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Author Topic: Unprotected sex with escort  (Read 649 times)

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Offline scaredbuthopeful

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Unprotected sex with escort
« on: October 11, 2021, 04:35:52 pm »
Hi everyone, thanks in advance for the responses and help.

So here's my story

4 years ago, I had unprotected insertive anal sex with a "high end" escort and panicked about potentially catching HIV. I waited 10 days, did the RNA test which came back negative and followed up with another test after 6 weeks which also came back negative.

Due to a lapse in judgement, I ended up back yesterday with the same escort and again had unprotected insertive anal sex (less than 1 minute) before I realized I didn't want to go through the anxiety again, so I pulled out and put on a condom.

Like last time, she assured me that she ONLY has unprotected sex with me. I know that her saying that doesn't say much but i did text her from a different phone number once asking for bareback and she refused.

She keeps assuring me that shes clean with no risk of exposure and to be honest part of me believes her because last time she said the same thing and I ended up testing negative but my anxiety just wont let me relax about it.

20 hours after the exposure yesterday, I started PEP. My question is, do you think PEP is worth it in my situation?

Pro: 1)lowers risk of infection
cons:1) delays testing thereby increasing my anxiety window (not knowing if I have HIV for atleast 40 days (RNA) and 2.5 months until PCR.

Not taking PEP, would allow me to get tested in the next 10 days and if negative I would probably calm down. But if I were to test positive in the future, I would kick myself for not sticking to the PEP.

Given my situation, what would you advise me to do? I know that ultimately its my decision but it would be great to hear some of your thoughts


P.S I am circumcised

Online Jim Allen

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Re: Unprotected sex with escort
« Reply #1 on: October 11, 2021, 07:21:51 pm »
Hiya,

You had a potential exposure from condomless intercourse and started PEP early.

PEP is highly effective, finish the course and test. Test at 6 weeks post finishing PEP with a blood drawn (Lab) HIV antibodies test, this result would rarely ever change. If you want you can retest at 3 months for peace of mind.

Quote
She keeps assuring me that shes clean with no risk of exposure

Glad to hear that the sex worker washes and without exposure to dirtiness. I had a shower this morning as well, I'm very clean, living with HIV doesn't make me dirty either.

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, every time, no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of HIV protection

Keep in mind that some sexual practices described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please do get tested regularly and at least yearly for all STI's including but not limited to HIV and test more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and, the only way of knowing is by testing.

Kind regards

Jim

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As a member of the "Do I have HIV?" The forum you are required to only post in this one thread no matter how long between visits or the subject matter. You can find this thread by going to your profile and selecting show own post and it will take you here. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Any additional threads will be deleted.
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

Offline scaredbuthopeful

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Re: Unprotected sex with escort
« Reply #2 on: October 12, 2021, 09:06:30 am »
Hi Jim!

Thanks for your response and my sincerest apologies for the "clean" comment. I didn't realize how insensitive and inaccurate of a statement it was.

I have 2 follow up questions please:

1) I realize that PEP is highly effective. Whilst i thought taking it would calm me down, I for some reason keep thinking "what if i am once of the people it doesnt work for. I've scoured the internet looking for PEP failures, one of which was on this site.

I guess what I'm asking is how many PEP failures have you seen on the forum and was it from activity similar to mine?

2) I know that the 6 week test post PEP is the gold standard, but for the sake of my sanity, would an RNA test 11 days after PEP be accurate to any extent?

I know that I need to calm down, and theres nothing I can do at this point but wait and test. So I apologize for digging.
« Last Edit: October 12, 2021, 09:29:36 am by Jim Allen »

Online Jim Allen

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Re: Unprotected sex with escort
« Reply #3 on: October 12, 2021, 10:02:59 am »
Hiya,

I removed the link as it's an individuals story, not fact, although even taking the story at face value, it's potentially late PEP & overconfidence in RNA testing with continued risk-taking. It's not relevant to this assessment.

1)
Look, you had a potential exposure. You can't change that and no amount of worrying, reading stories or thinking up "what ifs" will change the outcome.

The good news is that the odds are in your favour even without PEP, and with the PEP that you started promptly, I would expect a non-reactive result when you test as per guidelines posted in my first answer.

All you can do is take the PEP as prescribed and test to confirm the result. The worst-case scenario I suppose is the PEP fails & you have sufficient exposure resulting in you living with HIV. Now, although HIV is best avoided, it's not the end of the world.

Anyhow, whilst waiting to finish the PEP & testing, focus on living your life, practice safer sex. Remember to also test for other easier to aquire STI's as well.

2) I've given you the guidelines. If you feel testing sooner than the guidelines provided with an RNA test will give you some sanity, go ahead. However, I'm not going to recommend it or say it's accurate though. 
« Last Edit: October 12, 2021, 03:24:46 pm by Jim Allen »
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

 


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