HIV Prevention and Testing > Do I Have HIV?

Oral sex with nearly 30 guys



Recently I have discovered the excitement of gay cruising. In the last 6 months I gave head to nearly 30 men. Non of them came into my mouth. I didn't have anal sex neither.
Three weeks ago my gums started bleeding, I had soar throat and a swollen lymph node on the left side of my neck. No fever.
During all this time, I am in a monogamuos relationship (was cheating with random guys in cruising areas as I said) .  Two weeks ago I had anal sex with my partner (I was bottom). A few days ago he has got sore throat (he caughs a lot), swollen lymph nodes on the neck and periodic fever.
Is it possible that I had been infected with HIV through oral sex during cruising and then passed the infection to my partner?
It's hard for me to take the test without him knowing I cheated! And I would hate myself for passing him HIV. Freaking out

Jim Allen:

--- Quote ---Two weeks ago I had anal sex with my partner
--- End quote ---

Condomless and without PrEP?

Jim Allen:
So I hope you feel better soon, and you should see your healthcare provider and treat whatever is making you feel unwell. 

Read your post. Let's start with the blowjobs, well, the mouth generally lacks a route for HIV to infect, and saliva also neutralises HIV by damaging the receptors needed to infect human cells. Giving a blowjob is such a minute HIV risk that it doesn't warrant specific testing outside the standard yearly HIV screening. Of course, there are other infections you can easily acquire this way.

Regarding intercourse, if condomless, it is an HIV risk to you that warrants testing. Test to confirm your HIV status six weeks after your last possible exposure with a blood-drawn (lab) HIV antibody test. A non-reactive result at that time would rarely ever change. Retesting at three months is generally not needed.

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse correctly and consistently, with no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV

Keep in mind that some sexual practices described as safe in terms of acquiring HIV still pose a risk for other easier acquired STIs. So please do get tested at least yearly for STIs, including but not limited to HIV, and more frequently if condomless intercourse occurs.

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms; the only way to know is by testing.

Kind regards


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