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Author Topic: very worried  (Read 29014 times)

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Offline GONE MAD

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very worried
« on: August 16, 2008, 04:30:15 pm »
i am female who last year june had sex with a guy he push in my vagina and stay about 5 seconds b4 i pushed him off and he placed a condom on.he claims to test negative.i also have an oral relationship with a guy one time which he ejaculated in my mouth and i swallowed(last september)i am sure i didnt brush my teeth b4 but may have had an impacted tooth.he also claims to have been tested in april of 08.im june i hav unprotected sex with a friend who didnt ejaculate in me (one occasion)and tested negative a few weeks after he also claims.what are my risks provided one of them are actually hiv positive.

Offline Ann

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Re: very worried
« Reply #1 on: August 16, 2008, 04:50:08 pm »
GM,

Unless you're in a securely monogamous relationship where you have tested for all STIs together, you cannot rely on what someone tells you about their hiv status or sexual health in general. As such, you need to test at three months folowing your last incident of unprotected intercourse to determine your true hiv status.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #2 on: August 16, 2008, 04:54:34 pm »
soo now im am extremely scared as i was exposed to precum

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #3 on: August 16, 2008, 04:57:00 pm »
and what about me swallowing the cum?'

Offline Ann

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Re: very worried
« Reply #4 on: August 16, 2008, 06:01:46 pm »
GM,

Swallowing cum isn't much of a concern. Being infected through giving head is more theoretical than something that happens in the real world. Saliva has over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect. Along with that, there are very few of the kind of cells present in the mouth that hiv needs to latch on to in order to infect a person.

While precum during intercourse is a risk, it isn't as large a risk as full ejaculation.

You do have a good chance of coming out of this ok, but please learn from the experience and make sure your partner is wearing a condom in future.

The earliest you should test is at six weeks, as the vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by this time. A six week negative MUST be confirmed at the three month point.

Keep yourself productively busy - and stay off hiv internet websites - while you wait for the appropriate time to test.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #5 on: August 16, 2008, 06:23:06 pm »
trust me my biggest enemy are the sites ive been driving myself crazy including the person.because he is set on he has been tested he is negative since i was the first of his for teh year and wants to no how i hav tested.i have had severe muscle pain which was associated with hypocalcaemia which i wouldunderstand because i dont drink milk or any substistutes.afetr which drinking the pains stop but i cant help to wonder.its driving me nuts i cant focis on anything.i have learned from this lesson i assure you and myself.i just hope that the partner is telling the truth.

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #6 on: August 16, 2008, 06:27:13 pm »
i am awaitin gmy results which i will get monday im extremely scared and then i would have to waitfor the 3month mark as you said that would truly destroy me.i actually thought i would of have some closure with this test but unfortunately itsjus another period of high panic

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #7 on: August 16, 2008, 06:32:06 pm »
but another thing  that i dont seem to understand is when exactly does precum comes outof the penis is it before ejaculationor during and erection

Offline Ann

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Re: very worried
« Reply #8 on: August 16, 2008, 06:45:24 pm »
GM,

The prefix "pre" means before. Precum is the wetness a guy gets on the head of his dick when he's sexually excited. Before he cums.

Hypocalcaemia means having low levels of calcium in your system, so that makes sense if you don't drink much milk or eat dairy products like cheese. Maybe you should include more dairy products in your diet or ask your doctor about calcium suppliments.

Once again, you do have a good chance of coming out of this ok. However, please learn from this and stop taking chances with your health. It's not just hiv you could be exposing yourself to. Some of the other, easier to catch sexually transmitted infections can make it hard for you to have a baby in future. You can test at six weeks to give yourself some peace of mind. If that test is negative, it's not likely to change, but you need to confirm the result at three months.

Make sure your man is wearing a condom before he has sex with you. You can tell him "no glove, no love".

Hang in there.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #9 on: August 16, 2008, 06:52:16 pm »
OMG YOUR SOO HELPFULL YOUR BRINGING ME TO TEARS I DONT DRINK MILK AND I DONT REALLY EAT CHEESE DONT REALLY FANCY ICECREAM OR MILK SHAKES NES QUICK OR ANY OF THAT STUFF.ONCE A MONTH MAYBE..AFTER I STARTED TO DRINK THE MILK AND OTHER SUBSTITUTINS THAT PAINS STOPPED.I WAS TOLD BY A NURSE TO DRINK MILK.ALSO I HAD A SWOLLEN BALL AT THE SIDE OF MY EAR IN FRONT MY DOCTOR TOLD ME THAT IT WAS  SWOLLEN TISSUE DUE TO THE FACT THAT MY GLASSES FRAME WAS TOO TIGHT WHICH THEY REALLY WERE AND PAINFULL THAT I HAD TO GET IT LOOSEN.ITS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE ASWOLLEN PREAURICULAR LYMPH NODE THERE?HE SAID IT WAS TISSUE AND TOLD ME IF IT WAS BIGGER THEN I SHOULD OF WORRIED BUT I DONT NO WHAT TO BELIEVE

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #10 on: August 16, 2008, 06:54:38 pm »
I always had the misconception of precum arriving right before he cums i actually didnt no it was alltrough out his erection.i thought it was right b4

Offline Ann

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Re: very worried
« Reply #11 on: August 16, 2008, 07:00:38 pm »
GM,

Believe your doctor about the swollen gland. It's nothing to do with hiv.

Like I said before, get productively busy with other things and do yourself a favour by staying off hiv websites. They'll never tell you your hiv status - only the appropriate test at the appropriate time will.

About the precum - no, it's not necessarily right before he cums. Have you ever noticed that the head of some men's dicks gets all sticky and wet soon after they get a hard-on? (they don't all do this) That's what's known as precum. It's still infectious, but it's thought to be slightly less infectious than proper cum. It's not anything to worry about unless he sticks it in your anus or vagina without a condom on. Remember, no glove, no love.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #12 on: August 16, 2008, 07:14:26 pm »
soo it has to be of a certain concentration you could say?im sticking off the sites and gona tlk to the  person again just now to tell him go get re tested also

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #13 on: August 16, 2008, 07:16:17 pm »
well thats what happened it was in my vagina and thats why im soo worried and scared.everything just happening socoincedentally i think the hypocalcaemia thing scary.all of a sudden my bones started to hurt mewhen i was thinking about actually getting infecting

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #14 on: August 16, 2008, 07:19:44 pm »
he actually told me thats its not a gland but i dont no exactly what it is he said swollen tissue due to the pressure of my glasses and honestly i dont no whta to believe

Offline Ann

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Re: very worried
« Reply #15 on: August 16, 2008, 07:33:38 pm »
GM,

Hypocalcaemia has NOTHING to do with hiv. It's to do with your diet or it could be hereditary, which means you got it from your family, like blue eyes or brown hair. Please work with your doctor about this - it can be dealt with.

Please hun, learn from this. You have a very, very good chance of coming out of this absolutely fine, but you need to stop having unprotected intercourse. I know, it can be easier said than done with some men, but you need to be firm. No glove, no love. It's just not worth it.

Have you been check out for the other sexually transmitted infections? You can test for them ten days to two week after, or sooner if you develop symptoms like a nasty discharge from your vagina. Please know that not all of the other STIs will have obvious symptoms, so it's best to get checked out regardless of symptoms. You are FAR more likely to have picked up something like chlamydia from all this. Hiv actually has a pretty hard time infecting people compared to the other infections out there.

There are no glands that I'm aware of in front of the ear. It's totally possible that it IS just swollen tissue. I wear glasses too and I can totally imagine how tight ones could make that area of your face swell up. Listen to your doctor on this. I'm also hiv positive and I've never had that part of my face swell - but my glasses aren't tight. It's nothing to do with hiv and everything to do with how your glasses fit.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #16 on: August 16, 2008, 07:56:54 pm »
thanx my mum who is a nurse and works in the hospital and her nurse friends is who said my weak bones are due to hypocalcaemia wen my muscles started to hurt they ask me if i drink milk and i said no because it is no.and my mum also told me its from excessive drinking of alcohol which i do sometimes no sex occurs then.and she said that she had weak bones too at my age like i twist my ankle really easy even before the exposure.i jus thought that muscle pain meant sumthing and also i had on extremely painful shoes for 10 hrs straight and it hurt for a week after. really.  tignling ND STUFF WHICH MADE ME CRY FOR DAYS OF TEH THOUGHT OF WHAT COULD POSSIBLE BE GOING ON YOU kNOw.its not swollen jus a lil ball under teh skin he felt it and he was like its tissue.i actually got soo obsessed atime i scrubed my tongue until it bled and was afraid i had trush of the mouth,i have been tested for syphhilis which i would get the results for monday.thats is for unprotected sex forme i promised i cud of stop these incidents bcause i wasnt forced.i wana be a octor im starting  university come september and i actually think this happened b4 i went to live on my own for a reason to no to be more carefull and to know what field to go into.cause this is serious

Offline RapidRod

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Re: very worried
« Reply #17 on: August 16, 2008, 08:05:21 pm »
How about hypokalemia? That will cause cramps, muscle pains.

Offline Ann

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Re: very worried
« Reply #18 on: August 16, 2008, 08:15:23 pm »
GM,

Look hun, none of this stuff you're worried about has the slightest thing to do with hiv.

It's time you either got off the internet or go do some non-hiv surfing or check your MySpace (if you have one) or whatever. You've got every chance of coming out of this ok so don't work yourself up into a freak out about it. Stressing yourself out is only going to make you feel ill.

I already talked to you about swallowing cum:


Swallowing cum isn't much of a concern. Being infected through giving head is more theoretical than something that happens in the real world. Saliva has over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect. Along with that, there are very few of the kind of cells present in the mouth that hiv needs to latch on to in order to infect a person.


Don't stress about the blowjob. It's not a problem.

I'm not going to answer you any more right now. Take a few deep breaths and go get on with your life for now. All the stressing in the world isn't going to change a damned thing. OK?

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Ann

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Re: very worried
« Reply #19 on: August 16, 2008, 08:20:13 pm »
Ooooo.... that's weird. When I tried to post, I got one of those "someone beat you to it" warnings, but it was reply #3 that I saw, instead of RapidRod's post. The software has gone mental. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. ;D
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #20 on: August 16, 2008, 08:25:20 pm »
im goin to relax check my face book and try to no thik about it but ill try to go get those other std test done also .tanx

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #21 on: August 17, 2008, 10:55:02 am »
HEY im back what i was wondering do all the syptomshappen at once or separated.might get my results tomoro most likely and i super scared i know nothign could change now but im sooo scared..regarding my circumstances by the way i am acting the person who i did it with is concern if i do have it.he was like he got tested and it was negative but does he have to do it again because of m.i swallowed cum and well the possible exposure last year june

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #22 on: August 17, 2008, 04:49:25 pm »
what i wanted to no also im giving oral sex if u bit ur receiver by mistake or scrap his dick wud you getg infected?if he is hiv positive?

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #23 on: August 17, 2008, 09:35:17 pm »
an cud i hav gotten infected from the seconds he was in me b4 he placed the condom on?

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #24 on: August 18, 2008, 12:04:27 am »
ok now im extremely scared because they say muscle aches and pains are associated with hiv infection.thats the only syptom i have im sooo scared cause it was soo severe i had too see a doctor.but after drinking milk it stop i get minor ones but im sooo scared now thhis is the worse ever

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #25 on: August 18, 2008, 12:05:32 am »
i am even starting to think that sum1 sneaked into my house while i was sleeping and raped me and gave me hiv because i was sleeping off a hangover i cant remember.seriously.dis is scary

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #26 on: August 18, 2008, 12:06:00 am »
it might seem silly but possible nextthing they saw me stumble in

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: very worried
« Reply #27 on: August 18, 2008, 03:32:04 am »
Mad,

I would have answered your question earlier but I simply cannot fathom what you're talking about. Perhaps if you stopped using SMS "text speek" and start using at least a basic level of standard English someone might respond.

MtD

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #28 on: August 18, 2008, 07:51:46 am »
I WANTED TO NO IF I COULD GET INFECTEDFROM A FEW SECSOF EXPOSURE TO PRECUM AND IF ALL SYPTOM OCCUR AT ONCE IF THEY DO OCCUR

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: very worried
« Reply #29 on: August 18, 2008, 07:58:41 am »
Better.

But typing in all caps is CONSIDERED TO BE SHOUTING.

Try again. In normal letters and normal English.

We'll be waiting. :)

MtD

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: very worried
« Reply #30 on: August 18, 2008, 08:02:25 am »
You don't have an HIV problem but you do seem to have a problem ABOUT HIV. I recommend that you see a therapist or other professional and get some help with your concerns. We can't help you with that problem in this setting.

Andy Velez

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #31 on: August 18, 2008, 08:06:16 am »
Im sorry i was'nt shouting.i was wandering if a few seconds of exposure to precum could make me vulnerable tohiv infection.and if syptoms do occur.does it happen all at once or one at a time like how my only syptom is muscle spasms that after i enter vigourous amounts of dairy products went away.i had the cold like 2months fater exposure but no fever oranything but it was cold season in my country.well flu season.

Offline atlq

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Re: very worried
« Reply #32 on: August 18, 2008, 08:07:23 am »
I WANTED TO NO IF I COULD GET INFECTEDFROM A FEW SECSOF EXPOSURE TO PRECUM AND IF ALL SYPTOM OCCUR AT ONCE IF THEY DO OCCUR

Mad,

Ann has already answered these questions for you in this thread. You say you are getting your results today, so why not do yourself a huge favor and get off the computer....for a while. Based on the info you have provided, the overwhelming probability is that you will be negative. Obsessing about things like ARS symptoms is pointless.....All the best.... ( and to back up Matty, yeah typing in all caps is the equivalent of shouting in our faces...there is no need for that...we hear you.... :)

“Keep up the good work....   And God bless you.”
  --  Sarah Palin, to members of the Alaskan Independence Party, 2008

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #33 on: August 18, 2008, 08:09:56 am »
i am aslo afraid of soo many other things you make think is silly i started to think that a day someone had interferred with me in my home i was sleeping and highly intoxicated 3 months ago and thats been sending me up a racket because i cant remember.thinking they must of say my state as i stumbled in.people aid that i would of known or feel.but i cant remember.and it scares me also.

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #34 on: August 18, 2008, 08:13:20 am »
i am sorry that it seems as if i was shouting trust me i wasnt.i am not in my country at the moment.im in the states and well the clinic will allow my dad to receive my results.its nerverecking cause i haveto be told over the phone.no disrespect forthe caps.i am very thankfull for all of you alls help it is and was greatly appreciated..but im extremely scared..i think my problem is i cant belive that i might have a chance of coming outof this ok andam afraid to relax andget dissapointed

Offline Ann

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Re: very worried
« Reply #35 on: August 18, 2008, 08:15:52 am »
GM,

There's no way someone would have come into your home and raped you without you knowing.

This is not the place to address your rape concerns anyway. If you are seriously concerned about rape, call your local rape crisis center. We cannot help you with that here.

You're just going to have to sit tight until your results come in. There's no point in rehashing what you've already told us and asked us. Our answers are not going to change so just re-read your thread.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #36 on: August 18, 2008, 08:25:50 am »
i know i was thinking about that i would have remembered even if ti was just one bit.but what i was concerned of is that its not hypocalcaemia but peripheral neuropathy which i saw was caused by hiv infection.

Offline Ann

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Re: very worried
« Reply #37 on: August 18, 2008, 08:31:32 am »
GM,

The presence or absence of symptoms means nothing where hiv is concerned. The only way to diagnose hiv infection is through testing and for that reason, we do NOT discuss symptoms here. If you feel unwell, see your doctor.

Keep going on about symptoms and you'll be given a time out.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline atlq

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Re: very worried
« Reply #38 on: August 18, 2008, 08:37:34 am »
Mad,

You ARE NOT listening..(and yes the caps are on purpose)... you are not going to have peripheral neuropathy from an HIV infection this soon...it is nerve damage and in most cases it takes years to manifest.....but this is irrelevant...your test results will be in today, correct? Then what is the point of playing the symptom game? As you have been told, symptoms are meaningless when it comes to determining HIV infection. Stop this.....it is not helping you...  
“Keep up the good work....   And God bless you.”
  --  Sarah Palin, to members of the Alaskan Independence Party, 2008

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #39 on: August 18, 2008, 08:45:33 am »
im scared thats all

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #40 on: August 18, 2008, 08:50:03 am »
i know that your thinking that im not the first to go through this and im certainly not gooing to be the last but i just cant help to sit here and wonder you know.i think im okay but i just keep coming up with reasons as  to why it could be and i cant help it.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: very worried
« Reply #41 on: August 18, 2008, 08:58:33 am »
Your last comment confirms to me that it would be helpful if you saw a counselor or other professional to get some support to deal with your fears. Doing that is beyond the scope of what we can do for you here.
Andy Velez

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #42 on: August 18, 2008, 09:16:54 am »
i know i would even after my results.

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #43 on: August 18, 2008, 10:46:00 am »
i know that u you say that cant judge but symptoms but i cant help it really.i scrapped my tongue with my finger soo hard one time that it bled and i thought it was trush i dont even have the slightest clue what it is

Offline atlq

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Re: very worried
« Reply #44 on: August 18, 2008, 11:21:54 am »
Andy is spot on with his advice. You need to get some professional support to deal with your fear.....    People here dispense advice about HIV transmission and testing. We are not therapists. Your risk of contracting HIV from the incident you described is slight. I think the damage you are doing to yourself emotionally is the real issue here...
“Keep up the good work....   And God bless you.”
  --  Sarah Palin, to members of the Alaskan Independence Party, 2008

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #45 on: August 18, 2008, 11:57:19 am »
i no but i cant help it sorry.

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #46 on: August 18, 2008, 12:36:24 pm »
i am not getting my results again today my dad forgot me.

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #47 on: August 18, 2008, 12:41:01 pm »
but i cant help but ask i havnt found nething concerning being exposed to precum like cases i no they are and it has happened.soo if one of them were hiv positive what are the chances from the precum

Offline GONE MAD

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Re: very worried
« Reply #48 on: August 18, 2008, 01:18:17 pm »
could anyone answer my question? what are the chances of being infected from hiv infected precum

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: very worried
« Reply #49 on: August 18, 2008, 03:44:57 pm »
Even assuming the person you have in mind is HIV+, the likelihood of infection via a single instance of brief contact with precum is very, very unlikely.

Also, even IF you have thrush, it is not an HIV-specific occurence.

You need to work at getting busy with other things in your life while awaiting your test result. Doing that will really help the waiting time to pass much more quickly and easily.
Andy Velez

 


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