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Author Topic: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS  (Read 52861 times)

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Offline netta

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LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« on: January 12, 2010, 07:01:33 pm »
THERE WILL BE NO TEARS, JUST JOY AND HAPPINESS I WISH FOR ALL. NO DRAMA, NO HURTS, BUT THATS ONLY IN A PERFECT WORLD. I PRAY WE ALL ARE ABLE TO FORFILL OUR DEEPEST WISHES AND DESIRES....  WE ARE STRONG, WE HAVE BEEN THROUGH HELL, BUT WE ARE SURVIVORS!!! AND WE ARE HEAR FOR EACH OTHER. Congrats MOON on your wedding date!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY QUEEN
« Last Edit: January 14, 2010, 12:18:10 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #1 on: January 13, 2010, 05:47:17 am »
Queen, happy birthday!  It sounds like things might be looking up?  I hope they are.  I can't believe dickhead wants a protective order against you.  As if!  I'm going to try to get that yahoo messenger thing downloaded this weekend, so we can chat with that.  Hang in there.

Cin, congrats on wedding date!  I hope you post some pics.  That's really exciting. 

Netta, thanks for starting the new thread.  I hope things are going alright for you, you haven't really said much lately. 

Not much going on here.  Saturday I went with a friend to hear two NA speakers.  The first one is a nurse, and she talked about her addiction through her career.  She said when she had patients who were on Demerol, they never got it on her shift, because she would take it.  A lot of other stuff, but she's been through the diversion program that nurses who have addiction go through, and has 4 years clean now. 
Other than that, I've been having problems driving my car.  It's a 5-speed, which I never should have gotten.  My feet are in really bad shape, neuropathy wise, and it makes it extremely hard to hold in the clutch when I have to stop, and I'm having a hard time making a distinction between the brake and clutch when I'm driving.  Sometimes my foot just slips off the clutch, which isn't good.  I don't want to go to a buy-here pay-here place, because they charge way too much for cars.             I guess that's it for now.  I hope you ladies all have a good one.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #2 on: January 13, 2010, 12:31:49 pm »
hi gf's hows it going???? I've  been going through a lot lately, but hopefully it will get better by the weekend. My husband is getting worse, new years he stayed out all nite with my car and spent his check.  last weekend we got into a n argument about my grandaughter. Last week he got  paid and messed it up.This week Monday, they cut his and my phone off. I warned him to get another cell phone carrier. I have been added to my daughters family plan and have a new phone t mobile. I also have the same phone number.
Well he came home from work and looked crazy when he learned the phone was off, so i reminded him he was suppose to get one with his last week paycheck. He said he was going to walmart to "Look" for a new phone prepaid, and he had no money. Well he went looking alright and came back the next day after work with the same clothes on. he says he was at a t friends house, this guy whom I know is letting him move in, he has a 2 bedroom apartment. He is leaving this weekend, has some bags packed already. He says he is trying to get a tax loan this week to pay my car note this month and get his car working, but heis definitely leaving andi will exhale finally. where he is moving he can walk to work.Now he gets paid FRiday  and already he hinted that his paycheck was gone. this means he did his usually bank trick to get money out that he doesn't have!!!!They will take out what he owes from his direct deposite, now he brings home around 550.00 so he spent a lot t get high!!! so things have been stressed. i need to train my puppy,she goes outside, in thehouse but not on her pee pad!!!!
« Last Edit: January 13, 2010, 12:34:01 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #3 on: January 13, 2010, 07:03:29 pm »
Evening Ladies----

I am making this a quick post because once again, I snuck to the 2nd floor to use their computer. I am not suppose to be on this floor because I am in a different program....As Bugs Bunny would say, "Ain't I a stinker?"... ;)

Not much going on.. waiting on the drama from the next court date which is the 19th. Still trying to find a lawyer but a case worker is suppose to be helping me with that. This court deal is like a cross of Jerry Springer and Judge Judy. Waiting to be transferred to a secret location, hopefully this place will have a computer, we'll see.

Betty---That would be great because my hearing aids are fading fast. I should say hearng aid because the left one is done already. Oh, I am talking about getting Yahoo messenger. I am typing faster than I am thinking if that made sense. Can't wait to hear from you.

Netta-- I knew that crap was going to happen to you. That is what crackheads do especially ones who have a job. The bank is only putting up with it because they are getting their money. But I will do cartwheels when he is out your house for good. I am praying that he still does not bother you once he leaves. Change the locks, he prolly has a spare and change your number. Good title for the thread and thanks for the birthday wishes. Someone told me today that I don't even look 41 and another person here(at shelter) said that 40 is just the beginning of life. At first, I didn't understand but now I do. But this go around I will appreciate the simple things more.

Cindy----Congrats girl...Someone deserves happiness with all this drama in the air. And what happened to making me the flower girl, eh. I would've snuck out Camp Loony to make your wedding... :D All I can say is take a lot of pics.....And getting married in jeans, this time I do agree with your Mother. I would slap you upside the head for that one... ;D


Stay Tuned....Hopefully more tomorrow...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #4 on: January 14, 2010, 05:44:32 am »
Netta, I'm not surprised at what he's doing.  It's going to be great when he's gone, and I agree with Queen.  You should probably change the locks, or have the management at where you live change them.  Otherwise, he may come back in and take whatever is worth money there.  Seriously.  I had to do that with my 2nd husband when I finally had enough (change the locks).  I mean, if he took my ATM card and wiped out my bank account, what would have stopped him from coming back in when he knew I was gone.  How are things going with the house?

Queen, so they don't have a computer on the floor you're on?  That sucks that you have to sneak around.  And that's funny about the court being a cross between Springer and Judy.  Is your caseworker going to go to court with you for support?  I sure hope someone does.  If I were there I'd go with you, and shoot dirty looks to the dickhead.  I so hope things start going upwards for you. 

Last day of the work week, and I'm so happy.  Yesterday I ran the food pantry, because the girl who usually does it had to go to the dentist.  It went well, but I've helped her out before, so I kind of knew what I was doing.  It's amazing how many people need help nowadays.  I meet people all the time who have lost their jobs, or had a bad situation happen to them, where they're either homeless, or living in the shelter.  It makes me truly grateful for what I have.  Every time something happens, I remind myself that a lot of people have it much worse.  Queen, my hat's off to you.  You're truly one tough sister, and I keep you and Netta in my prayers every day.            Hang in there, ladies.  It's going to be spring soon. :)
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #5 on: January 14, 2010, 12:47:28 pm »
 HI GF'S ,
FIRST OF ALL ,MY PRAYERS GO OUT TO HATI, WE CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE THE DEVASTATION THEY ARE GOING THROUGH.I HAVE NO COMPLAINTS ABOUT ANYTHING ANYMORE, AFTER THIS!

I PLAN ON CHANGING THE LOCKS OF COURSES .OK THE NEW HOUSE IS READY BUT WE FOUND OUT THAT THE STIMULUS CREDIT MONEY, WILL HAVE TO BE FILED SEPERATE AND TAKE SOME TIME, MAYBE WE WILL GET A CHECK BY MARCH. YOU HAVE TO SEND IN ALL YOUR PAPER WORK BECAUSE LAST YEAR YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO PROVE U BOUGHT A HOUSE, THERE WAS A LOT OF FRAUD!
SO SOME THINGS WE HAVE TO DO TO THE HOUSE HAVE TO WAIT, LIKE BUYING APPLIANCES, STOVE, DISWASHER, REFRIGERATOR, CEILING FANS, ETC. ALSO WE HAVE TO HIRE A MOVING COMPANY, BECAUSE WE HAVE NO MANPOWER. MY DAUGHTERS INCOME TAX WILL NOT BE ENOUGH TO DO ALL THIS, AND WE HAVE TO CONTINUE PAYING THE MORTGAGE, THIS RENT HERE, MY CAR NOTE ETC. IT IS GOING TO BE TIGHT, BUT WE WILL MAKE IT,IT WILL ALL BE WORTH IT. SHE SHOULD GET ABOUT 5,000. FROM THE 1ST HOMEBUYERS STIMULUS CHECK. THIS WILL BE  A BLESSING. WE HAVE A MAN WORKING ON THE HOUSE NOW, THAT DID PAINT, AND REMOVE CARPET AND FINISH THE HARDWOOD FLOORS,  WHICH ARE BEAUTIFUL ! IT IS AN OLD HOUSE BUT GREAT SHAPE. ALL THIS WAS PAID FOR AT CLOSING BY THE SELLERS, EXCEPT THE FLOORS, WHICH MY DD HAS TO PAY FOR. SO I AM BEING PATIENT, AND THANKFUL, I HAVE BEEN A WREAK LATELY, UNTILL HE LEAVES. HE HAS MESSED UP SO MUCH MONEY , THE BILLS ARE BEHIND, BUT WHAT CAN I DO EXCEPT PRAY, WE PAID RENT AND ELECTRIC, BUT  NOT MY CAR NOTE. HE IS SUPPOSE TO GET A TAX LOAN TODAY TO PAY IT AND GET HIS CAR WORKING. HE SAYS HE IS GIVING UP HIS DEBIT CARD AND PUTTING HIS MONEY IN THE CREDIT UNION. THIS ALL MAKES SINCE TO HIM,BUT HE IS STILL IN DENIAL, AND I AM NOT HOLDING MY BREATH, IF HE GETS THE LOAN TODAY, CAUSE HE MAY NOT EVEN COME HOME. WHATEVER HE IS OUTTA HERE SATURDAY!!!!!MY DD  IS NOW RESPONSIBLE FOR WATER BILL, CABLE., RENT ,MORTGAGE,ELECTRIC, CAR NOTE, CAR INSURANCE AND PHONE AND FOOD.MOST IMPORTANT IS MY DOG LUCY GETTING HER SHOTS, SHE IS BEHIND. MY DD WILL USE SOME MONEY FROM INCOME TAX TO CATCH UP AND ALSO PAY UP HER MOTGAGE FOR A COUPLE MONTHS. I ONLY GET A CHECK 1X A MONTH WILL HAVE TO PAY 300.00 CAR LOAN !!! WHATEVERS LEFT WILL GO TO BILLS. MY DD HAS A GOOD JOB, BUT  SHE STILL LIVING FROM PAYCHECK TO PAYCHECK. WAITING TO EXHALE.

QUEEN -I HOPE YOU GETMOVED TO A NICE PLACE. THINGS WILL WORK OUT GIRL.
BETTY- THANKS FOR PRAYERS, WILL TALK THIS WEEKEND.
LOVE TO EVERYONE.
« Last Edit: January 14, 2010, 01:00:57 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #6 on: January 15, 2010, 07:50:06 am »
Netta, wow, you and your daughter really have a lot going on.  I wouldn't expect a dime out of the husband.  Like you said, if he gets the tax loan, he may not show up until he's ready to get his stuff to move.  You know, Netta, this will all probably explode in his face.  Eventually, he'll probably not go to work because of being out using, lose his job, and then he'll be in bad shape.  But, it will have nothing to do with you.  It will all be based on his choice.  Anyway, I hope things go alright for you and your daughter with all the bills you two are now responsible for.  I agree, getting your dog her shots is very important.  I was wondering if you were alright, since you posted in all caps. 

Yeah, what's going on in Haiti is tragic, just awful.  And some of the things the far right are saying about it are ridiculous.  Rush Limbaugh said that Obama is using this as a way to forward his political career, and that if people donate to the site Obama mentioned, they would be getting contribution letters from Obama's people.  And Pat Robertson (a right-wing preacher) said that the people in Haiti are under a curse, because they made a deal with the devil.  What ignorant, stupid things to say.  The truth is, when Haiti was owned by France, they wanted their country back.  So, they held like religious ceremonies, and prayed to their Gods, which of course is perfectly logical, and they had every right to do that.  Pat Robertson said they made a deal with the devil.  I can't comprehend how some crazy jackasses can be so heartless, and spread such vial.  It makes me sick. 

And yeah, when I think of the problems those people are having, plus the ones I see every day at my job, it makes my problems seem like a lot less.  And look at our Queen.  Poor thing's in a shelter in NYC, yet she keeps a good attitude, which I'm sure is extremely hard.  Well, I guess I can make it through another day, not wallowing in self pity.                           OK ladies, you all have a good one.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #7 on: January 15, 2010, 01:21:53 pm »
HI GF'S,  
I went with hubby to file taxes yesterday. Good news is he can't do anything without my signiture and id.
Bad news is that it could take 2 weeks to get check. His apartment is suppose to be empty this weekend when folks move, so he wants to wait to get OUR check to move on his on. good news, his bank took his debit card. bad news he doesn't want to move with his friend. Good news, I am going to pay off car loan when check comes, he agreed. Good news he will have enough left to move with and get car fixed or either fuck it up, and be homeless!!!! waiting today to hear if it will come rapid refund, then check will be here this weekend. SO i am waiting for the call. Hubby has no phone so income tax preparers will call me. Also he is suppose to give me money left from his check today, if he doesn't fuck it up, he knows he is on his last leg.

Hope everyone is well, many of you missing in action!!! HOLLA !!!
« Last Edit: January 15, 2010, 01:24:40 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #8 on: January 16, 2010, 07:22:27 pm »
Hi GFS~

I watched the 20/20 special last night on Haiti and its so hard to believe such devastation is in our world.  My goodness, it puts it in perspective!

Queen, I agree with Betty, you are one tough sister.  What is the latest on when you can get a place?  Wasn't someone out on vacation who was supposed to help get you settled?  Sorry, I am all confused lately.

Netta, BT is right, keep doing what you have to in order to protect yourself.  The last thing you need is the "hubby" beating down your door to get things of value to sell.  He is in such a downward spiral, I believe he will be hitting bottom very soon.

On a happier note, I found my wedding gown yesterday on a whim.  I went to a bridal store to look, just to get ideas, and walked out with a dress!  OMG, I don't think I mentioned (or did I?) that Ice asked me to marry him on Valentine;s Day.  Maybe I mentioned it, heck so much is happening.  Pray that we don't get heavy snow.  Its going to be a very small ceremony, with just family.  More soon!

Go Ravens!

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #9 on: January 17, 2010, 02:55:18 pm »
hi gf's, nothing much going on,wew'll have to wait for income tax check. going to put my computer in shop today. got a sisterhood meeting for black world aids day next month. love netta.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #10 on: January 18, 2010, 07:37:36 am »
Netta, I am so glad the husband won't be able to cash the check without your signature.  Also, I tried to download yahoo messenger, so I could chat with Queen,  but it wanted to put the yahoo toolbar on my computer.  That is something I don't want.  It happened before, and I uninstalled it.  Don't you have yahoo messenger?  And did you have to get the yahoo toolbar?  If not, how did you do it?  Maybe today I'll try again and see if I can get it figured out. 

Cin, that's great that you got your dress! You did mention you guys are getting married on V. Day.  Please have someone take lots of pics, so we can see the highlights.

Nothing much going on.  I get the day off because of Martin Luther King Jr Day.  I'm waiting to get my tax forms from when I did the job experiences last year, and from the church, which I probably won't get until the 1st of February.  That's because the church changed accountants, and she has a mess to deal with right now.  Also, my school is supposed to send out the forms that, I guess showed how much our tuition was, or some such.  Supposedly there's a thing called an education credit people can use.  I don't know the particulars of it, or if it's going to be a benefit or not.  United Way, and some other agencies, are doing people's, with an income of under $49,000, taxes for free.  I have an appointment on Feb. 4th.  Hopefully I'll have everything by then.                            That's about it.  Yeah, there are some ladies who are MIA.  Hopefully everyone's doing alright.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #11 on: January 19, 2010, 05:49:30 am »
I just wanted to say, I know I bitch about my boss and job often.  I don't, however, talk about the positive aspects of where I work.  We help a lot of people.  We have free breakfast Mon-Thurs, which serves the homeless, and (what I call) street people.  And they can take a shower, and some can do laundry, and get a clean change of clothes.  We also help with prescriptions, doctor referral, treatment referral etc.  And a lot of times, people end up in my office, talking about their situation, and I try to remedy their problems. 

We're also unique, in that we don't turn away people who are drunk or high, unless they're combative.  We treat them the same way we treat everyone, which is with dignity and true concern.  And that's the part I love about my job.               You all have a good one.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #12 on: January 19, 2010, 12:52:58 pm »
Hi GF'S, Everything is everthing, just thank God for this beautiful day. talked to my moms a long time last night, about the family and my brother, my oms is so unique, a 79 she remembers so much of my lif that I don't. I like t here her stories of her life and last nite we talked and laughed about my late brother. He really lived life and traveled everywhere. One thing I want to do is go to the islands and take myself on a crusie. I have never been on one, not cause I didn't have the money, but when I had it I did something else for someone else. I think of the mistakes I've made with money and it feels like I won't ever be blessed again, but I know that s not true. God can bless anyhow anytime!!!! Hope you all are having a gret day!! talked to QUEEN on yahoo im. she is hanging in there and has to go to court soon.
y computer is in the shop so I am using hubbys.
Betty- I uploaded yahoo im and didn't get the toolbar. i didn't want it either. Keep tryng you can delete it or no make it your homepage by removing it.
hope al is well,
Moon - so happy you found your dress!

Ironically my aniversary will be Feb.12 !!!! We didn't make it a year!!!! I feEL i MADE A BIG MISTAKE AND i'M TAking inventory of my life. But first I have to forgive myself.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #13 on: January 20, 2010, 05:32:58 am »
Netta, I sent you a pm about yahoo messenger.  I've messed up a lot with money in the past, but every day is a new day.  Of course you can be blessed again.  I don't think there's a timeline on blessings.     I didn't know your mom was still alive. There's a blessing right there.      Anyway, I hope things go up for you, Netta.  I think about you and Queen every day.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #14 on: January 20, 2010, 10:05:22 pm »
I can't believe all the crap with Queen, I keep thinking she's still her old hood and not where she is now.  I hope she's OK.  I miss you girls.

Got the flowers all ordered, cake is tomorrow.  Think PURPLE.  :-)

~ Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #15 on: January 21, 2010, 12:03:29 pm »
Hi GF's I have been staying in touch with Queen via text, I will give her your regards, last I heard she was nervous about going to cou rt and I tried to reasure her not to worry.
Well  they cut our water off today, and not even a cut off notice! of course it s in his name and me and my dd were unable to keep up with it, since doing everything else. Last week he gave grocerie money and thats all, paid 100.00 on car loan ,which  was suppose to be 300.00. Of course this is due to his spending and getting high, so the rest of his check went to bank and they finally cut of his bank card so he can't play games with the atm machine. Still waiting on tax refund. Guess we wil try cutting the water tback on with the right tool, so ghetto! lol I am not letting this upset me. Hope everyone is fine.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #16 on: January 21, 2010, 12:47:33 pm »
Hello Ladies---

Where to start.....There is a computer on my floor but it can only be used when the Assistant Director is here because it is also outside her office. So, it is like a catch her if you can kind of deal.

I still have not been moved anywhere and it really doesn't look like it may happen anytime soon. It is hard to find a vacancy in any of the dv shelters. My other case manager, I have like 3 now, is trying to find me a place in a building that is just for hiv people. I'm not sure how I feel about that because I have feel like my status is being thrown out in the open if that is what the building is known as. But at the same time, it beats being here. My case manager here at the shelter is still working on my housing application so I don't think she has sent it off yet. And there is other little things you have to comply with here before they send it off. Just found that out yesterday at an orientation. All my appointments to doctors and such has been made but I can't do anything until my new HMO kicks in. And I do believe my right hearing aid has finally died. So, all I am hearing now is muffled sounds unless you talk really loud to me. That is why I am asking folks to communicate with me through text or yahoo, talking to me on the phone is useless.

Now about the court hearing....*sighs*...They gave the dickhead an order against me which I could not believe. I was pissed that he could get one based on lies. Now everything is going to trial in March. I do have a lawyer so she kinda expected it to happen the way it did but now that we are going to trial, he has to be able to back his shit up. The only thing he can prove is that I stabbed his tv...Kinda makes me laugh when I think about it. I want to see how he is gonna prove anything else. Whereas, I have proof of a lot of things, not going to say what incase he decides to read the forums all of a sudden. I was a nervous wreck until I actually saw him which was kinda weird. He does not look good at all, looks like his face is sunken in and he has lost weight. And for some reason he kept trying to stretch his neck over to see me but my cms kept blocking his view so he didn't see me til I actually stood in front of the judge. I am thinking since he won't get any time for what he did that I won't either and that it is a waste of time except for the fact that I want a permanent order. So, February will be full of meeting with lawyers.

I am still not willing to leave NY. Just found out that they shut down the Section 8 program for 2010 and any vouchers they gave are not being honored. Doesn't affect me since I lost my voucher in November. I am amazed that you ladies consider me strong, I guess I have to be to deal with all of this. Though I did have a mini-meltdown yesterday. I am feeling extremely overwhelmed. I actually feel like I have no say over my life right now. I am in a shelter where I have a curfew, eat terrible processed food which seems to do a number on my stomach,have to go to bed like I am a child getting ready for school and all these different people telling me what to do. I feel like I don't have any control over my life and it frustrates me to no end!!!! I keep trying to remain focused and remind myself of the end result. My own place where I can cook me a juicy steak!!!! I miss cooking and definitely appreciate the simple things in life, that's for sure. And I will definitely have something to blog about eventually if Tim still has me as a blogger here, I am not sure.

Netta--- It's not ghetto doing what you have to do to get by. And it's about time the bank took dh's atm card. It should've been done long ago. And don't feel bad about your marriage not lasting a year, mine lasted about 6 months though I am still legally married. I just can't afford a divorce about now and I want my damn name back!!!

Cindy---Purple is a good color, it represents royalty. I am glad you found your dress. You should take a pic and send it to me. I am happy for you.

Betty--- Will Yahoo still let you download the messenger if you don't want the toolbar? I forget, I think I had the toolbar but I didn't think you had to download it to get the messenger. Do you have any type of messenger? I think I can get MSN's messenger, I am not sure.

Well, that is about it for me in a nutshell. I miss you guys like crazy and I miss the support you guys give me. I feel like jumping up and down and singing "I will survive". Have a good one....
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #17 on: January 22, 2010, 07:48:16 am »
Cin, purple, what a great color!  I can't wait to see some pics. 

Netta, we do what we have to do to survive.  I guess you won't be able to count on dh for anything.  But, that's probably no surprise to you.  I hope he comes through on paying the car loan off.  Just take care of you, your daughter, and grands.  Let him fend for himself.

Queen, yahoo doesn't give the option of downloading messenger without the toolbar.  I'm going to try later to download it, and see if I can get rid of the toolbar.  Something's gotta give.  We need to chat.  I can't believe they gave the asshole an order against you.  Hopefully when it goes to trial, his case will be blown out of the water.   I'm so sorry you haven't been moved.  Maybe the place where people with HIV stay is better than where you are?  I hope something happens soon.  I don't blame you for not wanting to leave NY.  It seems there's help there, even if it is slow coming.  And I'm sorry your hearing aid has gone out.  Can your case manager help you get to an ear doctor to get a new one?  Girl, you just hang tough.  I'm keeping you in my prayers constantly. 

I'm so glad this week is over.  I had to throw someone out of my office a couple days ago.  There's a guy who comes in drunk all the time (and I told you all we don't throw people out because they're drunk or high unless they get combative).  Well, he went on and on about how his landlord had him "up with all these blacks, and that can't happen because I'm white."  I told him he'd have to leave, that we don't tolerate racism there.  He stormed out.  Jerk.  And then there's this guy who hangs around there, who says he needs a string to hold his pants together.  But, he does this every day.  And he always lurks around with his pants open enough to see his underwear.  Just the way he acts, I have a feeling he's waiting to expose himself.  We are trying to keep him out of the place unless he wears a pair of pants that are fastened. 

I have much to do today.  I hope you ladies have a good one, and that some of you that are MIA let us know how you're doing.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #18 on: January 22, 2010, 01:48:48 pm »
hi gf's Water back on! yesterday! my hub got a ;oan to pay  some of the bill. Well we are in a dilema, my daughter and I, we found out that her stimulus check wont be process till april and it could take 3 month to get the check. We are trying to decide do we stay here and pay rent and mortage??? or do we move and suffer the legal conciquences of breaking t he lease, which means we might have to pay all
of the rent due. Rent here is about 800.00 thats a lot plus the other bills. Our mortage is half that!! We could move with her income tax return,  if we decide,  but the rebate stimulus would have made moving a lot easier if we got it sooner. We are worried about this lease, but if we break it and he takes us to court, we will have another bill to pay!!!

I am not worried too much about hubby cause he got 2 offers for apartments andhe knows he has to pay his utilities here in his name to move. Just waiting for next week, when the income tax return is due. Of course i will be right by his side to cash the check and go right to thecar loan place!!!

I know we are all having trying times right now,
Especially Queen.- I am praying for you!!!
I don't know why you ahve to go to trial !!! that sucks , but don't worry yourself, you did nothing wrong.

Betty-
Your job is a trip , I h ope things get better.I am hanging in there. Things are gonna get better. just got to make the right choices. One thing I know I am too blessed to be stressed!!!!

Everyone else have a nice weekend and we miss you
"to thine own self be true"

Offline keepingfaith

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #19 on: January 22, 2010, 04:52:40 pm »
Hey Ladies,

How are you guys. Its been a long time since I have post. Nothing really exciting going on in my life. Its the same ole same ole. My cd4 is at the highest it has ever been. its 972 ;D. Well im at work doing a drive by. LOL

I will catch back up more later. 
Have anyone heard from VIV?

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #20 on: January 23, 2010, 07:41:37 am »
Netta, that is quite a situation, about wanting to move, but not wanting to be hold liable for breaking the lease.  Maybe you and your daughter could talk to the manager at your complex, explain your situation, and see what (s)he says.  He could be very understanding.  I hope things work out. And they will. 

Latrice, good to see you!  Are you in school now?

Not much going on with me.  I'm going to try to get to a meeting this morning (NA meeting).  A store not too far from me is having a super-sale for one day that I may check out.  And later on, I might go out to eat with my best friend.  Other than that, nothing going on.  You all have a good one.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #21 on: January 23, 2010, 05:34:31 pm »
Netta, that is quite a situation, about wanting to move, but not wanting to be hold liable for breaking the lease.  Maybe you and your daughter could talk to the manager at your complex, explain your situation, and see what (s)he says.  He could be very understanding.

Netta

I totally agree with BT. You're already faced with the worst, so discussing it might lead to options. Plus, you become a spokesperson for what a great place your apartment is/was. In fact, you might want to do a little research on your complex if you can, BEFORE talking with the manager.   First, find out if the complex or building is full or if there are a lot of empty apartments---that will have a bearing on your manager's thinking. If he's got a line of folks wanting to live there, he might be quite okay with letting you get out of the lease. There's a possibility he could rent it for more if the market rate in your area has increased. Another thing you could do is get a friend to call from a phone other than yours and inquire about rent rates, availability, types of apartments, etc.  So, say for example, you go into the discussion knowing that the rent of one their apartments like yours is now $875 per month and there's only one ( or no ) apartment available and you know that people would love to live there, then you know you've actually got something that will benefit the management if you're ready to go. If your apartment is clean and ready to turn back and you know you'll get the full security deposit back then all the better for the next adventure. Finally, if you know of anyone looking for an apartment, THAT could be attractive to the manager. Oh, yes, one other option, do you know whether or not your lease allows or doesn't allow subletting? Likely not---it can make a big mess, but just worth knowing if it, too, is another option for you.  Best of luck. Been following your posts and congratulate you on the progress past the pain. Em

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #22 on: January 23, 2010, 07:41:55 pm »
Hi gfs took pic of my puppy Lucy. She is 4 1/2 month now. used ,someother camera, mine is broke. pictures not to clear.
Ok we rent a house. Ladlord is a lawyer!!! i talked to him yesterday and told him we could no longer afford this house, after my hubby seperates. He said he was suprised and not expecting this, (I know for fact he has other houses out here and not hurting for money) Any way, He said we are by law responsible for the remainder of the rent. I found out my lease is to July, 13mos instead of 12. Anyway I told him I wanted to move March 1, 2010. He said we have to rent it by then, and pay march rent and he would let the rest go. why if we find someone to move in on march 1st do we still have to pay??? Well he has 1000.00 in security deposit. We will do the best we can, I told him he can put up sign next week after I get carpet cleaned. So we will see.
I hope everyone is ok, miss those la dies who are mia, vivt, snow,minsmom etc.

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« Last Edit: January 23, 2010, 07:52:19 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #23 on: January 24, 2010, 07:26:36 am »
Netta, your puppy is adorable!  So, it sounds like as long as someone will move into the house in March, then after than you're not responsible for the rent.  Well, I guess that's better than nothing.  Hopefully someone will take it right away. 

I'm missing the ladies also, and some haven't been around in quite awhile-Vivyt, Snow, and someone we haven't heard from in a long time-Christy! 

Oh, also Netta, you must have the yahoo toolbar hidden, because the only way to "get rid" of it, is to uninstall yahoo.  If you have yahoo messenger, they also force people to have their toolbar, and that's not something I want to do.  Please give Queen my love, and tell her I'm still thinking of her every day.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Ann

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #24 on: January 24, 2010, 09:22:34 am »
Netta, I learned the hard way many years ago to use the security deposit for the last month's rent because that was the ONLY way I ever got a security deposit back without the hassle of going to court. I always left my places immaculate as well, would be too embarrassing to leave a mess behind. Nine times out of ten I left the place improved with paint etc and being cleaner than when I moved in - especially the appliances. I dunno, maybe I just had bad luck with the landlords I had, but as I said, after my first few rentals ended in security deposit disasters, I never paid my last month rent.

Ann
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Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #25 on: January 24, 2010, 09:29:16 am »
Netta, I learned the hard way many years ago to use the security deposit for the last month's rent because that was the ONLY way I ever got a security deposit back without the hassle of going to court. I always left my places immaculate as well, would be too embarrassing to leave a mess behind. Nine times out of ten I left the place improved with paint etc and being cleaner than when I moved in - especially the appliances. I dunno, maybe I just had bad luck with the landlords I had, but as I said, after my first few rentals ended in security deposit disasters, I never paid my last month rent.

Ann

Ditto. I've never rented a place that I didn't improve by living there. And ditto on grungy stoves and fridges. The definition of "clean" is not consistent in the universe of appliances. I've never had a hassle about applying the security deposit as it was a matter of practicality. Depends on the landlord or management company and their bookkeeping style.

Offline missy

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #26 on: January 24, 2010, 05:11:42 pm »
Hey Gfs
Netta and Queen hope things get better for you with the new year.
Cindy, I am so glad you set a date for the wedding, congratulations. Valentines day is such a Sweet day to get married. Glad you found a dress too!
I met a wonderful guy and we have been dating for a month now.  I feel like a kid starting all over again but being alone wasn't good either. Will keep you posted. Mary :D


Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #27 on: January 25, 2010, 10:12:12 am »
Hi GF'S
Missy - good to hear from you and good luck, happy for you!!!

Emeralized and Ann-
Yes I have always keep my homes clean. When we moved here we mad improvement by painting, and the old appliances had been sparkly cleaned, don't know how some people live with dirty stoves and such, it was a job cleaning!!!
When my landlord stopped by one day last year he commented on how good the house looked.
my dh has gotten an apartment justwaiting to get income tax.
Only thing i worry about is if we don't get this house rented, will he take us to court and garnish my daughters paycheck and my social security.!!!
"to thine own self be true"

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #28 on: January 25, 2010, 12:23:58 pm »
Just checking in briefly. I have to go meet the case manager for barrier free living today. She's involved because of my disability with my hearing. I have met her once, I like her.

The criminal lawyer called me on Friday. I have 2 lawyers, one for family court and the other for criminal court. They combined both. Anyhow, she called to tell me what they are going to offer dickhead. It's a shame but at least if he accepts, which I think he won't, I'll get a 2 year order out of the deal. I think his lawyer is going to try to offer the same thing except they may try to say I need an anger management class. I think it's an insult that he even got the order based on lies. But I am beginning to look forward to trial because there is no way he can prove his crap.

As far as being here, same day different shit. Still waiting on the housing, my cm says I have done what I was suppose to. I just have to wait on her to refer me to a therapist.

That's about it for me. I'll try to check back tomorrow. I did write in my blog but my thoughts seem a bit sporadic. Snow is doing fine. I talk to her almost everyday. I think she has just been busy with the kids.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #29 on: January 26, 2010, 05:39:26 am »
Mary, congrats on the new love!  That's great news.

Netta, I don't believe your social security check can be garnished for back rent.  I think the only things social security can be garnishsed for are back taxes, child support, and student loans.  If he threatens that, I would immediately call social security to make sure what I'm saying is true.  I'm almost 100% certain, though.

Queen, it's great to hear from you.  What's barrier free living?  Is that something you want to do?  I just can't believe that son-of-a-bitch is trying to get a protective order against you.  What a jackass.  I hope things work out in your favor.  I don't see why they wouldn't. 

Nothing exciting going on with me.  Just work.  Honestly, I can't think of one thing new to report.  That's pretty pathetic, isn't it.  You all have a good one.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline sunseeker

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #30 on: January 27, 2010, 12:09:56 am »
Hello Ladies,

Well, its been about a year since I have posted anything.  Much in part to life being a roller coaster ride, but a good ride.  I was on such a high that I could stand reading all of the depressing posts in the various forums so I needed a long break.  Sorry for being selfish but I needed to live life and not think about being HIV positive.   When I stopped thinking about being HIV positive I started feeling healthier and my CD4's sky rocketed.  So with that said I missed the ladies forum and hope to get reacquainted with everyone.

So as I said the last year has been a roller coaster ride.  Still with the same boyfriend and it will be two years in Feb.  In October he asked me to marry him and we are getting married in May.   So as you can imagine I have been so busy planning my wedding. The guest list keeps growing and we are currently up to over 200 guests.   I am still working which is a blessing since my fiance is not, but we have been blessed in so many ways and have God on our side.

Netta and Queen it sounds like you guys have been on your own roller coaster of life.  I pray things get better soon for you both. 

Em and Ann glad to see you guys are still a part of the forum and hope you both are doing well. 

Cindy Congrats on the wedding.  This is such an exciting time.  Enjoy your day.

To all of the new members that have joined in the last year I look forward to getting to know you.
 




Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #31 on: January 27, 2010, 05:37:36 am »
Welcome back Sun, and congrats on your upcoming special day. :)

Betty
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #32 on: January 27, 2010, 10:40:21 am »
Good Morning Ladies---

Rise and shine!!! I am in a much better frame of mind. I have been moved from the Loony Bin to another place. I can't disclose location but it is way better than where I was. No more getting up at 6am and no more nasty ass women...Yay!!!!! But I did make some friends there so I have their phone numbers.

I still have to meet with lawyers but that will be next week. And I am still in the middle of getting all my stuff here. It's a bitch lugging heavy shit on the subway, that's for sure. I really don't have much to say right now. I just wanted to check in and let you all know that I am doing better.

Sun--Welcome back and Congrats on the wedding...

Betty--Dickhead already has an order against me since the last court date. I don't know if I am being charged with anything or not. I guess I will find that out when I see my lawyer.

Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #33 on: January 28, 2010, 05:46:40 am »
Queen, I'm so glad you got into another place.  I hope things continue to look up for you, and I hope things go well with the lawyers.  I'm sure it's a pain moving all your stuff. 

It's only 14F this morning, and we got a couple inches of snow, with 3-5 more inches expected.  And tonight it's supposed to be 2F.   I was really hoping winter was over, but here it comes again.  I hope everyone's safe.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #34 on: January 28, 2010, 08:27:33 am »
We've got a two-hour school delay and I'm soon donning boots to go out to shovel. I thought it was over, too, as we had such a nice run of decent days. Ah well, I look at shoveling as a form of exercise.

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #35 on: January 29, 2010, 01:52:48 pm »
Queen, I'm so glad you got into another place.  I hope things continue to look up for you, and I hope things go well with the lawyers.  I'm sure it's a pain moving all your stuff. 

It's only 14F this morning, and we got a couple inches of snow, with 3-5 more inches expected.  And tonight it's supposed to be 2F.   I was really hoping winter was over, but here it comes again.  I hope everyone's safe.

Yeah, I am glad I got into another place too. I am grateful for the simple things like peace and quiet!!!! :D I still have to move my things. I got a few of my things today but Monday I am going to get the rest of my things but I will have to take a cab. The rest of my things is too heavy to lug around on the subway. I have been getting panic attacks lately when I get lost which is about everytime I step out the door to do something.

It had snowed yesterday here but it didn't stay, it's just cold. I prefer that to the all the snow that you guys have been getting and the snow back home. My sister told me they got 3-5 inches back home. I don't think anyone is here on the weekends so I'll check back on Monday. Hope everyone has a good weekend.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #36 on: January 29, 2010, 08:58:18 pm »
Hi GF's has anyone heard from MINSMOM ???
Guess she's busy. i will pm her. Well I guess these winter storms are back! wow, thought it was over. Rain is all we expect. The tax preparers made a mistake and put my S. S. income in the wrong line!!t! this caused a rejection and a delay. on our refund. I just found out because we went there. Everything was to be ready today, but now we have to wait. I hope not for long, these people charge an arm and leg, but took off some fees because they were wrong. This has been a nitemare! This place is new and messing up everyone by not knowing what they are doing. My dd didn't get her refund today either as promised and she did her own. Seems the Irs is slow this year. A lot of people are complaining.
Glad you have a nicer place Queen.
Betty- hope the weather is not to bad, stay warm.
I will call you Saturday.
everyone have a great weekend!!!
« Last Edit: January 29, 2010, 09:01:03 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #37 on: January 30, 2010, 08:27:23 am »
Queen, good luck moving the rest of your stuff.  And I hope your panic attacks lessen.  Is there anyone who can explain the directions, or maybe write them down?  Like maybe someone who works there?  I wouldn't want to go out without knowing where I was going, so I can totally understand your panic attacks. 

Netta, Minismom participates in other parts of the forums, so she's around.  She just hasn't posted here in quite awhile.  I hope your taxes get figured out and you soon get your refund.  I know how much you're counting on it. 

My grandkids are coming over today.  We're going to watch a movie, eat pizza, and play games.  I really don't have any other plans, they'll be here all day.      Have a good one, ladies.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #38 on: February 01, 2010, 11:45:20 am »
Happy Monday Everyone---

Not much going on with me. Still getting use to the new place and the new rules. Things are way more strict here, not that I mind but I definitely feel safe. I went out today to grab a few groceries. Yep, I picked up that juicy steak!!!! And I will be cooking it a little later with mushrooms, onions and some asparagus. My mouth is watering just thinking about it.

I couldn't pick up the rest of my things today because a conflict in schedules and I have a mandatory meeting I have to attend here. But I will get the stuff on Wednesday. I am sorry to hear about you guys getting pounded with snow. For some reason, we're not getting much here and if we do it is usually gone as quick as it came. I was talking to a friend in Va Beach who said they got like 5 inches. I bet it damn near shut everything down..... :D

Netta, I hope everything works out with the taxes. I would be pissed too. I know how bad you want dh out of your life. I'll keep my fingers and toes crossed that things move along quickly.

Betty, How was your day with the grandkids? I bet they kept your hands full.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #39 on: February 02, 2010, 05:37:46 am »
Queen, so good to hear from you!  That steak sounds absolutely wonderful, wish I was there to share it with you.  You seem so much happier in the new place, and I'm so glad you feel safe.  That's important.  Yeah, the grandkids kept me very busy.  We actually watched the latest Harry Potter movie, which we had already seen in the theater, but they wanted to watch it again.  So, we did that, ate pizza, and played some games.  It was a nice day.  My granddaughter is in a training bra, and she doesn't like it because it's "harder to put on than a t-shirt." :)   I told her we'd have to have a ladie's day out sometime.   I hope things continue going up for you, girl.  I'm thinking about you.....
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #40 on: February 02, 2010, 10:37:56 pm »
Hi gfs, just checking in, everything is good.
« Last Edit: February 02, 2010, 10:42:42 pm by netta »
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Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #41 on: February 03, 2010, 05:42:24 am »
Hey Netta, good to hear from you also.  What's going on?  You and I are going to have to connect this weekend.

OK, I'm going to try to post a pic of my newest granddaughter.  Hopefully this will work.



[attachment deleted by admin]
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #42 on: February 03, 2010, 01:59:07 pm »
GOOD NEWS ! :) we got an anticipated tax check yesterday. the preparer that made the mistake got it for us, but they still owe us some money which will come with state check.
My DH paid of my car loan !!!!! yeah I can exhale, and got my tv out of hock!!!!!!. Yeah! He will be moving into his apartment on the 15th of the month, by then he will have all his tax money. I am glad this went smooth so far. Still have a  bills to catch up on, but not complaining.
Queen- how r things??
Betty - yeah we must catch up this weekend.
hope all is well.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #43 on: February 04, 2010, 05:42:33 am »
Good news on the taxes, Netta.  What do you think about my newest grandbaby?

Queen, I'm thinking about you......
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #44 on: February 04, 2010, 08:17:12 am »
Betty,

Your granddaughter is a doll.

Em

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #45 on: February 04, 2010, 11:01:11 am »
OMG she is a doll ! seems like she was just born yesterday ! she is getting big! how old is she now! pretty hair.
Well there are a lot of things I want to say, but can't put it all into words now. I am happy my dh has an apartment and is moving. We will keep in touch, I do wish him to do well and I do love and care for him also, but things have changed and I must be alone to heal thyself . I have been a support for him as far as helping him shop for his apartment. He has let me hold all his money to pay bills and such, but I know its only because he is scared he might get tempted, which is sad because he is still in denial.Happy to be moving the end of the month , we are paying rent and mortgage, which is hard. We have yet to rent the place, landord has to put up a sign, even if he doesn't rent before we move, we have to move, can't afford two places, he doesn't know she bought a house, which is none of his business, I just hope and pray she doesn't have to pay the future rent to settle our breaking the lease. besides that , all things are go.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #46 on: February 06, 2010, 07:39:10 am »
Thanks for the compliments on my grandbaby.

Netta, the baby is 7 months old.  Time flies.  I hope everything goes alright with you and your daughter's move.  I'm glad you realize that you and dh have to be separate.  He's letting you hold his money now, but you know that when the move is over, he may not be able to hold onto it without going out and getting high.  But, remember that's not your problem.  Just stay strong, lady.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #47 on: February 06, 2010, 09:42:59 am »
hi everyone, hope all is fine. miss all of you girls MIA ! just give us a holla sometimes !
Today I have an Aids Awareness Brunch, and I have to sing. Looking forward to be with the sisterhood group, haven't seen some in a while. Betty tried to call you this morning.

Wow looking at the weather, DC and Baltimore hit with a snow storm, guess Moon is snowed in.
Betty have u had more snow??
Mumns Did you have a snow storm?
Well we only had rain, sun comming out today.
Hope all is well, I have a id appointment Tuesday and I haven't gotten my bloodwork done and have missed a few doses. This is because of stress. When I am stressed I don't function well. I must do better. Things are still stressful at home.
Betty you are so right! Dh is trying to buy all this furniture for his  apartment and I'm think he will be in over his head. he tod me he is waiting to look at a studio apt, which wil be better for him,since everything is included, but he is  has to make up his mind soon.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline missy

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #48 on: February 06, 2010, 06:30:47 pm »
Hey Gfs I live in MD too.  We had two feet of snow...OMG.

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #49 on: February 06, 2010, 09:36:56 pm »
 :o OMG Missy, how are you coping??? Wish you the best. They showed it on tv and you couldn't see anything !!!!
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #50 on: February 07, 2010, 07:37:29 am »
Netta, it was good talking to you last night.  I hope that whole mess gets over with soon, and you and your daughter can enjoy the new place.

Missy, I hope you're staying safe in all that snow.  Wow, 2 feet.  Yuck!

Nothing going on with me today, just cleaning. 
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #51 on: February 09, 2010, 03:18:26 pm »
Hey ladies---

I have been a bit busy plus wasn't able to get on much because the OT room was closed at times. I have been meeting with social workers here and at the court. Speaking of court, in family court, my lawyer wants me to drop the order against dickhead because he got a hospital report from somewhere. I don't know how since he never went the night the fight went down or by the time I left. It makes no sense to me. The lawyer is hoping that if I drop mine he will drop his. I seriously doubt that he will because he knows that he has the criminal charge against him.And wants to do anything to make me miserable. If it still goes to trial my lawyer thinks that the judge will look at the fact that I had knives...wtf...the man broke my wrist and choked me out. What was I suppose to do?

Still loving it here and working on getting housing. I am just guessing but maybe I will be in my own place by next month.They work pretty fast here since you can only be here for 3 months. I am also working on getting new hearing aids but can't get evaluated until May. The hospital is booked until then. So, in the meantime, I am going to start learning sign language. I know a lot of the alphabet already except for a few letters. And 2 of my social workers are working on getting me into a class. It sucks trying to hear people and can't. They have a person who comes into our groups and signs but I can't even understand her...*lol*

Well, NY is on alert, we're suppose to be getting 8-14 feet of snow tonight. They are asking everyone not to drive their cars and there is no school tomorrow. I am wondering if I have enough food.Don't get me wrong, I have food but wondering if I should get more. I have been trying to budget my money this month. But even with that food is expensive here, can't wait to be able to get stamps. And to save a few bucks I did my own hair this month. It took me all weekend but I finally got it done on Monday.

Betty--That is cute grandbaby you have. I miss watching the Harry Potter movies, those I don't have in my collection. First thing I have to get when I get out of here is a tv and dvd player. I had tvs when I was back in Pa..Got to start over again.

Netta---Glad dh is letting you hold the money and is good that you can still be civil with each other. I know it is a relief to have the car note paid. Good luck with moving. You still have your pup? Glad you are feeling better, last time you text me, you said you were in a foul mood.

I am counting down the days til Cindy gets married...still wishing I could've been the flower girl... ;) That is about it for me. I just wanted to check in with you all.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #52 on: February 10, 2010, 05:40:17 am »
Queen, it's great to hear from you!  I don't understand your lawyer's reasoning.  And how did dh (dickhead) get a hospital report?  I wonder if he faked something, or maybe did something to himself and said you did it.  I know that sounds crazy, but I've known people like that.    I know you can't wait to get your own place.  I hope that happens for you soon.    I heard about you guys getting snow.  We got 10 inches here so far, with 5 more inches at least predicted.  Of course they didn't close schools, though, because they want people to suffer.  If the schools here are closed, then where I work closes, so you know I was watching the news this morning to see if we were going to get a day off or not.  Not that lucky.  We may leave early, though, depending on how bad it gets.    I hope the sign language thing goes well.  I learned the alphabet when I was in like 4th grade, and still remember most of it.  But, I don't know how to sign words.  I hope you get new hearing aids quick.  I can't even imagine not being able to hear people, that would suck big time.   Thanks for the compliment about my granddaughter.  Yeah, she is cute, and I can't wait to hold her.  I don't know when they'll be able to come home, but I hope soon.  Please keep in touch when you can, and let us know what's going on.  I hope for nothing but the best for you.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #53 on: February 10, 2010, 10:36:57 am »
Hi GF's. I HAVE BEEN GOING THROUGH SOME STUFF!!!!
please keep me in your prayers. I had a big fight Sunday with dh, nothing physical thank God. But I was totally stressed out. He was threatening me and was drunk, I threaten to call the cops and he went off, his sister threatened me on the phone!! Well Friday can't get here soon enough, He is moving. Things have calmed down since then. But i have been  crying and depressed .
I went to the id clinic yesterday and told them whats going on. My doc got on me about missing my meds.I had to do bloodwork. Last blood work sone in November shows I am a heart attack or stroke waitin to happen! yep ! my colesterol and trigyls are threw the roof!
She put me on meds for it, but said she would have to tkae me off them if test show it bothering my liver, which is why I was on them before and taken off them. It is crazy! I also got signed up with River Edge, mental health, for therapy. I was told they may change my anti depressants cause i have been on them so long, 20 years! They also have groups  for women too. Whatever it takes to get me feeling better I wll do. I am also going back to Alanon and Narcanon for families of addicts and alcoholics, this is really a codependency group to me. it helped me years ago .
Thursday I am in a gospel concert for Black World Aids Day, and all money goes to my organization. I hope all is well.

"to thine own self be true"

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #54 on: February 10, 2010, 12:41:51 pm »
Betty, The hospital report thing is what is bothering me too. I know for a fact he never went after the incident occurred or by the time I left him which was about a month later. I was thinking the same thing you were, that he cut himself then went to the hospital. But I am also disturbed because that makes me think his lawyer is lying for him. And I am wondering why my lawyer isn't questioning the validity of the report or looking at the date of when this report took place. It seems all anyone seems concerned with is the fact that I stabbed his tv and cut his clothes. And doesn't it matter that I have a hospital report too showing that he broke my wrist? The law here really sucks and he knows how to manipulate it!

Netta-- I am so sorry that you are still going through all the drama with dh. Now that it is getting close to the time for him to leave, he wants to show his ass. And his sister threatened you, wow, dickhead's sister did the same to me when we were arguing. It didn't matter that he was wrong but as they say blood is thicker than water. You may just have to call the police on him on Friday if he doesn't want to leave. I hope you won't have to and he leaves peacefully.

Well, it finally snowed here and is still coming down. I guess its suppose to continue until 5 pm. My wrist has been aching since last night. I am not planning on going anywhere though I think I have been having a little bit of cabin fever. I want to go out but really have no destination. I am usually worried about getting lost but I put GPS on my phone. So, I kinda want to play with that but I still need a destination... :D

I have been writing to my son. He got in trouble a few weeks ago. He has been demoted and his release date pushed back until May. I feel bad that he can't write me here. I was considering buying a PO box but when you buy them it is for a year. And I won't be in this area that long unless I find an apartment around here.

I hope the other ladies are doing ok. It doesn't look like too many are here anymore. I stay in contact with Snow by text. She has been helping me with some things and she is doing fine. But I often think of the others. That's about it for me...Much love ladies... :-*
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #55 on: February 10, 2010, 04:48:08 pm »
And I am wondering why my lawyer isn't questioning the validity of the report or looking at the date of when this report took place.

You are entitled to, and must, see a copy of this hospital report. Then you have to cross-reference dates against your calendar, documents and anything else you can do to substantiate the validity, accuracy, etc.

You must be as assertive and do as much supplemental legwork/homework as possible whether you have an attorney or not. It can be misleading that attorneys know exactly how to move on things. They don't always and they can screw up, too. Happens ALL the time. You know what happened. You substantiate it. But know this, if he has a document relevant to your case YOU have a right to see it and have a copy of it too.  Make sure you're staying on top of court dates, submission deadlines, everything. Tell him you want to be kept abreast of everything and literally, mark this stuff in your calendar in front of him whenever possible.

A person told me long ago that someone graduates last in every law class---just to help you put it in perspective that you've got skin in the game, you have to work on your own case, too. The system is misleading. AND, if he knows that you are actively participating in this, then he will, likely, hopefully,  be sharper, too---cuz he knows you're paying attention and possibly getting outside information to support your case.
« Last Edit: February 10, 2010, 09:22:35 pm by emeraldize »

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #56 on: February 10, 2010, 05:44:18 pm »
Hi gf's sending pic of Lucy love at 5 months. daughter bought me a new kodak easy share camera.

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« Last Edit: February 10, 2010, 05:52:56 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #57 on: February 10, 2010, 06:01:51 pm »
Netta, wow, I'm so sorry that that happened.  I agree with Queen, he knows his time is up and he wants to do as much as he can to fuck your life up along with his.  Don't let it happen-call the police if you need to.  Don't let him win.  I know you won't, just hang tough.  You puppy is so adorable!

Queen, I hope things get straightened out in your case.  Em seems to have good advice about getting a copy of whatever he has.  Maybe that would help you.  I'm pulling for ya, girl, always.  I hope the snow stops soon so you can play with your GPS.  I don't know what kind of destination you're looking for-Statue of Liberty maybe? :D
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #58 on: February 11, 2010, 03:31:50 pm »
Hey folks......

Em, thanks for your input. My lawyer is a she and a young one at that. I made my concerns known and now have a meeting scheduled with her on the 22nd. I am under the impression that I can't see those hospital records until we go to court. I know for a fact that he had to cut himself and told the hospital or whoever that I did it. Like I said, what is disturbing to me is that the lawyer seems to think the judge will focus on the fact that I pulled knives. The thing about that is I didn't pull the knives to cut him but to damage his prized wide screen tv and clothes after he had threw my cell phone against the wall. And I feel no one is focusing on what he did to me, the broke wrist and being choked unconscience. I did ask what the worse case scenario would be and was told that the order he has on me would stay in place...Umm, doesn't seem like a bad thing to me since I want nothing to do with him anyway. I have no criminal charges against me though I did press criminal charges against him when he threatened to kill me and my son. That's in criminal court and there is no way he can beat that because I kept the texts he sent me. The DA's office also took pictures of those messages. They are offering him a violent offenders charge, domestic violence classes and the criminal order would stay in effect for 2 years.Not really a justifiable punishment if you ask me. He will just use those classes to further manipulate the system. I would think he would have no choice but to plead guilty. Not pleading guilty would only make him look stupid especially when one of the texts he admitted it was him the whole time when he was pretending to be his son-in-law. And he can't use anything from the family court case in the criminal case. I'll just be glad when it is all over so I can get on with my life.

Netta, I got your messages on Yahoo and I am really worried about you. I am hoping things will not turn ugly but from what you told me, it just may.I will be thinking of you and praying for your safety. You don't have any strong men in your family who could have your back? And Lucy looks cute with the ribbons in her hair.

Betty, Hell no I am not going to look for the statue of liberty... :D I'll just wait until I have an appointment somewhere then use the GPS.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
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Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #59 on: February 11, 2010, 06:09:26 pm »
Queen,

You're welcome. Nice that you got a female attorney. I like that. Re: I made my concerns known and now have a meeting scheduled with her on the 22nd. I am under the impression that I can't see those hospital records until we go to court.

Did you specifically ask if the defense attorney has furnished or will be furnishing a copy of the hospital report? To see it the day of court, gives you no opportunity to calmly review it, compare it to your recollection and/or records such as a datebook or other dated documents of yours. You should push on this a bit with her to get a copy in advance of your hearing date.

If your attorney coaches you well, you will present your truth plainly, succinctly and convincingly. I will pass on one tiny piece of advice, when you testify, do not start any sentence with Well, or Weellllll, go straight to the active statement. I did this. I said that. I was grabbed. I was shoved. No 'well' enters the confident presentation of the facts.

You might find out from the phone company if you can get a printed set of the text messages as they'll be easier to read and submit. There may be identifiable marks on them, too, which validate their authenticity. Worth checking into.

It might also be helpful for you, and your attorney, to take a couple of sheets of paper and put a chronology of events together over time. When you met, when you visited NYC, gifts he bought for you, when it was agreed you would move to NYC, what the expectations were, what the domestic scene was like between the two of you, his children, the variables, when did it get nastier? physical? date of broken wrist, any other complications, ramifications in terms of you having to move, the impact of pressing charges, finding counsel and so on. So you have a journal, a document to represent the timeline of events. I assure you, once you do this, something small will pop up while you're on the subway and you'll want to add it in.

I'm encouraging you to do this not as a document to submit as evidence, but as a document that helps reteach you what you went through. Lots of details get blurred over when we are under durress. Further, your attorney might see something that is relevant to her overarching understanding of the context in which your case occurred.

The devil is in the details and so are the angels. You've got the time, girl, grab a spiral-bound notebook at the drug store and reconstruct as best you can. Remember the good stuff, too. That is what took you to NYC.
« Last Edit: February 11, 2010, 06:14:37 pm by emeraldize »

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #60 on: February 12, 2010, 07:22:53 am »
Queen, I hope things go smoothly for you with DH.  Yeah, if he tries getting out of the criminal charge, he'll just look foolish.  I know you want it to be over, and I do too.  Just hang in there, things will go upward. 

Netta, I'm worried about you from what Queen put regarding your messages on Yahoo.  If you have to leave the house to call the cops and have them meet you at your place Friday when dh needs to leave, then do so.  Don't give dh one hint of opportunity to get violent.  Please don't let anything happen to yourself.  I'm going to continue praying for you, lady.

It's cold here this morning, 10F.  We got about a foot of snow in the last few days, but nothing like it is on the East Coast.  One of the ladies I work with is in Dallas for some basketball thing, and she called yesterday and said there's snow there!  And they were expected to get 3-5 inches more.  I guess the whole country's gone crazy weather-wise.                    I wonder how Cindy's doing?  I hope we hear from her after the wedding, with pictures!
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #61 on: February 12, 2010, 01:07:06 pm »
 HI GF"S  We are waiting on it to snow today, Yeah  :D. My dh paid for his effencieny studio apartment today and is moving. Today is my wedding aniversary ! Go Figure, stranger things have happened.  :D hopefully he will get the car running this weekend, or it will be towed to his place. I have been laying kitchen tile at the new house and it is harder than I thought, about to drive me crazy!!!! but i am finished except for 2 edges, around the heat vent. Never again will I do this!!!! This evening I will be painting, No my DD doesn't know a thing about a house and I am teaching her everything!!! lol. The girls picked out the colors for their room. We have that plus a den and dinning and bedroom and living room to paint. At least that is one area I know how to do.
I started showing the house yesterday. Hopefully it will be rented by the end of the month. We are moving the last weekend of this month. I have not even started to pack! My daughters things are in storage so thats not a problem. Her boyfriend and some of his friends will move us. Money is tight,paid rent, mortgage and 500.00 asssociation fees here, and we are not even going to be here ! My dd paid it cause i t was in the lease. I wish and hope we can get something back from the landlord even though we are breaking the lease, i wonder if someone moves right in, are we due our security deposit back??? We are having to rent stove and refrigerator untill the stimulus check comes in May. but we will be alright. Just praying things go smooth with this move.
I have been showing the house, keeping it spotless ! so far 2 families are interested! I told them to move fast, because a lot of people have shown interest.  ;) I think the couple that came last night will get it, because the wife remembered my landlord defended her in a car accident case, so she should be in like flint.!!!! the landlor said he want to get good people in like us  ;D thats a compliment, because I only work with what I have and we really made this house look good since we have been here. Lucy is fine, and my grandbaby who was so scared of her says she is now in love with Lucy! we put her in the fenced back yard at the new house, bricked up the gate so she could not get out, and 5 minutes later she comes running in the new house !!! How she out  I don't know!!! I am so happy ,everyone has fallen in Love with her, even thoguh she is a crazy dog. She follows me everywhere, enven the bathroom and I close the door she gets in! she runs around the house in circles, and if she has an accident on the floor, she runs into her crate and sits there looking silly, because thats where I make her go when I am mad at her going on the carpet.

QUEEN- We have no family here. It's just me and my daughter and the grands. I hope you are doing ok and not worrying about the court thing. I know you will be happy when you get moved into your own. It isgoing to work out, though it may seem like thigns are moving slow. I will be glad to go to conseling on March 1st. I have a lot to get off my chest ,my future depends on me not making the same mistakes  over and over again. Wishing you the best.
BETTY I will talk to you this weekend. I  sure hope Moons wedding goes  ok with the weather and snow. caint wait to here from her.
I am missing all the others who post here. WE MISS YOU! this place has been a blessing to me, I would probly go crazy if I didn't have you all  !!!! :o
UPDATE -HE IS GONE, ALL MOVED! IT IS SNOWING HARD
« Last Edit: February 12, 2010, 06:06:15 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #62 on: February 12, 2010, 07:06:20 pm »
And if you all want a good laugh, read my response to " 22 years and still no valentine" on the LTS forums.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #63 on: February 13, 2010, 07:19:12 am »
Netta

I hope you enjoy Valentine's Day in your new home with those who love you.

Em
« Last Edit: February 13, 2010, 07:23:53 am by emeraldize »

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #64 on: February 13, 2010, 07:46:23 am »
Netta, everything sounds like it's moving in the right direction for you.  I'm so happy, you deserve some peace! 
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #65 on: February 14, 2010, 12:11:13 pm »
Hi gfs, How are you all ! I am ok but tired from painting yesterday and sore. I don't know if its the new colesterol meds ,since they can cause musle pain.
Anyway, I helped my dh move and he was very depressed and crying. i am worried about him. He is living in a hotel effiency. I was suppose to take him shopping Saturday, but have not heard from him.,Tried to call him today also. I hope he is ok and doesn't do anything to hurt himself. I know he is not my responsibilty, but I can't help feeling sorry for him and a little guilty. thats why I am going to conseling. I sugguested he go on his own also. Other than that I am fine. He called me Friday a couple of times and the last call he  was crying and asked if I was going to try and save the marriage and I was honest and told him no it was over, and haven't heard from him since  Really I can't relax untill I know he settled in and fine. He promised me he wouldn't hurt himself. I am praying for him.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #66 on: February 14, 2010, 06:41:41 pm »
Netta, stop that guilt right now!  You are not responsible for him, nor for what happened.  He brought everything on himself.  I remember your call last weekend, where he had your car, and had gone out and fucked up again, knowing what was coming.  It's all him, Netta.  He's an adult man who needs to learn to take care of himself.  I'm sure he thought he was in for a free ride with you, to where he could do anything he wanted.  Just remember, he fucked up (big time), not you.  Sorry I missed your call today, and now I'm getting ready to watch a movie I have to take back tomorrow.  Hopefully we can hook up sometime during the week, or next weekend.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #67 on: February 14, 2010, 11:52:38 pm »
Netta,

To add to what Betty has encouraged...which is givin' up the guilt, I want to share something with you. It's important that you know that nothing you've done or would attempt to do would change dh's behavior one bit if he were inclined to hurt himself, or, kill himself.

I'm attending a suicide bereavement group with a family member. And, what we've learned has been very powerful. You cannot prevent suicide. People speak in terms of suicide prevention, but no one has ever been able to do it. The nurse running the group showed us statistics for our region of the US and said the figures and demographics, with white males in the lead, are consistent and consistent elsewhere in the country.

Further, she said if it were a behavior, there would be changes over time if prevention were possible. It's more akin to a disease than anything else. You might also be interested in knowing that it's racially and gender-wise as follows: white males, then white females, then black males and the smallest number, black females.

So, bottomline, don't worry about anything you decide to do in terms of taking care of yourself having a negative impact upon him. It's nothing you can do anything about, period.

Have a good week enjoying your new home.

Em

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #68 on: February 15, 2010, 12:25:48 pm »
Thanks all for the advice, i guess thats the codependency kicking in. lol.
Well I talk to some friends who said they saw him Sat at the groceries. Alos told me he called in today and did not go to work. Probly because he had no car to take him at 4 am!. It is his fault he didn';t get the car fixed!.Well he tried to call me, but I refuse to answer, as long as I know he is ok.
I have lot sof work to do painting another room today at the new house. yesterday we painted flowers on the wall of the youngest girl's room.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #69 on: February 16, 2010, 05:32:15 pm »
Today is Tuesday and we have 1 week  left to pack and move. It is hard doing somethings without a man, lets face it. ok painting is not going well, easy to paint, just the mess and cleanup, but iam not giving up, I have paint on the ceilings and can't tape them because the ceiling paint comes off! well have a hand edger to cut in with, just can't keep my lines straight! lol .today I found an edger that goes on my paint pole,so wish me luck! oh the colors are lavender, 6 yr olds room, rose shanell room, and purple 12 yr ols room.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #70 on: February 16, 2010, 06:13:56 pm »
Wow, Netta, sounds like you're really doing a whole lot of physical work.  I hope it goes well for you.  I've never painted a room, so I'd be no help.  Glad you're keeping busy, that's a good thing.  Less time to think. ;)  Just keep focusing on the good, lady.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline HollyStar

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #71 on: February 17, 2010, 01:46:12 am »
Hi Ladies,

It's been a while but I've still been reading just about everyday.

Queen, Good Lord woman! You have been put through the wringer. I can't even begin to imagine going through all that you have. I know we don't know each other but I do think about you. I hope you are safe.

Netta, I'm so happy for you that you can start moving on with your life. Life with an addict can be so hard. Now you can focus on you and you family. Keep your chin up.

Betty, I have been watching the news reporting on all the crazy storms. I hope you have a good heater. That's just too cold for me. We got quite a bit of rain at one point but is has been unusually clear and warm here in Cali. How has work been going for you?

Hello to all of the other MIA ladies.

Everything is going fine with me. One of my brothers got arrested again last week and has a $50,000 bail. No one has the money to bail him out and I don't think bailing him out will really help him right now. It's just sad watching this cycle over and over.

Also, my BF just broke his tooth a few minutes ago, poor man! Hopefully the dentist will squeeze him in tomorrow. I have also been taking another online math course. It's definitely getting more difficult. I've run into some stuff that I don't think that I learned in high school or just didn't pay attention. It's good for me though. I need a challenge, I guess, lol. I also started a business, selling eco-friendly products. I'm just getting started but it will be nice to have something to do again. I just have to be careful as I really don't want any possible income to interfere with my medical benefits. Hopefully the worst that will happen will be a small co-pay. Anyway, I've got my fingers crossed! Not much else going on with me. I hope everyone is safe with all this terrible weather.

HollyStar
Diagnosed  July 28th 2003

'I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.' -Diande Ackerman

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Offline missy

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #72 on: February 17, 2010, 08:28:42 pm »
Hey Gfs,
Not MIA, just busy. Working hard and trying to hit the gym at least four times a week. It doesn't leave a lot of time for chatting. Has anyone heard from Cindy, did she get married on Valentines Day?
All is going well for me, still with my new guy.   :D.  Take care and I will check back in soon. 
PS. sometimes I just read to see what everyone is up to miss everyone a lot.  Mary

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #73 on: February 18, 2010, 04:37:12 am »
Holly, the job's going alright, thanks.  I'm more used to the things I need to know on the computer.  It's always interesting, with the mix of people we get in there.  We don't kick people out just because they're drunk or high, unless they start causing a disturbance.  So, I talk to a lot of people every day with various problems.  I try to help who I can, and refer others to the proper place for them to get the help they're seeking.       Sorry about your brother.  It seems like you've mentioned something about him before, I just can't remember.  Did you say he's an addict, or drinks a lot?   Good luck with the new job.  Yeah, I hope you don't have any changes in your insurance coverage.  You have Medicaid, don't you? 

Mary, good to hear from you.  I haven't heard anything from Cindy, I'm guessing she's been busy.  Glad everything's going well for you and the new beau.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Snowangel

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #74 on: February 18, 2010, 01:41:33 pm »
Hi Everyone!
I have been trying to keep up with everyone but haven't been in a good space to post. I have been trying to figure out how I am going to come up with $2500 by next month for my lawyer, and still have enough money to finish the kids room and pay the bills.  I am sick and tired of having no money.  I have been feeling like crap lately.  I have a dull pain on the left side of my head and it seems to hurt more when I lay down. My brain just feels like mush. I am hoping that it is just the stress of everything.  I know around the time I got my Aids diagnosis, I was getting headaches and I had MRI's and cat scans and it turned out to be stress from, you'll never guess....going to court with shitbag.

BT- How are you doing? Your job sounds interesting, how are things going with the lady? I think you posted pics of your grandbaby recently, how adorable!

Netta- Sounds like you are doing a great job on the house.  The pics of your doggy are cute! I am glad you got away from your DH, I know it is hard but try not to think about what he is doing, it is time to think of about you.  Remember that Kwame song, you and only yooooooouuuuuuuuuuu  ;D


Em- You always give such great advice!

Queen- Keep your head up, hopefully I will get ahold of you soon with the 411.

Holly- Sorry to hear about your brother.  Your new business sounds great, hope it goes well for you.

Missy- Good for you, for going to the gym, I wish I had the energy.


Hello to everyone else, I hope everyone is surviving the winter, it seems like everyone is getting snow, except us. :-\

Take care!
Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important

The heaviest thing you can carry is a grudge..

One thing you can give and still keep...is your word.

One thing you can't recycle is wasted time.

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #75 on: February 19, 2010, 06:54:46 am »
Snow, I am so, so sorry you're going through all the money problems.  Financial issues are extremely stressful, and can cause many physical problems, so it wouldn't surprise me if your headaches are a combination of that and shitbag.  Oh, and if you want some snow, you can have all ours here, which right now is a little over a foot.  Nothing compared to the East coast, I know, but yet bothersome at the same time.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #76 on: February 19, 2010, 04:00:19 pm »
Hey Ladies---

Just a quick drive- by....I have been sick over a week now....congested, coughing and blowing my nose with blood mixed in...yuck...I went to the doctors yesterday. I still have to get a chest xray done to make sure it is not pneumonia...I am wondering what the hell good was the pneumonia shot I got last year then if it is pneumonia. I also have scripts for antibiotics and an inhaler since I had wheezing in my lungs. I am going to pick that up soon as I am done here...

I had my first meet with the psychiatrist today...Not bad, I like her and she actually explained to me why I have the problems I do with men. It makes perfect sense too, so I will keep her. Gonna start the meds she prescribed for me tonight, it's a combo, anit-depressant and also to help me sleep. I haven't been sleeping well. I get 5 or 6 hours if I am lucky. I felt good after seeing her so I decided to blog about what is going on without giving too many details(remembered what Em said about that)...Check it out if you want.

Em-- I did do a time line with the social worker from the DA's office. I'll let you know how the meet and greet went.

I have just finally gotten to the point that I refuse to allow this asshole to have any power over me anymore. If I have to drop the family court case, fiiiiiiiine. I still have the criminal court case pending. I just want all this crap over so I can get on with my life. And have fun again. As long as this court things drags out, it slows my progress. I have already had plans to be looking good as hell when I do appear in court in March. I mean I looked good in February but I was a nervous wreck....Excuse my french but FUCK that....and like I love to say 2 tears in a bucket, MOTHERFUCK it....*snaps fingers*

Well TGIF loveys.... :-*
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #77 on: February 19, 2010, 05:24:54 pm »
Hu u doin !!!!
Snow sorry to hear your money woes, I know what you mean  when you get tired of not having any money. I will be praying for you a financial blessing. Are you still going to court ??
Try not  to stress its no good for us.

Queen- I hope you feel better soon. I have been back and forth at the new house, busy. I know you will be glad when all the drama is over, me too. I felt like such a fool today tring to help my husband by giving him a ride as he asked to pay his rent. My daughter and I asked if he would help paint the new house,because he is a painter by trade. He called the other day and told me he would Saturday, and that he got another part time job. I guess he was in a good mood then.
Today when I met him at hisjob at lunch time, he was nice and then he turned on me when he got in the car, real bitter and arguing abou thow bad I treated him, same old crap,  trying to make me feel guilty, so I took him back to work and he jumped outta the car mad! he wlked away without his mail so I threw it at him and left. I was so upset, I couldn't find my way out the campus, lol so he called and told me how to get out, I told him I don't want to argue with him and that I won't need him for anything because of his attitude. I also told him he has no control ove me. I got the papers to sign today from my lawyer to start my divorce.! yeah ! Ironically he told me to start the divorce, he doesn't even know!
I thought we could be civil and friends, but I see that we can't, so I just will leave him alone. Stay otta his way.

Betty- hope to talk to you this weekend.

Everyonr have a nice weekend.
« Last Edit: February 19, 2010, 05:34:31 pm by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #78 on: February 20, 2010, 02:43:45 pm »
Queen, I sure hope you feel better soon.  You don't need that on top of everything else you're going through.  I'm so glad you're ready to just get on with your life.  It's great you're not giving him any power.  And it's great you like the psychiatrist.  So, those things are good, you just need to get better!  I'll add you to my prayer list.  Good to hear from you.

Netta, you have got to stop feeling responsible for that man.  Don't take his calls.  Don't answer at all.  Just let him go, along with all the drama that goes with him.  You need to just move forward, instead of going back. 

There's a girl who belongs to the church I work at who had a double lung transplant 3 weeks ago.  She's still in the hospital in Indianapolis, where she had it done at.  She's had to have 2 more surgeries, and keeps running fevers and getting fluid buildup on her lungs.  She's in her 20's, and has cystic fibrosis.  So, she really needed the transplant.  I so hope she'll pull through this.  Anyway, I'm not doing anything exciting this weekend.  I thought about going to Goodwill, but I got a little tired after cleaning, and just want to stay in.  It's grey and nasty out.  Tomorrow night into Monday we're supposed to get an ice storm that should turn to snow, which will turn back to ice.  I hate those the most.           You all have a good one.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #79 on: February 25, 2010, 05:09:56 pm »
Hey Ladies----

I tell you, Justice is really blind here in NY. I met with my lawyer on Monday. Now she is telling me I could do jail time for slashing his tv. UNFUCKINGBELIEVEABLE!!!!!! For one, this asshole broke my phone first in a jealous rage. Second, how come he can't get any time for breaking my wrist and choking me out. I was told it was because he doesn't have a record. Well, I don't either, so what gives? All this lawyer keeps going on about is what I did to his tv and how he supposedly has hospital records. Never once has she offered to show them to me or even if she has seen them herself. She just says his lawyer says he does...WTF?! I sent her 2 emails both saying how I was not satisfied with her. And to me she seems to be working for asshole more than me. Of course, I got the "I am sorry you feel like that" crap. She said she wanted to meet with me again...For what? She just saw me on Monday and if asshole does not want to drop the order she can email that to me. I told her there was no need for us to meet again and that if he did not want to drop his order that I will be wanting a new lawyer. When I told my case worker here about it, she could not believe it herself. She wants to talk to the lawyer too so I left the lawyer a vm telling her that it is alright to talk to her about the case. She'll prolly say she need it in writing but I said the same thing in the email. That is in writing is it not? Man, this is starting to piss me off all over again.

I am feeling much better. I am still using the inhaler which is helping with my coughing. I have also stopped smoking. The doctor gave me some Wellbutrin that seems to be working. The other day I tried to smoke a cigarette and felt sick to my stomach. I still have cigs but no urge to smoke them. So far so good.

Wow, this thread is taking a long time to get to 100 posts...See, now if I was around more I would whip you ladies into shape about writing.....j/k....I know you all have lives while I am trying to get mine back on track.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
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Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #80 on: February 25, 2010, 05:15:25 pm »
Queen, I can't believe the lawyer's telling you that you could do time for that dickhead's t.v.   What a joke!  He should be doing time for what he did.  I so hope this gets worked out.  I think about you, and pray you're days are becoming easier.  And you quit smoking, eh?  Wow!  That's quite an accomplishment!  Congrats.  Here's hoping for better and better days.

Edited to add:  Queen, I know how it feels to have the law make the innocent person look like the criminal.  When I was 15, I went to be with this guy I was going with.  I ended up getting abducted and raped and beaten for 3 days.  When I finally was returned home, the police convinced my parents not to press charges.  They told my parents that I would be made to look guilty, made to look like I instigated it.  I don't understand the law (cops, lawyers) sometimes.  They're supposed to put away the criminal and help the victim, not the other way around.  Just hang in there, lady.
« Last Edit: February 25, 2010, 07:18:59 pm by BT65 »
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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #81 on: February 26, 2010, 10:13:24 am »
 QUEEN - I am so sorry you are going through this. I t doesn't make since, again I say demand to see his hospital records like Emeralize told you, compair the dates to the nite you left and fought to the date he went to the hospital, I don't think he went right away, but who knows ??? You have to make your voice heard, Remeber I told you ot tell them your Hiv status, this could help you NOTget incarcerated , I know you don't want to, but it also could help you get a better lawyer or this one to get charged with discrimination !!!!, remember you are disabled and take meds to sustain your life, all this ' has to be factored in you being sent to jail. I would also contact an ASO today and tell them what is going on , they may have their own lawyer for free. Good Luck ! praying for you also, but its time to pull out the big guns, if you need me for a character refference or talk to someone for you let me know.

I am busy packing and cleaning for our move Saturday. It is going slow, tired. Painting all done, dining room was the hardest cause it was a burganlize,,red and took 3 coats and still looks  spotty. I am done.
Ok my dick head hubby had the only keys to the caddy so I went and got them while he was at work. apparently he gave permission for me to enter his room, he told me they were in the drawer, I found them after opening the wrong draw and finding  a condom ! LOL yeah he is getting his grind on with some one. I also told him I have filed for a divorce and needed his address which I got . My lawyer said it would be better if he got served, then asking him to sign the divorce papers. Also I bought him a computer when he was in school online, which he is no more, he quit. I think I have a right to keep it, he says no cause it was a gift, but I am not giving it to him.
I also have to have the car towed to my new home, because I can't leave it here, People will be moving in here  asap, soon as we move out ! also the landlord agreed to give us back our security deposit, providing house in good shape. Only thing isn't is the carpwt which is berber and we have tried to clean, and it has to be professionally cleaned.,Of coursed it is a light beige, and witl LUcy having her accidents it has spots all over, that I have cleaned but the stain is still there. I am tired of spending money on pet spot remover, that don't work.! Anyhow Keep us in prayer that the move goes smooth .
It sure is taking a long time to get this thread ended. Where is evderybody ??

Betty- Hows the weather  ??? are  you getting slamed with snow??? stay warm. Do you go to work when it snows ???

 MOON- holla at us , by now you should be on your honeymoon, Congrats !!!! send us pics.

Snow- how vare you doing ??? hope all is well.

Everyone have a nice weekend.
Minimom we miss you., Vivt, Emeraldlize, Tendai, Wishfull, , Keep faith, Camille 07, Annibec, no.1 mom., Winnipoo.
SHOUT OUT TO YOU ALL !
Wonder what happend to Drag ????

« Last Edit: February 26, 2010, 10:40:33 am by netta »
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Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #82 on: February 26, 2010, 03:57:51 pm »
Hey Netta, I was wondering how you were doing, but figured you were probably terribly busy painting. So, your car isn't running?  And I would think you should be able to keep the computer.  hell, you paid for it.  Screw that "gift" thing.  Tell him to kiss your sweet ass.  Anyway, it's snowed on and off, but not as bad as the Northeast is getting hit.  And yes, I have to work when it snows.  I wish we got paid snow days (hee).   I'll be praying your move goes smooth, and that you love your new place.  I wouldn't worry too much about the carpet; most places, landlords consider that normal wear and tear.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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tendai

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #83 on: March 01, 2010, 07:16:55 am »
hi ladies
just poking my head in to say hie
netta - sorry for all the shit dh put you through, he's such a jerk. im glad u've moved on and staying strong
queen - that asshole is more than just an asshole.  i hope your lawyer shapes up and gets him out of your life for good.  good riddance to bad rubbish.
betty - 'half evil' lol.  you certainlly do meet strange people at work (the string guy)
cindy - how was the wedding?

as for me, nothing much is going on.  im going to see my doctor later this week for my new bloods, i hope the meds are making a positive change in my numbers. i also need to ask him why my nails are going black at the bottom.
we're stll together with my guy, its been 9 months now. one day at a time..:-)

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #84 on: March 02, 2010, 05:27:47 pm »
Tendai, so great to hear from you!  We miss you around here.  I think it's great you're still with your guy, congrats!  Stop in more often. :)
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #85 on: March 03, 2010, 08:25:59 pm »
HI GF's, All is well. Moved and unpacking at my daughters new house.wonder how long I'll be here ???? lol. I do plan to get on the waiting list for an income based apartment, no plans on living here  but a year, need and want my own as daughter needs her privacy also. Everythign is going well. takaing time to unpack and organize, I am a caffeine addict. lol Finish painting and everything looks great, have to post pics soon.
Started conseling at River Edge, getting an appointment to see the pysc. about changing my meds.(anti-depressants). Had my intial consult with a conselor name Vanessa who listen to me for 2 hours LOL! But she was very encouraging.
Hope all is well, check back tomorrow.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #86 on: March 04, 2010, 04:32:02 am »
Netta, I think it's great that you started counseling.  I understand about wanting your own place.  I can't wait to see pics of the new place that you painted!
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #87 on: March 04, 2010, 04:36:29 pm »
Hey Ladies----

Now my lawyer is changing her tune. She says she never told me I would go to jail...WTF? So, I guess I just made it up, yeah right. >:( Once again she has scheduled another meeting. I feel it is a waste of time but I will go. She seems to ignore the fact that I said I wanted a new lawyer if he does not drop his order. Still no confirmation on that other then she says his lawyer "believes" he will drop his order. What the hell is that? I will not be surprised if he doesn't. All he wants to do is pay me back for having him get arrested for 24 hours. I am trying not to stress about the situation. 2 of my social workers don't understand my lawyer's logic in wanting me to drop the order in the first place. I emailed my lawyer and told her that I will sign releases for her to talk to them. I just want the crap to be over so I can move on with my life.

Sorry so short...Just wanted to touch bases with you guys...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #88 on: March 05, 2010, 06:09:15 am »
Good to hear from you, Queen.  It sounds, to me at least, like your lawyer changed her tune because you called her on her shit.  Of course she's not going to admit to saying anything ridiculous (like the possibility of you going to jail).  I so hope it works out, and that things can get wrapped  up so you can move on. 

Where is Cindy?  I want pictures!
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #89 on: March 06, 2010, 04:44:10 pm »
Hi GF"s I have been mia because I caught a bug and had to go to the hospital. I was very sick vomitting, diarear , aches and pains and I couldn't pee ! they thought it was my kidneys, but I was so dehydrated they gave me 2 iv fluids.They ran some blood work and said I had a  badvirus that was going around.I am feeling better now, but tired from the move and all. I have been texting with Queen on Friday, I will be glad when this court mess is over and she is in aher on place. trying to stay in touch. I was upset yesterday after geting a nasty phone message from my husband family, saying they wanted to know where he lived and that I was trifiling, and that his mom was worried about him. I don't know why they blame me for everything! Well I did not hear the message till after I talked to her briefly on the phone when she called and ask where he was staying, I told her and she hung up . Apparently his phone is off, she called again today to say they were trying to send him money to get his phone back on, and the hotel didn't give the room number and was rude. I told her I would give his friend who works with him her number so she can call them and not me. i don't even remeber his room number. she was very cordial and before i got a chance to respond to her message she hung up.
He is a grown man with 2 jobs and I am tired of them. Why they are so angry at me?? they know he has a problem. It seems they  want me to baby sit him, thats all.
Well it is very peacefull living without him in my life. I am trying to destress from all this mess and move on. I will be ok thought.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #90 on: March 07, 2010, 12:19:14 pm »
Netta, of course his family wants you to take care of him, so they won't have to deal with it.  I would probably tell them not to call anymore, if they keep bothering you.       Sorry to hear you were so sick.  How are you feeling now?  Please drink plenty of fluids to keep yourself hydrated. 

It's a pretty day here so far.  44F degrees.  It's supposed to rain in awhile, though, but that's alright.  Almost all last week was sunny and in the 40's.  I smell spring!  Of course, it's snowed here before in May, so who knows if we're really done with winter.  Nothing much going on.  Tomorrow starts the work week again.  I hope everyone has a good week.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #91 on: March 07, 2010, 03:02:17 pm »
I smell spring!
  Me, too. Birds are starting to chirp in the morning, too.
Hoo      Ray

Offline missy

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #92 on: March 07, 2010, 03:50:50 pm »
Hey Gfs, just driving by.  I went to the flower and garden show in Baltimore with my honey yesterday.  Yes, spring is in the air. The flowers just made me feel so happy. YIPEEEEE!!
Missy  8)

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #93 on: March 08, 2010, 07:02:45 pm »
Here is a link to my daughters first house pics. I painted all the rooms!!!


http://photos1.walmart.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=3047678003/a=9128634/


file:///C:/Users/VANNETTA/Pictures/2010-03-08/016.JPG
« Last Edit: March 08, 2010, 09:56:22 pm by netta »
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Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #94 on: March 09, 2010, 05:13:50 pm »
Those pics are gorgeous, Netta.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #95 on: March 10, 2010, 12:07:07 pm »
thanks Betty, I am taking it easy, feeling better, so much peace, I can't believe it. I thank God he saw me through all I have been through. I painted the house, and decorated it. This is all my furniture, I gave to my daughter. when I move I will downsize and get only things I need and keep things that really mean something to me.
« Last Edit: March 10, 2010, 12:15:51 pm by netta »
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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #96 on: March 11, 2010, 12:46:31 pm »
where is everyone?????? I am feeling so lonely out here! :'(
what happen to you all, we use to be so close?


Pray for Queen, she had court today. Hoping it all turns out well.
« Last Edit: March 11, 2010, 03:01:29 pm by netta »
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Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #97 on: March 11, 2010, 06:23:45 pm »
Hey Netta, I'm just doing a drive-by.  Please tell Queen I'm thinking about her, and wishing for the best. 

It's been a long week, and the place I work at may be closing in the next couple or few weeks.  That would majorly suck.  Anyway, I hope everyone's alright.  I agree with Netta, where is everybody?
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline emeraldize

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #98 on: March 12, 2010, 03:54:56 am »
... and the place I work at may be closing in the next couple or few weeks.  That would majorly suck. 

Sorry to read this. The good news is you've got more experience on your resume. Can you extract a generic reference letter before it closes up?

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #99 on: March 12, 2010, 06:29:39 am »
Yeah, I could get a reference letter.  The thing is, I've still got the 4 misdemeanors on my criminal history, which is why I wasn't able to find a job before I got the one I have now.  At the place I'm working now, the boss knew me, because I had done a work experience there.  And they didn't do a background check.  So, the history is going to haunt me for a long time.  Indiana doesn't get rid of things on a person's criminal background, ever.  I would have to come up with $1000 to have a lawyer try to do a "post conviction relief."  In Indiana. One of the charges is from Michigan, which doesn't ever delete anything either.  But, if I can ever get rid of the ones in Indiana, that would only leave one thing, which wouldn't be so bad.  And because they were theft, no store will hire me, nor any place where money is involved.  See, when I was strung out this last time, and I went into stores, if I saw something I liked, I thought I was entitled to have it.  Problem was, I was so high, I didn't notice the store employees watching me while I was trying to slip things into my purse.  Anyway, I don't know how much longer the place I work will be open, but it doesn't look good for it financially, at all.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #100 on: March 12, 2010, 10:53:32 am »
Wow Monday, march 15th is my 52 Birthday!!!! Nothing planned as usual. But I have peace of mind.
I am feeling depressed, somehow this happens every year before my birthday.
I haven't heard anything from Queen and I am worried about her. I will try texting her today.

Betty- sorry your job is  closing. I will call you this weekend.

Emeralized- you are so smart, I  like your advice, are you a lawyer? teacher? doctor?
Thanks for being here for us.
I have an apt with the psych on the 22nd about my anti deppresant  zoloff, they may be adding something. i have been taking it for so long, do not want to stop. I will be glad to get a counselor and start conseling after this. I was talking to the counselor last time about going back to   school for art, she encouraged me, since the school is Weslyan and she graduated from it, problem is  i feel dumb taking engllish and math classes, which you must take for a degree.  I don't know if I want a degree,just want to take some painting classes. Another problem is my meds make me sleepy,worried about staying awake in class. I am just plain scared.
What I really want to do is write my book, I had the frist chapter done, a while ago. I do not know what I am doing, need some help. I have been dreaming about writting this book for so long, about my life.
Well i am still lonely here, everyone have a blessed weekend.
excuse my spelling, i am forgeting things a lot. I went to the doctor on Tuesday, but they told me my appointment was on Monday. lol
« Last Edit: March 12, 2010, 10:57:22 am by netta »
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #101 on: March 13, 2010, 09:33:37 am »
Netta, happy early birthday!  You ought to take yourself out to eat, even if it's just some food from a fast food restaurant.  I don't know what kind of food you like, but try to do something nice for yourself.  And I think you'd be great in art classes.  Don't fret about the other classes you may have to take.  You'll be fine once you get into them. 

Today I have a funeral I have to go to, then I have to do some work.  I'm not getting paid for this, mind you.  The food pantry lady is supposed to get some food from a boy scout food drive, and I'm going to help her unload and get it organized.  I'd much rather be doing something else, but I've been told "we're a team," so I can't very well leave her by herself. 

The church's that I work for finances are extremely thin right now.  It takes thousands of dollars for them to operate monthly, and they don't pull in near that amount.  I don't know how long it will be open.  I know people in the community don't want to see it closed, because of the work we do with street people.  But, unless someone sends in a few million, I don't see how it could stay open.  Of course, stranger things have happened.  I don't want to be without work, but sometimes that can't be helped.  So many people have lost their jobs, so I don't feel lonely or anything. 

It's very rainy here, and only 47F.  It was a bit above 60F last week, but in the next couple weeks, it's supposed to get back into the 30's.  It's spring, so weird weather is expected.  Other than that, I'm debating on whether or not to try to get into that program at a local university I was going to go into last fall.  Remember, those of you who were here, I couldn't get into it because it wasn't accredited.  Now it is.  Of course, this would add to my student loan debt.  It's not eligible for a pell grant, because it's master's level classes.  I think it sounds like a good idea, and will be mulling it over for a week.  I hope you all have a good weekend.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline missy

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #102 on: March 13, 2010, 10:33:20 am »
Netta, Happy Birthday!
Sweetie you would do wonderful in art classes.  If your head says try math or English do it, if not just have fun!!! I went to school latter in my life and have never regret ed it.  I have a BA in Environmental Science, like you English was not my forte but I made it through.  Have fun on your special day.  Mary

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #103 on: March 13, 2010, 12:39:03 pm »
Thanks all, did text Queen and she is fine. Lots of rain this weekend, staying in and watching tv and reading. Monday I have a follow up appointment at id clinic talk about my blood work. So far my viral load is down, which is good. As usual I am broke for my birthday, but next weekend ,my dd gets paid so I will go somewhere, maybe to the movies or eat out. i am just blessed to be hear another year. Don't think I'll be going to school ,tired due to meds, but I can paint here at home, just haven'y been in the mood for crafts, even crocheting. Idid talk to my lawyer whom I will see next week about divorce. OMG both cars acting up! my dd  has been using mine, hers needs an alternator, my car is skipping or jumping, maybe just needs a tune up, or my good gas. Its always something isn't it? Glad to be so blessed, peaceful away from my husband. Oh he called and informed me he was not getting back his deposits for the electric and water bills that was in his name and why we didn't pay it! Well we paid the water bill, andhad been paying the electric, when he messed up his monwy so i don't owe him anything. I think a final bill came after we paid. Anyhow He asked what I was going to do about it, I laughed, nothing. He hung up. i told him to tell his folks stop calling me and that they were looking for him to pay his phone bill, he hasn't been in touch and his phone is still off. Not my problem. lol Well the divorce papers will be ready soon, hopefully this week and I think he should get served at work, since he works 2 shifts and probly would not be at his hotel room during the day.
I have to start saving up, for a vacation I badly need. My sister is going to Jamacia this summer, so I am invited, have to get my passport, I have never been anywhere out of the country. Looking forward to it. Everyone be blessed.
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #104 on: March 14, 2010, 01:57:52 pm »
Netta, I know you're going to be so happy when that divorce is final.  I'm glad you're able to experience some peace, that's important.  More important than anything.  Sorry to hear about the cars.  Hopefully it's nothing major with yours.  Sometimes good gas does really make a difference.  The next time you talk to Queen, please tell her I said "hi." 

It's a dreary day here, and only 40F, so it's quite chilly.  I am hearing birds in the morning, though, so spring should be just around the corner. 
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #105 on: March 18, 2010, 02:43:01 pm »
Hey Ladies-----

Just thought I would check in with you all since I have not been on in awhile. I know everyone is wondering what happened since court. Court went fine, we both dropped our orders in family court and an order is still pending in criminal court. But I am not going to mention it anymore. It no longer has anything to do with me and I don't have to go to court anymore.

I am still looking for an apts and my application is in at 10 different places. So, now it is just the waiting game. You all know patience is not my strong suit. Otherwise everything is ok. I went to see the neurologist yesterday. He doesn't think my hearing loss has anything to do with damaged nerves. He thinks it could be because of djaying back in the day. He says he is not for sure so I have to schedule an MRI next week. He'll get it when he comes back from vacation.

Other than that nothing going on......Happy Birthday Netta.......
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline netta

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #106 on: March 19, 2010, 05:59:56 pm »
Hig gfs, nothing much going on, had a nice quiet birhtday, got a cake and some money from my kids. Great! money is spent though I enjoyed it.
Queen good to hear from you, I have been reading and sleeping a lot. Also playing with Lucy who  sleeps when I sleep! lol Well i miss you all and everyone have anice weekend

I am going to pm Moon, anyone hear from her???? hope everything is well.
Betty- how r u?
"to thine own self be true"

Offline BT65

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #107 on: March 19, 2010, 07:18:48 pm »
Queen, great to hear from you.  I'm so glad you don't have to go back to court!  I know you're anxious to get your own place, and I don't blame you.  I know it's going to happen.  I'm pulling for ya, girl.

Netta, I'm glad you had a nice birthday.  How's your mood doing?  Feeling any better?  You were talking about seeing a therapist, so I was wondering.

I went to the doctor today, just to discuss some things.  I used to e-mail him, but he said someone hacked onto their system, so it violted HIPAA (however it's spelled), to use e-mail.  Anyway, he said nothing can be done about my gut, since it all started with Crixivan.  He wants me to get a colonoscopy, because my dad had colon cancer, but I don't have anyone to drive me, so I can't get one done right now.  He also wants me to have a mammogram, which I haven't had done for two years.  Also a pap smear, which Medicare pays for only every two years, and I didn't get one done last year.  A friend of mine told me today that her doctor said that as long as a pap smear is normal, one only needs it done every 3 years.  He also ordered some bloodwork, just the basic stuff. 

I have a couple movies to watch, so I'm not going to be here long.  I hope everyone has a good weekend.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: LADIES THREAD # 69 .HAPPY NEW YEAR, NO MORE FEAR,LESS TEARS
« Reply #108 on: March 20, 2010, 11:28:08 am »
OMG GFs~

I am HERE!  TY Netta for PMing me and Happy Birthday to you!

THIS THREAD IS CLOSED.  I'll start a new one.

~ indy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

 


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