Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
October 03, 2022, 02:13:11 pm

Login with username, password and session length


Members
Stats
  • Total Posts: 766178
  • Total Topics: 65357
  • Online Today: 116
  • Online Ever: 5484
  • (June 18, 2021, 11:15:29 pm)
Users Online
Users: 0
Guests: 56
Total: 56

Welcome


Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Do I Have HIV?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Welcome to Do I Have HIV?

Welcome to the "Do I Have HIV?" POZ forum.

This special section of the POZ forum is for individuals who have concerns about whether or not they are HIV positive. Individuals are permitted to post up to three questions or responses in this forum.

Ongoing participation in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum (posting more than three questions or responses) requires a paid subscription, with secure payments made via PayPal.

A seven-day subscription is $9.99, a 30-day subscription is $14.99 and a 90-day subscription is $24.99.

Anyone who needs to post more than three messages in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum -- including past, present and future POZ Forums members -- will need to subscribe, with secure payments made via PayPal.

There is no charge to read threads in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum, nor will there be a charge for participating in any of the other POZ forums. In addition, the POZ Basics "HIV Transmission and Risks" and "HIV Testing" basics, will remain accessible to all.

NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum; attempts to post HIV symptoms or testing questions in any other forums will be considered violations of our rules of membership and subject to time-outs and permanent bans.

To learn how to upgrade your Forums account to participate beyond three posts in the "Do I Have HIV?" Forum, please click here.

Thank you for your understanding and future support of the best online support service for people living with, affected by and at risk for HIV.

Author Topic: Anxiety taking over: Need some perspective  (Read 897 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Gord56

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 3
Anxiety taking over: Need some perspective
« on: July 06, 2022, 05:10:49 pm »
Hi there,

I am already a very health anxious person and have had many HIV scares over the years, these though were in no risk situations I guess they would be called. Protective sex/unprotective oral.

However I recently had protective oral and vaginal sex with a CSW who I do not know the status of. I used my own condom, durex but unsure of still in date. As far as I am aware I used the condom properly, rolled all the way down and securely on, however I did try put it on the wrong way first but quickly realised and turned it round, I had only touched the condom at this point. The protected oral sex was first and then vaginal, vaginal lasting a minute maybe slightly longer. She was on top. I always check condoms after due to my anxiety and as far I could tell there was no split or holes.

Now after 3 days from the episode I got a lump in my armpit which still persists to this day, now almost 2 weeks after the episode.

Firstly my irrational fear caused me to worry it was cancer, went to two doctors they told me it was a boil, but I don't really believe them as then my mind connected lymph node and HIV. I know I wore a condom as well as I could have but I have a large genital wart kind of in my pubic hair about an inch north of my penis base. I have now read that HPV makes you more at risk for HIV infection and I am convinced that some of her vaginal fluids interacted with my wart as she was on top. Part of me thinks this is irrational but I feel the lump in my armpit is from a lymph node from seroconversion.

I am terrified and anxious dUe to having a wife and making a mistake and possibly ruining our life together. Sometimes my brain tells me this is irrational as I have a full 'head' of pubic hard between the wart and her, plus it is an inch north of my penis, plus I do not remember any vaginal fluid in that area. But I am convinced I am wrong and have now acquired HIV.

Any help or perspective would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

Offline Jim Allen

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 19,495
  • Twitter @JimAllenDublin
    • HIV Lessons
Re: Anxiety taking over: Need some perspective
« Reply #1 on: July 06, 2022, 05:26:43 pm »
Hiya,

What you posted about this encounter isn't an HIV concern and the issues you had within three days have nothing to do with HIV from this encounter even if had had a real risk.

Quote
I have now read that HPV makes you more at risk for HIV infection and I am convinced that some of her vaginal fluids interacted with my wart as she was on top.

the theory of an STI "increasing," the odds of HIV transmission, works like this if you have a preexisting STI causing let's say as an example inflammation or open sores and you engage in an activity that is already an HIV risk, such as condomless intercourse it might (slightly) increase the likelihood of HIV being transmitted.

However, it does not create an HIV risk where there was none to start with or magic HIV transmissions. These fluids touching you were not an HIV risk.

The only obvious risk about this would be you passing on HPV.

Quote
dUe to having a wife

Well, ill mention the same thing I do whenever anyone mentioned a relationship.
If you engage in condomless sex with your partner, you are obviously at risk of acquiring HIV. In relationships, condomless sex is often based on trust or past test results; however, this does not prevent HIV. Any condomless sex means accepting the greater risk of acquiring HIV & STIs.

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse correctly and consistently, with no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV

Keep in mind that some sexual practices described as safe in terms of acquiring HIV still pose a risk for other easier acquired STIs. So please do get tested at least yearly for STIs, including but not limited to HIV, and more frequently if condomless intercourse occurs.

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms, and the only way of knowing is by testing.

Kind regards

Jim

Please Note.
As a member of the "Do I have HIV" Forum, you are required to only post in this one thread no matter how long between visits or the subject matter. You can find this thread by going to your profile and selecting show own post, and it will take you here. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread, and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Any additional threads will removed
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

Offline Gord56

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 3
Re: Anxiety taking over: Need some perspective
« Reply #2 on: July 06, 2022, 05:47:01 pm »
Hi Jim,

Thanks for the reply, I really appreciate it and appreciate the work you do here.

I guess the problem I have is that anxiety is mainly driving my fear right now. I understand all you say but then I visualise fluid rubbing into my wart and then can see how I could get HIV, even though it seems that this just isn't reality?

I do understand from most things I have read that symptoms after 3 days is unlikely, however one site did say it was possible. I can't find any info on if just one enlarged node is common for ARS symptoms.

The terrible thing about anxiety is if I didn't have any lump I probably wouldn't be anxious or think about HIV. In actual fact when the lump first came up I convinced myself it was lymphoma and am still a bit scared of that. HIV didn't even cross my mind before some googling that holy shit HPV increases risk of infection. Being a scientist myself I understand about how open sores/warts can increase your risk when having unprotected sex, of course. But anxiety or irrationality allows me to believe a narrative of fluid rubbing into a wart and then the enlarged lymph node and then being positive.

I am trying to look at it like this and some confirmation here would be great, the IF scenario is she has HIV and high viral load, then firstly I would have had to get it through my wart, as condom was used, which like you say could be impossible, secondly symptoms to appear 3 days after is most likely rare. So I am feeding off of two very rare events meaning I have HIV?

Appreciate your patience and thanks for any replies.

Offline Jim Allen

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 19,495
  • Twitter @JimAllenDublin
    • HIV Lessons
Re: Anxiety taking over: Need some perspective
« Reply #3 on: July 06, 2022, 06:00:33 pm »
I've already answered this.

The fluid that came into contact with wasn't an HIV risk, no amount of rubbing is going to change that.  What you think, feel, fear or have read isn't an interest or a fact.

Stop passing on HPV and reduce your HIV risks by using condoms within the relationship or accept the increased risk and test more frequently.
« Last Edit: July 06, 2022, 06:27:15 pm by Jim Allen »
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

Offline Gord56

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 3
Re: Anxiety taking over: Need some perspective
« Reply #4 on: July 06, 2022, 06:31:18 pm »
Thanks Jim

I appreciate your response, even if it doesn't squash my anxiety right now it does help a lot so thank you.

Would you mind answering another question if you know the answer. Is it true that the vaginal fluid which is infectious of HIV is up in the cervix and not necessarily around the vulva/opening/inner lips?

Offline Jim Allen

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 19,495
  • Twitter @JimAllenDublin
    • HIV Lessons
Re: Anxiety taking over: Need some perspective
« Reply #5 on: July 06, 2022, 06:37:20 pm »
Yeah, look, I suspect that nothing I say will fix your anxiety, and I will not even try.

If you keep having fears about HIV, then next to considering taking to a therapist, do continue to use condoms for any intercourse and consider PrEP as an additional layer of HIV prevention as it may also give you peace of mind.

I hope you can cope/manage these fears.

Quote
Is it true that the vaginal fluid which is infectious of HIV is up in the cervix and not necessarily around the vulva/opening/inner lips?

Sure, in short, the vaginal fluids from her Bartholin's glands are a lubricating fluid and do not have any more HIV present than other bodily secretions such as saliva, sweat or tears. Saliva, sweat and tears are not HIV infectious fluids.

The concern would be with the fluids far deeper up the vaginal track, also, the other barrier to your concern would be exposure outside the confines of the human body as it corrodes the receptors HIV uses to infect.
« Last Edit: July 06, 2022, 07:04:39 pm by Jim Allen »
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

 


Terms of Membership for these forums
 

© 2022 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.