POZ Community Forums
Main Forums => Positive Women => Topic started by: kitty1 on August 28, 2011, 02:21:15 pm
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Hi ladies, long time. I am crying as I type this. I hate where I live. I moved from a bigger city to a very small town when I married my husband. I tried by all means to like the place but it has not worked. People are different. In four years I have not made a single friend and worse with my illness. I always have the feeling as though eventually we will move somewhere but my husband is rooted here. He was born here and all his family is here and this is all he knows.
I wake up and sit on the couch all day browsing the internet. The city is a ghost town withnothing to do or exciting. I feel as though I am 70 yrs old at 34. I can shake the depression feeling. I am crying like a kid. The only person I talk to, she also cant stand the place and travels out of town to where she came from and is out of town right now. My husband cant understand. What should I do?
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Kitty, why don't you take a trip out of town? It sounds like it works for your friend, and it may be a refreshing change for you.
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a weekend away, only a stop gap measure but maybe it will give you time to think, put things in perspective... hopefully you'll see you path more clearly?
edited to add... doh, positive women! i'll go now
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Zach.... hehehe... thanks for noticing you were in the women's room, saves me telling you off. Next time, have a look at the sign on the door before coming in. ;) :)
Kitty, have you thought about getting a job that would get you out of the house and enable you to meet new people? Even just something part-time if you're not up to working full-time. You might also look into volunteering at the local hospital, or even old folk's home or animal shelter. Are there any evening classes like for yoga, painting, pottery, cooking? Anything to get you out of the house and meeting people.
I live in a small town myself, one I did not grow up in. It was daunting at first to meet people and "break into" the social circles that exist in your town (I know how small towners can be suspicious of newcomers). I've been here twenty years now and couldn't imagine living anywhere else.
Occasional trips out of town won't hurt either.
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Thanks ladies, will look into all what you said.
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I agree with what everyone's written thus far. An added vote for volunteerism as it pulls you out of your head a bit more. You feel trapped, how does a geriatric patient with no means of mobility feel? Volunteering with seniors brings with it a sense of being able to bring comfort and sometimes, joy.
It's hard to imagine when you're in such a down mindset that there are many people who would "kill" for your lifestyle, your home, your fresh water, your weekly bounty on the table. If you have to, pull that one out of the bag to coax you to a fresh perspective on being fortunate.