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Author Topic: blah  (Read 23284 times)

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Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #50 on: January 21, 2007, 01:45:06 pm »
lol this thread has gone a bit of a tangent :-P...i like that thats usually how my mind works anyways hehehe

usually goes from one topic to the next without finishing the first....then on to sex...

i have that on the brain now...flashbacks of last night lol :-\
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline twofires

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Re: blah
« Reply #51 on: January 21, 2007, 01:45:36 pm »
i think one of the binding ties is a person's proclivity to push the envelope
Who was it wrote; Give any one species too much rope and they'll fuck it up?
-Roger Waters

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #52 on: January 21, 2007, 01:46:06 pm »
i grew up around a bunch of crazy people...so nothing unsettles me now hehehe
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blah
« Reply #53 on: January 21, 2007, 01:46:52 pm »
maybe you'd think about sex less if you weren't naked in your avatar
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline twofires

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Re: blah
« Reply #54 on: January 21, 2007, 01:47:12 pm »
>i have that on the brain now

toys: a boy's best friend
Who was it wrote; Give any one species too much rope and they'll fuck it up?
-Roger Waters

Offline twofires

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Re: blah
« Reply #55 on: January 21, 2007, 01:48:17 pm »
>nothing unsettles me now

i thought that too, until last week
Who was it wrote; Give any one species too much rope and they'll fuck it up?
-Roger Waters

Offline ademas

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Re: blah
« Reply #56 on: January 21, 2007, 01:51:27 pm »
maybe you'd think about sex less if you weren't naked in your avatar

maybe I'd think about sex less if he weren't naked in his avatar.

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #57 on: January 21, 2007, 01:51:33 pm »
im naked in my avatar because im a hornball....

what can i say :-\ ....i try to abstain but it never works lol

actually i can go a while without needing it but once i get started i cant stop...a true addictive personality :-(....but i guess i wont get any until i get over the "how long to wait before calling again" complex hehee

even when i like someone i never like them to know that hehe
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #58 on: January 21, 2007, 01:52:16 pm »
:-D

what happened last week that unsettled you?
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline twofires

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Re: blah
« Reply #59 on: January 21, 2007, 01:58:09 pm »
pent up frustrations

blew $1000 on christmas with the family (thats extremely extravangent for me) and then my transmission blew, another $1600 for that

I started asking for zoloft at my clinic last mid-december, they kept saying I couldn;t get in to see my doc until Feb 20

nice, huh?

they suggest I try Crisis Hotline to get a appt with the local mental health dept for the zoloft script

then it went into a roller coaster of doom, capped by them losing my drivers license, visa cards, cellphone, keys etc cuz they sent them off with another inmate of the mental health hospital they dumped me into after I got pissed for sitting for 4 hours at the mental health clinic

its been quite a couple weeks really, and all I wanted was some zoloft (you might hear me repeating that phrase often, its when I get my little soap box out)
Who was it wrote; Give any one species too much rope and they'll fuck it up?
-Roger Waters

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #60 on: January 21, 2007, 02:02:17 pm »
lol well i hope these next weeks get better :-D....i go on wild spending sprees myself ...i decided not to spend any money this christmas and be a grinch (i need to get my evil credit cards paid off)

im lucky...i always make friends with doctors wherever i live lol...so i just call them and ask for little prescriptions like that....too bad they wont write me prescriptions for deca or anything like that...guess im stuck building muscle the natural way for now (which sucks)...i asked my hiv doc about steroids just as a general question he said "dont even think about it...i dont believe in that stuff".....didnt like that answer ...i would have preffered "i dont believe in that becasue __________" no explanation
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #61 on: January 21, 2007, 02:07:07 pm »
next time you get your zoloft script ask for 30 refills lol
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline Miss Philicia

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  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Re: blah
« Reply #62 on: January 21, 2007, 02:10:22 pm »
too bad you're not up here... I have two bottles of wellbutrin sitting around and copious some samples of cymbalta
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blah
« Reply #63 on: January 21, 2007, 02:11:16 pm »
I also have some androgel for the rican
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blah
« Reply #64 on: January 21, 2007, 02:11:48 pm »
(I hoard things, like my grandmother)
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blah
« Reply #65 on: January 21, 2007, 02:12:03 pm »
omgmultiplepostings++++
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #66 on: January 21, 2007, 02:13:41 pm »
i never have anything left...well i have ambiens/xanax a rarely use hahaha....

wellbutrin is no problem getting a prescription...now androgel is lol...

Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline twofires

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    • Artists Farm
Re: blah
« Reply #67 on: January 21, 2007, 02:15:51 pm »
isn't androgel for....???  ;)
Who was it wrote; Give any one species too much rope and they'll fuck it up?
-Roger Waters

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #68 on: January 21, 2007, 02:18:03 pm »
lol...kind of a steroid :-P...not as good as deca or winstrol but whatever...algo es algo ;-)

i kill myself working out, i eat ....i never get any better lol its frustrating
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blah
« Reply #69 on: January 21, 2007, 02:31:26 pm »
I'm sure you could find steroids in a gym.  You're obviously not a very crafty queen. (yet)
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #70 on: January 21, 2007, 02:34:40 pm »
lol yea i could find them but i dont know if theyd be legit....i have a "thing" about paying for crap that doesnt work....or not knowing what im putting in my body....

but yea your right im not that crafty with that yet...i used to be crafty with all the other drugs though  :-\

anyways when i go to the gym im all serious and dont know anyone...i need to start talking to the muscle boys lol,,,,,everytime ive had people buying them they tell me afterwards and always say "i havent heard the the guy in a while" lol

i probably havent been to pushy about it because im broke lol....medical visits get expensive lol...and i want to pay everything off...then ill go looking hehe
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline thunter34

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  • His name is Carl.
Re: blah
« Reply #71 on: January 21, 2007, 02:35:45 pm »
lol...kind of a steroid :-P...not as good as deca or winstrol but whatever...algo es algo ;-)

i kill myself working out, i eat ....i never get any better lol its frustrating


poor dear. his body is so clearly a mess.    ::)

AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #72 on: January 21, 2007, 02:48:54 pm »
LOL yea a big mess :-) :-*
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline thunter34

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  • His name is Carl.
Re: blah
« Reply #73 on: January 21, 2007, 02:50:45 pm »
long time no talk!  hello, sweetness.  since we have been discussing the avatar a bit, is that a touch of facial fuzz on there or just shadowing?


during the holidays, my own body seemed to be falling apart so fast that i needed a hard hat.  starting to recover now.  my meds also tend to make my waist fluctuate up and down rather quickly at times.


speaking of...about to go munch some lunch really fast.
« Last Edit: January 21, 2007, 02:54:51 pm by thunter34 »
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #74 on: January 21, 2007, 02:54:54 pm »
its facial fuzz....i was going for a butch look that day :-O lol

actually i was just lazy that day and didnt feel like shaving

how have you been?
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline thunter34

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  • Posts: 7,374
  • His name is Carl.
Re: blah
« Reply #75 on: January 21, 2007, 02:57:44 pm »
ok.  enjoyed holidays more than usual.  gained more wieght than i should have.  working to get it back off now.  should exercise more, but right now i am mostly adjusting diet.  i ate soooo much candy and crap over about the last two months it was crazy. 


have to hop off shortly, but will be back on very soon.


"blah" is right.  nothing but rain and cold slop here today!
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #76 on: January 21, 2007, 03:00:33 pm »
lol...well hopefully tomorrow will be less of a blah day :-D

yea taking off holday weight is a bitch....my problem is SWEETS...i work in a restaurant that speciializes in desserts....i have temptation all day/night long.....i need to find an internship or another job by next trimester so i guess i wont have to put up with that much longer
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline Miss Philicia

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  • celebrity poster, faker & poser
Re: blah
« Reply #77 on: January 21, 2007, 03:02:35 pm »
uh oh... thunterwhore34's moving in for the kill

deboned puerto rican chicken meat on a split
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #78 on: January 21, 2007, 03:16:38 pm »
lol....wow i didnt know i could still be considered chicken after 20 :-O lol...who wouldve thought.....,my ex dumped me for a 17 year old i thoughs i was past my prime hahaha
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blah
« Reply #79 on: January 21, 2007, 03:29:32 pm »
Anything lacking body hair looks like a plucked chicken
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #80 on: January 21, 2007, 03:31:38 pm »
lol....i have body hair sometimes...depends on the day of the week and my mood....

anyways im off for now...time to go to work until 2am :'( ....i hate my job lol....
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline twofires

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Re: blah
« Reply #81 on: January 21, 2007, 03:42:06 pm »
>i kill myself working out, i eat ....i never get any better

always remember: beer has food value but food does not have beer value
Who was it wrote; Give any one species too much rope and they'll fuck it up?
-Roger Waters

Offline poet

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  • Poet living and working in Central Maine
Re: blah
« Reply #82 on: January 21, 2007, 04:34:12 pm »
Well, having started the thread, what did you mean by: 'I have tried meeting people on poz.com but i guess there are a total of 13-15 people on there most of which are not my type.  Too old?  Too ____?'  (Asking in part because we have a handful of guys here on the Cape only.  It's not a question of 'type here, but of body count. :)

Then you said: 'I try dating people where i dont know their status but i guess im still so insecure of the situation that once i do come clean i dont know where to go from there (i get scared of making any more moves and cant read whether they just want to be friends or keep going further)'  We had a thread going recently in which guys were saying that while they don't lie, they often will not disclose (come clean) initially, waiting to see if there is anything there before making things complicated.  If you are willing to have safe sex only and take a chance, this might be a way of approaching guys.  Seeing if they are your type before you tell them.  And the 'reading' problem is true whether you are in NYC or Puerto Rico, trust me.  Communication is complicated for most people, seemingly.  Or they feel like deer in the headlights and freeze.

Then you said: 'its like learning how to date all over again).......' which is too true.  Or thought about another way, it's like having to rethink HOW to date.  Before sero-converting, before hiv/aids, it was have sex with anyone anytime you felt like it.  Now it's to disclose or to not disclose?  To have sex, but how to have sex?  Win

Winthrop Smith has published three collections of poetry: Ghetto: From The First Five; The Weigh-In: Collected Poems; Skin Check: New York Poems.  The last was published in December 2006.  He has a work-in-progress underway titled Starting Positions.

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blah
« Reply #83 on: January 21, 2007, 04:40:40 pm »
I'm sure a lot of it is his age.  How many HIV+ people did you encounter dating (assuming one stays in one's age group) at the age of 24.  I was diagnosed in my 20's and I will offer that it's different than being diagnosed in your 30's or 40's. 
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline thunter34

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Re: blah
« Reply #84 on: January 21, 2007, 06:03:26 pm »
uh oh... thunterwhore34's moving in for the kill

deboned puerto rican chicken meat on a split

philly, i'm sure i don't know what you're talking about!


(but if i did have a craving for puerto rican meat, i'm sure i would prefer it served with the bone in.)
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #85 on: January 22, 2007, 11:10:51 am »
well i dont know the disclosure issue i actually prefer to get it out of the way before even thinking about sex or before i start to like them.....its easier to get rejected by someone you dont like, dont care about, and just dont care what they think :-D.....the other way would just kill my self esteem :-D

Only problem with that method is the fact puerto rico is an island so news travels faster than most places lol so i guess i have to be careful with that also....but i could also just go for the fuck-it approach and not really care who knows (i mean here in the island 2 people know and then everyone knows in a few months hehe)
I dont know whats worst, being open and saying your positive and not hide it, or having people talk about it all the time and you denying it :-P

Actually most of the guys ive met on poz.com are in their 30's-40's and nobody my own age (which is fine with me because i dont like younger guys usually....early to late 30's is ideal for me)...but their is still such a low quantity that i havent found any my type....in fact i was about to hit one over the head when i first found out and he said "i know what your going through i just want to be your friend", i said "ok", then of course he tried to take my situation and use it to get in my pants (which didnt work)....but yea...no luck hehehe


After saturdays night date im going through the "to call or wait for him to call me" bit lol....i never know what to do in that respect :-O GRRRRR.....
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: blah
« Reply #86 on: January 22, 2007, 11:40:32 am »
Well, he could be going through the "do I call or not" thing too so maybe you should just call him.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: blah
« Reply #87 on: January 22, 2007, 08:34:12 pm »
well i talked to him online...dont know if that counts lol....but i was busy today anyways and im sure he was also...i dont like bugging people tooooooo much during the week....lord knows i never have time for much anyways either :-D....but i guess ill call tomorrow or something

priorities:
1.School
2.Work
3.GYM
4.Friends
5.SEX/LOVE LIFE (this can get bumped up the list if i find someone worth it...especially since sex is good cardio lol)
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

 


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