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I am in such a dark place

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Hi, (I am a 29 year old guy)

Last week (Thursday) I was in a very dark place. My girlfriend is abroad and we were planning to split up while she was abroad, but to hopefully get back together. On Thursday I was lonely and thought to visit a prostitute (Female) (I live in Amsterdam). During sex the condom broke.

At the time we noticed and stopped, I asked about STDs but assured me everything was okay. Fast forward to starting 3 days ago I have had every symptom of Acute HIV infection there is. Insomnia, chills, not eating, chapped lips....

I have an RNA test this Monday. I am in such a dark place I do not know what to do. I do not have anyone to tell this to. My girlfriend whom I wanted to spend my life with...Why would she ever stay with me now? I don't have anyone close and I am really scared right now.

I don't know what to do and I am terrrified about a positive result. How can I tell my girlfriend what happened, she is the only one close in my life right now.

How will I survive this? Is it worth trying?

Jim Allen:

Sorry to hear about your pain. Don't get ahead of yourself though.

Understand that the risk was a broken condom during intercourse, thankfully a low HIV situation given the condom provided protection until it broke and you are the insertive partner.

Test at six weeks post exposure with a blood-drawn lab HIV antibodies test and a non-reactive result at that time would rarely ever change. Generally, retesting isn't needed, but you can at three months if you wish.

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse correctly and consistently, every time, with no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about taking PrEP as an additional layer of HIV protection

Keep in mind that some sexual practices described as 'safe' in terms of HIV might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please get tested at least yearly for STI's, including but not limited to HIV. Test more frequently if any condomless intercourse occurs.

Note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and, the only way of knowing is by testing.

Kind regards


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Jim Allen:

--- Quote ---How will I survive this? Is it worth trying?
--- End quote ---

HIV isn't a death sentence and extremely easy to manage.

Is it worth it ... Sure at least I think so, I've had two kids, a career and travelled the world, HIV never was a barrier to my life.

How will I ever be able to explain this? I am seeking alcohol therapy as this truly is my bottom. But how can I explain what happened and if I have HIV?

Jim Allen:

--- Quote from: Trying2bbetter on January 27, 2022, 06:49:45 am ---How will I ever be able to explain this? I am seeking alcohol therapy as this truly is my bottom. But how can I explain what happened and if I have HIV?

--- End quote ---

You are getting way ahead of the situation with "what ifs" and stressing over an issue you don't have.

See right now there is nothing to explain and overwhelming odds are you don't have HIV from this encounter. If you did explaining it is easy with the truth.

Test and good luck with the alcohol therapy


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