Author Topic: this a risk? (Read 18652 times)

v10guy · « **on:** August 01, 2007, 03:40:05 pm »

I visited a massage place yesterday. A very nice one. The lady there is very neat and tidy, uses rubbing alcohol on everything, the table, etc. I had protected intercourse with her. Afterwards she even checked the condom on me to make sure it held, etc. She said she always uses protection.

I've had quite a bit of anxiety over the whole deal. I don't know why I had that weakness to do that and cheat on my wife. I'm now having some concern that I could've been exposed to HIV. She assured me she is 100% clean. This is the only other person I've ever been with besides my wife, and this will be the last time I do this. I've read other posts, etc. I know the condom is a great barrier from transmitting diseases.

I don't have anything to worry about as far as HIV, correct? No need to test, no risk for my wife, etc? I just feel like I deserve it after what I did, I know this is guilt.

Please, respond.

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #1 on:** August 01, 2007, 04:27:47 pm »

No you don't have to be worried about having contracted HIV as a result of this sexual encounter. You did the right thing and had protected sex. You should take the time to read our Welcome Thread which contains links to our lessons on HIV transmission.

I don't have anything to worry about as far as HIV, correct? No need to test, no risk for my wife, etc? I just feel like I deserve it after what I did, I know this is guilt.

This is most certainly about guilt. HIV is just a virus, not a punishment doled out to those who do "wicked" things.

MtD

Andy Velez · « **Reply #2 on:** August 01, 2007, 05:16:53 pm »

V, as far as HIV is concerned you have no cause to be worrying. Condoms provide very effective protection. Even when you're a dog like the rest of us and you go straying. Condoms do the job so HIV tranmission is not the issue here.

Your guilt is a whole other matter. You can't undo this bit of your history, not even by wailing and suffering guilt over it. In fact that's no tribute to your higher character nor a love bouquet for your wife. It's just drama and self-indulgence. The best thing you can do for everyone concern is take a breath, accept that you did what you did, let it go and get on with your life. Really.

And there's no need for testing nor for further huffing and puffing about HIV this time. You weren't at risk.

Cheers,

v10guy · « **Reply #3 on:** August 01, 2007, 06:58:01 pm »

so, if I go on with my life and be the best husband I can be, there's no way HIV will be an issue due to this situation?

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #4 on:** August 01, 2007, 07:30:48 pm »

You could be the worst bastard under the sun and HIV still won't be an issue because you visited this sex worker.

MtD

v10guy · « **Reply #5 on:** August 01, 2007, 08:57:42 pm »

mtd, what do you mean? Are you saying that even tho I visited this sw, I couldn't have gotten HIV this way?

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #6 on:** August 01, 2007, 09:06:32 pm »

That's exactly what I'm saying mate. It doesn't matter that this woman is a sex worker. HIV doesn't care who people are. It's all about what people do.

You had protected sex. HIV is transmitted via unprotected anal and vaginal sex. You haven't contracted HIV because of this sexual encounter.

As for your guilt, well that's not something we can help you with.

MtD

v10guy · « **Reply #7 on:** August 01, 2007, 09:50:39 pm »

k, thanks for the help everyone. I'm going to work on making the best out of my mistake. Whenever I start to panic about the risk of HIV from it, I'll remember what you guys have reassured me of, NO RISK.

thanks.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #8 on:** August 02, 2007, 08:42:44 am »

You're welcome. And that's a good plan -- reminding yourself NO RISK. Really.

v10guy · « **Reply #9 on:** September 05, 2007, 12:38:27 am »

met a provider... she gave me HJ, I fingered her. She touched herself when I was putting my fingers in her, then she touched my penis again. I was fingering her pretty deep too... No Risk?

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #10 on:** September 05, 2007, 12:45:01 am »

V,

Please keep all your additional thoughts, questions and comments in your original thread. This helps us to follow your story and give you the most accurate advice.

If you cannot find your original thread click on the red link I've provided above. Alternatively click on the "show own posts" link in the left hand column of any forums page. Please note that your questions will not be answered until you return to your original thread.

MtD

Ann · « **Reply #11 on:** September 05, 2007, 04:43:05 am »

v,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

You did not have a risk for hiv infection. Mutual masturbation is not a risk. Never has been, never will be, and you won't be the first to become infected in this way, no matter what sort of spin you can think of to put on your situation.

No risk.

Ann

v10guy · « **Reply #12 on:** September 05, 2007, 08:56:10 am »

forgive me for reposting, my own ignorance for not reading the rules....sorry.

So, even if she had a little juice from herself on her hand and touched my 'head', there's NO risk? Only thing she did is touch the outside of her vagina, maybe a little bit on the inside. I won't drag this out, just wanting to make sure I didn't have a risk...

thanks.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #13 on:** September 05, 2007, 09:32:27 am »

NO RISK NO RISK NO RISK NO RISK NO RISK NO RISK NO RISK NO RISK NO RISK NO RISK

Get it!!!

Even IF she was HIV+, the vaginal fluids which could be of concern would be significantly further up in the vaginal cavity in the cervical area, which would not be where her fingers were touching herself. And you won't history by becoming the first to become infected from wet fingers on your johnson. Really!

Get on with your life.

Ann · « **Reply #14 on:** September 05, 2007, 09:36:06 am »

v,

Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus that is primarily transmitted INSIDE the human body, as in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. When hiv finds itself outside the body, small changes in temperature, moisture content and pH levels quickly damage the outer covering of the virus. This outer covering MUST be intact and undamaged in order for it to be able to latch onto a very few, specific cell types and infect.

As I said to you before, mutual masturbation is NOT a risk. Never has been, never will be, and you won't be the first to become infected in this way, no matter what sort of spin you can think of to put on your situation.

Ann

v10guy · « **Reply #15 on:** September 05, 2007, 10:44:22 am »

So, I shouldn't think that maybe since I had my fingers way up there, some of that fluid could have gotten on her fingers and on my unit?

Ann · « **Reply #16 on:** September 05, 2007, 10:46:26 am »

v,

Unless your "unit" was "up there" without a condom on, you didn't have a risk.

One more time, you had NO RISK.

Ann

v10guy · « **Reply #17 on:** September 05, 2007, 11:25:31 am »

I can be 100% assured that from this situation, I had NO RISK?

v10guy · « **Reply #18 on:** September 05, 2007, 01:12:36 pm »

please?

Ann · « **Reply #19 on:** September 05, 2007, 01:28:52 pm »

v,

How many times do you expect us to say NO RISK? No risk means just that; no risk.

If you read the Welcome Thread like you're supposed to, you would have read the following:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Please consider yourself warned.

Ann

v10guy · « **Reply #20 on:** September 05, 2007, 02:23:17 pm »

k, sorry, I'll try and get over my anxieties about it and trust you, then I'll be fine!

v10guy · « **Reply #21 on:** September 05, 2007, 08:45:02 pm »

look, I don't want to be a pain, or defiant to the rules, I don't want to be banned either. I'm sorry. Ann and Andy, I just get even more concerned when I read about how you say that the virus has certain requirements, like it's way up high in the cervix of the vag. Like how the temp, ph, etc matteres.

I just am really worried that some of that fluid could have been lower in her vag or gotten on her hand, how it could've been on her hand. You guys kinda get me worried by telling me the different ways it could work. I know you have repeatedly said that I have no risk, while telling me how it's transmitted.

I won't ask again, I really promise, but regardless of any fluid she had on her hand, regardless of anything, I had 100% NO RISK? PLEASE? I am anxious/guilty about it. Please.

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #22 on:** September 05, 2007, 09:58:16 pm »

V,

Why on earth would we tell you that you weren't at risk if we thought otherwise? Let me spell this out once more for you:

YOU WERE NOT AT RISK. YOU DO NOT HAVE HIV.

MtD

v10guy · « **Reply #23 on:** November 10, 2007, 05:08:18 pm »

k, I had a previous topic that says it's 60 days old and for me to consider starting a new topic...So, hopefully I'm not going to piss anyone off for starting a new one...

Had an experience last thursday with a SW. She gave me an HJ, I fingered her. I know a normal HJ isn't a risk, but, during the process due to some of our conversation, she opened her drawer of her dresser and showed me her dildo. We didn't do anything with it, she put it back in the drawer. She had it in her hand for only a few seconds. She then continued with the HJ. This a risk? I got kinda worried about it, so I asked her when she used it last, she said like 4 days prior and that she always washes it.

Can I be rest assured this was no risk? Today I've had some nasal drainage.

thanks.

anniebc · « **Reply #24 on:** November 10, 2007, 05:22:16 pm »

No risk whatsoever...if you have nasal drainage then you probably have no more than a head cold.

Please read the Welcome Thread and follow the lessons on how HIV is transmitted.

Jan

Andy Velez · « **Reply #25 on:** November 10, 2007, 05:34:25 pm »

I've merged your latest thread with your previous ones. We ask that members keep all of their entries in the same thread. Thanks for your cooperation with this request.

As for this latest incident, there was absolutely no risk of transmission in the situation you have described. HIV is a fragile virus. Even if she had used the dildo with someone who was HIV+ the virus would almost immediately have become non-viable once it was removed from someone else's anus or wherever it was being used, if in fact there were even any fluids on it.

You are worrying needlessly. There's no need for testing. And if you are having any persistent physical concerns that's something to discuss with your doctor. It has nothing to do with HIV.

Cheers,

v10guy · « **Reply #26 on:** November 10, 2007, 05:44:55 pm »

niether her nor I used the dildo...all she did was pull it out of the dresser and showed me it for a few seconds and then put it back and went back to giving me a HJ.

So, I can be completely rest assured, NO risk?

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #27 on:** November 10, 2007, 05:58:43 pm »

No. Being shown a dildo will not give you HIV.

MtD

v10guy · « **Reply #28 on:** November 10, 2007, 06:08:10 pm »

mtd, I know you can't get it that way. I was more asking if that she had touched it and then touched me...

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #29 on:** November 10, 2007, 06:17:16 pm »

Even then, you weren't at risk.

Are you familiar with our posting guidelines? I hope you are, you can find them in the Welcome Thread. You should pay particular attention to this one:

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Are you following me kid?

MtD

v10guy · « **Reply #30 on:** November 10, 2007, 06:20:06 pm »

ok, so, I will not ever need to worry again about this situation and HIV, correct?

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #31 on:** November 10, 2007, 06:22:03 pm »

GODAMMIT THAT'S CORRECT!!

How many times do we have to tell you?

MtD

v10guy · « **Reply #32 on:** November 10, 2007, 08:18:32 pm »

I do have anxiety over it. I know it's probably guilt. I apologize that you have had to tell me repeatedly. I was there a good 15 minutes or so before she picked it up. I am pretty sure it was dry, it looked like it.

So, I will try and tell my mind to trust you guys, if there was ANY chance, you guys would say so, you've told me I have nothing to worry about...

thanks.

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #33 on:** November 10, 2007, 08:32:05 pm »

Seriously, post about this dildo stuff again and you will be reported.

MtD

v10guy · « **Reply #34 on:** November 10, 2007, 08:36:13 pm »

mtd,

why are you having such a hard time with me? You haven't even told me I had no risk.

v10guy · « **Reply #35 on:** November 10, 2007, 09:17:10 pm »

Andy, no risk, period, correct?

v10guy · « **Reply #36 on:** November 11, 2007, 10:23:49 am »

Andy, Absolutely no risk, correct? I was there a good 15 minutes or so before she picked it up. I am pretty sure it was dry, it looked like it.

anniebc · « **Reply #37 on:** November 11, 2007, 03:58:23 pm »

Look here you have been told numerous times you were not at risk but you are still not listening..I'm giving you a 28 day TO so you can think about what you have been told..put it to rest and get on with your life.

Just so you know the reasons for the TO, this is a paragraph from the Posting guides line, which you obviously haven't read.

*Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.*

Jan

v10guy · « **Reply #38 on:** June 17, 2008, 01:14:30 am »

Ok, I'm combining it with my previous posts

All, I had an experience tonite with a sw. I recieved a covered bj(I know, no risk) what I am concerned about is I was fingering her during this in her vagina and rectim. Afterwords, when her and I was washing up, I noticed I have a hangnail under my cuticle. It's about the size of a pin head and pretty red in the middle of my fingernail. I picked at it a little bit. It's not activly bleeding, but definitely red. Is is possible that I could've gotten HIV from this? HELP!?!?

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #39 on:** June 17, 2008, 01:21:42 am »

Thank you for returning to your original thread.

V, we've been through this with you before. Fingering is not a risk for HIV transmission. You do not need to worry or be tested for HIV.

MtD

v10guy · « **Reply #40 on:** June 17, 2008, 01:32:27 am »

mtd, thanks for the response. So, even with the cuticle hangnail that could've been bleeing, NO Possibility of HIV at all? Forget it period?

Matty the Damned · « **Reply #41 on:** June 17, 2008, 01:37:34 am »

Yes V. Forget it.

I don't have to start quoting the Welcome Thread at you, do I?

MtD

v10guy · « **Reply #42 on:** June 17, 2008, 02:07:45 am »

thanks MTD. I'll try and convince my anxiety that I had no risk... 100% assured, no risk regardless of hangnail?

v10guy · « **Reply #43 on:** June 17, 2008, 08:41:14 am »

Ann, others?

Ann · « **Reply #44 on:** June 17, 2008, 12:09:09 pm »

v,

You've been told repeatedly about fingering and how it's not a risk for hiv infection. Hangnails do not change that fact.

If you insist on going on repeatedly about this latest no-risk incident, you'll be timed out again - this time for 56 days. Please consider yourself warned.

Ann

v10guy · « **Reply #45 on:** June 04, 2011, 07:57:25 pm »

Hi there, Been a while since I've been here. Had some anxiety lately about having HIV. I had sex recently with a SW. Used a condom, was very careful about it. It didn't break. Was worn properly and taken off properly. I know it's a good barrier, but I worry about that small percentage of getting HIV. What are the odds of getting it from vaginal intercourse with a SW using a condom? Are there accurate reports of infection that way?

Andy Velez · « **Reply #46 on:** June 04, 2011, 10:18:07 pm »

Forget about so-called odds. You used a condom. That's exactly what you are supposed to do. Stop indulging in unnecessary fretting. As long as you always use a condom for vaginal/anal intercourse, it doesn't matter whether you are with a pro or a civilian. You will be well protected against the sexual transmission of HIV.

Period.

v10guy · « **Reply #47 on:** June 04, 2011, 10:22:39 pm »

so, no risk? stop worrying??

Andy Velez · « **Reply #48 on:** June 05, 2011, 09:18:59 am »

Quote from: Andy Velez on June 04, 2011, 10:18:07 pm

Forget about so-called odds. You used a condom. That's exactly what you are supposed to do. Stop indulging in unnecessary fretting. As long as you always use a condom for vaginal/anal intercourse, it doesn't matter whether you are with a pro or a civilian. You will be well protected against the sexual transmission of HIV.

Period.

Man, cut out the drama. Are you really reading what is said back to you? That's right , you had safer sex and were not at risk.

I'm going to warn you right off now that we're not going to do another round with you on this latest experience. You need to be applying what has been said to you for a long time as you continue your life sexually.

We're not here to hold your hand everytime you do something again.

You're going to quickly find yourself getting a Time Out.

v10guy · « **Reply #49 on:** June 05, 2011, 10:03:04 am »

thanks Andy. sorry for frustrating you. I was just wanting to be reassured = no risk and I got that now. Thanks.

Forums Index

Welcome

Welcome to Do I Have HIV?

Author Topic: this a risk? (Read 18652 times)