POZ Community Forums
HIV Prevention and Testing => Do I Have HIV? => Topic started by: worriedsam on May 02, 2007, 02:54:06 pm
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Hey People out here,
Firstly, I must congratulate everyone for the great support you provide to a lot of distressed people. That takes courage and strength.
I have been worried/concerned/anxious for the past month or so about 2 incidents I have had. I need clarification on these.
1) I had a tantra session with a professional tantra teacher where we in the bath tub together naked. She rubbed my penis (using soap as a lubricant), but, I dint recall touching her genitalia. She has a degree in Public Health and told me that soap is a disinfectant and she did not touch me anywhere else. I ejaculated and she wiped off with a towel. Now, if I was in the tub with her naked, is there a chance for the virus from her vaginal fluids make it to some minuscule cut on my body and infect me? She did not have any cuts (that I could see in her hand) and is her touching and stroking my genitals safe?
2) I had another tantra session with a different teacher and she did not get into the tub with me and just poured water on me with salts. She then gave me a massage and asked me also to give her back a rub. Again, I did not see any obvious cuts on her and dint remember myself having any cuts on myself except for maybe some dry skin (due to the weather). She then stroked my genitals using gloves and oil. Was I safe from both the experiences?
I have been anxious about this. I dint really recall getting sick (except for feeling occasional pain under arms and in the groin) and some neck pain (for a month now).
The incidents were 8 and 5 weeks ago.
Please advice me.
Thanks,
Sam
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please respond even if this sounds ridiculous...
I need someone who understands the risks to respond...
please
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You masturbated. There is no risk in doing that alone or with someone else doing it for you.
Read the lessons on transmission in the Welcome Thread, so you know how this disease actually works.
Nothing you did put you at a risk for HIV. No way no how.
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Thanks for helping me put my mind at ease. I am constantly looking for symptoms and driving myself crazy.
If you did think otherwise from what I experienced, please let me know, but, I feel better already.
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No problem Glad we can help.
You really did NOT have any type of risk what so ever.
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I tell myself that it is not possible for me to be infected with the exposure I had but, maybe its the guilt (I am married) of the in-discretion or just anxiousness I am not sure, I have been driving myself crazy.
I get very depressed thinking of this and to be honest, it is shameful of me to do that considering there are people who are infected who are leading such positive lives. But, when the mind plays tricks or guilt sets in, makes it worse.
I hope this will be a big learn for me...its just worth putting myself through such horror. Be safe...always
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Well yes, be safer always is the way to go.
As you've already been told, there was absolutely no risk whatsoever for HIV transmission during that incident, even IF the woman was HIV+.
Guilt is a whole separate matter. That does nothing good for anyone concerned, so the best think you can do is to take a good deep breath, accept that you're a dawg like the rest of us, let it go and get on with your life. Really.
Cheers,
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Thanks Andy for seconding the confident good words 'No Risk Whatsoever'...
I do not want to think of 'If's' and 'What If's' as that will drive me crazier.
In fact, I spoke to the 2 women and they seemed surprised that I was concerned...but, I did not ask their status...
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Well, you are actually responsible for your own health. They would have been within their rights to tell you to sod off when asked about their status.
Fortunately in this case you weren't at risk. Their responses are uhmm reassuring, but remember always to be safer in what you do. Then the HIV status of the person you are with is of interest but even if positive you're protected.
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Isn't it funny how strong the mind is? We take life and our circumstances for granted so much that we don't even realize how one or two little incidents can take the life we have worked so hard for away. Please be FAITHFUL to your wife. No reason putting her at risk for your foolish mistakes. I'm sure that you've learned from this experience, and appreciate what you have a little more now. By the way, you have the smooth moves with these Tantra teachers, or do are the quite friendly to all of their students??
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yes Andy...
i now realize that how close I have been to making a mess of things...and how lucky (I hope as you hav reassured) I have been...
well, the teachers are very well-versed and very nice...one needs to be careful of one's health and take precautions...
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I maybe trying to bring a mute topic back to the fore, but, how does tranmission occur or not...?
I am no doc, but, truly understanding this is important...
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Please go to the "Welcome" thread and click the link on transmission.
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I was telling my friend about my post here and the clarification that I got from experts here...
he then said...check your lymph nodes near the groin and under arm and neck and see if they are swelling...he said, people dont know even if they have caught hiv...
I probably ended up pressing my groin area and it is paining a little and i can feel things when i press...now, that he has made me worried again, i started looking and found Dr.H in medhelp.org say that hiv does not cause the lymph nodes in the groin to swell and even if it does, one will be able to feel easily...
maybe, too much for a non-doc like me...
i have been looking for pictures of swollen lymph nodes on the internet...
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Leave your nodes alone. You did NOT have a risk.
Even if the ladies WERE hiv+ you DID NOT HAVE A RISK.
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Thanks AC,
You are such a gem...
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How do people who moniter HIV know how it came by? Not everyone's experience can be absolutely accurate and people might lie...just how do people know how an individual got infected?
I am curious and would be glad to see some good responses...
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Without getting overly technical...
Because SCIENCE has PROVEN the ways that HIV is transmitted.
Which is why none of the advice we give is based off of what people SAY. Only what science has proven over 25 years.
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ok...
I suppose, for HIV virus to mutate, it needs a hospitable environment...and the urethra, vagina and the anus provide it with it and the tonsils to an extent...
thats why even an exposed cut elsewhere will not be a good place for a potential risk as the virus will need to travel far without getting potentially wiped out before it finds its first home...
That in a way provides science to conclude and asses individual transmission rate. Is that true/rubbish?
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Take the tonsils off your list and add sharing work and/or needles and you be correct.
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ofcourse, since sharing work/needles puts the virus infected blood directly into the host's blood stream (back door entry).
And freshly used needles/syringes with live blood contain virus still active and not inactivated (as when it gets exposed to environment)...
Very scary to be honest!!!
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Reading some of the posts in this section is absolutely scary...
never thought about things until I started reading some posts...
whats a rash and how does it look like? I have something similar on my arms...but, it has been 7 and 10 weeks since my incident...
how stupid can I get?
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Sam,
As you DID NOT HAVE A RISK, whatever is going on with your arms has nothing to do with hiv. If your arms worry you, see your doctor.
Ann
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Hello Everyone,
I am going for my HIV + STD test today (part of immigration and insurance requirements). Considering the experience I had in March (I know I have received confirmation from you guys), will everything turn out well for me today?
I have visited this site and read things periodically and one thing that makes me feel better is reading good assurances from you folk.
So, please let me know.
P.S: I am scared yet feel I will come trumps...
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You'll test negative.
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After the scare that I had 5 months ago, I ran into some more trouble recently.
I was with my swim coach practicing some deep dives and things turned a little crazy between us. During this process, she touched my penis and the also the top of it for a couple of seconds. We were inside the swimming pool during the whole process (I think it was chlorinated water). Am I at risk here? I did not touch her or kiss or anything like that...
Since the urethra is the most vulnerable part for transmission and since she touched it, am I at risk here?
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That's not a risk. Go to the "Welcome" follow the link to transmission and read it and educate yourself on how HIV is transmitted.
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Thanks Rapid...
I should never have let her touch me...I make these errors in judgement. My 3rd in 5 months and makes me sick...
SInce, you feel I am not at risk, I should not look for symptoms or things like that.
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Sam,
Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus that is primarily transmitted INSIDE the human body, as in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. It is NOT transmitted via someone simply touching your penis.
You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.
Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence. Use them correctly and consistently any time you have intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!
Ann
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Thanks Ann for helping me feel better...
I will keep in mind the fact that I should always use condoms for a sexual intercourse...
I now know that getting a massage is no risk. But, what if I had a scrape on my hand and the therapist used oil in her hands to massage that? Is that also a no risk...?
I am running into this crazy question because I got a massage done and after the massage realised that I have an old scrape on my hand from a fall a week or so ago...
I mean people have nicks that they dont see and if a massage is done with oil, is that a risk?
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sam,
Casual contact of any sort is not a risk. Forget about all these little cuts and scrapes and whatnot. Hiv is much to fragile to be transmitted in any of the ways you're thinking of, no matter what spin you can dream up to put on it.
Make sure condoms are being used for intercourse and you won't become infected.
Ann
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so, massage is ok? with or without cuts and/or scrapes?
I have been too scared of this HIV...I had a scare 5 months back and I got myself tested a couple of months back and now, I am concerned about someone touching my penis and the consequences of a massage.
Thank God for aidsmeds...else, I would have turned crazy for sure...
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Sam,
Massage is OK. So is getting a handjob. Hiv is absolutely NOT transmitted in these ways, no matter what details you add.
Just makes sure you use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you'll be fine where hiv is concerned. Don't forget to read through the condom and lube links in my signature line.
Ann
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Thanks Ann...
I don't think I should ask you about STD's...but, if you were to say something, are my scenarios STD free too...?
I did not have any genital touching during the massage but, my penis was touched during the swimming pool encounter.
I have had Syphlis and other STD's tested recently along with the HIV test...
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Sam,
No, you don't need to worry about STIs in this situation.
Ann
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Thanks Ann...you make me feel better everytime...
I have been mild burning at my penis tip...not sure if it is anything...no discharge or anything that I can notice...
I suppose I should take is a physiological thing rather than worry that I may have contracted an sti...moreso, since you have re-assured me.
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Guys
I have mailed before on this site and thats to you folk, I feel at peace...
but, today I have created one more scare in my mind.
I had a burn on my hand this morning and it has resulted in 2 open wounds on my right hand.
This evening, I went for a massage and explicitely told the massuer that I have a cut on my hand and that she should not massage my hand. I am not sure if she has not touched my hand inadvertantly. Is it safe?
and if I have a pimple on the body and if the massuer touches it with her hands, is that also safe?
Please tell me soon as it has only 1 hr since the incident happened...
Thanks so much guys
Really worried sam...
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You've been here before then you should know the posting guidelines. Please post in your original thread.
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Rapid,
I am sorry for this, but, I was told to post in a new message..
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I have merged your threads, please keep everything in this thread from now on..I don't know who told you to start a new one but I doubt it was anyone here.
This is not an HIV risk, you should know this already because you have been told, please take the time to read the Welcome Thread (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=220.0) and follow the lessons on how HIV is and is not transmitted.
Jan
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I got very paranoid as I had a deep cut on my hand and though I had mentioned to her not to massage or touch me there, I was not sure if she did touch in-advertantly and also with a pimple on my body, I really got panicked.
Thanks for the re-assurance Annie.
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Once again this is a no risk situation for HIV transmission. If you simply re-read what's been said to you previously instead of just indulging in your fearful fantasies you would know that. You've been told that the real risk for HIV is unprotected vaginal or anal intercourse.
All of the other stuff is either no risk or only theoretically risky. Get with the program and start thinking instead of worrying.
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Guys,
I am back with a new worry...
this evening, I had a massage with a woman who has/had lymphoma (she said she had it removed and was cancerous or maybe not). She stroked me to ejaculation and I have been worried since then if I need to get more than worried...
I did not do anything with her other than she stroke me to ejaculation.
It would be awesome if someone can please tell me if I need to be concerned...
Thanks,
Sam
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Sam,
Of course this wasn't a risk and you've been coming here long enough to know that by now. We're not here to hold your hand every time you get wanked off.
Ann
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ANn,
I understand that and I appreciate the fact that you respond back to me whenever I perceive myself in trouble.
So, is the fact that she has/had lymphoma not a worry?
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No. the fact that she has/had lymphoma is not a worry to you at all.
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Sam,
Why on earth should it? Lymphoma does not equal hiv and you can't "catch" cancer from another person during a massage. Just like you cannot be infected with hiv during a massage.
Keep going on about this and you'll be timed out. I mean, really, use your head!
Ann
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Ann,
Please dont time me out...I apologise if I am being stupid and dumb...
I dont intend to hurt anyone here...
I was just worried and I trust you guys as much as anything out there.
Again, I apologise...
Sam
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Ann, Rapid, Jk, Andy and others,
I have a question to ask you folk...
A week ago, in flight, the guy behind my row suddenly threw up and in the process a fair amount fell on the guy next to me. I initially observed nothing had landed on me, but as I got up to head to the rest room, i placed my hand on one of the seats and i realised that his vomit had even landed there. I immediately went to the restroom and washed off. I asked the air hostess if it is alright, she said...you are fine.
It has been bothering me and considering that I am always worried, is this a valid worry for hiv/std?
Please tell me and please do not time me out...
Sam
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Sam,
GROW UP!!! You've been coming here for over a year and a half and yet you come back to ask - with a straight face, no doubt - if VOMIT is a risk for hiv or other STIs? Give it a rest. Why don't you just go live in a bubble somewhere.
Don't even bother coming back with one response. It's time out time if you do.
Ann