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Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

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Recent Posts

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 10
1
Living With HIV / Re: "HOPE DIES LAST"
« Last post by Tonny2 on Today at 04:19:26 am »



                ojo.               Thanks Jim, and n my way to my surgery at the Cole Eye Institute in the Cleveland Clinic one hour away from where I live. Surgery starts at  6 am…thanks for the peer support, even an old timer like me needs from others POSITIVE energies…
I would keep you posted for sure… Hugs

@ Leatherman
@ grasshopper
@ Jim Allsn
2
Thank you both for the comments.  I’ve started to monitor at home to confirm if there is truly an issue.  I’ll follow back up after I get a better understanding and then speak with my doctor on the next follow up.
3
Off Topic Forum / Re: Happy St. Patrick's Day
« Last post by Jim Allen on Yesterday at 11:30:37 pm »
Happy St Pats day to you! You get to celebrate it in its native land 😅

 :) Thanks. We didn't want to go anywhere too busy, so we stayed local and enjoyed the day in Trim Co.Meath. Kids loved it despite a bit of rain.
4
Living With HIV / Re: "HOPE DIES LAST"
« Last post by Jim Allen on Yesterday at 11:23:44 pm »
Quote
Finally, I have scheduled my eye surgery. Hopefully my pain will go away for good and I will have a better quality of life getting rid of one pain.… I will keep you posted… Hugs

Hugs and fingers crossed this improves things for you. Keep us posted. 
5
Do I Have HIV? / Re: Possible HIV risk?
« Last post by Jim Allen on Yesterday at 05:36:31 pm »
Quote
I came to this forum for genuine advice

You're welcome.

Quote
And yes I guess this is because I am quite inexperienced by comparison.

Quote
I'm mainly worried as in her own words she has slept with quite a few people over the last few months, and I have no idea how safe she usually acts.

End of the day, to some people you must seem like some sex deviant ... It's really doesn't matter.

Quote
I naively assumed that exposure to more partners would increase your risk of exposure of HIV, as this is what I was taught in school

Well, that makes me even more glad to have reeducated you.

So she could have slept with 1 guy or 1000 guys before you, and not be living with HIV or acquired it on her first experience, as it only takes once. It's HIV, not Windows 95 that required 13 floppy disks to be inserted. Anyhow you could be number 1001 but it doesn't change your HIV risk when sleeping with her, your actions and choices do.

I do wish you well and try to relax and move on with your life.


6
Do I Have HIV? / Re: Possible HIV risk?
« Last post by Mark12345 on Yesterday at 05:22:51 pm »
Thank you Jim. I do understand, and perhaps I naively assumed that exposure to more partners would increase your risk of exposure of HIV, as this is what I was taught in school. I did not add this detail in to in anyway attempt to shame someone else or their behaviour. Again, I meant no offence and nor was I trying to make myself look stupid. I came to this forum for genuine advice. And yes I guess this is because I am quite inexperienced by comparison.

Thank you for your replies.

7
Do I Have HIV? / Re: Possible HIV risk?
« Last post by Jim Allen on Yesterday at 05:12:35 pm »
Anyhow...

I read your post three times with great care.

Quote
The reason I'm worried is I put the condom on shortly after fingering this girl, while my hand was still a little damp with vaginal fluid. I'm worried about these fluids coming into contact with either the cut on my penis or the scabbed over spot during intercourse. Or again when taking off the condom.

Touching your penis after fingering her isn't an HIV risk to you and the condition of your penis is irrelevant.

Quote
she gave me oral and I fingered her before we had sex with a condom.

Let's start with receiving a blowjob, well after 40+ years of this pandemic in terms of BJs, there hasn't been a single documented case of HIV transmission to an insertive partner (the person being "sucked"), and you will not be the worlds first.

The same and a lot more can be said about fingering, not an HIV risk to you!

As for the intercourse itself, HIV can't be transmitted through an intact latex or polyurethane condom, and unless a condom obviously fails during intercourse, there is no reason to be stressing or testing for HIV outside the standard yearly HIV screening.

How many people she might have slept with be it safer sex or not is totally irrelevant and her business.

Move on with your life.

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, every time, no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP in the future as an additional layer of HIV protection

Keep in mind that some sexual practices described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please do get tested regularly and at least yearly for all STI's including but not limited to HIV and test more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and, the only way of knowing is by testing.

Kind regards

Jim

Please Note.
As a member of the "Do I have HIV?" The forum you are required to only post in this one thread no matter how long between visits or the subject matter. You can find this thread by going to your profile and selecting show own post and it will take you here. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Any additional threads will be deleted.
8
Do I Have HIV? / Re: Possible HIV risk?
« Last post by Jim Allen on Yesterday at 05:04:54 pm »
How many people she had sex with is irrelevant. That you posted it means you think it's important, but it is not as it simply doesn't change how HIV is or isn't transmitted. It's also not an indicator of her HIV status...

What matters is your actions and whether those actions were an HIV risk or not.
Understand?



Also, what are quite a few and to compare how many people have you slept with so far?

9
Do I Have HIV? / Re: Possible HIV risk?
« Last post by Mark12345 on Yesterday at 04:54:03 pm »
Hi Jim,

I am a little confused by your responsive. Apologies if those details were either dumb or offensive on my part. I didn't mean them to be either. I am trying to learn more about transmission which is why I wrote this post?



10
Do I Have HIV? / Re: Possible HIV risk?
« Last post by Jim Allen on Yesterday at 04:42:41 pm »
Quote
I'm mainly worried as in her own words she has slept with quite a few people over the last few months

Irrelevant. She could have fucked the entire village without a condom and be HIV negative or only had sex once and be living with HIV. 

Instead, your only concern should be worrying or questioning if your actions were an HIV risk or not, leaning something and that's it.

Quote
I have no idea how safe she usually acts
'

Neither do I and thankfully it's irrelevant.
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