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Author Topic: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:  (Read 3911 times)

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Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« on: October 08, 2009, 03:02:31 pm »
WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
 
Men Are Just Happier People--
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack. 
You can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks and engines. A ten-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
 
No wonder men are happier.
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #1 on: October 08, 2009, 03:24:59 pm »
Men never depressed?  Tell it to the two men I know who, in the throes of LTS depression have halted their HIV medications.  Did I mention one actually died several months ago?  And the remaining one that's alive has wasting issues and is practically homeless.

Basically this is why we still have mortality issues as statistics, but it doesn't seem to get the attention.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #2 on: October 08, 2009, 03:45:50 pm »
Men never depressed?  Tell it to the two men I know who, in the throes of LTS depression have halted their HIV medications.  Did I mention one actually died several months ago?  And the remaining one that's alive has wasting issues and is practically homeless.

Basically this is why we still have mortality issues as statistics, but it doesn't seem to get the attention.

WOW.....I'm sorry the here about, I agree it's a big problem, but, what I posted was suppose to be funny, I'm sorry you didn't find the humor........and if this caused you any discomfort ......... :-*
« Last Edit: October 08, 2009, 03:54:23 pm by denb45 »
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline J.R.E.

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  • Positive since 1985, joined forums 12/03
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #3 on: October 08, 2009, 06:51:35 pm »


Well,  ....I laughed.  I thought it was funny! Got to have some humor in our lives everyday.

Thank whoever, for the Comedy Channel ! 

Ray 8)
Current Meds ; Viramune / Epzicom Eliquis, Diltiazem. Pravastatin 80mg, Ezetimibe. UPDATED 2/18/24
 Tested positive in 1985,.. In October of 2003, My t-cell count was 16, Viral load was over 500,000, Percentage at that time was 5%. I started on  HAART on October 24th, 2003.

 As of Oct 2nd, 2023, Viral load Undetectable.
CD 4 @676 /  CD4 % @ 18 %
Lymphocytes,absolute-3815 (within range)


72 YEARS YOUNG

Offline denb45

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  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #4 on: October 08, 2009, 07:00:12 pm »

Well,  ....I laughed.  I thought it was funny! Got to have some humor in our lives everyday.

Thank whoever, for the Comedy Channel ! 

Ray 8)

Thanks  Ray..........I thought it was funny too  :D
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline dtwpuck

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  • дано мне тело, что мне делать с ним?
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #5 on: October 08, 2009, 07:31:28 pm »
Huh... the writer of this list hasn't had much contact with high maintenance drama queens.
Floating through the void in the caress of two giant pink lobsters named Esmerelda and Keith.

Offline denb45

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  • Posts: 5,048
  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #6 on: October 08, 2009, 07:54:03 pm »
Huh... the writer of this list hasn't had much contact with high maintenance drama queens.


ROFLOL........ aint that the truth, I've know a few in my lifetime, I'm not the writer of this, it was sent to me via email form an old female colleague of mine, I thought it was kinda cute  ::)
« Last Edit: October 08, 2009, 08:03:09 pm by denb45 »
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline dtwpuck

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  • дано мне тело, что мне делать с ним?
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #7 on: October 08, 2009, 08:36:35 pm »
I saw an iteration of this passed around before too.  Actually, I remember another similar joke.  It was one which contained things "men would really like to say to women".  The only one I remember, because I remember thinking it when I was growing up,  was "learn to use a fu**king toilet seat".   

Good times.
Floating through the void in the caress of two giant pink lobsters named Esmerelda and Keith.

Offline denb45

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  • Posts: 5,048
  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #8 on: October 08, 2009, 09:00:03 pm »
I saw an iteration of this passed around before too.  Actually, I remember another similar joke.  It was one which contained things "men would really like to say to women".  The only one I remember, because I remember thinking it when I was growing up,  was "learn to use a fu**king toilet seat".   

Good times.

Don't you just love old office email humor  :D
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline Assurbanipal

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  • Taking a forums break, still see PM's
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #9 on: October 08, 2009, 09:47:37 pm »
... You never have strap problems in public.
...
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
...

What was that about Drummer magazine?  ;)
5/06 VL 1M+, CD4 22, 5% , pneumonia, thrush -- O2 support 2 months, 6/06 +Kaletra/Truvada
9/06 VL 3959 CD4 297 13.5% 12/06 VL <400 CD4 350 15.2% +Pravachol
2007 VL<400, 70, 50 CD4 408-729 16.0% -19.7%
2008 VL UD CD4 468 - 538 16.7% - 24.6% Osteoporosis 11/08 doubled Pravachol, +Calcium/D
02/09 VL 100 CD4 616 23.7% 03/09 VL 130 5/09 VL 100 CD4 540 28.4% +Actonel (osteoporosis) 7/09 VL 130
8/09  new regimen Isentress/Epzicom 9/09 VL UD CD4 621 32.7% 11/09 VL UD CD4 607 26.4% swap Isentress for Prezista/Norvir 12/09 (liver and muscle issues) VL 50
2010 VL UD CD4 573-680 26.1% - 30.9% 12/10 VL 20
2011 VL UD-20 CD4 568-673 24.7%-30.6%
2012 VL UD swap Prezista/Norvir for Reyataz drop statin CD4 768-828 26.7%-30.7%
2014 VL UD - 48
2015 VL 130 Moved to Triumeq

Offline Rev. Moon

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  • Posts: 3,787
  • Smart ass faggot ©
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #10 on: October 08, 2009, 11:02:45 pm »
I got the opposite version of this list at one point from my very girly lesbian best friend:

35 Reasons why it’s good to be a woman:

1. They don’t have to pay for dinner if they want to play hide the hobbit.
2. Other people open doors for them, pull out a chair etc. (well at least the american variety do)
3. They smell nice.
4. They can have long hair and not be a hippy.
5. Make overs.
6. Shoes come in all shapes, colors and varieties just for them.
7. Skirts. Dresses and other beautiful things.
8. Can wear earings and not be questioned on their sexuality.
9. Can cry to get out themselves out of unpleasant situations.
10. Can flirt to get themselves out of unpleasant situations.
11. Can use their boobies to get good discounts on electronic products.
12. It’s ok to use make up to hide any skin imperfections.
13. The answers to their probelms are nearly always found in a tim tam packet.
14. Can wear pink shamelessly.
15. Never have to feel the pain that is being kicked in the balls.
16. Never have to rearrange their testicles while wearing tight pants.
17. Never get their sex organs caught in their zippers while drunk.
18. Can sit and read every time they go to the bathroom.
19. Don't have to run a super-sharp piece of metal over their facial epidermal layer each and every morning of their adult lives.
20. Can bludgeon someone to death with a baseball bat and then get off scot-free by claiming a "hormonal imbalance"
21. Can commit cold-blooded murder and not only get off scot-free, but end up with a book deal and an appearance on Oprah merely by mentioning "years of violent spousal abuse"
22. Aren't forced to compensate for their fathers' lack of childhood sports skills every Saturday morning throughout their formative years.
23. Can spend time alone with Catholic priests, Boy Scout leaders, and Baptist Youth ministers without feeling sexually threatened
24. Don't have to worry much about going bald
25. Have a wide variety of commercial, sweet smelling deodorants for their sex organ.
26. In a moment of anger, can call someone a "cunt" without being exiled and excommunicated from the community of humankind.
27. Know exactly what to do when a child is sick.
28. ALWAYS outlive their husbands.
29. Don't have a freaky, semi-oedipal relationship with their overbearing mothers.
30. Have an astute, innate sense of when to change underwear before it becomes a Petri Dish for bacteria development.
31. Never pull a back muscle screaming at the television during a sports event.
32. Can terminate a bladder emptying event without waiting for 'the shake'.
33. Can tell their doctors anything.
34. Can simulate a perfect, entire sex act with nothing more than ten idle minutes and a zucchini.
35. MULTIPLE ORGASMS

Huh... the writer of this list hasn't had much contact with high maintenance drama queens.

LOL, seriously.
"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

Offline skeebo1969

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  • Posts: 5,931
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #11 on: October 09, 2009, 12:37:49 am »
35. MULTIPLE ORGASMS



It was supposedly some guy who told a woman not to jump a fence and pick the apples.   She does it anyways and  what happens?  They get rewarded with multiple orgasms and longer life spans.  I'll bet my left nut that Janet Reno is God...
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline denb45

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  • Posts: 5,048
  • "1987 Classic Old School POZ+"
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #12 on: October 09, 2009, 10:27:55 am »

35 Reasons why it’s good to be a woman Queen:
"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Offline poz1970

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  • Posts: 482
Re: WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
« Reply #13 on: October 09, 2009, 12:30:52 pm »
I got the opposite version of this list at one point from my very girly lesbian best friend:

35 Reasons why it’s good to be a woman:

1. They don’t have to pay for dinner if they want to play hide the hobbit.
2. Other pe. . . . .  snip . . .



hahahaha, thank  you for this :-D loved it!!

J
"The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to  heterosexuals. That doesn`t mean that God doesn`t love heterosexuals. It`s just that they need more supervision." -- Lynn Lavne

 


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