that you are lying in it is shameful. Poz has it's posterchild. Cute and pretty on the outside, but all fluff on the inside... just like a marshmallow Peep™.
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Jesse says: I’m not the butchest thing ever, but [at least] I’m not a flamer....
Ok, Funny, when first meeting Jesse, I actually thought he was flaming, so much so that he could've been on fire. Not that I mind a flaming queen, I think they are cool. But am wondering that if he is so open here why not be just as open in MySpace? Since he seems to be pegged as the Poz Activist for his generation. ::)
Dingo says: To which I would normally agree, except for the fact that his story is limited to being pretty, having sex without a condom and getting HIV (with a new car every year). He hasn't 'done' anything.
I agree with this as well. The only thing he has seem to have done is get on the cover of Poz magazine in record time. And another thing he has done which is a first to me here, is to split the masses majorly. I must say I was even surprised by some forum members positive responses to his Poz article but hey to each their own I suppose.
Jesse says: You take your pill once a day (for most people its once a day) and you move along like normal. I mean some people don't need pills for years or ever because their bodies do a great job at fighting that virus.
I'm wondering where he is getting his information from. True, everyone's immune system is different when handling the virus but I have yet to hear of anyone who never needed to take the pills. If that was true, I think the researchers would be hunting that person down. I, myself am going on 10 years w/o meds but with a cd4 of 340, I know my time to pop that once a day pill is coming. I can only pray that once a day works for me.
Jesse says: In the United States we have the luxury of keeping it under control as HIV. Yes! You heard me say, "Luxury!" If all those helpless people could live with HIV their whole life I think they would be happy knowing that they will live a life period. In the USA we have that luxury of being able to keep it under control, but unfortunately thousands of people are being robbed of their life by AIDS.
Um, some people in the good old U S of A are struggling like those in Africa. Yes, the meds are here but they can't afford them, so they DO NOT have that luxury as you say. And those that pay out of their pockets are struggling to keep their meds. So on that point, I think you are talking out your ass, sorry.
But you know what all of this being said, it is prolly just falling on deaf ears. I think I am done here but what a shame that Jesse can talk the talk and those that don't know any better will listen and believe him. But would like to see Jesse years down the line after it has ravaged his body and see if he will still be saying the same old same old......*YAWN*
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Queen~ You and I must have been seperated at birth in some distant hood. I AGREE with everything you have posted here, immensely. I just read the MySpace bit above and cannot believe what it contained.
Maybe I am simply a white middle-class hetero chick who doesn't truly understand the real meaning of "FLAMER." Upon the arrival of Hurricane J a couple of weeks ago, I thought this was the Towering Inferno sweeping through the Forums.....but was even more appalled when........
After reading the bulk of the MySpace posting, I got the feeling that Jesse was NOT HIV+. Um, was it in another thread (that MANY of you regulars to the forums obviously did not read from a couple of weeks ago) that Jesse scanned and posted his labs from Feb 2007?
I am confused as to WHY Jesse appears to be strongly trying to get a message across in MySpace WITHOUT including his own status? I understand its a matter of privacy, but lately Jesse has seemed to be taking the "advocate role." Why wouldn't he want to take this stance on MySpace, as well?
I am UTTER-ly confused here. One pill a day? ONE PILL a day? I personally have taken 20 pills per day before, for six years even, and barely made it to the toilet many days. Not everyone just "pops a pill", whistles dixie, and struts out the door. Its NOT that simple. There is so much more to having this virus than just popping a pill. This broad generalization of treatment by someone so NEW to the virus makes me sick.
Yes, WHERE are you getting your information from?!?!
I had actually calmed down about this entire "cover" subject over the past day, but now after finally reading the MySpace post.........Dammit, I am livid.
And then another mood has taken over here for me. Yes, POZ has taken advantage of this guy. I certainly don't think Jesse was there at the editing table, picking and choosing what paragraphs to include in his story. When someone does a story on you, you sit and excitedly await the day it hits the stands. You usually don't have a say in the final copy of the article. Jesse, I can't believe you are so thrilled by how the magazine has portrayed you, like a Paris Hilton of Miami. What about the true story here? Forget about all of the materialistic, fancy-shmancy references to glam and lifestyle.....
What about living with HIV? The story really has no substance to it....at all. :(
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Wow. That Myspace post was incredibly and amazingly fucked up.
You know, I'm getting the impression that HIV is being treated as some sort of fab little accessory that I could take off and on at will.
One pill a day for most people. Tee hee.
Chortle.
Move along like normal.
Heh heh.
'It's undeniable that sex is a part of life, and as animals we need it, but incorporating a condom in your sexual pleasures won't hurt… it can save you from popping a pill.'
Deep, bro. Really deep.
You know, the next time MRSA almost kills me, I'll remember that the only inconvenience to having this disease is the horror (a horror that is clearly on the level of the Holocaust) of taking a pill. A single, solitary pill.
Benj
(Who is wondering what they put into the water in south Florida.)
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God what a mess of a post (the Myspace one). It's shocking on so many levels.
I think the main problem here begins when you have "ambassadors for community outreach" who are glamourized, made up, and photoshopped, and appear on Oprah, Tyra Banks, MTV etc. Someone like J sees them, and sees how glamorous they look, and doesn't realize that at 40, no way you will be able to look like that without very costly and serious surgical interference. And unlike Ford, who very courageously exposes his difficult journey to a great appearance, this won't be discussed.
Here is a shortcut to fame. HIV? too bad, let's at least make something out of it. After all, "the gilrs" already did and I get on fabulously with girls. Should I sit down to learn the facts first, or just come out with some babble about one pill a day, taking care of ourselves, heart to heart with your doctor, etc.
I can't blame Jesse, since people who are much more senior to him in this seem to be doing the same thing (i.e. podcasts from exotic locations, interviewing hollow cheeked natives, do you have access to medication, oh no, oh really?... and did you know, ladies, how important it is to feel as confident with your doctor as you do with your hairdresser, I mean really, just to be able to talk to him/her about all those intimate things a lady never tells... very useful stuff, you gotta love those pods about nothing, blogs with no substance).
Why NOT pick Jesse for the cover? He looks like the guys in the ads so no stark contrast there. He is not as articulate but not too off the mark from the positive babble we are fed by people who know much much better. Pick him now while her is still fresh to add a "realistic touch" to those ads. They pay several million US$ a year, the companies that put them out. How much did you get Jesse? Not everything is use and abuse, but a lot in the world of fab and glamour is, as the departed Anna Nicole could have told you. Too bad that the fake greedy culture that did her in has seeped into Pozland.
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While I can understand and even empathize, continuing to savage Jessie by picking apart every word he has ever written will in the end serve no meaningful purpose. It's convenient and easy, but serves no real purpose.
I encourage everyone to do what Peter suggested and forward your thoughts about this issue to Sally Chew at Poz Magazine. The good, the bad, and the ugly. Do I expect her to respond? I doubt it. If nothing else, if she is as thoughtful a person as Peter suggested it just might get her thinking about why such a visceral reaction to her article. We all understand why, and I think that includes Peter and the rest of the moderators. I also think that is why Peter has chosen to let this thread remain open.
Look, we all know that Jessie is not going to return and try and defend the indefensible. We know enough about the kid to know he can't. What I am more concerned about is making Ms Chew understand what is wrong with her writing an article like this and the dangerous, superficial message it sends.
Peter has supplied the email address above and I invite everone along with me to extend Ms Chew an invitation to respond to the many questions and concerns that have been posed. If she chooses not to respond, then that folks is your real story.
Believe me, I share many of your thoughts about this nineteen year old kid, but why is this beginning to remind me of gay bashing?
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Sadly, DingoBoi has returned this thread to nothing more than a personal attack on Jesse, so I'm locking it. You can be a real school-yard bully sometimes. If folks want to continue a constructive discussion of POZ's editorial policies, please use the What do people think of Poz Magazine? (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=14867.0) thread instead.
Peter
Edited with apologies to Jonathan, who's name I incorrectly invoked.