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Author Topic: I am really scared!!  (Read 28551 times)

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Offline SoScared

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I am really scared!!
« on: July 28, 2006, 03:30:18 am »
Hi Guys!

I feel so lucky to have found this site.  Here's my story -

I went to one of those porn theatres a while back and got naked with another guy.  We rubbed up against eachother and we came on eachother and some of his semen got on my penis. 

About 3 weeks after the incident my lymph nodes in my neck, groin, and leg all got VERY swollen.  Also, I had these little white bumps on one side of my cheek and 3 mouth ulcers.  I had achy muscles a few nights and I would wake up hot some nights, but never sweating.  Also there were about 3 instances that I had began to feel really sick and got a bad head cold but it always went away within a few hours. 

At about the 5 week mark I took an HIV test and to my relief it was negative.  Also, around that time my symptoms started to die down a little.

Now it has been 8 weeks and all of the symptoms are gone except one of the nodes in my neck is still swollen.  For some reason this has made me scared again.

I am scared because I was feeling really bad between the 3-5 week mark and now I am fine.  I'm worried that that could mean that I have it...

I will get tested again in a few weeks but I just wanted some help from the professionals...

Oh, and I tested negative at 5 weeks, however, the symptoms were strong.  Normally do you test positive when feeling ARS symptoms?

Also, when I called to get my test results, they were saying how it could take up to 6 months to detect HIV so I should retest.  I was wondering if they tell everyone this (it was a recording) or they may have detected a some antibodies but not enough to say I was HIV positive so they were telling me to retest because of that.

Sorry this was so long, I am really losing it right about now and I just need a little advice guys.  Thanks!


Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #1 on: July 28, 2006, 03:43:45 am »
I read that you said that you never did anythin to put you at risk, only heavy pettin and things like that, so did you get infected from heavy petting?  just wondering because i have had ALL the symptoms but all I did was masturbation that involved semen on my penis...

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #2 on: July 28, 2006, 04:49:58 am »
So,

You have not had a risk of hiv infection, so whatever is going on with you has nothing to do with hiv.

Successfull hiv infection occurs INSIDE the human body, as in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. What you describe happened OUTSIDE the body and is called frottage (rubbing genitals together) and mutual masturbation. Neither of these are hiv transmission risks.

You need to get to your doctor about your symptoms to find out the real cause and that real cause won't be hiv. You didn't have a risk.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #3 on: July 28, 2006, 05:37:46 am »
So,

I moved your post that you made in the Newly Tested Poz forum into your thread here. You are NOT permitted to post in that forum. Please do not do so again. Ever. Read through the Welcome Thread and take careful note of our posting guidelines.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #4 on: August 01, 2006, 09:34:46 pm »
Thanks a lot for the response Ann.  I was just wondering about the testing.  For my own peace of mind, I will test once more but I was just wondering if the test would pick up the virus if you did have ARS symptoms.  I was reading that Home Access uses 1st generation testing and that it may not pick up the virus during seroconversion.

Offline AIDS2HIV

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #5 on: August 01, 2006, 09:58:38 pm »
no risk = no need to test, and you had NO RISK from what you described*

however....KNOWING your status is the single biggest tool you can have in your HIV toolbox.

The skin is an excellent barrier from HIV, infection can only occur inside the body. and NO, it cant soak through your skin, so dont think that it can. Myself, i would suggest that you KNOW your status, and take the test. If you dont know what the risks ARENT, then you probably dont know what they ARE either
Its the future of Hiv Education, and Resources www.aids2hiv.com      Got Community?

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #6 on: August 01, 2006, 10:03:02 pm »
thanks for the reply, and i know it cant soak through skin...  i just want to know if a 1st gen test would normally pick up the virus if you're still experiencing ARS.  I am not worried that it may have soaked through my skin, I am worried that it may have gotten into my urethra.  Thanks anyways though!

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #7 on: August 02, 2006, 02:12:14 am »
There has never, ever been a scientific document or even an anecdotal case of someone getting infected (or even being able to infect a simian or primate) with HIV from transferred vaginal fluids. HIV just can't survive the trip, for one thing. Also, the fluids which emerge from a female during sexual arousal are much thinner and not infectious compared to the thicker cervical mucousa deep inside the vagina.

This is why fingering, performing oral sex on a woman, and handling condoms/ masturbating with vaginal fluids on your hands will NOT infect you with HIV.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #8 on: August 02, 2006, 01:22:07 pm »
thanks again for the response. 
 ...but it was semen, not vaginal fluids.

Im in about my ninth week now and most of the symptoms are gone now except the lymph node in the right side of my neck is still huge and when i woke up this morning a lymph node in my groin had gotten really big. 


i thank you all for all the help, i really do, but this is just all too... what's the word?.... ironic? yeah.  ironic!

I guess my main question would be how accurate was the 5th week test if one was still going through the ARS symptoms and the test was a 1st generation.  And does Home Access tell everyone that they should retest in 6 months...

THanks guys!  you are life savers!
« Last Edit: August 02, 2006, 01:30:20 pm by SoScared »

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #9 on: August 02, 2006, 02:28:48 pm »
Since you didn't have a risk, it doesn't matter when you test. As for ARS affecting the test results, the answer is NO. See your doctor for you swollen nodes, it's not an HIV concern.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #10 on: August 02, 2006, 08:41:13 pm »
My repsonse is the same for semen as for vaginal fluids. Mutual masturbation is NOT a risk for HIV.

As an HIV counselor, we suggest the exact activity you write about to people who wish to remain negative as safer sex. Because it presents no HIV risk.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #11 on: August 03, 2006, 11:11:50 pm »
hey guys!

Thanks a lot for your feed back, it really has helped me a lot.  I promise I will leave you guys alone as I see you have so many other people to help other than me.  I just had a concern.

I am so scared guys.

When I say scared, I mean, seriously.

I know you are say that there isnt anyway to get infected by mutual masturbation or oral but there are people in the newly infected forum who claim to have been infected this way. 

It really scares me that semen could have gotten into my urethra and I have experienced ALL of the symptoms including ones such as thrush, that really dont have anything to do with any other STI except hiv. 

I STILL have the swollen lymph nodes that feel funny sometimes and thats when I know theyre swelling, and I STILL have the white bumps in my mouth... I dont have the flu-like symptoms any more however.

Is there any other STI or anythig that my symtoms sound like?  The only one that they resemble to me is hiv... I am so scared....  I wake up scared, I got to sleep scred... I am just scared. 

I am a college student and funds are limited so whenever I can scrape up some extra cash I do plan on getting another test.  Also, does anyone know about how much a full std panel would run? 

Thanks guys for your continued support through these very hard weeks.

Offline Morgan

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #12 on: August 04, 2006, 12:10:58 am »
SoScared,

You can be as afraid as you want, it just won't change the science of hiv transmission.  You didn't have a risk for hiv infection and your 5 week negative test is an excellent indication of your status.

Morgan
Morgan Landers

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #13 on: August 04, 2006, 03:50:17 am »
SoScared, take thrush off your list. Anyone can get thrush for many reasons. 

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #14 on: August 04, 2006, 05:03:12 am »
So,

Most universities have clinics available for students to use. Go there and ask for STI testing. You are very unlikely to become infected with anything from your mutual masturbation incident and you will NOT have become infected with hiv through it.

And by the way, just because someone might CLAIM to be infected that way doesn't mean they were. Hiv is NOT transmitted through mutual masturbation. The stigma surrounding the real transmission routes can make people say all sorts of things, while drugs and/or alcohol can make people forget what they've done under the influence. We do NOT go by patient report here in this forum, we go by tried and tested scientific knowledge and documented, researched transmission evidence.

Mutual masturbation is NOT a risk for hiv transmission and infection. Never has been, never will be. There does not exist one documented case of transmission in this manner and you will NOT be the first.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #15 on: August 06, 2006, 06:49:14 am »
THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE!! YOU HAVE REALLY HELPED ME ALOT!!

I am starting to actually believe that maybe I don't have HIV, stil scared though, but convinced. 

I will still test at the 13 week mark just to be totally sure that my luck doesn't make me the 1st person infected this way.

Question :  By the time you are experiencing ARS should HIV be present in the blood?  Just wondering.

I wouldn't be so scard but ALL the symptoms of HIV appeard and dissapeared right on scheduale, whcih really scares me.  But I will try and keep a clear head for a few more weeks.

Once again thanks for all your help.  You dont know how much you have helped people who are silently going through one of the scariest times of their lives.  Thanks.  God bless.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #16 on: August 06, 2006, 08:01:30 am »
All your symptoms that you had would appear and disappear at the same time too with the flu or other more prevalent illnesses. Again, You Did Not Have A Risk.

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #17 on: August 06, 2006, 06:39:16 pm »
well the swollen lymph nodes are still here, and the fear does not seem to be going anywhere...

and i have also been having crazy mouth problems for the last couple of weeks, at one time i had 4 ulcers at the same time!  now they just come and go one by one and the thrush is still there... 

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #18 on: August 06, 2006, 07:03:17 pm »
See your doctor for you illness. It's not HIV.

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #19 on: August 06, 2006, 07:16:04 pm »
i see that RapidRod suggested that someone else tested at a clinic instead of using HomeAccess, I was wondering why is that?  Is it because HomeAccess is 1st gen.  is it less reliable?  just wondering...

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #20 on: August 06, 2006, 07:22:03 pm »
All FDA approved tests are equally reliable, whether they are first generation or 4th, after 12 weeks past exposure.

I can't speak for Rapidrod, but I submit that the counseling that comes with the clinic setting makes a real difference (assuming that the clinic is up to date and accurate in their HIV counseling).

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #21 on: August 06, 2006, 07:43:14 pm »
I wasn't referring that the Home Test is not reliable, it is. It's like JK stated, you don't get the one on one clinicians help. I'm for anyone that gets a test to be able to talk with someone and talk about your results.

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #22 on: August 07, 2006, 04:44:00 pm »
I know what your gonna say...

I had no risk...

But guys I have never felt this bad in my life, I have been crying all day.

MY LYMPH NODES ARE STILL SWOLLEN (neck&groin).  They have been swollen since about the 3rd week after exposure.
THE TRUSH IS GETTING WORSE. 
I have had EVERY symptom come guys and the ones that typically stay around stayed and the ones that leave, left.
I know you say I had no risk but several other sites say the opposite. 

Truth is, Semen may have gotten into my urethra, semen containing the virus... this may have infected me. 

I have never had any problems like this until now with thrush, the nodes, the ulcers, the mild joint pains, no diarhea but very watery stools, everything!

If I had the money I would test today, but I dont so I will wait, Im just losing it and I'm scared I could have been the 1st infected this way, somebody has to be 1st afterall...
« Last Edit: August 07, 2006, 05:24:05 pm by SoScared »

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #23 on: August 07, 2006, 06:20:01 pm »
An HIV test can be had at a local health clinic or testing facility, often on a sliding scale according to your ability to pay.

However, you had no risk. I am sorry you are experiencing great anxiety. I submit that this might be because of the gender of the person you experienced mutual masturbation with, and not because of any rational HIV situation.

 Seriously, would HIV educators worldwide RECOMMEND mutual masturbation to people if it was unsafe?

Thing is, you are diagnosing yourself with all sorts of stuff. And, I imagine, poking at those lymph nodes until they swell. It is most likely that you are CAUSING the very symptoms that you are freaking out over.

But whatever IS going on (did you investigate the student health clinic in your university like ANN suggested?) it's not going to be HIV. It's just not.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #24 on: August 07, 2006, 06:33:07 pm »
Thank you for being so kind and understanding with me.

No, I'm not poking at my nodes, It's like I just feel one get this tingly, itchy feeling and I touch in that area, and its a swollen lymph node!  They have been swollen for like 5-6 weeks now.  And the thrush is increasing, I've been eating lots of yogurt to try to get it to go away but it wont.. Also, I am sneezing like 4-5  times per day...

I havent went to th student health clinic yet because I am currently at home with my parents for a few weeks for the summer...

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #25 on: August 07, 2006, 06:40:18 pm »
Have you been diagnosed with thrush? It's easy for doctors to misdiagnose if they don't take a scraping and test it. I was once diagnosed with thrush when, in fact, I had strep. All the yogurt in the world won't make strep go away. I ended up in the hospital with a raging fever and a throat nearly swollen shut. Strep sucks.

Thrush is NOT something you can diagnose on your own. Even doctors and nurses often misdiagnose it by sight. ONLY getting a scraping and examining it under a scope can accurately determine thrush.

And even then, as has been pointed out, people with perfectly intact HIV negative immune systems get thrush... especially in periods of stress. And from everything I've read, well, you are certainly there.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #26 on: August 07, 2006, 06:58:30 pm »
THAT I AM!!

I really do read what you guys say and take it all into account, really I do. 
It makes me feel better, usually. 

It's just when you say that mutual masturbation isnt a risk, I totally understand how it isn't.  And I really dont see how it could be, usually.

It's just that my situation of mutual masturbaiton included semen gettign on the head of my penis, which usually wouldnt happen during mutual masturbation.  He was standing and i was sitting and some semen got on my penis head and I may have just rubbed it in or something....  Thats where the difference comes in.  Usually in mutual masturbation, the other persons semen wouldnt come in contact with your penis...

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #27 on: August 07, 2006, 07:01:52 pm »
So,

No matter how you slice this thing, it doesn't change the facts: HIV IS NOT TRANSMITTED BY MUTUAL MASTURBATION. Not in your case, nor anyone elses.

I agree with JK about the thrush. Have you been diagnosed?

MtD

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #28 on: August 07, 2006, 10:15:37 pm »
No I havent been diagnosed, but it's definately getting pretty bad.

The reason I havent is becasue Im @ home right now and I dont want my parents to know that somethings wrong because I would hate to go to the doctor w/ them or something and the doctor says its an std...

when i get back to college later on this month i will go to the doctor.  i just like the home access tests because I dont wanna go in and the doctor has to tell me I have something like HIV when I can find out myself and save a little pain...

I really have to go though because these nodes are steadily popping up and theres one in my neck that literally feels like an egg - looks lik eone too.  the others are just big.  Its so bad that other people have noticed them.  that scares me.

-sometimes i read some other peoples posts and i hope that im not being as illogical as some, i just hope you guys understand where im coming from as in this instance semen did get on my penis head and therefore I think I may have had a little more risk than some of the others... in any case- i thank you for what u do for all of us everyday.  you keep me going.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #29 on: August 07, 2006, 10:42:12 pm »
We've told you over and over again you don't get HIV by mutual masterbation. It doesn't matter if you had some semen on your penis or not. Now if you want to test go ahead and test and collect you negative result.

Offline hoyoyo

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #30 on: August 07, 2006, 11:56:44 pm »
So scared i know how you feel. but relax ( i am struggling with my own too). you gotta listen to rapidrod, ann, jk, and mtd, they know what are they talking about. if you are worry, dont hesitate to go to doctor. Go to the nearby std clinic, talk to them. they will help you. Seriously, get a test to ease your mind.

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #31 on: September 08, 2006, 02:50:02 am »
Hello everyone.  I'm back.

I was involved in a "no risk" situation according to the guys on here a while ago, however, I experience EVER ONE of the symptoms of HIV and EXACTLY on time.

I tested with Home Access at 5 weeks and the result was negative. 

However, at the time I tested I was still experiencing the symptoms very heavily and had been experiencing them for about a week and a half at that point. 

I was just wondering...

Are antibodies usually present in the blood stream when ARS symptoms are present?  I have read both yes and no, I just wanted a reliable answer. 

Thanks for all you do and God Bless!

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #32 on: September 08, 2006, 02:59:27 am »
Scared,

Thank you for returning to your regularly scheduled thread.

I've no doubt that you've been told this before, but we can go over it again. The "symptoms" of acute HIV infection are not specific to HIV. Many viral infections can cause a rash and "flu-like illness." Heck, even influenza can do it. Since these symptoms are not unique to HIV infection, we don't rely on them to diagnose the illness, nor as basis for testing.

Ya getting the idea yet?

The issue with HIV is not symptoms. It's risk behaviours. Things like unprotected anal and/or vaginal sex intercourse or sharing contaminated injecting equipment are risk behaviours. If you've done one or more of these things you need to get an HIV test 12-13 weeks from the date of the incident.

Now, whether you like it or not, that's the answer you need. Whether or not anti-bodies show up during ARS is not relevant to you because YOU DON'T HAVE ACUTE RETROVIRAL SYNDROME.

You are understanding me now, aren't you? I don't want to have to go through this again.

I'll close, my nervous friend, by pleading with you to read our Welcome Thread and the answers already given to you in this thread.

MtD

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #33 on: September 19, 2006, 01:57:16 am »
if u even care to listen...

I know you have told me time and time again that HIV isnt a worry in my case, but guys, I am scared... again.

My lymph nodes have not gone down since the forth week after exposure and they really irritate me. 
Also a few days ago I started to develop like three raised bumps on my skin.  They are kind of like ant bits but bigger and harder and they wont go down.  And I know they arent ant bites... theyre on all different parts of my body. 

Also, the oral thrush is spreading throughout my mouth.  Its now on the other side of my mouth... 

Its all these symptoms that really have me scared, but the lymph nodes especially..

I know you say that I wasnt at risk but trith is that infected semen could have gotten inside of my penis head and even though you say its no risk, who has ever tested it to see is what i wanna know. 

Im scared guys.  I just need some help.  In a few days I will go and get another test...

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #34 on: September 19, 2006, 06:33:31 am »
So,

If you'd stop feeling your nodes all the time to check if they're swollen, they might have a chance to go back to normal. Keep your hands off you nodes. Touching them all the time will make them swell and keep them swollen.

You didn't have a risk, period, end of story. Test if you must, but don't be surprised at the negative result.

If you're worried about your tongue, see a doctor.

There's nothing more we can do for you here.

Ann
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HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #35 on: September 19, 2006, 07:38:40 am »
Thanks Ann for the quick response.  The scarry thing is that I dont touch my ndoes at all!  They just start to fell really funny and they pop up!  Actually, I didnt even know I had them in my groin and leg until they started popping up and stinging. 

I know there isnt too much that you all can do any more, I guess im just here for comfort until I get my results... Its just wierd to me on how this couldnt be a risk, Im just wondering, how has that been proved.. at any rate, thank you all ofr your continued support at this hard time in my life.  I appreciate u all.

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #36 on: September 20, 2006, 01:02:36 am »
OH MY GOSH GUYS!!!

I HAVE A BIG DARK PURPLISH BROWN SPOT ON THE INSIDE OF MY MOUTH!!!

I am freaked out beyond measure now, I cant stop shaking and crying.  I am so scared to go to walgreens and get the test but I think thats what I have to do.  The lymph nodes are still giving me problems, the white spots are still on the inside of my mouth and now this!!  This can not be good.

Offline midvale

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #37 on: September 20, 2006, 01:23:20 am »
As someone who has experienced many oral symptoms before, red purpulish dot inside your mouth can be as simple as biting on it while you are asleep (it may be a tiny bite)-caused by stress and anxiety- it could also be a million other things...why do you rule out hundreds of other explenations and focus just on HIV? (No one can diagnose your oral symptoms on line).

  Please take the experts words for what they are....you are chasing something that is eating away at the moments of your life.....I had a ton of oral sympotsm! NONE of them had anything to do with HIV....stop for a second, breathe and think about this....would all these people lie to you about your risk? think about how many mutual masturbations take place....now don't you think millions more would have been infected or at least one case reported? come on....trun off the computer....step away.....open the door and go for a walk...trust me you are wasting time that is never ever ever ever comming back! 

Please seek the help of your dentist or dr. regarding oral issues....i would trust the experts 10000% on this.

peace to you.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #38 on: September 20, 2006, 05:56:28 am »
Scared,

I'll say it again - whatever is going on has nothing to do with hiv - you didn't have a risk in the situation you brought to us. As long as you haven't engaged in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse or shared drug injecting equipment with anyone, you are more likely to fly to the moon tomorrow morning than you are to test positive for hiv. Seriously.

The prudent thing to do would be to see your doctor about your symptoms. There ARE other illnesses in the world besides hiv you know, and you could be missing something important through your blind insistence that it has to be hiv. It couldn't be hiv. You had no risk.

If you really need that hiv antibody test to prove to yourself that you had no risk, you don't have to do the mail order one and end up having to wait for ages for your result. Go to HIV testing center database and find the center nearest you where you can get a twenty minute rapid test.

But no matter where you test or what test you use, if this mutual masturbation thing is the only thing you've done and there's been no unprotected intercourse, you will test negative.

Use condoms for intercourse and avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

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HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #39 on: October 05, 2006, 02:46:12 am »
cant shake it guys... will go this weekend to get a new kit to test again.

before i do i just have a few questions/comments.

1.  My mouth is going crazy.  The trhush is getting worse and the mouth ulcers stay forever, now I have a huge ulcer on my tounge and on the side of my tounge ridges have appeared. 

2.  From time to time I get muscle aches and for the past 4 or 5 days my right arm has been really sore which is odd and I have not done any heavy lifting or anything like that.  I also have a small paper cut on my right hand which has been there for about 5 or 6 days that wont heal, which is also odd.

3.  I was just wondering.... Percentage wise, how accurate is a 5 week test? 

4.  The onset of the symptoms in the time period that they came and how they left is what really scares me.  What other reason could all my lymph nodes swell and i get all these symptoms...

As you can see, im still scared...

sorry.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #40 on: October 05, 2006, 02:50:08 am »
For you a five week test would be conclusive considering you didn't have a risk. If you want to know what else can cause lymph node swelling contact your doctor. Keep your fingers off of them in the mean time.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #41 on: October 05, 2006, 06:25:25 am »
So,

1, this is nothing to do with hiv. Go see your doctor.

2, this is nothing to do with hiv. Go see your doctor.

3, when there has been no risk, as in your situation, a five week test is 100% conclusive.

4, there are hundreds if not thousands of reasons why your lymph glands could swell. Touching them all the time is one of them, so keep your hands off. Get to your doctor and find out what is really going on. You could be missing something important through your misguided assumptions that you have had an hiv risk. You haven't. Whatever is going on has nothing to do with hiv.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #42 on: October 20, 2006, 05:13:05 am »
As you can see from the dates of my postings, I am getting better with this whole fear thing but I was just wondering if you guys are 110% sure that there is ZERO percent chance that you can get infected from the situation I described. 

I was just thinking if you could get HIV through sharing needles, how could you say that it can't live outside of the body? 

I am still experiencing lymph node problems, severely.  Now the one that just popped up is one under my jaw and it's pretty big and kinda painful.  I didn't even know I had a lymph node there!  Also my throat was sore during the possible ars period, and now it gets very sore to the touch at least like every week, although it doesn't really feel sore when I swollow.  The neck nodes are still giving me problems and the groin ones, though they don't tingle or anything anymore, are still huge.  I have had every single symptom and I think I may be a fool if I totally ignore the signs... 

I know you guys say that there isn't any reported cases of HIV through what I described, but HIV infected semen may have got on the tip of my penis guys and went in and I know all it takes is a drop to get infected.  Has there been studies to ensure that something like this can't happen or are you guys just saying it can't happen because usually people who get semen on their penis or inside of them are people who have unprotected sex, so it hasn't really been documented that someone who got HIV infected semen inside of them without having sex to contract the disease. 


Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #43 on: October 20, 2006, 07:09:26 am »
So,

When hiv is transmitted through needle use, it is because hiv infected blood has remained INSIDE the syringe and that syringe has been used IMMEDIATELY by another person.

You did NOT have a risk of hiv infection. If you insist on continuing to post about this, you will be given a time out to encourage you to get the face-to-face medical help and counseling you need. In fact, why don't you just get your conclusive hiv test, collect your negative result and move on with your life?

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #44 on: October 20, 2006, 09:21:23 am »
thanks ann.  honestly, I desperately want to test and move on, but in all sincerity every time I get ready to do it, I get too scared becasue of the fear that it just may come back positive, so even though a part of me really wants a difinitive answer, the other part of me says, if you have it you have it and if you dont you dont, so just dont get tested and dont have sex.... i know it's crazy but that's just how i've been feeling lately.

Offline riskybusiness

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #45 on: April 02, 2007, 12:07:57 am »
About 7 months ago I masturbated with a man in a theatre peep.  This wouldn't be considered risky, he put pre-cum on my penis head and all around (possibly in) the urethra as soon as it came out of him. 

About 3 weeks later I got ALL of the symptoms of ARS including the lymph nodes all over, flu like symptoms, purple blotches in my mouth, diarrhea, and every other symptom there is. 

I tested with a first generation test at like 4 1/2 weeks and it was negative. 

I haven't tested since because I am just too scared too but I have been sick an aweful lot since then and I am someone who NEVER gets sick.  Now it seems as if Im ALWAYS sick and I can never get enough sleep!

I think about it everyday but I have been thinking about it the past week more than ever.  Every morning I wake up my throat is sore and I cough up flim and I have had a full body muscle ache for about 5 days now and its really severe.

I just have a few questions -
1.  Could I get infected from semen going directly into my urethra from someone elses urethra?
2.  Does HIV show up in the blood before or during ARS or does ARS have to be over?

Please help me!  I am going crazzzy!!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #46 on: April 02, 2007, 04:27:37 am »
Read the lesson section. You can find the links in the "Welcome" thread. You were not at risk.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #47 on: April 02, 2007, 05:20:27 am »
riskybusiness,

Can I ask why you are using different usernames while posting to our forums? Thus far, you have also used SoScared

Please realize that this kind of activity is disrespectful of other forum members, as well as our moderators. People spend a considerable amount of time helping others in these forums. Using multiple accounts is at the very least annoying, if not deceiving and disrespectful of others. It is also against our Terms of Membership which you agreed to when you became a member. This information is also contained within the Welcome Thread, which you should have read by now. So really, you have no excuse.

You must realize that the answers won't change, no matter how many names you post under.

I would appreciate a reply to this message, and I hope you will commit to using just one account - preferably your original one. If not, you will be banned from further access to the forums.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline riskybusiness

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #48 on: April 02, 2007, 09:08:04 am »
I am really sorry about that Ann - I honestly forgot my old username and password because I hadn't been here in so long.  I thought my old topics were long forgotten and prob. gone thats why I made a new one.  Im sorry about that though.  I just needed a little help

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #49 on: April 02, 2007, 06:50:24 pm »
risky,

As you have forgotten your password, I'll allow you to continue with your new account. However, if you create a third one, you WILL be banned. Keep your new account details safe for future use.

I've merged your old thread with your new thread - because it's obviously the same incident that is bothering you. Re-read ALL your replies, because the answers are NOT going to change.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #50 on: June 04, 2007, 04:18:57 am »
Just wanted to say thanks to everyone for their help on this site, however, I am still scared.

A few nights ago - I woke up and my bed was soaking wet from night sweats.
Lymph nodes still pop up and go down
i have had a few cases of diarhea
i get sick VERY easily and i was always someone who never got sick
the thrush is still there

I tested at the 5 week mark and i was negative and all after that I was either too scared to too broke to re test.  Now I dont think I have a choice.  These symptoms are driving me crazy.  I just want to know - how accurate is a five week negative with home access (i hear its 1st gen)  and does hiv show up during ars - becuase i was still heavily feeling symptoms during the time i tested. 

Thanks for your help!  This site is a lifesaver, really. it is.
 

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #51 on: June 04, 2007, 06:41:26 am »
So,

You have not had a risk of hiv infection, so whatever is going on with you has nothing to do with hiv.

Successfull hiv infection occurs INSIDE the human body, as in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. What you describe happened OUTSIDE the body and is called frottage (rubbing genitals together) and mutual masturbation. Neither of these are hiv transmission risks.

You need to get to your doctor about your symptoms to find out the real cause and that real cause won't be hiv. You didn't have a risk.

Ann


As I've said to you before, our answers are NOT going to change. You had NO RISK.

No risk + five week negative = conclusively negative. You do NOT have hiv.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #52 on: October 31, 2007, 12:26:57 pm »
I have a few questions about HIV

1.  I have had ALL of the symptoms and they all came within 3-5 weeks after exposure and stayed a while, including purplish spots in my mouth, mouth ulcers, swollen nodes, fever, and diarrhea.  However, my only risk was that someones semen was rubbed on the opening of my penis during mutual masturbation.  Some say its no risk, but to me its just odd that I got all the symptoms and I had someones semen get into my penis which has to pose some type of risk.  If not HIV what can this be?

2.  How accurate is a 5 week Home Access test.  I was told that these test take a little longer to pick up the virus becuas eits fisrt generation.  Is that true? 

3.  Since my exposure, I have been getting sick an aweful lot.  If anyone even coughs around me, I'm instantly sick and now I can't get over this cold or whatever I have that I've had for like 2 weeks now.  The scary part is that I NEVER got sick befor the exposure.  Never.  I might have gotten sick once a year, but that was nothing more than a little common cold, now I'm ALWAYS sick and i'm scared that its because my immune system is breaking down.  Can this be? 

Please help me to ease my mind.  I am sooooo scared it doesn't even make any sense.  This consumes my mind, it seems like everywhere I go I see HIV/ aids signs, posters, and such.  I just don't kno wwhat to do...

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #53 on: October 31, 2007, 01:20:52 pm »
No matter what details you throw into the mix, mutual masturbation is not a risk for HIV transmission. Period.

And no, it isn't "odd" that you have various symptoms that are bothering you close in time to this incident. It's coincidental is what it is. There is absolutely nothing that you have described that is in any way HIV specific. But then you also need to know that if you had a real risk for transmission, which hopefully you never will, neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status.

Only an HIV test at 13 weeks can give you a definitive answer. In your case testing is not necessary because there was no risk.  If your symptoms persist that's something to discuss with your doctor. This is NOT an HIV situation. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #54 on: October 31, 2007, 03:37:33 pm »
I fully understand what you are saying, but this is just so wiered to me. 

So are you saying without a shadow of a doubt that if I am muutually masturbating and someone takes their fresh semen and rubs it in on my penis that that is NO risk?  not even slightly?

I would also like to know the reliability of a 5 week negative in percentage using a HOme Access test.  Just curious...

Thanks a lot for all your help!  ;)

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #55 on: October 31, 2007, 03:39:53 pm »
Please keep all your additional thoughts, questions and comments in your original thread. This helps us to follow your story and give you the most accurate advice.

If you can't find you original thread click on the red link I've provided above. Alternatively you can click on the "show own posts" link in the left hand column of any forums page.

You will not receive any further answers to your questions until you return to your original thread.

MtD



Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #56 on: October 31, 2007, 03:54:56 pm »
I hadn't noticed that you have a previous thread. I've now merged them. Please keep all of your entries in this same thread. Don't start any more new threads. Thanks for your cooperation.
Andy Velez

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #57 on: December 25, 2007, 01:27:21 am »
WOW.

I really thought I would be over this by now....

However, the white bumps in my mouth has STILL not went down and they are getting progressively worse.

I have not had sex since that day and now I have two genital warts or something which I just read is indicative of the onset of AIDS, I've also been very fatigued lately. 

Im shaking right now typing this.... I'm so scared guys....

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #58 on: December 25, 2007, 05:05:30 am »
Maybe this will help you move forward.

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #59 on: December 25, 2007, 06:56:44 am »
So,

You didn't have a risk for hiv infection. We've told you that repeatedly. Show the bumps on your penis to a doctor - we cannot diagnose you here. If it would make you feel better, have an hiv test while you're at it - the result will once again be negative.

This forum is not the appropriate place for you to work through your feelings of anxiety. Find yourself a therapist who can teach you ways of coping. We cannot do that for you here.

If you come back with more symptoms and whatiffs, you will be given a time out (see the posting guideline Rodney posted above). Go see your doctor instead of posting on the internet. There's nothing more we can do for you here.

Please consider yourself warned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #60 on: March 04, 2008, 08:15:16 pm »
OK, pretty much sure I have something.  3 weeks after having a mutual masturbation session with an unknown guy, I had EVERY SYMPTOM of HIV including the long period of diarrhea, night sweats, fllu symptoms. the purple bothes in mouth, still have thrush, still have an enlarged lymph node (though I had MANY others enlarged), and NOW I have these little patches appearing on my penis. 

This is about 1 1/2 after the initial incident so I am scared that I may have HIV and it is progressing.  If now.... WHAT!?!?!  Im so scared....

Offline JustDontKnow

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #61 on: March 04, 2008, 08:44:58 pm »
I wouldn't worry man...i had every single symptom in the book and I mean everyone!!! including peripheral neuropathy diagnosed by a neurologist exactly 3 weeks after making out with 2 girls in vegas...one of which was a stripper. I had to go to the hospital - it was the worst illness I've ever had in my life...104 degree fever, sore throat, white patches on my tonsils...I couldn't even breath. The doctor at the ER asked me if i was gay, injection drug user, or may have been expose to HIV recently. Scared the living sh*t out of me!!! I was convinced I caught HIV from making out. I tested negative for all the more common illnesses like mono, flu, strep, etc. I was convinced...what else could it possibly be you know? It had to be HIV. I was the unlucky one to get HIV from making out. Well guess what...I was wrong. I tested negative at 3 months. I tested 8 times over a 3 month period - not a single positive!!! I still didn't believe the results and figured something happened with the tests or I just didn't develop antibodies yet because what I had was ARS to the T and I just couldn't get it out of the back of my head that I was the 1% that would seroconvert late. Well, guess what - wrong again. I tested negative yet again today...13 months later. So, you can think you have HIV all you want...your brain will continue to tell you that all day and all night long. The truth is - even though it's still hard for me to believe it - HIV is an EXTREMELY hard virus to catch. That's not saying you can mess around and not practice safe sex but it just doesn't happen for the low type of exposures that you and I both describe. So, I know you're reading this and it makes you feel a little better...within the next couple of days your brain is gonna tell you have it again and you're gonna go through this over and over again until you can come to a realization that you don't have it...and you're gonna think that you are the "special one" but in reality you're just not gonna test positive - plain and simple. I'm no expert in HIV...but I spent the last year learning everything I could about it because I SELF DIAGNOSED myself HIV positive...please don't do it to yourself. It's up to you...believe that you are negative when you get that negative test. Trust the tests!!!

Good luck.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #62 on: March 04, 2008, 09:28:50 pm »
Just, I know you meant well with your response, but only those who are authorized by the site are to reply to questions here. Thanks for your cooperation.
Andy Velez

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #63 on: March 04, 2008, 09:33:01 pm »
SO, you may have "something," but it absolutely is not HIV in relation to this masturbatory incident you are concerned about. HIV is transmitted in very limited ways sexually, and not matter what spin you try to put on the details, mutual masturbation is not a risk. Period.

Read our lesson on transmission if you haven't already done so. You get all the basics there. There's a link to it in the welcome thread which opens this section.

As far as your symptoms are concerned that is something to discuss with your doctor and not with your head, which is clearly mistakenly stuck on HIV. There is no need for HIV testing because you didn't have a risk. Good luck with finding the real cause. 

 
Andy Velez

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #64 on: March 04, 2008, 11:38:39 pm »
Thank you so much Andy and JustDontKNow, I really got a piece of mind from reading your messages.  I am just so scared about having HIV its not funny and you guys gave me some great answers.  Now if I can just find out what I DO have because these patches (like white kinda ruff) patches keep popping up on my penis and theres just symptoms like the lymph nodes and thrush that wont leave!  I'm going to get to the bottom of this though, I know I can.

Offline Ann

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #65 on: March 05, 2008, 03:38:57 am »
So,


I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

You were warned the last time you were here that you'd be given a time out if you came back with this stuff again. That warning still stands and I'm giving you that time out.

You didn't have a risk. You've been repeatedly told that and you've also been repeatedly told to take your penis to your doctor. We cannot diagnose you here. We CAN tell you, however, that you were not at risk for hiv infection.

Do not attempt to create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann

Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline SoScared

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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #66 on: July 20, 2008, 12:06:05 am »
I was wondering if when testing, should the test be negative or positive if you are experiencing symptoms of ARS?  I tested negative at 5 weeks but that was also about the peak of my experience with feeling ARS.  AT the time of my testing I had the swollen nodes, all over in cluding under armpit, under jaw, in leg, neck, and groin - i also had the soft stools, the fever, flu symptoms, the purplish spots in my moith, 3 mouth ulcers,, 2 or 3 cases of severe night sweats where my sheets were DRENCHED. 

I have been meaning to get tested since then, however I am too scared to know my status at this point.  Now I am getting itchy rashes all over my body, constant nausia, I have recently had white dry spots to arise and dissapear on my penis, mouth ulcers to come and go, and hundreds of tiny white bumps in my mouth that wont go away. 

I am worried that I may have HIV and it is progressing.... I am really worried.

My two main questions are
1.  Would I test positive if I was feeling ARS symptoms   - and -
2.  I tested with an Home ACcess kit, I hear that thats 1st generation so it wouldnt detect the virus as fast.  Would a first gen. test detect the virus if ARS is present/ 

THanks everyone for all your help.   

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
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Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #67 on: July 20, 2008, 06:32:40 am »
So,

How many times do you have to be told that you didn't have a risk?

If you're so worried about hiv, go test and collect your inevitable negative result.

Don't bother coming back with more whatiffs or what ever. You'll be timed out quicker than you can say "negative".

And that's a promise.

You don't have hiv. Take your woes to a doctor so you can find out what really IS going on. Whatever it is, it is NOT hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Ann

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  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I am really scared!!
« Reply #68 on: July 29, 2008, 04:06:05 pm »
So,

As you decided to attempt to create a new account (shinpai) despite being warned not to in the past, I'm banning you. Permanently.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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