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Off Topic Forums => Off Topic Forum => Topic started by: PDXRon31 on July 02, 2006, 12:11:56 pm

Title: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: PDXRon31 on July 02, 2006, 12:11:56 pm

I am a West Coast guy...born in Oregon. I am 31 and have lived in Seattle, Los Angeles, Portland, and at one point, Dallas, Texas. I have been positive for a tad over 6 years, but last year I developed the dreaded PML and was forced to sell my home in Portland and move in with mom. I am still not quite well enough to venture back out on my own physically and of course financially. I am grateful to receive SSD, but shit, talk about keeping the poor poor. Anyway, my two sisters, their families and subsequent grand kids have had their circumstances pull them to Little Rock, Arkansas. My mom, in true form, is desperate to be a grandma full time and therefore plans to sell this house and move there next year. I had secretly hoped to be well enough by then to have moved back out on my own or at least be caring for the estate of a generous, old, Sugah Daddy. :) At any rate, some friends came by yesterday to look at our house and loved it. They sold theirs and escrow closes at the end of July. My mom is willing to sell to them and so if they bite, it will catapult my ass into the South of the USA during the heat of the summer. I am disheartened about this new development. I am nervous about leaving my friends, my network of doctors and health care workers that literally saved my ass from dying last year, and of course my gorgeous Pacific Northwest surroundings and temperate climate. Anyone have some educated words of encouragement should I find myself living in *gulp* Arkansas???

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: RAB on July 02, 2006, 12:17:56 pm

Ron:


Don't really have any advice regarding living in the South, but I expect once you get there and get adjusted, everything will work out fine.

RAB

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: bear60 on July 02, 2006, 12:24:40 pm

See...I consider Arkansas ....midwest and sorta not SOUTH.  South the old south anyway is north and south carolina ....virginia.....georgia...missssisippi.... louisanna ...alabama ....anywhere that Bette Davis wore a big dress and said "Ya'll"

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: Teresa on July 02, 2006, 12:47:11 pm

I agree with bear on what states are considered the south...but here in kansas and in arkansas(have some relatives there) we say ya'll.

I think Arkansas is a pretty state..has lots of hills. Some call them mountains but they are just big hills compared to the mountains ive been to in montana. But im from Kansas so I like anything that isnt flat.

Hope it wont be too bad for ya if you find yourself living there.

Hugs
Teresa

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: Dachshund on July 02, 2006, 12:56:43 pm

If you were sad when you lived in big "D" just wait till you live in little " L ". Having family there might help with the transition, but you are in for a little culture shock. I grew up in the northwest so I can understand your trepidation. Ah, summer in the south...what a treat.

Contrary to what Bear 60 says Arkansas and Tennessee are definitely part of the old south. Southern as you can get....Florida, now that's another story.

Check out the Clinton Library...why I hears that thing got air con-dish-on-ing.

Hal 8)

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: PDXRon31 on July 02, 2006, 01:07:22 pm

Hal, you made me laugh....and here that's how I thought you actually spelt air conditioning! Lawd, I's just feels so ignunt. We just got a call from the couple, they want the house and are sending an inspector out this week. Guess I'll start packing.  :'(

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: The Canuck on July 02, 2006, 01:14:37 pm

PDXRon31,

Quote

Guess I'll start packing.

Perhaps you can sing '' Glory...Glory..Halleluah...Glory..Glory Halleluah...'' while packing ? Somehow it should put you in a Southern mood...? :-X

Best of luck,

The Canuck

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: Dachshund on July 02, 2006, 01:33:17 pm

Quote from: The Canuck on July 02, 2006, 01:14:37 pm

PDXRon31,

Perhaps you can sing '' Glory...Glory..Halleluah...Glory..Glory Halleluah...'' while packing ? Somehow it should put you in a Southern mood...? :-X

Best of luck,

The Canuck

I would not suggest singing "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" if you are planning to stay in the South. You might want to brush up on "Dixie".

Hal :o

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: The Canuck on July 02, 2006, 01:35:56 pm

Sorry...I'm fromm the Great White North... so forgive me for the mixed up...then it has to be something like...'' Oh I wish I was in Dixie..away..away...and Dixieland...'' ( sorry that's all I know ).... :-X

The Canuck
(Who's not Southern one bit)

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: Dachshund on July 02, 2006, 01:45:34 pm

            OOOOOHHHHHH CANADA,

      That's okay, we love you anyway!

                         Hal :-*

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: The Canuck on July 02, 2006, 01:48:38 pm

Well Hal..it was a good damn try for a Canuck.. :P

Regards,

The Canuck

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: bear60 on July 02, 2006, 01:58:45 pm

I know I know....the SOUTH included Arkansas and Tennessee, Hal.
But I was taking the point of view that the OLD South is the real south...Arkansa and Tenn were merely "hillbilly" states of no real wealth...while the OLD south had a LONG history of plantations and money and well...you saw "Gone With the Wind" ....they imported their china from England........George Washington and Thomas Jefferson and Monticello ...lol
having grown up in North Carolina...I got a sense that the OLD south looked down its nose at those NEW South states and didnt really have any respect for them.  I mean even North Carolina wasnt considered really a good OLD south state because it never had the wealth that Virginia,  Georgia and Mississippi and Louisanna had. Too many independent small farmers, dont you know.
But..I agree Florida wasnt a southern state ...it went from obscure alligator swamps to a suburb of Brooklyn...lol.

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: PDXRon31 on July 02, 2006, 02:37:55 pm

I guess coming from the NW, I consider anyplace where the locals speak with a twang as the "South".  ;D

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: BB on July 02, 2006, 04:24:35 pm

Arkansas is a wonderfull state and much like where you currently live, is full of trees and I think a much larger variety of trees. Another plus is that you can start going around bare foot and wearing cut offs. And you can start huntin possum, coon an wabbit all which is goood makins foo fine stuu.

Gawd help you! ;D

BB

P.S. Make sure your mom buys a home on top of a hill, cause I hear the water gets kind of deep during the rainy season which is most of the year. Can you swim?

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: GSOgymrat on July 02, 2006, 04:37:08 pm

Quote from: bear60 on July 02, 2006, 01:58:45 pm

But..I agree Florida wasnt a southern state ...it went from obscure alligator swamps to a suburb of Brooklyn...lol.

I agree. I think Miami now technically belongs to South America. My partner can't stand Miami because it is too much like Cuba, and he should know because he's from there.

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: Basquo on July 02, 2006, 04:47:05 pm

Here in the wilderness of Texas, many consider Arkansas a vacation destination.  I know I went there as a kid.  I remember hills that seemed to be mountains, a cavern and lots of rainbow trout.  And hunky hillbillies (insert "Dueling Banjoes" song here.) ;D

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: PDXRon31 on July 02, 2006, 04:55:03 pm

Thank you Basquo and BB for the encouraging sentiments...I'll try and keep an open mind.  ::)

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: Dachshund on July 02, 2006, 05:31:59 pm

.....and remember, two dates with your cousin is considered engaged.

Come and listen to my story 'bout a man named Jed :P

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: poznoregon on July 02, 2006, 08:16:33 pm

PDX Ron, I think that would be a tough move, I'm originally from Texas and currently looking to relocate. One of the places I have been thinking about has been back to Texas but I feel so attached to the NW for some reason that I think I am going to limit my job hunt to the Portland and Seattle areas. The south is a great part of the country but after living on the west coast where it is so liberal it is hard to give up. I guess I really don't have any good advise for you except I can understand your delima.

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: Cliff on July 02, 2006, 09:43:12 pm

It will be different, but hopefully your family will be able to help you make the best of it.  Try not focus on the negatives too much, cause that may cloud your experience (self-fulling prophecy).  Will there be challenges (conservative culture, weather, smaller gay population, fewer HIV resources, etc..)?  Yes.  But at least you know that going into it and can try to work around it to make the best of it.  Find out what local HIV resources are there.

http://www.deltaaetc.org/arkresources.html (http://www.deltaaetc.org/arkresources.html)

Find out what gay organizations are available:

Arkansas Gay & Lesbian Task Force
Little Rock, AR
(800) 448-8305

The key is to get there and meet new people.  Meeting new people can help to make the transition easier.  Family is great but you'll need some time away from them every now and then.

Good luck!

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: PDXRon31 on July 03, 2006, 11:18:01 am

WOW! Thanks Cliff, I looked at the website, that is great. Thank you.  :D

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: bear60 on July 03, 2006, 11:39:48 am

A number of years ago...two friends of mine went on a search for a great place to live...they went all over the USA and guess where they settled...Arkansas.  Its close to a town I think...Hot Springs or Warm Springs...anyway a (growing)  gay and lesbian population....theater groups ....the works.  At the time land was cheap too.

Oh and Basquo....I havent seen " Deliverance" in years...maybe I shoulld see it again!!

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: BB on July 03, 2006, 12:22:25 pm

Isn't Ar-Kansas in the bible belt? So if Ron can learn to understand and speak Ar-Kansasin and walk around carrin a bible and wearn his "Praise JC"  button, well he should be just fine, cute boy an all.

BB

No offence to anyone intended!!!

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: jack on July 03, 2006, 12:30:03 pm

You are moving from one of the most beautiful and funky cities in the US to one of the most miserable and poverty stricken areas in the world. Good Luck, you are gonna need it. There are great places to live in the South,  Arkansas isnt on the list.

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: Robert on July 03, 2006, 12:37:43 pm

CLiff gave some good advice.  Meeting new people is the most important.

My partner Michael wants to move to Arkansas.  His best friends live there.  For some reason they all moved there when they finished college some 20+ years ago and they love it.The few times he's been there, he's had a great time.  Me?  I just want to stay put.

good luck.

robert

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: cmhjeff on July 06, 2006, 04:46:45 pm

Good luck Ron I hope it all works out!   Jeffrey is always beeing offered jobs all over the USA and lucky for me he understands why I don't want to start all over again when I have great doctors here in Ohio.  Home has always been Ohio so I can't offer any advice for you when it comes to Arkansas.

Jeff

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: david25luvit on July 07, 2006, 07:32:21 am

Hey Ron....having lived in the deep south for most of my life I can assure you we are not all toothless and without our charms.  Of course the Mississippi Gulf coast is quite different from the rest of the state and the south.  I drove thru Arkansas a couple of times so I know very little about the place.  But the south as a whole is not the terrible place some would have you believe

Good luck good buddy...  I wish you well!

Title: Re: Moving to the South??? :( HELP!
Post by: Lwood on July 07, 2006, 08:41:39 am

I went to Arkansas once, to visit a friend that was in prison in Texarkana. Texarkana is a 'Dry' county, another wonderfull southern tradition ...( they dont sell Alcohol)   I had to drive 30 miles into Arkansas in order to find someplace that sold beer.. because after a drive across Texas and in order to enter a penetentiary, I felt the THIRST.
Being the smartass that I am, I wore a Gay Pride T shirt for my visit. My friend was amused.
Arkansas didnt make much of an impression either way, although after a 60 mile beer run, I really wasn't in the best of moods.....