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Off Topic Forums => Off Topic Forum => Topic started by: Lwood on December 16, 2006, 11:56:54 am

Title: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Lwood on December 16, 2006, 11:56:54 am
OK, I laughed so hard that I soiled myself. This article mentions HIV so I guess its somewhat relevant...

http://www.netscape.com/viewstory/2006/12/15/shock-student-accused-of-putting-semen-in-school-food/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcbs2chicago.com%2Flocal%2Flocal_story_348184146.html&frame=true (http://www.netscape.com/viewstory/2006/12/15/shock-student-accused-of-putting-semen-in-school-food/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fcbs2chicago.com%2Flocal%2Flocal_story_348184146.html&frame=true)

  First it was EColi in the spinach, then TAINTed  :o Green Onions and now its Jiz in the Ranch Dressing.
Personally, Im a Vinaigrette Man. and I never ate in the school cafeteria anyway.
Just a little something for you Vegetarians..


Note: if you watch the vid. of the newscast, he states that injesting semen can transmit HIV, someone really needs to clue this guy in.  Although the question Im left with is "How Did They Find out??? " did the kid confess?
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: RapidRod on December 16, 2006, 12:42:42 pm
His boner with salad dressing on it gave him up.  :D These people are in charge of teaching students, isn't that scary?
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 16, 2006, 01:17:09 pm
Yeah, and I can't wait until we start getting people who see that newscast turning up in Am I.

"But the nice news guy on CBS said it, so it's GOTTA be true!"

Is it against the law to shoot newscasters? OK then, if we can't shoot them, can we strip them and spread salad dressing all over them and make them do their newscast ... er... dressinged like that?

No wonder we so often feel like we're banging our heads on the proverbial wall...  :-\

~sigh~

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Basquo on December 16, 2006, 01:20:30 pm
I just emailed this guy (the reporter, not the student!) I'll let you know if he replies.
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: thunter34 on December 16, 2006, 01:22:34 pm


Please don't watch the salad dressing!  He's very modest...

(OK-  you can 'Boo' me now.  But where else would I ever get the chance to 'toss' out that joke??)
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: alisenjafi on December 16, 2006, 01:43:41 pm
Quote
"An act occurred that could have physically harmed someone at the school, but no one was physically harmed," said Commander Joseph Eversole of the Wheaton Police Department.
?
I saw a porn video where sailors did the same thing. Btw is the student hot,  is he gay- if so I know what Rosie would say. Hey just thinking are the powers that be admitting that HIV education is failing and that all students need to be rtreated as if infected?
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 16, 2006, 01:58:43 pm
Quote
Hey just thinking are the powers that be admitting that HIV education is failing and that all students need to be rtreated as if infected?

Excellent point Johnny, excellent point!
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: pozguy75 on December 16, 2006, 02:05:18 pm
Not sure if I am intrigued or repulsed...hmmm But I did email the reporter as well...we will see...
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Lwood on December 16, 2006, 05:09:26 pm
I seriously was considering sending the reporter/station an Email as well but I figured that someone would point out the rather blatant error to him in short order.  I'm sure that there are plenty of other things that CAN be transmitted, like Hepetitus ( lets work on that spell checker please)  through ingesting semen ( provided ofcourse that the student was in fact carrying it ) but thats another discussion....  Given the widespread audience that this story was given by Netscape News , Im sure that this dipshits inbox is full of Email pointing out his lack of medical knowlege, and the fact that 25+ years into the Epidemic in America , theres still alot of ignorance , even in the news media.  Kinda wish Id sent That Email now. Im sure that I could have kept my use of the term 'Ass Hat' to once within the Communique´...
If the reporter replies to anyone please let us know. Too bad its the weekend, because Im sure that this one would have been all over Late Night  monologues...
We'll probablly never know anything about the student because of his age, but it just goes to show you ,' Dont mess with the Cafeteria Geek '   

I dont agree with the charges that they say will be filed aginst him, sure he should be charged with Something, definitely expelled ( for his own safety if nothing else !!) and probablly prevented fom working in any type of food service industry for as long as possible. It should be interisting to follow..

anyway, that being said, all I can add is that I Love my salad, but I've never LOVED my Salad...

Lwood
who is still sticking with Oil and Vivegar....

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: aupointillimite on December 16, 2006, 05:29:04 pm
Is it just me, or is the article really poorly written?

"But students say it's too late, and everyone knows about the incident already.

And everyone is universally repulsed." 

Everyone is universally repulsed?  Yes, everyone implies universality there, big guy.

"Last week one of those students decided to do the unthinkable when officials say he spiked a container of cafeteria salad dressing with his own semen."

The "unthinkable?"  I mean, come on... "unthinkable" is a word reserved for the goings-on in pedophilia rings... not adolscent pranks. 

Of course, this seems to be a town where people say things like, "An act occurred that could have physically harmed someone at the school, but no one was physically harmed."

Tha has got to be the bulkiest sentence to come out of a human's mouth today.  You can just say, "No one was harmed." 

It wouldn't be so funny, but the whole article is written in this breathless, grandiose tone that makes me really enjoy the mountain being made out of a mole hill. 

Oh, the humanity!

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: livingpositively on December 16, 2006, 11:47:55 pm
Icky...but really damn funny at the same time.

I'm with you Jeromy.  I can't quite decide which side has the greener grass.
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: GSOgymrat on December 17, 2006, 11:33:40 am
"and everyone is universally repulsed."  That about sums it up me me! :P
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: alisenjafi on December 17, 2006, 12:54:09 pm
You guys make me laugh - repulsed and yet I bet you wouldn't mind some Jeromy  rich -n- creamy salad dressing! ::)
Btw when I read the part of doing harm I first thought of the student body- rereading it might mean the student's body!
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 17, 2006, 07:18:38 pm
I wondered if the only student's body at risk of harm was the lad who did the deed... I mean, what if he got a certain appendage stuck in the neck of the salad dressing bottle? How would he explain that one to the school nurse?

And don't tell me none of you wondered how he got his "fluids" in there in the first place!

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: aupointillimite on December 17, 2006, 07:22:06 pm
I mean, what if he got a certain appendage stuck in the neck of the salad dressing bottle?



This is why one should only attempt something like this with a salad dressing that has a lot of oil.  Like Italian, or a vinegarette.

This way, if the unthinkable horror of getting wedged in there occurs, the dressing will lubricate the stuck bits, and then we all live happily ever after.

Of course, if he's sticking his member that far into the bottle... that begs the question... what is he hoping to accomplish?

Is this like American Salad Dressing?

"One time, in the cafeteria..."
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: RapidRod on December 17, 2006, 07:56:41 pm
He was giving a new meaning to "toss the salad w/a twist."
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: ACinKC on December 18, 2006, 05:04:28 pm
Ummm yeah.  One question?


Who didnt notice the little fucker standing on the salad bar with his cock in his hand yelling "TAKE IT ALL BITCH" as spooge shot into the "communal" ranch dressing?

I mean, is this a common sight?
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: alisenjafi on December 18, 2006, 09:22:06 pm
I wrote the dude about the misinfo- here is his reply:
thanks for your comment.  i have sent your concerns on to my bosses.  they requested that i say what i did about how ingesting semen has been known to spread hiv and std's.  i realize that taken in context of the story how what i said could be misconstrued.  apparently, my producers uncovered evidence that ingesting semen has caused the transmission of hiv and stds.  that's why they had me add that info. to the tag.
 
i agree the chances are next to nil that any of those kids would contract hiv.  but the health dept. is testing the student for hiv and all std's.  if he's found to be positive, they'll then likely urge students to be tested.  i hope this helps.  if you still have concerns, please feel free to call me at 312-446-5857.
 
thanks for your informed commentary.  m
Shall I send him the link to aidsmeds? Or have Ann straighten him out?
Johnny
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: gvolts5 on December 18, 2006, 11:20:50 pm
Sounds like the reporter's bosses/producers want to create a scare.  The added sensationalism will sell more papers.  Still, the psychological question remains; why would a kid do that?  Lucky it wasn't poison. 

John

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 19, 2006, 08:56:33 am
Or have Ann straighten him out?
Johnny

~rolls up sleeves~

Bring him on!  >:(
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: alisenjafi on December 19, 2006, 10:40:55 am
~rolls up sleeves~

Bring him on!  >:(

You just know we will see them posting in  "AM I Infected" !

Sounds like the reporter's bosses/producers want to create a scare.  The added sensationalism will sell more papers.  Still, the psychological question remains; why would a kid do that?  Lucky it wasn't poison. 

John



And what about the ignorance of the officer ? Maybe law inforcement also needs to bone up on transmission- another job for SUPER ANN
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 19, 2006, 10:47:12 am
Well, the thing is, somebody didn't do their homework and should be given a month's detention.

While there have been (fairly rare) cases of people becoming infected through ingesting semen when it's come directly out of a penis and into a mouth, there has NEVER been a case of someone being infected through semen in FOOD. The virus is just too fragile to survive, in an infectable form, outside the body. The ingredients in the salad dressing would have damaged the virus beyond all hope of being infectious within seconds.

Yep, it's just unnecessary scare-mongering. >:(

Ann
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 19, 2006, 11:44:43 am
Johnny,

The more I think about this, the more pissed off I get.

What's that guy's email addy? Time to fire one off I think....

Thanks in advance...

Ann
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: thunter34 on December 19, 2006, 11:52:08 am
Yeee-Ha !!!  I am feelin' this one! 


Ann, you will copy and paste for us here, of course? 


This deserves some choice words, Ann-style.

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: ACinKC on December 19, 2006, 12:01:01 pm
I feel one of THESE coming on!!!!

(http://www.geocities.com/icebergslim3578/Slap.JPG)
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: livingpositively on December 19, 2006, 06:34:10 pm
GIVE 'EM HELL, ANN!!!
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Lisa on December 19, 2006, 07:20:13 pm
There isn't a lobotomy big enough to claw the ick of that mental image out of my brain. Ew !  :-X

Lisa
(who sticks faithfully to her Zesty Italian dressing)


......though I did feed my ex- hubby a catfood sandwich once....and he liked it, and asked for another. Maybe it is all in the condiments after all....... ::)
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 19, 2006, 07:35:49 pm
Um, I'm probably being dense, but I can't find the guy's email address and Johnny never told me. :(

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: HIVworker on December 19, 2006, 07:36:52 pm
alisenjafi,

Thank you for writing to them - and as you started the correspondence, could you send them another one? Ask them for the article that says that people got HIV from eating semen in food or an article that says semen can remain infectious for hours after ejaculation. Point out to them, if you haven't already, that this article does nothing to educate people about HIV and merely increases the paranoia that surrounds the disease - widening the gap that already exists from previous fatally flawed journalism.

That or just tell them to fuck off.

On a more serious note, I can also pen a letter to them.

Rich
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: thunter34 on December 19, 2006, 07:51:35 pm
Um, I'm probably being dense, but I can't find the guy's email address and Johnny never told me. :(



Ann,

If you click thru the original story link from Lwood, you can click on Mike P's name to get to a contact page.  It seems to be kept intentionally cryptic.  Go figure.  Also looks like you have a 6,000 character maximum.  You can do a lot with 6,000 character, though.  There may be some better way to send a response, but I haven't discovered it yet here.

Tim
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 19, 2006, 08:32:47 pm
Thanks Tim.

Too tired tonight to write it (1:30am), but I'll get on it in the morning. ;D

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: alisenjafi on December 19, 2006, 08:51:04 pm
Tim gets a star! Yes  if you go to Mike's name under the headline it is the link.

In fairness he does seem like a nice man whom was forced into turning this into something  it wasn't - shock and awe. My letter  reflected what i said here about the ignorance of HIV transmission and the failure of this administration to educate - not only our youth but even journalists.

You all have read the reply where he does place some onus on his boss- which I think is a bit of a cop out.
Quote
i have sent your concerns on to my bosses.  they requested that i say what i did about how ingesting semen has been known to spread hiv and std's.
I actually thought  some others had written him and wonder what their responses are.

Okay should we start a thread and have everyone write to him and his bosses as well as the officer and tell them except for public nuisance ( or what ever the charge for wanking in the dressing) is that this is not a health hazard. I kind of get the feeling that there is some lawsuit pending which is why they are doing this.
He is open to discussion  as he gave his phone number:
Quote
if you still have concerns, please feel free to call me at 312-446-5857.
and his e mail address is :
MJPuccinelli@cbs.com

Not to sound like I am copping out but maybe we should get the big cannons out- people with more credentials than me.  I also think we  shouldn't alienate him but try and get him to do a piece on the mis info of HIV transmission.

What I find ironic here is Chaplinguy had touched on this very concern in his post "Why we are losing the media war on U.S. AIDS prevention "
http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=6701.0

Okay now I am a little lost on the next step, should I write him, back should others get involved, should we get the experts and no problem with using my name as the reference if they want- I am not sure the best way forward so people let me know!

Hey i just thought , I believe you can sue someone if they give out erronious info  such as this, maybe a class action suit against CBS news and that police force for issuing misinfo.
I am going to bring it up to the guys at GMHC as well-
what do you all think?
Johnny
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 19, 2006, 09:14:29 pm
Yes!

I've taken your thoughts on board Johnny and I'll let you guys know what I write tomorrow. I want to do it when I'm fresh (ok, fresh as in after being hooked up to my intravenous coffee) and not tired and cranky like I am now.

And thanks for his email addy, I hate using those wanky reply boxes on websites. I may even ring him up via Skype.

Ann
(who should be in bed...)

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: thunter34 on December 19, 2006, 09:38:06 pm
Damn!  One of those times when it woulda been handy to have my ex still around.  (He worked for CNN, and knew how to get ahold of EVERYBODY)  We aren't really, um...on each other's speed dial anymore.
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Lwood on December 20, 2006, 09:35:21 am
Perhaps someone could prod Matty into adding his unique people skills to this , although Ann has a certain way with dense people... it would be a Tag Team match worthy of the WWF.  (http://www.planetsmilies.com/smilies/party/party0052.gif)
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Andy Velez on December 20, 2006, 10:33:02 am
Wondering what goes into Paul Newman's salad dressing. I never read labels.

If this latest one gets bottled and sold, I'm thinking of what it should be called. UNIVERSALLY REPULSIVE doesn't quite do it. 
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: RapidRod on December 20, 2006, 01:36:03 pm
Rancho La Semen. 100% 0 Carbs and Fat Free.
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: HIVworker on December 20, 2006, 03:22:46 pm
Spunk-u-like?
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 20, 2006, 08:26:38 pm
It's pretty obvious really...

RAUNCH dressing. :D

I didn't write to that guy today. Been feeling like crap on a stick - banging headache and PMS.  >:( Didn't think it would be a good day to do it. Hopefully tomorrow. ::)

Ann
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Longislander on December 20, 2006, 08:52:49 pm
Quote
banging headache


this month's Men's Health mag lists banging as a good thing for a headache....

no lie.

Paul (who hopes you feel better soon)
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: AtomicA on December 21, 2006, 02:40:39 am
Ann, your blog let me get to know you, but this thread has made it clear - you are my hero!

I once met a guy who had a serious fettish for people spooging on his food. he also had a fetish for people peeing in his ass. That was a one night stand that didn't last the night. People are gross.

However, I personally think it's hilarious, next thing you know they'll have the girls who ate it get pregnancy tests...
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: J.R.E. on December 21, 2006, 09:06:13 am
 :o

Could have been much worse. He could have stuck his pecker in the "Salad Shooter" ! OUCH



Ray ;)
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: ACinKC on December 21, 2006, 09:59:53 am
I heard thats his new NICKNAME!!!

SALAD SHOOTER!
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: David_CA on December 21, 2006, 10:07:22 am

Please don't watch the salad dressing!  He's very modest...

(OK-  you can 'Boo' me now.  But where else would I ever get the chance to 'toss' out that joke??)

So Tim, you like to toss a salad joke whenever you can, eh?   ;)  I think the spooge in the dressing is hilarious!

D
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: RapidRod on December 21, 2006, 10:08:50 am
I like the Salad Shooter.  :)
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: allopathicholistic on December 21, 2006, 10:17:00 am
I heard thats his new NICKNAME!!!

SALAD SHOOTER!

 :D  :D LOL!!!! now i have the tv commercial in my head
(http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l153/aycm8620/musicnotes.jpg) (http://i6.ebayimg.com/05/i/06/53/37/ed_1_b.JPG) (http://i95.photobucket.com/albums/l153/aycm8620/musicnotes.jpg)
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Boo Radley on December 21, 2006, 10:27:39 am
I managed to avoid this thread because of my aversion to Mickie Dee's and the term "special sauce (which I know isn't Secret Sauce but it's too close for my comfort)."  I wish I could return to that state of ignorance.

You people are sick.

Boo
Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: Ann on December 21, 2006, 11:44:45 am

You people are sick.

Boo

Best compliment I've had all day! ;D

Title: Re: Student Whips up a Little 'Secret Sauce' for the Holiday...
Post by: thunter34 on December 21, 2006, 11:52:04 am
Oh, my....I see this thread has taken a sudden and drastic turn for the worse...which is really saying something when you consider the point it started from!

Looks like I've found a new place to hang out!  Yee-ha!