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How do you feel about the person who infected you?Do you forgive them?

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My husband have it to me.  He's bisexuals but I did not know that when we married.   We found out when he went to jail for something he had done before we met. He told me over the phone from jail.   I hung up.  I had no words.   First i was furious.   But he didn't know either that he was positive.   I have forgiven him and we are still together.   I have more trouble forgiving him for for not telling me he was bi.  He has picked fights and left so he could sleep with men for the past 2 years.   He's told me Iwell have to be ok with him doing this or he will leave.   That in itself Iwill never forgive him for.   He should have been honest with me and himself before we married. ..8 years ago.

there's a mixture of love with anger and sadness.  He died over 6 years ago.  I miss him.  Wish he hadn't left so soon.  I hate dating. Actually I'm giving up on it.   I feel like this ordeal has made me lose my innocent perspective that people are good (men specifically) .. well the ones I met are good but so messed up emotionally. 

No.  I do not forgive him.  I married a man and we were trying to start a family.. yes.. get pregnant.  Thankfully I did not get pregnant but I did get HIV.  and then found out he knew over a year before he met me.  He is dead now and I'm not angry at him.  I dont forgive it though.  He never asked for it anyway. 

My first husband gave it to me around 1987.  I didn't know he was positive, though, until he passed in 1989.  But he didn't know either. He was a horrible alcoholic that never, ever went to the doctor.  I was angry at him for dying, not for passing the virus.

So, I forgave him a long time ago as far as the virus is concerned. And eventually I forgave him for dying.  When I forgive people it's more for myself.  I hate hanging onto resentments, they can fuck people up.  So, I believe forgiveness and letting go are keys for me to keep my emotional health in check.


I hate him with every fibre of my being! I cant even stand the thought of him. Im so angry at him Im not his first victim apparently he goes around infecting young woman with this virus. I saw from his instagram account he already has a new victim. I just want him to stop. Im also so med at these public clinics for using rapid tests. He took ARV which reduces the viral load and the level of antibodies in his blood. I was very open about the topic we heard the HIV/AIDS discussion told him I broke up with my bf of 5years coz I felt like he was cheating and putting me at risk I chose my health over love. He pretended that he also feels the same we went and got tested several times with the rapid test since hes taking ARVs he would test negative also. Somewhere around September he stopped taking his meds just so he infects me. End of September broke up with me. I started having acute infection symptoms I went to the Dr dats when I heard that shocking news thats people who take ARV tend to test negative.  Everything made sense it explained why he forced unprotected sex he would rape me in certain instances(spousal rape) just so we don't use protection. He was jealous I was young early twenties things going well in varsity I had dreams which included joining the military. It was like talking about cheese with a rat. I refuse to blame my self I had pure intentions I was inlove I went testing with him several times he had hidden agendas. I hate him and I doubt I will ever forgive him I dont have to even. Im planning on taking legal actions against him. He has to stop! I will make him stop even if it means doing it my self.
1st positive ELISA test TODAY as in 18 Jan 2016


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