Author Topic: Just got this text message (Read 7863 times)

skeebo1969 · « **on:** October 01, 2009, 03:54:41 pm »

I just got this text message from my 17 year old, who turns 18 in October by the way. It reads as follows:

"Daddy instead of the camera i wanted for my birthday i want to have (our last name), Thomas, Gabby, and Gia's name tattooed on my back...."

Boy oh boy, just awesome...... should make for an interesting conversation to say the least. I have a lot of tats and well I guess this is what I get. Should have known... She is a very good kid and has a 4.59 gpa on a 5.0 scale and is either going to college or the Navy when she finishes her senior year.... I'm definitely going to have to think this one through....

Any suggestions? I could act like I never saw the text and just go out and buy the damn camera... lol

Ann · « **Reply #1 on:** October 01, 2009, 04:04:56 pm »

I'd tell her I bought the camera last week.

Dale Parker · « **Reply #2 on:** October 01, 2009, 04:13:07 pm »

Hey Skeebo: I am not a big fan of tattoos. I think that artwork should be hung on walls not the body. But to each his or her own. It could be worse. At least with family names it's a pretty good bet that she's not going to divorce any of you. Husbands and wives names usually have to be removed when the relationship goes bad.
Maybe you should offer to pay for it. Call the tattoo guy put it on your charge card but make sure he does a nice butterfly or rose.
My last boss was female. She had Garfield on her left boob and would wear low but blouses. I found it disturbing when in a meeting Garfield would pop out and put his two cents worth in.

Snowangel · « **Reply #3 on:** October 01, 2009, 04:18:57 pm »

Skeebo-
LOL, I think it is kind of funny that she texted you instead of asking face to face, I guess that is modern technology for you.
Has having tattoos been an issue for you? If so, you could share with her what obstacles she might come up against.
I have one on my back and love it. It hasn't given me any problems so I think I would have a hard time telling my kids they couldn't get one, when they are old enough.
You have ink so you know that she needs to find someone with a good reputation and that will work with her on what designs she wants and knows how to spell.

If you went with the" I bought the digital camera already"- you could say she would be able to save more memories with camera and if she still wanted the tat next year you will use it take pictures of her while she is getting it.
Good Luck!
Snow

skeebo1969 · « **Reply #4 on:** October 01, 2009, 04:40:55 pm »

Quote from: Ann on October 01, 2009, 04:04:56 pm

I'd tell her I bought the camera last week.

That would give me too much time to save for the tat in October, thus I would have to then buy both. Come on Ann you're a mom, you know how the kiddies do us.

Quote from: Dale Parker on October 01, 2009, 04:13:07 pm

Maybe you should offer to pay for it. Call the tattoo guy put it on your charge card but make sure he does a nice butterfly or rose.
My last boss was female. She had Garfield on her left boob and would wear low but blouses. I found it disturbing when in a meeting Garfield would pop out and put his two cents worth in.

  I know a very good artist and my daughter has every intention of me footing the bill already, hence the b-day request. It's a touchy subject especially when I have them all over myself. I really can't create any meaniful arguement against it, she would view me as a hypocrit... well not really, but that's how I would be coming off.

  Perhaps, since it would be her first, I should talk her into getting something much smaller and in a less painful area. Like a little black dot on her big toe I was thinking.... easy to cover up and if a future prospective emploeyer should see it in the interview process she can sue the guy for sexual advances.

  Now is that some Skeeboish type thinking or what?

Quote from: Snowangel on October 01, 2009, 04:18:57 pm

Skeebo-
LOL, I think it is kind of funny that she texted you instead of asking face to face, I guess that is modern technology for you.
Has having tattoos been an issue for you? If so, you could share with her what obstacles she might come up against.
I have one on my back and love it. It hasn't given me any problems so I think I would have a hard time telling my kids they couldn't get one, when they are old enough.
You have ink so you know that she needs to find someone with a good reputation and that will work with her on what designs she wants and knows how to spell.
If you went with the" I bought the digital camera already"- you could say she would be able to save more memories with camera and if she still wanted the tat next year you will use it take pictures of her while she is getting it.
Good Luck!
Snow

Thanks Snow... still haven't responded to her text yet. I forwarded it to my ex wife and my wife, they usually team up with me on certain issues concerning my 17 year old. Neither of them are her mother, her mother is the other ex wife I don't get along with.... The one that only knows me by one name and that's "Motherfucker".

David_CA · « **Reply #5 on:** October 01, 2009, 04:45:37 pm »

Hmmm... I think I'd push for the camera, for all the good it'll do (to a 17-18 year old)!

There are a LOT of things that I thought of doing when I was that age that I'm glad I didn't do. Hell, there are things I've thought of doing in the past few years that I'm glad I didn't go through with! My thoughts? It's a lot easier to get a new camera in a few years than it is to change ones mind about a tattoo later on. Right or wrong, people are still judged, discriminated against, etc due to visible ink and other mods. Perhaps she'd go for something a bit more discreet? See you as a hypocrite? No, just somebody more experienced... just what every teenager wants to hear!

mecch · « **Reply #6 on:** October 01, 2009, 04:54:28 pm »

Tell her she is so beautiful why take the risk of the tatoo being ugly.

skeebo1969 · « **Reply #7 on:** October 01, 2009, 04:56:25 pm »

Quote from: David_NC on October 01, 2009, 04:45:37 pm

Hmmm... I think I'd push for the camera, for all the good it'll do (to a 17-18 year old)! There are a LOT of things that I thought of doing when I was that age that I'm glad I didn't do. Hell, there are things I've thought of doing in the past few years that I'm glad I didn't go through with! My thoughts? It's a lot easier to get a new camera in a few years than it is to change ones mind about a tattoo later on. Right or wrong, people are still judged, discriminated against, etc due to visible ink and other mods. Perhaps she'd go for something a bit more discreet? See you as a hypocrite? No, just somebody more experienced... just what every teenager wants to hear!

Well that's what my two cohorts and I are going to try and talk her into. Just got off the phone with both my wife and ex-wife. My ex-wife is going to get her sister into the mix and my wife is recruiting her mother. It really does take a village to raise a child. I could just tell her NO! But that doesn't work with this new generation so well, especially since her mother will then suddenly approve of it because I said no and pay for it herself.

skeebo1969 · « **Reply #8 on:** October 01, 2009, 04:57:16 pm »

Quote from: mecch on October 01, 2009, 04:54:28 pm

Tell her she is so beautiful why take the risk of the tatoo being ugly.

Going into my notes for discussion.. Thanks.

anniebc · « **Reply #9 on:** October 01, 2009, 06:21:28 pm »

Yep..tell her you already bought the camera...if she thinks she has to pay for the Tats herself she may think again about having them.

Hugs
Jan

BT65 · « **Reply #10 on:** October 01, 2009, 07:09:47 pm »

Yeah, I totally understand this. I have 8 tatts myself, and my daughter has a few tatts. Her first one was after my first granddaughter's birth. One of her friends (who's an artist) drew a pregnant flower, and my daughter just had to have it. I believe my daughter's tatts, though, are where they can be covered up.

David's 100% correct about employers not hiring due to tatts. I've had 3 places tell me "no visible tattoos." One thing about my daughter, I told her when she could pay for them, she could get them. So, that's what happened.

Now, about piercings, I paid for her tongue to be pierced when she turned 16, because it was promised to her. I suppose piercings and tatts can be on the same level. Good luck, this would definitely be a difficult thing to deal with. I understand, that, how can you tell your daughter not to get one now, when you have several? Been through the same thing. Maybe you can tell any lessons that have happened to you due to having several tatts.

Miss Philicia · « **Reply #11 on:** October 01, 2009, 07:17:24 pm »

I got my ears pierced before my mother had hers pierced -- my grandmother thought only white trash poked holes in their bodies, so it was forbidden when my mother was growing up and she didn't finally take the plunge until she was in her late 50's.

Everyone has tattoos in Philadelphia. And I'm talking about the "sleeve" ones that cover the entire arm. I've never seen so many tattoo shops as I have here.

skeebo1969 · « **Reply #12 on:** October 01, 2009, 07:59:34 pm »

Quote from: BT65 on October 01, 2009, 07:09:47 pm

Yeah, I totally understand this. I have 8 tatts myself, and my daughter has a few tatts.

And Betty this is what worries me, as you are probably already aware tats can be a little addictive. I am going to try and talk her into waiting till she is 25. I am going to buy the camera that she wants for her birthday. If she wants a tattoo she can pay for it herself. Hopefully her mother can back me up on this one....

Quote from: Miss Philicia on October 01, 2009, 07:17:24 pm

Everyone has tattoos in Philadelphia. And I'm talking about the "sleeve" ones that cover the entire arm. I've never seen so many tattoo shops as I have here.

Pretty much how it is here too. I noticed an explosion of shops since the start of that show Miami Ink.

BT65 · « **Reply #13 on:** October 01, 2009, 08:24:27 pm »

Yeah, I told my daughter if she wanted one, she'd have to pay for it, because when I was 16 and asked me dad for a car, that's what he told me.

Tatts are growing in popularity. It's just that I live in such a backwards part of the country, people still get horrified looks on their faces when they see me, and most of my tatts are visible. Like they think I'm going to rape and pillage or something.

GSOgymrat · « **Reply #14 on:** October 01, 2009, 08:41:04 pm »

So why not let her have tattoos? You're her role model and your have them. Everyone seems to have them nowadays... except me but I'm weird.

skeebo1969 · « **Reply #15 on:** October 01, 2009, 08:53:28 pm »

Quote from: GSOgymrat on October 01, 2009, 08:41:04 pm

So why not let her have tattoos? You're her role model and your have them. Everyone seems to have them nowadays... except me but I'm weird.

I'm not her role model. I am her father..... her father has made some mistakes and she is fully aware of all of them, my tattoos mainly reflect my very own mistakes I've made. You are absolutely right though in that she has a very legitimate argument as to why I am opposed to her getting them.

I've raised my children to be open minded and free thinkers sort of speak. My authority comes mainly from my experiences, this due to not really having a great father figure myself. Like I said she is a good kid, however she is not a kid anymore...

What ever she chooses is fine by me. The only demand I have for her is to wear her seatbelt... She's a good girl.... she'll be my baby whether she's tattooed up from head to toe.

Basquo · « **Reply #16 on:** October 01, 2009, 09:42:26 pm »

She should wait as long as possible before getting inked, in my opinion, because she's young and she's going to want to have lots more fun in the sun. What's going to happen in 10 years after she's had some partying under her belt? She's going to be 27 with a rockin' bod and blurry sun-damaged tattoos.

Did your folks pay for your tattoos? Mine didn't. In fact, I had to be so covert that I did my first two myself!

bocker3 · « **Reply #17 on:** October 01, 2009, 10:36:29 pm »

I'll tell you, from my experience, the more I tried to hold up my "mistakes" to my daughter as a lesson to be avoided, the more she seemed to want to head that way (she's so much like me, it scary at times). Remember that in a teenagers eyes, they know more than their parents. My daughter is nearly 30 now and we can chuckle over some of this, but the reality is -- she still tends to want to learn by "touching the hot stove" no matter how many examples I can give her on how I touched it and got burned. This isn't always true, but often.

So.... what have I learned from this? I give my advice, tell her that the choice is up to her -- that there isn't necessarily a right or wrong choice, but that each choice comes with its own consequences and that she needs to be prepared to live with those.

Funny thing is -- no matter how old they get, they want advice, but don't always take it.
Of course, as a 17 year old (for a short while, at any rate), you can make her wait. You also don't have to support it by paying for it, but once she's 18, she's probably going to do whatever she is going to do. Hell, at th0e end of the day, there could be worse things than a tatoo, right?? (of course, I have none and don't understand the draw of them either)

Good Luck,
Mike

fearless · « **Reply #18 on:** October 02, 2009, 12:29:05 am »

What about some reverse psychology. Get all enthuastic and over the top and suggest that rather than just the family names, she gets her whole back done, or something. Freak her out with your enthuasism.

I suspect trying to talk her out of it will just make her more determined.

Or, and this would be my approach, stick to your original plan and buy the camera. Say you have no issue with her getting tattoos with two provisos 1. they can be covered up, and 2. she pays for them herself. I assume that 18 she can just go get them anyway with or without your approval.

carousel · « **Reply #19 on:** October 02, 2009, 05:13:09 am »

Can't she get drunk and high and go and get them done on her own, like everybody else?

Oceanbeach · « **Reply #20 on:** October 02, 2009, 06:57:45 am »

My brother's second wife had Jim tattooed on one boob, Glenna on the other and a plus sign in the middle. Her name was Glenna but my brother is not named Jim. She also had the name Theresa on her arm.

She must have had buyers remorse over them because she burned Theresa out with a cigarette.

Glenna had all of this done when she was 16 and living with a 26 yr old Jim, who had a daughter named Theresa. Glenna and my brother were having dinner with us on hot summer evening ansd fell out of her blouse while reaching across the table for the butter.

I said, "Oh there is Glenna and Jim, I haven't seen them in a long time."

Have the best day
Michael

Hey Tom, you can give her the camera for her birthday and the tattoo for Christmas

BT65 · « **Reply #21 on:** October 02, 2009, 09:48:35 am »

My daughter never listened to me, whether by my word, or my example. Just like I never listened to my parents, and on and on.

Cr8on, you really did two tatts on yourself? (sorry for the brief hijack).

megasept · « **Reply #22 on:** October 02, 2009, 10:25:08 am »

Throw in a small tripod with the camera and tell her to wait 365 days before YOU will go get her that tattoo.

-megasept (who doesn't have any ink)

Florida69 · « **Reply #23 on:** October 02, 2009, 11:10:12 am »

my two cents. I raised my youngest brother (he is 26 now) and he begged me for a tattoo and/or a piercing when he was a teenager. I said that until he as 18 his body belonged to me, that I would be the first to sue anyone who would tattoo his body before he was 18, and if I saw a piercing I had the right to pull it out. I never saw it, but heard that he got a prince Albert when he was 16. He was rebellious to say the least. When he was 20 and on the one year anniversary of mom's death, he and I got the same tattoo on our shoulder, the same tattoo that my mom had on her shoulder. I paid for it. It is really important for the tattoo to mean something, which it does being your names. You should show her some pictures of people going over board on getting inked and explain to her why it is necessary for her to be sure this is really what she wants. Also, maybe she can split the cost, that way it never comes back to bite you. Good luck. D

skeebo1969 · « **Reply #24 on:** October 02, 2009, 01:42:11 pm »

Quote from: BT65 on October 02, 2009, 09:48:35 am

My daughter never listened to me, whether by my word, or my example. Just like I never listened to my parents, and on and on.

Cr8on, you really did two tatts on yourself? (sorry for the brief hijack).

I pierced my ear myself. One ice cube on each side to numb it then stuck a big fat sewing needle through.... the sound of the needle going through the grissle is quite audible when you slowly go through... and you can use the tears as lubricant on the needle... and since tears are salty I'm sure it keeps infection down.

That was the seventh grade...... unfortunately my father ripped it out at the supper table that night in a drunken rage. I am still amazed how he did it though.... he never took the screw on back off or anything, just ripped that sucker out, and would you believe it didn't even make any sounds like when it was going in? however it did bleed quite a bit.

Sorry for the hijack....

BT65 · « **Reply #25 on:** October 02, 2009, 03:26:46 pm »

Quote from: skeebo1969 on October 02, 2009, 01:42:11 pm

unfortunately my father ripped it out at the supper table that night in a drunken rage. I am still amazed how he did it though.... he never took the screw on back off or anything, just ripped that sucker out, and would you believe it didn't even make any sounds like when it was going in? however it did bleed quite a bit.

That's terrible, Tom. Now I know what you mean about not having a good father figure.

skeebo1969 · « **Reply #26 on:** October 02, 2009, 03:55:40 pm »

Quote from: BT65 on October 02, 2009, 03:26:46 pm

That's terrible, Tom. Now I know what you mean about not having a good father figure.

Awww he wasn't that bad though... He did teach me how to work on a car, cast a fishing pole, and best of all he proudly raised me to hate the Dallas Cowboys.

Everything has been handled. My ex told her she better not ever come home with anything tattooed on her body. She wants the camera now.

Basquo · « **Reply #27 on:** October 05, 2009, 07:02:24 pm »

Quote from: BT65 on October 02, 2009, 09:48:35 am

My daughter never listened to me, whether by my word, or my example. Just like I never listened to my parents, and on and on.

Cr8on, you really did two tatts on yourself? (sorry for the brief hijack).

Yes, ma'am, I sure did. An "X" and a small lightning bolt, both on the inside of my left foot just below my ankle. I used a hypodermic filled with India ink and lots of cotton balls and rubbing alcohol.

BT65 · « **Reply #28 on:** October 05, 2009, 08:51:25 pm »

Quote from: Basquo on October 05, 2009, 07:02:24 pm

Yes, ma'am, I sure did. An "X" and a small lightning bolt, both on the inside of my left foot just below my ankle. I used a hypodermic filled with India ink and lots of cotton balls and rubbing alcohol.

EEK! (sorry for the brief hijack)

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