Introducing myself

[Giitus]

Hi,

I am new here. I am HIV- but my partner of 10 years is positive. He got it 4 years ago from unprotected sex. I love him and forgave him for cheating on me. Now I  care for him more then he does for himself. I am worried about the future and it is constant struggle as he does not care at times to take his meds.  He is on genvoya and is suppressed. His cell count stays below 250 but no health issues so far. 

Thank you all for letting me join this forum.

[Ptrk3]

I'm glad you found this forum for support and enlightenment.  Welcome.

Feel free to encourage your partner to also join and seek the support and encouragement he needs to remain adherent to the medical regimen that keeps him alive, healthy, and a vital part of your life.

[Giitus]

Hi Ptrk3. I hope he will join.  When he is not depressed he takes his meds and shows interest in living. Other times I have to police him to take the pill in front of me. Lately I kept him preoccupied and now his back in the gym. His work environment improved. His stress level got down. He seems to be enjoying life again. I hope it will last. I am tired of reminding him in graphical detail   about what it probably means to be permanently dead and not having all the gadget toys around and travel to his dream destinations. It works.

[CaveyUK]

Hi. It sounds like the problem isn't HIV as much as his depression which impacts HIV due to adherence issues.

I concur with the idea of getting him signed up here. With modern medication, the outlook really is fairly bright for most, with normal lifespans and ability to live a full and healthy life part of the package now. If he feels isolated at times then perhaps becoming a member here and engaging with others who have the condition will help.

[harleymc]

Hi Giitus,
 Hope you and your fella are traveling along well.

Glad his mood has lifted. Exercise and busyness/distraction have been helps for me too.

There are all sorts of tips and techniques to keep depression under control that have been discussed in the 'Mental Health and HIV' forum, you can't post there, but have a bit of a read through if you want. All the techniques will really require him to want to do them.

As to the pill taking, what I found useful from my neg partner, was a simple question, 'have you taken your medications?' What I didn't like was 'take your medications', that can be something to arc up about if life is giving you the sh!ts.

hugs

[Giitus]

Hi Harleymc,

I gave up on asking him if he took his meds. I dispense him the pill every night myself  and make him take it in front of me and check under his tongue to avoid any trickery.
He tried to play games but it did not work on me. I told him he can get depressed and suicidal whenever he wants but one thing will always remain it s the green pill every night.

[harleymc]

oh my, I've  never had to be supervised. That's quite a head space your man gets into.