I have heard from several (age 40+) HIV positive, "financially secure", successful professional men (in many fields) that there are limited opportunities to meet for socializing, networking, and dating . So, I am hoping to form a group by having a first get together in midtown Manhattan in the month of September on a weeknight. There is no structure at present, we can figure it out together and if it is of interest , this can happen monthly. This is not going to be a "support group" in nature.
Please feel free to pass this email to your other HIV+ professional friends that in the age 40 and up category that meet the criteria above, and hopefully we will have a good turn out. Contact me with your name, email address, and phone number and I will keep you informed.
My email is : NY40PLUS@aol.com
All best,
Ray
Surely its not intentional
Come on guys give the man a break, you have to admit it's a great way of meeting a few "Sugar Daddies" to help you through life without actually having to work at looking after yourself...why do that when you can get a "financially secure", successful professional men to do it for you.
Aroha
Jan :-*
You're absolutely right, Jan. After all, one has to find something to do once their life as a playboy is over.
No need to engage your unkind remarks. This is a specific group within the poz community wanting to meet like people. This doesn't mean you are any better or less of a person if you don't meet the criteria. Bash me as much as you choose, I suppose if you wanted to form a group of HIV poz Native Americans and I wasn't one, I certainly wouldn't be offended.
No worries, I have received nearly 75 replies of people that want to be in this type of group.
And to the person that made the remark about disaibility, you are way out of line. I have at least 5 guys on disability that are coming that understand what this group is for. The other moronic remarks about the Harvard club, showing income tax returns,
And having so much free time are way out of line. If you don't want to join, then just pass. Stop with the cheap shots, we are all in this together but also branching out into our own sub groups as we choose.
Peace!
No need to engage your unkind remarks. This is a specific group within the poz community wanting to meet like people. This doesn't mean you are any better or less of a person if you don't meet the criteria. Bash me as much as you choose, I suppose if you wanted to form a group of HIV poz Native Americans and I wasn't one, I certainly wouldn't be offended.
No worries, I have received nearly 75 replies of people that want to be in this type of group.
And to the person that made the remark about disaibility, you are way out of line. I have at least 5 guys on disability that are coming that understand what this group is for. The other moronic remarks about the Harvard club, showing income tax returns,
And having so much free time are way out of line. If you don't want to join, then just pass. Stop with the cheap shots, we are all in this together but also branching out into our own sub groups as we choose.
Peace!
What are all of YOU doing in your community to engage poz social groups on an individual basis?
Great initiative.
Even thou I'm not in NY or fit the criteria for the group I have to say I am saddened to see the bitterness among the replies. You cant allow other people their success and let them have this?
I have struggled with drug and alcohol abuse and Im no way near financially secure and will probably never be. Still Im glad to see there are poz people actually thriving in this society.
Wow. Do you genuinely believe the responses are a result of 'bitterness' over other poz people 'thriving in society' ? ::)
I maybe mistaken, but if I correctly recall, I think you stated somewhere that you're from an Asian country but presently living in the US or in Europe. Is that correct? Then, I guess you should have no bitter feelings if certain people decide to exclude you from social groups and settings based on your ethnicity- something you can’t change. Inaccurate analogy perhaps, but the same principle.
Do you have something to say about the topic in this thread or you just want to pick on who I am and where Im from?
Great initiative.
Even thou I'm not in NY or fit the criteria for the group
I'm just curious why you feel that you have something to contribute to the topic of this thread since you are feeling that what Space said wasn't proper. After all, you are not a member of the specific group of people the OP addressed this thread to...Cuz I liked the idea of the group.
Do you have something to say about the topic in this thread or you just want to pick on who I am and where Im from?
Cuz I liked the idea of the group.
How many of the others in this thread do you think "qualify"? Aint seeing anyone questioning their right to post here.
I'd say spacebarsux has made his point well. It is insensitive to use certain criteria like financial success to form a social group of HIVers, that already receives enough stigma as it is. Unless you have been living under a rock, it is well known that many HIVers have financial challenges due to the strain of medical expenses combined with complications due to HIV. That would be true for any chronic disease. That doesn't mean you are not within your rights to form your group. It just means that you are insensitive.We live 2 ppl in a rented 26sqm cubicle without kitchen and hot water. I have no assets but a debt of 50k USD and struggle to finish my degree. I fight alcohol dependency and drug addiction daily. You talk about living under a rock? Well its not far from I can tell ya. If I didnt have my gf I would have ended this tragic farce already. Still I wont take away what the OP wants to accomplish.
I'm amazed at how NYPLUS40 and his supporters interpret the responses from those who disagree with them as being from people who are bitter. I guess that, to you, us dissenters are a bunch of poor folks who are jealous of you and your financial success? That would be condescending, in so many ways.
Rather, our responses just indicate that we what you are doing is terribly insensitive, and wrong. Again, that doesn't mean you can't go forward and do it. But I'm going to speak out when I see actions that I think are insensitive, and divisive to pozzies in a harmful way.
Rather, our responses just indicate that we[/b] what you are doing is terribly insensitive, and wrong. Again, that doesn't mean you can't go forward and do it. But I'm going to speak out when I see actions that I think are insensitive, and divisive to pozzies in a harmful way.
For HIV+ people, I host:
- monthly orgy for HIV+ men who are hung and have toned bodies. Age limit 45 and no Hep C. I felt some responsibility to host a bareback soiree for this group so everyone can just relax and have a good time with their preferred kind of partner. No stress, no rejection. I've posted this on several forums and received many thanks and there's a waiting list of over 30,000 names now. I'm over 45 but as the host of course I am welcome at my own party, which I organise entirely on my own, though the maid comes the next day to clean up. (Not my normal lady, but a cute gay cleaning boy working his way through college.)
- monthly book club for HIV+ women and men. We've found PhDs in comparative literature participate the best, although the club is in principal open to anyone. There are a few B.A.s who come, knowing who the club is really for, so they sit quietly and nobody really minds. Everyone is welcome! (I don't have a PhD in complit but I can talk the talk, and after all, I'm the host.)
- a picnic each summer and a winter holiday trim-a-tree party for the political asylum community with HIV. They are mostly muslim and don't go much in for the ribs at the picnic, yet we receive nothing but embraces and appreciation at these events and its really the least one can do to give back, don't you think.
- Private investors' Suze Orman cocktail hour. This bi-monthly event is open to HIV+ men and women of any age who are fortunate enough to have sufficient assets to be assigned a personal banker at one of the major Swiss private banks. This is a specific group within the poz community wanting to meet like people. This doesn't mean you are any better or less of a person if you don't meet the criteria. We found a good demand for this group in both Geneva and Zurich, and even some members from Basel. We meet at a member's home, drink cocktails, watch Suze Orman and discuss the sad, surprising and often funny little dramas of the working poor. Suze always has a few great zingers! Sure we've got HIV but at least we don't have money problems! Some of us reminisce about when we were poor. And we support each other about dealing with poor members of the family, since that is so complicated. A few people who come don't have personal bankers but they know who the group is for, and I think some of them used to have personal bankers, or aspire to, so everyone gets on fine as long as they play nice. Everyone is welcome!
We are all in this together but also branching out into our own sub groups as we choose.
I encourage everyone to be inspired by NY50PLUS and moimeme and host your own wonderful events for underserved groups in the HIV+ community.
Yours in HIV, bad and good times....
How many of us struggling to get by have lawyers and doctors beating our doors down to date us?
How many of us struggling to get by have lawyers and doctors beating our doors down to date us?
To the OP ,Definitely NOT a place I would want to be a part of, I like people from all walks of life, and don't give 2 shits about there tax return, how much money the make, or anything else for that matter ::)
Oh and good luck that, cuz your gonna need it ???
Hugs
DEN
Financial security can be the person who has a dollar but spends it wisely and is happy..... whereas the person who has a million dollars and spends it frivolously wouldn't be very fiancially secure IMHO...
There are some people who have a million dollars and look and act like they have $10 - and others who have $10, but look, act, and feel like they are millionaires...
Sadly in our community most people want to date younger, better looking, and richer than they are.
Me thinks you need to find a different group of gays to hang out with as you have a warped vission of what "MOST" mature gay men want.
I'm sure your group is looking for older, uglier, broke guys. ::)
and yet he is being defended by a few that fail to see why this is an insensitive poor choice on his part ,
Waaaah, you're too sensitive. Just wait until the revised 40+ HIV rich professional group rules include no fats no fems.
I'm sure your group is looking for older, uglier, broke guys. ::)
Do you have something to say about the topic in this thread or you just want to pick on who I am and where Im from?
Let's look at this from a slightly different perspective. Would you start a social club for people living with other serious diseases, that are only for members who are also financially successful? For example, multiple sclerosis, muscular dystrophy, lupus, Hep C? Do you see any example of such groups?What about a group of people comparing apples and oranges. ::)
What about a group of people comparing apples and oranges. ::)
I think it is so wrong to exclude others based on being "financially secure" I'm sorry but, that means a lot of different things to a lot of different people, what about those of us who are already retired, isn't that a little Vague..... not only that but, it's also like excluding others due to their race ::)
What about a group of people comparing apples and oranges. ::)
Is that anything like a group of old poz queens in a support group gravitating towards all the hot, new, younger attendees?
Only if they are financially successful. :P
Tell me, what's so different that the comparison is invalid, in your opinion?
You can change your financial status and choose to be with whatever class you want to,LOL totally off-topic; but I'd love you to start up another thread and tell us the miracle secret that makes that statement true. :D ;D
I don't understand why people are so upset that a professional HIV person seeks same for a social group.as much as I (and others that have posted here) would like to find an LTS-only group, I don't particularly see the problem either. I have seen all sorts of other social/support groups formed that I wouldn't fit into and I don't have an issue with it. My ASO hosts a black-only male-only MSM-only group that I don't fit into; there's also an addiction-recovery group that I don't fit into; and there's a women-only group I don't fit into. To be honest, I wouldn't fit into a 40+ professional group either. And yet I don't feel excluded from any of those groups, even though technically I am.
Great, help me to re-word it then for this website please.
Funny, on 2 other sites I received nothing but thank you for doing this and trying to fill a void in our community for those over 40 and are fortunate to be doing fine financially and wish to mix with similar people, several even volunteered to help with the arrangements as i organize on my own time and no compensation, haters take note.
My message on your site was the same I posted on others and received nothing but embraces and appreciation. Here I got attacked with poisonous and venomous tyoe remarks which is the exact opposite of the type of people I would want to meet.
What are all of YOU doing in your community to engage poz social groups on an individual basis? I really would like to know, especially since most of you have decided who I am and what my agenda is without even talking to me. That shows limited responsibility to back your remarks.
I am due an apology but I don't see that coming from the hostile readers on this board.
Yours in HIV, bad and good times....
u all should ask questions first before pulling the trigger,
What's up guys! Thanks to everyone who posted in what turned out to be a
spirited discussion, and voiced their opinions in such a civil manner. Way to
go! However, this is going to be the last message regarding the posting that
turned out to be so controversial, and no more will be approved.
Again, I need to step up since I approved the original message. Could I have
asked him to reword the message so as to be more palatable? Indeed. However, I
don't think the end result would have been any different. As has been stated,
SIN is a diverse group, and if this type of group fills a need that is otherwise
not being met, so be it. We all have the choice as to whether to join or not, or
to voice our opinions regarding it.
As for the mission of SIN, perhaps it needs to be revised. It seems to me that
SIN has not solely been an HIV education and awareness support group, but also a
social networking group where poz guys like me have developed and cultivated
friendships that will hopefully last a lifetime. And quite honestly, it's also
been a venue for guys to date and find romance. Hopefully, SIN will continue to
remain a haven of mutual support and respect, despite our disagreements. I for
one, would like for all of this to continue.
Enjoy the rest of your summer guys! I'll post on the board and the calendar the
dates for the UB2's and Board Game Days. Have a good one!
I found this forum just over a year ago soon after my diagnosis. I found it comforting for the first week or so. Then I realized there were so many negative posts/replies all over the forum regardless of the topic. It was mostly how "I am right and you are wrong." kind of things. That scared me and I stopped coming here. A year later I am back here and still see so much negative energy.
Everyone has a different perception. You can voice your opinion but you don't have to be nasty. If it's not your cup of tea, just walk away. Don't shake the table. Someone else might want that cup of tea.
Isn't this forum about supporting each other? Or is it only when I agree with you that I get your support?
Isn't it time we spread more positive energy than negative energy? Such a shame.
I found this forum just over a year ago soon after my diagnosis. I found it comforting for the first week or so. Then I realized there were so many negative posts/replies all over the forum regardless of the topic. It was mostly how "I am right and you are wrong." kind of things. That scared me and I stopped coming here. A year later I am back here and still see so much negative energy.
Everyone has a different perception. You can voice your opinion but you don't have to be nasty. If it's not your cup of tea, just walk away. Don't shake the table. Someone else might want that cup of tea.
Isn't this forum about supporting each other? Or is it only when I agree with you that I get your support?
Isn't it time we spread more positive energy than negative energy? Such a shame.
Isn't it time we spread more positive energy than negative energy? Such a shame.
If it's not your cup of tea, just walk away. Don't shake the table. Someone else might want that cup of tea.
I found this forum just over a year ago soon after my diagnosis. I found it comforting for the first week or so. Then I realized there were so many negative posts/replies all over the forum regardless of the topic. It was mostly how "I am right and you are wrong." kind of things. That scared me and I stopped coming here. A year later I am back here and still see so much negative energy.
Everyone has a different perception. 1) You can voice your opinion but you don't have to be nasty. 2) If it's not your cup of tea, just walk away. Don't shake the table. Someone else might want that cup of tea.
Isn't this forum about supporting each other? Or is it only when I agree with you that I get your support?
Isn't it time we spread more positive energy than negative energy? Such a shame.