Could i have HIV and not know it.

[Blancaster2001]

Hi, i will try and keep this short but also not leave anything out. Four years ago i had sex with a few transexuals - over a period of a few months when in europe. In all cases i wore a condom but once gave oral without but she didn't cum. In hindsight when i look back after one time, roughly ten weeks i got a flu like illness, with a very sore throat - extreme sore throat lasting 3 days, i also had a very bad headache for 6 days. At the end of this i felt a fever break, i hadnt felt i had a fever but i woke shaking and when thus passed so did the headache and sore throat. At this time i was in Asia and had been in some badly sir conditined (old equipment) hotel rooms so presumed i had picked it up that way or on a  long flight. Over the next months i had dry mouth, stiff neck at times, small red spots appearring for a few days on lower legs, feet etc. I had never thought on HIV at the time but now im not so sure. I get very tired at times, strange (not painful tingling sensations in feet, lower legs and sometime hands) have managed to convince myself i have swollen lymph node but i cant be sure. I also at times have a redness on my chest or neck (not for long) and have a red patch, flat, not raised or itchy on my neck which is almost invisable at times and other times noticeable. Although i used condoms on all occassions, once i noticed blood on it after - no sign of a tear or breakage but i was drunk and worry i didnt notice. Does any (i know these are vague symptoms) suggest HIV like symptoms - would i even have on/off symptoms over a four year period. Any advice would be great.

[Andy Velez]

Lancaster, I've moved your thread here where it belongs with others who are asking questions about their HIV status. Please use only this thread for any comments in the future.

HIV risk is not about whom you are with. It's about what you do with the other person sexually. As long as you used a condom everytime for intercourse then you were well protected. The only confirmed risks for HIV sexually are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse.

Nothing else of your activities would have put you at risk for HIV. If you are still having symptoms that are bothering you, discuss them with your doctor. They have nothing to do with HIV and there is no need for HIV testing.

[Blancaster2001]

Thanks for the reply Andy - i appreciate it. I had realised i had posted in the wrong place shortly after but as new to the site i had a few problems in navigating my way round. I realise i probably am being anxious and in the last while i have almost decided i have HIV without any proof. It's kinda came to a head recently as i'm getting involved with a girl and a bit concerned due to that. Iv never had unprotected sex of any kind but for some reason my all-pervasive fear of it being HIV means i may be ignoring something else - like diabetes or something. Im terrified to get tested but i feel i may have to to put my mind at rest.

[Andy Velez]

You can get tested for HIV if you need the inevitable negative result to put your mind at ease.

As for having unprotected sex, the only time it is safe to do that is if and when you find yourself in a monogamous relationship to which both partners are committed and both partners test negative at a reliable point. Otherwise condoms are a must everytime for vaginal and anal intercourse. No exceptions. 

[Ann]

Blancaster,

I agree with Andy that you do not need to test specifically over protected intercourse.

However, as a sexually active adult, you should be having a full sexual health check up at least once a year. Think of it like going to the dentist for regular check ups. You may not have a toothache, but you go anyway. It's what responsible adults do to proactively protect their health.

Condoms have been proven to prevent hiv infection. There have been three long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

It sounds like you've never had a sexual health check up - so by all means, go have one done. You should also see a doctor about the health problems you're experiencing - while hiv isn't going to be the cause, you could be missing something important by your misguided focus on hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann

[Blancaster2001]

Cheers Ann - You are very right. We should all be checked regularly. I haven't been but i have always been careful. Scary thing is none of my friends have either and i'm sure they aren't al so careful. I do have a habit of ignoring things and in the past i was always so healthy and never experiencing aches and pains, i almost have a refusal to believe thatas im not in my 20s anymore more health issues can come up. Some of my symptoms may even be caused by anxiety i suppose. I hadn't thought of HIV until strating to read online and to se how common anxiety in this area is. I will get the check up anyway, to be sure and to check for anything else.