Unexpected travel to the Netherlands

[Jim Allen]

So my son is in the Netherlands and has been visiting grandparents with my ex-wife.

Due to fly back yesterday evening, but I got a call from the airport. I can hear my son screaming in the background. Ex is in tears as he refuses to get on the flight, is running off and pulling her hair, hitting her etc.

So tomorrow I am flying to the Netherlands, and I will fly back with him instead.

The thing is, I'm not too worried about getting the flight back with him, but it is the first time one of us has been unable to cope with him, and I am getting more and more concerned about how we are going to manage and care for him when he is older and, at some stage, bigger than us. I have nightmares about him ending up in the care of the state and I wake up from the nightmares sweating and drenching the bed at times 
 
Anyhow, I know everyone has issues in life, many worse than mine but thanks for listening. Just been feeling a bit lost recently.

[virgo313]

Hi Jim, I do not have children & won’t be able to say much. Hope you will think one day at a time. Love will replace “how to manage” when times come. Safe trip Jim.

[Ptrk3]

I'm sorry to hear of your troubles, Jim.  You are a fine father and a very good man.

I wish you the very best.

[Tonny2]

            ojo.          Hi Jim, I’m sorry to read what’s happening with your son. I couple, friends of mine, right now is having that dilema, what to do with James, same problem than your son, but James now is 18 years old, heavy and strong, so strong that his father can not control him anymore. So, I understand you being concerned, my friends still want to keep him with them but, they have thought about your nightmares, taking him to an institution to take care of James…I think that at the end, my friends will do what is best for the three of ten, because it is so difficult for the whole family keep living the way they have been living.

If you want to talk to my friends about how they have been dealing with James through the years, maybe they can share experiences that they might be help you with your son. I think your son is still a small child, isn’t he?…best wishes and good luck when you pick him up in the Netherlands…hugs

[Grasshopper]

Hi Jim, hope you managed to fly back with your son without any troubles at the airport or on the airplane.

Those nightmares....I feel for you, and I can relate. Talked to you GP and asked for something to "put a brake on your mind" so you can at least get a good rest/sleep ?

It's so easy for people to say live in the now and deal with the future when it comes...but that is impossible.

Ik wens je sterkte en wijsheid....hou je sterk...uiteindelijk komt er een oplossing.

Groet

[Jim Allen]

Thanks, everyone, for the messages here and the PMs.

So updates are that my ex is flying back in 30 mins with my daughter, I will fly with my son back on Monday.

My ex and daughter, however, missed the flight early this morning as customs/security would not let her through as they wanted proof in writing that I agreed she could travel with my daughter ... Although it is the rule we have travelled 2-3 times with kids a year for a decade. It's never been an issue before.

As when rains, it pours; my son pulled out a tooth this morning, not the whole thing so working on getting an emergency dentist appointment.

[Jim Allen]

Right, well bags are packed, have kept things nice and calm for the last few days and tomorrow ill try to fly home with him.

Presuming it will be alright, if not it's going to a long drive down to France and a ferry across to Ireland later this week.

[Tonny2]

            ojo.           Hay Jim, good luck, hopefully you won’t have to drive…hugs

[leatherman]

best wishes! for whichever trip you take.....but hopefully the faster of the two.

[Jim Allen]

Thanks all 

Made it back, a long story that I will post later but we're home.