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Author Topic: EMERGENCY PEP  (Read 21084 times)

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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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EMERGENCY PEP
« on: April 23, 2018, 05:45:35 pm »
Hi

Iam a bisexual man and had a hiv test in may 2017 which was clear. Since then I have had topped with a transvestite in amsterdam using a condom. On 2 other occasions I have tried to bottom but as I have a low pain treshold ive only managed to take a penis for a matte of seconds, both times protected with no ejeculation. Ive given and recieved blowjobs a number of times unprotected but never take ejeculate in my mouth.

Where the problem starts I its I have a female friend whom I had vaginal sex with on 3 occasions early last week with no protection (with her no ejeculation) as she knows shes is std free (due to complications with childbirth 2 years ago and not had sex in 2 years since without protection).

I know in hindsight this was stupid to not use a condom. My concrn now is 6 days later I am having aching legs and arms with a sore throat.

Could my previous bisexual events have made me infected with hiv? With having sex with her 3 times what is the likelyhood of infectiom?

Offline CaveyUK

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #1 on: April 23, 2018, 07:01:39 pm »
Based on what you have posted specifically, your only risk was the unprotected vaginal sex with your female friend. Whilst the claim is that she hasn't had sex for 2 years and knows she is STD free, that is only anecdotal and it is up to you as to whether to believe that or not.

But that was your only risk event. The anal sex with men were protected so not a risk of HIV at all. The oral sex was negligible risk, but is not an event we encourage testing after as it is not an effective transmission route for the virus.

Symptoms are completely unreliable when it comes to HIV, with most people not experiencing any (or any that stand out as being something unusual). Generally these wouldn't start as quickly as 6 days and aching legs and sore throat are so general they could be due to a million different things that are common and mundane.

As you had unprotected sex, then an HIV test may be warranted despite the low risk with any result conclusive after 3 months.

Regardless of anything else, as you are sexually active it is smart to get routinely screened for all STI's - most of which are far easier to contract than HIV, and perhaps now would be a good time to have your first screening and try to have them yearly from now on. Being proactive about your sexual health will not only empower you but will reduce further anxiety about past events.

And please always wear a condom from now on.
« Last Edit: April 23, 2018, 07:04:29 pm by CaveyUK »
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #2 on: April 24, 2018, 02:15:07 am »
Thanks for your reply its appreciated.

I would be fairly sure my friend is correct on her std status. My concern was how quick I got these symptoms after we had 3 instances of unprotected vaginal sex. I wa also concerned about my past but luckily it was analy protected with no ejeculation.

In the worst case scenario how difficult would my unprotected sex with her have been tomeither catch or give her hiv if either of us had it bearing in mind I didnt ejeculate in her?

Im guessing its pointless of me to get tested until 3 months regardless? Ive read that any symtoms were too soon to appear until around 2 weeks which is anothr positive sign its unrelated I guess?

Thanks for your help

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #3 on: April 24, 2018, 02:24:30 am »
You don't know and can't know your friends HIV status, even if she tested. There is no point guessing about her status, from a risk assessment point of view this is easy and simple, intercourse without protection is accepting a real world risk for HIV transmission and a greater risk for other easier to transmit STI's.

You had a risk from the unprotected intercourse and so testing would be advisable.
Guidelines are to test at 6 weeks past any incident and then at 13 weeks to confirm the result.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, every time, no exceptions.

Keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please do get fully tested regularly and at least yearly for all STI's including but not limited to HIV and test more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs

Also note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and the only way of knowing is by testing.

More information on HIV Basics, PEP, TaSP and Transmission can be found through the links in my signature to our POZ pages, this includes information on HIV Testing

Kind regards

Jim

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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #4 on: April 24, 2018, 03:13:46 am »
Thanks Jim from a fellow Dub. I agree the only way to tell is take the test but I will he to wait 5 weeks to be at the 6 week mark. Can I ask a few quick questions?

I had full STD testing in May 2017 and everything came back clear, Based on my play with guys prior to this current situation, in the scenarios listed in my oriniginal mail  I should have no or little rick I contracted hiv?

It is only 1 week today since I had unprotected intercourse with the girl. IF she had an infection is it fair to say the aches legs, sore throat and runny nose are not HIV related at this early stage? (Obviously this doesn’t mean I can’t have an infection but my current aches may not be related)

Would taking a rapid HIV test at this stage give any kind of tangeable result?

Generally, is it easy to be infected by unprotected vaginal sex or is HIV a difficult illness to pass?

I appreciate I’m asking a lot of questions which are not easy to answer so any guidance is appreciate.. it’s probably not even relevant but I have crohons disease (never had unprotected anal sex)

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #5 on: April 24, 2018, 04:07:16 am »
Quote
sore throat and runny nose

This never has anything to do with HIV regardless of someones HIV status. See your GP and treat whatever is making you or your friend sick.

Quote
I had full STD testing in May 2017 and everything came back clear, Based on my play with guys prior to this current situation, in the scenarios listed in my oriniginal mail  I should have no or little rick I contracted hiv?

Quote
based on what you have posted specifically, your only risk was the unprotected vaginal sex with your female friend.

Quote
from a risk assessment point of view this is easy and simple, intercourse without protection is accepting a real world risk for HIV transmission and a greater risk for other easier to transmit STI's.

Asked and answered already, CaveyUK has already answered this and so have I, the only HIV concern posted here was the unprotected intercourse with your friend. I'm not sure why you are focused on the activities with the  guys when they were no risk, its not who you do it with its how you do that is a risk or not.

Quote
Would taking a rapid HIV test at this stage give any kind of tangeable result?

3 months would be conclusive. Any negative result before than is a good sign but test as per guidelines.

Quote
Generally, is it easy to be infected by unprotected vaginal sex or is HIV a difficult illness to pass?

HIV is difficult to transmit however the main transmission route in adults is unprotected intercourse

All in all the only risk you had was the unprotected intercourse with you friend, its a real world risk and our advice is to test accordingly for HIV as per guidelines and also test for easier to transmit STI's whilst you are at it.

Take care

Jim

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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #6 on: April 28, 2018, 05:55:27 pm »
 Firstly thanks JimDublin and Caveyuk for your comments and support.

I am now around 11 days after the event and have developed some loose bowel movements and strangely a strong smell from.my urine along with still having sore muscles, throat and tiredness. I got a serious case of panic yesterday and went to  clinic for a Rapid HIV test and full STI test. I know a rapid HIV test is not really accurate at this stage but the nurse told me it was around 75 to 80% accurate and i would need to retest at 6 weeks. The test showed negative for HIV. She also advised the symptoms i have are highly unlikely to be caused by HIV.

I suppose my questions which i am probablt repeating again but in light of my Rapid HIV rest would like an opinion

1)   Would she be right that symptom’s starting between 3 and 11 days are highly unlikely to be HIV related considering i have 4 or so relevant symptoms?
2)   Even tho my Rapid test was done at 10 days would the test be a relatively good indication im negative?
3)   My previous sexual encounter to this was in Feb. Im sure my negative result now is sufficient based on the Feb incident?
4)   Are the symptoms unlikely to be HIV related in that time frame and are even some definetly unrelated?
5)   I have read contracting HIV from unprotected vaginal sex carries a risk of around 0.04 to 0.08%. Would this be correct?
6)   Based on those risk rates would it be fair to say its difficult to contract by this incident?
7) ive also read the stress of worrying about having being infected by HIV can actually cause the symptoms im worried about experincing. Do you think this is possible?


Obviously sex without a condom was a stupid mistake and i will never do this again. Apologies for all the questions but hopefully the answers will give myself some peace of mind and some guidance  for readers some important information.


Thanks you in advance and keep up.your amazing work and support

Offline CaveyUK

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #7 on: April 28, 2018, 07:40:08 pm »
I am now around 11 days after the event and have developed some loose bowel movements and strangely a strong smell from.my urine along with still having sore muscles, throat and tiredness. I got a serious case of panic yesterday and went to  clinic for a Rapid HIV test and full STI test. I know a rapid HIV test is not really accurate at this stage but the nurse told me it was around 75 to 80% accurate and i would need to retest at 6 weeks. The test showed negative for HIV. She also advised the symptoms i have are highly unlikely to be caused by HIV.

I suppose my questions which i am probablt repeating again but in light of my Rapid HIV rest would like an opinion

1)   Would she be right that symptom’s starting between 3 and 11 days are highly unlikely to be HIV related considering i have 4 or so relevant symptoms?

You don't have '4 relevant symptoms'. Symptoms are completely unreliable when it comes to HIV with many not having any symptoms at all. The symptoms you mention are NOT indicative of HIV anyway, and are so general that I bet there will be someone else living on your street right now with the exact same 'symptoms'.

Quote
2)   Even tho my Rapid test was done at 10 days would the test be a relatively good indication im negative?

The general guideline is to test at risk 6 weeks post exposure and 3-months for conclusive. Earlier tests may pick up infection, but many not. So, whilst any negative test is good news the overall answer is no - you need the subsequent tests to confirm your status.

Quote
3)   My previous sexual encounter to this was in Feb. Im sure my negative result now is sufficient based on the Feb incident?

If you are talking about your (protected) sex with men, then it wasn't a risk in the first place. If you are referring to another episode of unprotected anal or vaginal sex, then it is academic really as the only conclusive test will be 3 months following the last instance of unprotected sex, which was 11 days ago.

Quote
4)   Are the symptoms unlikely to be HIV related in that time frame and are even some definetly unrelated?

Asked and answered.

Quote
5)   I have read contracting HIV from unprotected vaginal sex carries a risk of around 0.04 to 0.08%. Would this be correct?
6)   Based on those risk rates would it be fair to say its difficult to contract by this incident?

Transmission stats can be misleading. Yes, it is true that the transmission risk of female to male vaginal infection is low, but it does only take the 1 time as a number of people in this forum will testify to (including myself). HIV is actually a difficult virus to catch and even the highest sex-related transmission route (male to male, anally, as bottom) is also relatively low. The fact is - a risk is a risk, no matter how high or low.

Testing is smart. Yes, the odds are stacked in your favour so no point in freaking out, but it's worth getting to the point of a conclusive test as you can then move on with your life (either knowing you don't have HIV, or having treatment if you do). Either way, you will have a long and healthy life so no point in stressing needlessly.

Quote
7) ive also read the stress of worrying about having being infected by HIV can actually cause the symptoms im worried about experincing. Do you think this is possible?

Very possible. Anxiety can trigger just about every symptom going.

Please remember to get screened for all other STI's as well as HIV though, as most are MUCH more common and MUCH easier to catch.

Just a final word on repeatedly asking the same questions. It is frowned upon here and whilst I tend to be quite laid back, you don't want to upset Jim with his angry-Irish-banning-stick, so please refrain from posting questions which have already been answered. The bottom line with you is that your MSM stuff wasn't a risk, your unprotected vaginal sex was a risk and to prove conclusively HIV negative you need to test out to 3 months. Your symptoms are irrelevant really.

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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #8 on: April 28, 2018, 07:51:46 pm »
Thanks for your reply CaveyUK. I do appreciate repeatedly asking the same question is frowned upon but rest assured i was asking to be troublesome. It was meerly as my own information or testing had changed.

All advice is appreciated and apologies to anyone if im being annoying

Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #9 on: April 29, 2018, 09:05:04 am »
I have one final question and while it might seem like im asking the same thing, maybe its down to a lack ofnunderstand.

As i said i took a rapid hiv test which came back negative (the nurse did day it was only 75% accurate at this early stage).

I know symptoms are an unreliable way to presume ive had infection but is it fair to believe that if the rapid test is to see presence of antibodies, then there is a good possibility of one of thr below scenarios

1) the test is negative because there i am actually negstive?

2) the test hasnt show antobodies yet as the infection hasnt shown a high enough infection (yet) which also shows the symptoms im worried ive had are not related to a possible infection.

Again sorry if my questions looks the same phrased differently. Its not my intention to annoy anyone especially you Jim or Cavey

I am due again in 4 weeks for a 6 week test so regardless will be following up for more conclusive results

Something i am aware of is i may have had somd of these symptoms over the past months years during a time in which i had no hiv risk as i also have Crohons Disease which can cause some of these symptoms. I also have had a stressful time in work the past few months so there are possible other causes. I may well have these symptoms and not taken much notice but have just paniced now due to my possible exposure risk
« Last Edit: April 29, 2018, 09:10:39 am by Johnnyhdublin »

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #10 on: April 29, 2018, 09:18:35 am »
Crohons Disease makes no difference, and testing early is not conclusive but any negative result meaning hiv antibodies are not present is a good sign

all in all you had a risk from the unprotected intercourse and so testing would be advisable.

Guidelines are to test at 6 weeks past any incident and then at 13 weeks to confirm the result,  so any test results post 6-weeks is unlikely to change kust test at 3 months for a conclusive result.

Your symptoms have nothing to do with hiv, if they did the test would already have been positive as symptoms in initial hiv infections is caused by the immune system response not hiv.

Nothing you do will change the results and stressing about the results is pointless.

Test when due and move on with your life!

Jim

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Stop asking irrelevant or already answered questions. Excessive posting will lead to a time out
« Last Edit: April 29, 2018, 09:21:57 am by JimDublin »
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #11 on: April 29, 2018, 09:21:56 am »
Thanks Jim.

Hopefully all will be well. Fully appreciate the amazing work you do here.

Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #12 on: September 30, 2018, 09:03:44 am »

Firstly, i want to praise you for the work you do here. Your knowledge, patience and support are a great help for the many users online.

I know my question maybe a little dumb but please bear with me as fear does not always drive common sense!!

I had my last STD testing in May and all my results came back clear thank god. Since then i have given oral sex to men (no ejeculate in mouth but possibly precum) and women. Ive had protected vaginal sex with 2 women and no anal sex at all with guys or girls.

I know symptoms are not a way to diagnose HIV but i am suffering with a sore throat, runny/blocked nose, mild headache and mild muscle pain for the past week.

I know giving oral sex is considered low risk but i have 3 questions. Sorry if their dumb

1) I know you state someone is not at high risk giving a blowjob unless they have gaping wounds or meth mouth. Im not sure what either would be defined as. I get bleeding gums when i bush my teeth so if i had precum relatively soon after brushing my teeth is this a likely route for infection?

2) If i was giving a woman oral sex and she was relatively close to her period (I would never ask a woman this question as its very personal and none of my business), could any potential fluids / blood cause infection? Ive not had the experience as far as i know its just a general question as one lady had quite thick fluid during oral.

3) Ive had no fever or rash so i truly think my symtoms are simple head cold. Would you beleive on my mail that i have no real chance of infection and more testing is not necessary?

Apologies if my questions are offensive or annoying and thanks in advance

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #13 on: September 30, 2018, 09:45:09 am »
Quote
I know giving oral sex is considered low risk but i have 3 questions. Sorry if their dumb

No, giving a BJ is a near negligible risk and other oral activities are simply no risk.

1.
As in meth mouth and even with such gaping open or bleeding holes in your mouth its rated as near negligible concern

The virus is very fragile, and your mouth has dozens of protein and enzymes that damage the virus and rendering it unable to infect. So even with holes in you head , there is no need to run test every time you give a blow job, its such a near negligible concern, just get tested the next time you are due for a regular checkup and fully expect a negative result.

Brushing your teeth and a bit of bleeding is not an issue.

2.
No unless she had pints of it pouring out and in some mad event and vacuum sealed sucking event you drank a few pints with large bleeding holes of your own in your head, so if that highly unlikely event happened I doubt you will be the first human to be verified infected from this but than I default to my answer on Q1 and that simple boils down to move on with your life.

3.
I believe you need to stop looking at "symptoms" every poster in the "AM I" section has so called symptoms  ;) Truth is most common symptoms is none at all or not noticeable and nothing you posted warrants early testing.

Simply move on and test whenever regularly due, stop trying to think up new ways of being at risk when your not

Jim

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Offline Jim Allen

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #14 on: September 30, 2018, 09:54:48 am »
Look here is what you need to know about cunnilingus and for a multitude of reasons no matter what "What ifs" you have its simply never going to be anything close to a "near negligible" concern like giving a guy a blowjob.

HIV via cunnilingus, see the fluid a woman produces when sexually excited comes from the Bartholin's glands, this is a lubricating fluid and does not have any more hiv present than other bodily secretions such as saliva, sweat or tears.
Saliva, sweat and tears are not infectious fluids.

Keep in mind that HIV firstly needs to be present for it to be a risk and in sufficient quantity for it to transmit, it also than needs an effective route,
and it must also reach cells which are susceptible to infection.

Simple Cunnilingus does not meet the biological requirements.  On top of that your "what if" blood well keep in mind there is the role that the environment has when preforming Cunnilingus as any fluids exposed outside the body to the environment are not HIV infectious, saliva is a barrier and your mouth simply lacks the cells to infect and than there is quantity barrier as its mixed with other fluids and even a bit of pure blood is not going to overcome the barriers or infect you.

You will simply not be the worlds first to be verified to have been infected this way so relax and stop worrying about women. Just use a condom when having intercourse with them, that is about it.

Jim

« Last Edit: September 30, 2018, 09:58:26 am by JimDublin »
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #15 on: September 30, 2018, 10:19:46 am »
Thanks for your frank and detailed answers. As i said, my question may have beem dumb!!

Much appreciated support and keep up the amazing work.

From one Dub to another

Go raibh maith agat


Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #16 on: September 30, 2018, 01:50:21 pm »
I know this ia possible not the correct forum for this question but you mods have great knowledge so here it goes!!

Obviously as stated i enjoying giving blowjobs and understand the act is near neglible.

My question is on safety. Ive never let a guy cum in my mouth as i have had the fear of hiv infection should they be positive.

Is it still near neglible if they cum in my mouth and wouls it be safer to swallow imediately or spit imediately?

Sorry if this is the wrong place to ask but forearmed ia forewarned i suppose!

Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #17 on: September 30, 2018, 01:52:02 pm »
Or would the advice be to not take ejuculate in my mouth at all for maximum safety. Sorry again

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #18 on: September 30, 2018, 02:07:04 pm »
Quote
Obviously as stated i enjoying giving blowjobs and understand the act is near neglible

You have answered your own question. Whatever you add to the situation about blowjobs the answer is going to be the same.

Understand that worst case scenario is the default presumption when we give risk assessments.

Quote
Is it still near neglible if they cum in my mouth and wouls it be safer to swallow imediately or spit imediately?

Near negligible is presuming semen and/or pre-ejaculate is in contact with the inside of your mouth, back of the mouth/throat.   

So spit or swallow no difference in reality when discussing HIV as the stomach does not give any route or chance whatsoever.  I would not like to comment on the other easier to transmit STIs and swallowing, that is another forum altogether.

Look stop focusing on this, its unhealthy. You have an assessment done and nothing you think up off is going to be new to me or not taken into account when we told you its near negligible and it does not warrant testing over it, just test whenever you are next normally due a check up.

Jim
« Last Edit: September 30, 2018, 02:10:10 pm by JimDublin »
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #19 on: September 30, 2018, 02:19:16 pm »
The best advice I can give you is if you keep worrying about HIV from near negligible concerns take PrEP, its a daily pill that offers an additional layer of protection from HIV.

HIV ireland have information on PrEP in Ireland including links to pharmacists that stock it.

https://www.hivireland.ie/hiv/prevention/prep-2/prep-map/
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #20 on: September 30, 2018, 02:31:37 pm »
Thanks Jim i do understand there are other stis which can be caught i suppose mt big concern is hiv because most others can be cured.

You may have a great point about looking into PrEP. I will look into this. Out of curiosity is it expensive to buy or ia it covered under the DPS scheme in Ireland? I would guess its not covered knowing the HSE pal!

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #21 on: September 30, 2018, 02:33:52 pm »
Actually got all the info from your link. Thanks Jim

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #22 on: September 30, 2018, 03:52:35 pm »
You're welcome.

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #23 on: December 30, 2018, 08:55:08 am »
Hi Guys,

Im probably overthinking but here it goes.

I visited an escort yesterday and had protected vaginal intercourse with her including me cuming inaide her.

When i withdrew from her i noticed a small amount of blood near the top of the condom but it appeared the condom was intact with sperm in the tip.

I didnt try filling it with water or deeply inspect the condom but believe it was ok. As im fairly irrational at times (jimdublin can probably confirm by previous posts) i will add a few factors

1) i had brought my own condom but the escort insisted we use hers which i recall she openeing from a new sealed box. I have this stupid fear of someone putting pinholes to purposely infect you but her not allowing me use mine would lead me to think she was afraid of the same thing from me!

2) She performed oral on me first WITH the condom which leads me to believe she is as concerned with catching something from me!

3) A small part of blood on the outside of the condom after sex isnt something to worry about?

Sorry if this sounds crazy but im a panicer.

Should i consider PEP as i am only 24hrs post event or is that massively overkill?

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #24 on: December 30, 2018, 09:29:28 am »
To add and more of a question, while at home last night and reading online that condoms shred to leave no doubt they failed, i put a thumb tack through the center of a condom, masturbated quite vigoursly and when finished i filled with water and to my surprise i had abaolutely no leakeage which had me scratching my head??

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #25 on: December 30, 2018, 10:28:27 am »
Hiya

Stop messing around with condoms thinking it means anything or that your hand somehow is the same stress as actually fucking someone or calibrated laboratory conditions & stress testing as it's not!

You had protected intercourse, as long as the condom did not shred you have no logical reason to worry, and need to move on with your life. Nothing you mentioned here is any HIV concern whatsoever and I doubt you and this sex worker will be front line Sunday news anytime in the future ... Do you understand what I am saying?

No need for PEP, no need to test, no need to stress, put it behind you already. Contuine to use condoms for any intercourse no exceptions and test out of standard routine at least yearly like every sexually active adult should for HIV and far easier to transmit STI's.

I'll say this again, the best advice I can give you is if you keep having irrational fears about HIV consider takeing PrEP going forward, its a daily pill that offers an additional layer of protection from HIV

Also a therapist to help you with your irrational fears might be worth looking into.

Jim
« Last Edit: December 30, 2018, 10:31:00 am by JimDublin »
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #26 on: December 30, 2018, 10:35:32 am »
Thanks Jim as usual for your frank and direct answer. The condom seemed fully intact it was just the sign of blood made me think.

I did consider using Prep but its just not something i can afford monthly and while its a small price conpared to contracting hiv, i never have unprotected intercourse, only oral.

I do agree i could see a therapist but ive had a lot of change in my life recently including the loss of a parent so my mental state isnt particularly good anyway.

I had a recent full std screening last week which was 14 weeks after my last sexual (protected) encounter which came back clear for any sti/std.

As i said im a panicer by nature and only in the past 2 yeara have really started to become obsessed with the fear of hiv.

Appreciate your support and amazing work you do here Jim

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #27 on: December 30, 2018, 10:58:19 am »
Quote
I do agree i could see a therapist but ive had a lot of change in my life recently including the loss of a parent so my mental state isnt particularly good anyway.

Really sorry to hear about your recent loss. Wishing you strength during this time.

That said even more reason to talk to your GP next week, I know they are generally pretty fucking useless in Ireland however if you talk to a GP about how you are feeling about this loss and coping (in this case not) with your HIV angst they can help and also recommend a good therapist depending on your needs.

Quote
I had a recent full std screening last week which was 14 weeks after my last sexual (protected) encounter which came back clear for any sti/std.

As i said im a panicer by nature and only in the past 2 yeara have really started to become obsessed with the fear of hiv

Good however testing over nothing all the time is not a healthy or a sustainable way of coping.

You need to be able to have sex and simply move on without fears, and instead be relaxed engough to test out of standard routine instead of irrational irrelevant fear.

Look a lot of LGBT community members I know who are taking PrEP are buying online and having it delivered to Ireland and working with GP's for the routine check-ups It's what about 25 euro a month, example:

https://www.iwantprepnow.co.uk/buy-prep-now/

No offense intended but I'll be honest my thinking is if you can afford the odd session with a sex worker in Ireland than you can afford it pay for PrEP. Think about it and if you do decide to go with PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV going forward talk first to the clinc or if not possible then a GP.

Jim



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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #28 on: December 30, 2018, 11:13:09 am »
Absolutely no offence taken Jim and your right. I didnt realise it was possible to get prep for around €25 per month as the last i read it was around €160 per month. If ive read incorrecrly than this changes my view.

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #29 on: December 30, 2018, 12:46:56 pm »
You're welcome, the 160+ per month is HSE as they only have the brand product vs generic band when it comes to PrEP
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #30 on: December 30, 2018, 03:17:19 pm »
Thats the HSE for you!! Greedy

Thanks Jim

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #31 on: August 18, 2019, 03:56:02 pm »
Hi All,

I have a question on risk exposure.

7 weeks ago I had sex with a guy where I was the insertive partner. I wore a condom and used lube. We had sex for around 15 mins and stopped as I couldn't ejeculate. When I checked the condom (visually) the condom looked to be perfectly fine.

Since then I have hard oral sex with 2 guys and did not let either ejeculate in my mouth. I was fingered by both.

I know symptoms aren't a way to determine infection but I have felt sickly the past week.

Is there any concern from the activities above? If the condom failed it would be obvious right?  If the guy had precum on his finger when fingering me is it a hiv Risk?

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #32 on: August 18, 2019, 04:31:24 pm »
Johnny

Don't post outside this thread.

Fingering does not lead to HIV transmission and, you had intercourse with a condom. Now as long as it didn't obviously shred during the act of intercourse there is no reason to stress over this encounter.

Move on with your life, continue to use condoms, consider using PrEP as well and test like every sexual active adult should at least yearly for HIV and STI's
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #33 on: August 18, 2019, 04:35:57 pm »
Hi

I would like some feedback on my potential risks I may have had.

6/7 weeks ago I had anal sex with a guy as the Insertive (top) and used a condom and plenty of lube. After 15 mins I was unable to ejeculate so we stopped and I checked the condom visually and it seemed perfectly fine. I tried to bottom but and with lube/condom as soon as the guy tried to insert I stopped him as it was too painful. So both instances with condom.

On 2 occasions since then I have had mutual oral with guys and on both occasions the guys fingered/rimmed me.

In the past week or so I have felt fairly sickly and while in Belgium last week I got some hard red lumps appear on my back, legs and hip. I'm fairly sure these are mosquito bites to be honest but as usual I am putting 1 and 1 together and getting 20. I know symtoms mean nothing but was concerned as I've had muscle aches, headaches, exhaustion and these lumps.

My question is on the scenarios above

1) I'm guessing if the condoms failed it would be obvious.

2) if either guy had precum on their fingers when fingeringnme (I don't think they had) is this a HIV Risk?

Thanks in advance

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #34 on: August 18, 2019, 04:40:52 pm »
@Jim - Apologies for the double post I thought the other was deleted so resubscribed

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #35 on: August 18, 2019, 04:46:08 pm »
No prob.

Just post here going forward saves me from having to merge and move stuff around
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #36 on: August 18, 2019, 04:50:06 pm »
Cheers.

So all in all it would be obvious if the condom failed to the point it could have been unprotected and fingerings even if there could be precum on the finger is not a concern?

Apologies again I'm sure you can see by my thread I'm a worrier

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #37 on: August 18, 2019, 05:32:40 pm »
Correct.

Look if anything of what you had posted was any HIV concern I would have been the first to tell to test.

It's not, relax move on with your life

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #38 on: August 18, 2019, 05:46:18 pm »
Thanks Jim and again your support on this forum amazing to countless people. Hope to bump into you in Dublin someday and buy you a beer!

Out of curiousity in Ireland are HIV exposures increasing or has the rate of new contractions started to decline in recent years? Are we as nation more aware and safer?

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #39 on: August 18, 2019, 06:12:07 pm »
Hmmm well as a nation we are totally fucked.
Bad education and years of underfunding.

Week 32 2019 HSE report, is showing 310 new HIV cases whilst last year this time it was 300 and last year ended with a record high year for the state 531 cases total



STI rates are at record highs as well with many testing at an advanced (late) stage of HIV infection.  Ireland’s rate of new diagnoses is about 10.2 per 100,000 people in 2018, while the European average is 6.2 per 100,000.

In addition STI clincs are so overwhelmed they are sending people away weekly instead of testing them as it's reached breaking point

https://www.irishexaminer.com/breakingnews/ireland/record-hiv-diagnosis-rates-a-crisis-say-campaigners-906815.html

https://www.thejournal.ie/hiv-sti-clinic-dublin-4685437-Jun2019/





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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #40 on: August 18, 2019, 06:20:13 pm »
Jesus that's alarming. Almost double the EU average  and averaging 10 new HIV positive patients per week.

They are scary statistics. Knowing this government they have no interest in tackling the problem so it's even more incredibly important that places like poz forums are educating people. Im sure the cost of the HIV medication is expensive in Ireland too so. Wouldn't surprise me if the government aren't tackling the problem as they know how much money can be made on medication

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #41 on: August 18, 2019, 06:33:14 pm »
What's even more scary is the population of Ireland has only increased by 0.5% compared to 2018 but the rate of STI/STD infection has increased by Almost 20% vs 2018!

That is startling

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #42 on: August 18, 2019, 06:36:27 pm »
HIV treatment/care is free to the patient, so it's just a cost to the state although if we tested everyone it would be cheaper to treat them all now as we would know early before they get sick and before they pass it on, in addition with treatment it would mean they can no longer sexual pass it. See https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=71864.0

The problem is complex here as it includes fixing decades of bad behaviour including the consequences of ignoring warnings & concerns about our poor substandard (Catholic) sex education in schools and, allowing ethos to continue to dictate education whilst it also in part due to our closed-minded attitudes towards sex particularly safer sex and anything outside of hetero-sex is not really discussed openly, this is compounded by clinics without the funding needed and barely any rural facilities

I could go on for hours but like I said it's complex and I don't see it changing anytime soon

Jim
« Last Edit: August 18, 2019, 07:00:54 pm by Jim Allen »
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #43 on: September 21, 2020, 04:20:08 pm »
Hi Guys,

I met a guy I've had a casual oral relationship with for a year or so earlier today (I know in these covid times this was dumb).

During this he rimmed me and we performed oral sex on each other.

My concern is not just the unprotected oral.

I agreed to bottom for him and he performed anal sex on me with a condom and plenty of lube. During the sex he changed the condom as it has become a little bit lose. We stopped after awhile because he was unable to cum and I had started to get sore. It visually appeared that both times the condom was fully intact.

I am generally a worrier so just looking for some reassurance since this was with condom and no ejeculation. Also on the unprotected oral

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #44 on: September 21, 2020, 04:40:04 pm »
Hiya,

HIV can't transmit through an intact latex or polyurethane condom. If a condom fails during the act of intercourse it's obvious. There is no reason to be stressing or testing outside of standard routine as long as this obvious issue did not happen.

As for giving a blowjob, we have covered this topic before,it's such a near negligible HIV concern that we don't even recommend specifically testing over it. Rimming and getting a blowjob are no HIV risks.

Finally, when you do go in for your next routine STI screening talk to them about PrEP, taking PrEP would offer an additional layer of protection against HIV going forward and prehaps peace of mind.

Best, Jim
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #45 on: September 21, 2020, 04:46:30 pm »
Look a lot of LGBT community members I know who are taking PrEP are buying online and having it delivered to Ireland and working with GP's for the routine check-ups It's what about 25 euro a month, example:

https://www.iwantprepnow.co.uk/buy-prep-now/

Think about it and if you do decide to go with PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV going forward talk first to the clinc or if not possible then a GP.

Jim

The best advice I can give you is if you keep worrying about HIV from near negligible concerns take PrEP, its a daily pill that offers an additional layer of protection from HIV.

HIV ireland have information on PrEP in Ireland including links to pharmacists that stock it.

https://www.hivireland.ie/hiv/prevention/prep-2/prep-map/

Ill add to what I posted before the below:

https://man2man.ie/getting-prep-online/

https://www.sexualwellbeing.ie/sexual-health/prep/where-to-get-prep/
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #46 on: September 21, 2020, 04:46:50 pm »
Thanks for the reassurance Jim. I'm 100% certain there was no condom damage as you said it's obvious. We stopped a nunber of times to ass more lube so it would have been spotted if there was during thr act. I'm sure the fact he did no ejeculate either should settle me even more but I'm a bit of an idiot when it comes to common sense situations.

He was a little rough with me so maybe this is why I'm over thinking too.

I know the condoms were new because I bought them today (durex extra safe)

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #47 on: September 21, 2020, 04:48:50 pm »
You're welcome.

Look do consider the PrEP and continue to use condoms for any intercourse, test out of routine at least yealry for STI's & HIV.

Best, Jim
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #48 on: September 21, 2020, 04:56:07 pm »
Jim I know you recommended prep before. To be totally honest the reason I can't (or believe I can't) take this option is I share the same doctor and pharmacy with my ex wife and due to our medication needs we still share the same DPS scheme.

If she somehow became aware of me using prep it would raise a lot of trouble and question about my sexual preferences as I am not openly bisexual. My family are not the type of people who would support my choices and I'm positive they would not be supportive.
« Last Edit: September 21, 2020, 04:58:20 pm by Johnnyhdublin »

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #49 on: September 22, 2020, 12:00:10 am »
Hiya,

Sorry to hear your family would not be supportive if they knew about your sexual orientation. There are options to obtain PrEP that don't go through the HSE.

Anyhow, do keep using condoms for any intercourse, no exceptions and test out of standard routine at least yealry for STI's and HIV.

Best, Jim
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #50 on: September 28, 2020, 02:38:31 am »
Hi Jim,

I have a couple of questions if you don't mind?

If I bottom for a guy, using brand new unopened condoms, plenty of lube, pulling out before any ejeculation, would you deem this extremely safe?  I get that oral is a negligible risk so I will stop worrying about this.

With Oral, would you class the risk with and without cum in the mouth as the same neglible risk?

Couple of questions on PREP

1. Does this need to be prescribed by my local GP or can it be prescribed by a sexual health clinic? I would. Prefer not to use my local GP

2. Do you have any idea how much this costs monthly in Ireland?

3. How long does it take to be effective?

I would still be planning to use condoms without ejeculation even when I take prep

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #51 on: September 28, 2020, 05:40:17 am »
Hiya,

Quote
I get that oral is a negligible risk so I will stop worrying about this.

With Oral, would you class the risk with and without cum in the mouth as the same neglible risk?

I really have answered this already, anyhow, both would be a near negligible risk.

Quote
1. Does this need to be prescribed by my local GP or can it be prescribed by a sexual health clinic? I would. Prefer not to use my local GP

PrEP is prescribed by the clinic.

Quote
2. Do you have any idea how much this costs monthly in Ireland?

The legal route, PrEP is available free of charge to those who meet HSE clinical eligibility criteria.

If the HSE will not provide you with free PrEP you can still get an prescription from the clinic and buy PrEP through the participating pharmacies. You can find the pharmacy listings here: https://www.hivireland.ie/hiv/prevention/prep-2/prep-map/

The Brand-name Truvada costs around €400 for 30 pills, but generic versions from Teva and Mylan are available for less than €100 for 30 pills last time i checked. 

Quote
3. How long does it take to be effective?

Daily PrEP after 7 days would provide protection for receptive anal sex.

There is also on-demand PrEP.  Now On-Demand dosing is different, it's considered as effective as daily PrEP for anal sex.

On-Demand dosing is would be:
- Take 2 pills 2 – 24 hours before sex
- Take 1 pill 24 hours later
- Take 1 more pill 24 hours after that

Quote
I would still be planning to use condoms without ejeculation even when I take prep

Yeah. Look PrEP is highly effective in HIV prevention, it's not perfect though, nothing is. PrEP also offers no addtional protection against acquiring other STI's.

Again, HIV can't transmit through an intact latex or polyurethane condom, however, there is no such thing as safe sex just safer sex. Condoms can break, also, some sexual acts described as safe in regards to HIV still pose risks for other STI's.

Condoms can reduce the risks of STI's, however, the levels of protection for various STIs, depends greatly on differences in how the diseases or infections are transmitted.  Some infections (Not HIV) are transmitted primarily by skin-to-skin contact, which may infect areas not covered by a condom, such as genital herpes, human papillomavirus [HPV], etc.

End of the day, sex comes with risks, no need to stress though, just try to reduce the risks by using condoms, consider PrEP in regards to HIV and test routinely for HIV & STI's.

Best, Jim

Info about, On-Demand PrEP
https://www.poz.com/article/ondemand-prep-regimen-works-us-study
https://i-base.info/guides/prep/on-demand
https://www.aidsmap.com/news/jul-2018/demand-dosing-effective-daily-dosing-first-year-french-prep-study

PrEP information for Ireland:
https://www.hivireland.ie/hiv/prevention/prep-2/
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https://www.sexualwellbeing.ie/sexual-health/prep/where-to-get-prep/
« Last Edit: September 28, 2020, 05:45:21 am by Jim Allen »
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #52 on: September 28, 2020, 06:46:51 am »
Your a gent and a scholar Jim.

I'll try leave you alone now.

Stay safe and well

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #53 on: September 28, 2020, 06:57:51 am »
Sorry one last question on condom usage and hiv. When people state that condoms are not 100 effective against protection from HIV.

Is that due to possible breakage? As in I would assume so long as the condom is not visably damaged then that does mean I would be 100% sure of protection against HIV. Not other STIs

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #54 on: September 28, 2020, 07:45:25 am »
Hiya,

HIV can't transmit through an intact latex or polyurethane condom. When they break during intercourse it's obvious, as long as this obvious issue doesn't happen there is no need to stress about it.

The problem with condoms like most things in life is incorrect usage and/or inconsistent usage.

http://ec.europa.eu/research/press/2003/pr2010-hiv-en.html
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During the last 15 years, the European Commission has financed several research projects aimed at studying, (directly or indirectly), the use of condoms as a preventive measure against sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV/AIDS. These projects were carried out not only in Europe, but also in Asia and sub-Saharan Africa, where the burden of the HIV epidemic is at its highest. All the studies concluded that the male condom was an effective way of preventing the transmission of HIV, with an efficacy close to 100% when the condom is used appropriately.
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Offline Jim Allen

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #55 on: September 28, 2020, 07:54:55 am »
Your a gent and a scholar Jim.

I'll try leave you alone now.

Stay safe and well

You're welcome.
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #56 on: September 28, 2020, 10:50:10 am »
Sorry Jim back with a hypotethtical question.

If I was bottoming for a guy and he had precum on his fingers or hand when putting on a condom, am I at risk of HIV if it gets on his condom just as he's about to insert

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #57 on: September 28, 2020, 12:34:21 pm »
Hiya,

No the fluids on his hands when putting on the condom isn't going to result in you acquiring HIV. HIV is sexually transmitted inside the confins of the body as in never being exposured outside the body.

Best, Jim

 
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #58 on: September 28, 2020, 01:02:56 pm »
Thanks Jim. Sorry what I meant was if he had for precum from his hand onto the condom and then put his penis inside me immediately could that potential have a HIV risk.

Really another possibly dumb question. I orginiay thought it was durex condoms but have since realised it was boots brand. I read some reports that they are poor quality. I'm sure they have to be CE marked and a decent quality. The condom looked fully intact and there was no ejeculation. I just now a bit concerned when reading some horror stories about boots condom quality and tears/rips

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #59 on: September 28, 2020, 01:09:14 pm »
Hiya

Whatever fluids were on his hands it's not an HIV risk.

Regarding boots, HIV can't transmit through an intact latex or polyurethane condom. When they break during intercourse it's obvious, as long as this obvious issue doesn't happen there is no need to stress about it.
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #60 on: September 28, 2020, 01:10:09 pm »
Boots is walgreens pharmacy for anyone not from the UK/Ireland reading this.
« Last Edit: September 28, 2020, 01:16:56 pm by Jim Allen »
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #61 on: September 28, 2020, 01:12:59 pm »
Appreciate it Jim.

Thanks for the reassurances. Goes a long way for idiots like me!

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #62 on: September 28, 2020, 01:55:08 pm »
You're grand.
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #63 on: September 28, 2020, 02:00:41 pm »
I have a very abnormal fear of HIV but not to the point I don't worry in the heat of the moment as I know I'm sensible and generally don't take risks. But then I panic afterwards and common sense goes out the window. I sure be more worries about covid from meeting this guy than I should be about HIV as I took no real HIV risk.

I lack sense at the best of times  >:(


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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #64 on: September 28, 2020, 02:39:42 pm »
Johnny, Ill give you my two cents on this.

After reading all your post, taking a guess, and it being Ireland I would suspect, your fears in part are triggered by some deep routed yet misguided guilt about sex and sexuality. Prehaps as accepting sexuality particularity, anything other than heterosexuality is still a taboo despite some limited progress in recent years.

However, what do I know? I am not a therapist, just a guy living with HIV who volunteers to tell people to use condoms and to test regularly.  :)

If you keep having these fears, the PrEP might aid in giving you peace of mind but, beyond that, you prehaps should consider talking to a therapist at some stage.
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #65 on: September 28, 2020, 03:51:38 pm »
You know a lot more than me that's for sure Jim.

As for you living with HIV yourself, I can only say I have massive respect for you and the work you do here with the other mods to support, guide and reassure people like me.

I really struggle with basic common sense when I let my mind overthink situations and regardless how much I can see I'm paranoid I still fall I to that trap.

Wishing you safety during covid and best wishes my friend


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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #66 on: September 28, 2020, 03:55:03 pm »
You're welcome
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #67 on: February 26, 2022, 11:50:53 am »
Hi Everyone. I am looking for some advice on a recent potential exposure. I will start by apologising in advance if this post is a little graphic but I don't know how to post it without showing context.

Exactly 18 days ago I hooked up with a guy I meet regularly. I agreed to bottom for him.

We started by me giving him unprotected oral and he was a little rough with me. Once he got properly hard he put on a condom and use water based lube on both my ass and his condom. I was very tight and so he decided to force himself hard into me and was rough. I pulled away and told him it was too sore but he quickly forced himself into me again with me being ready and again was very rough for a few seconds. At that point I pulled away and told him to stop.

I looked around and it appeared to me at least that the condom was fully intact when he was taking it off.

I was a bit shocked to be honest so wasn't quite sure what  to do but he decide to climb ontonme and rub his cock against my ass without a condom.

At this point I was just frozen but eventually got him to stop and i got dressed and left.

For the past few days I have had a really sore throat, runny nose, ache and pains all over and have what feels like a swollen lymph node in my arm pit. On top of this my anus has been very sore over the past 2 days.

I'm really concerned so hoping you can offer some advice or opinion.



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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #68 on: February 26, 2022, 12:07:44 pm »
Hiya,

Look, it sounds like this encounter was not what you expected or fully consented to and I hope you are doing alright.

Regarding HIV, I read your post three times, nothing you mentioned would warrant HIV testing outside of the standard yearly routine, there was only a minute HIV risk from giving a bj.

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse correctly and consistently, every time, with no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV

Keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as safe in terms of acquiring HIV might still pose a risk for other easier acquired STI's. So please do get tested at least yearly for STI's including but not limited to HIV, and more frequently if condomless intercourse occurs.

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms, and the only way of knowing is by testing.

Kind regards

Jim

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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #69 on: February 26, 2022, 12:23:51 pm »
Thanks for your quick response and comments Jim. Not not exactly consensual  but not as scary as I may have sounded. More angry and upset.

Can I ask, since he rubbed his bare penis head against the opening of my anus would this not be a risk if there was precum? Incase he pushed it in with his finger?

Im pretty sure the condom stayed in tact so less freaked over that.

I know symptoms aren't a way to diagnose but mind is the mind.

I know rapid tests are useless in this time frame so pointless taking one?

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #70 on: February 26, 2022, 12:43:01 pm »
Hiya,

Rubbing against your anus regardless of whether fluids were present or not isn't an HIV risk, fingering isn't an HIV risk.

Quote
For the past few days I have had a really sore throat, runny nose, ache and pains all over and have what feels like a swollen lymph node in my arm pit. On top of this my anus has been very sore over the past 2 days.

Nothing to do with HIV from this encounter.

Quote
I know rapid tests are useless in this time frame so pointless taking one?

You don't need an HIV test over this encounter.

You should contact your GP to treat whatever is making you feel unwell instead of focusing on HIV. I also suspect the sore anus and the other symptoms are unrelated to each other. Now a GP in Ireland will most likely ask you to test for COVID first before being seen. 

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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #71 on: February 26, 2022, 12:48:27 pm »
Thanks for all the answers Jim I won't waste my time either the test over this then.

Last question if that's OK.

When you mention in some replies that things aren't HIV specific, do you mean there are symptoms that are HIV specific?

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #72 on: February 26, 2022, 12:59:50 pm »
Last question if that's OK.

When you mention in some replies that things aren't HIV specific, do you mean there are symptoms that are HIV specific?

...

Despite shit people are reading online, initial HIV infection rarely causes any noticeable symptoms. I wish it did because we would then not have up to 50% late or very late detected HIV cases (AIDS) within the EU.

Anyhow, most of the stuff people post here and other online forums falls under never related to initial HIV infection or so vague that it could be just about nothing or any number of more common infections/bugs.

I stubbed my toe this morning, I did not stress about the possibility of an incurable rare brain tumour or about a burger I ate years ago when vising the UK.   ;)
« Last Edit: February 26, 2022, 01:09:24 pm by Jim Allen »
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #73 on: February 26, 2022, 01:10:25 pm »
Understood Jim and thanks for the answer.

Thanks for the info and help I will try relax.

go raibh maith agat


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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #74 on: April 06, 2024, 06:08:00 pm »
Hi All,

I am looking for some urgent advice. I have been having a very casual hook up with a gay guy for 3/4 years. I have bottomed for him and perfom oral sex on him.

Today I had a hook up with him where I bottomed, condom changed twice and he did not ejeculate before we stopped. However, what's really shook me is by pure coincidence he left his HIVmedication in his kitchen and it was the first time I found out he is HIV positive.

Before anyone judges me I know it's his business but we have had conversations multiple times over those years about testing and him saying he had no infections/ all clear from the testing. He never once told me he had HIV.

I'm terrified now and even though he wore 2 condoms and both stayed intact from what i could see, he did rub the head of his penis against my asshole without condoms and fingered me a bit. I am now panicking that I may have been at significant risk. He has assured me he is undetectable as he's taking something called Odefsey and says he's undetectable for over 3 years. The fact he lied about his HIV status, the more I don't trust he is undetectable.

I can't help but panic that I should go amd get Emergency PEP. Please help me with some advice e
« Last Edit: April 06, 2024, 06:26:03 pm by Johnnyhdublin »

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #75 on: April 06, 2024, 08:53:33 pm »
HIV is transmitted through unprotected anal or vaginal sex, or sharing injection needles.

People who are living HIV who are taking meds and undetectable for 6 months can't transmit HIV.

According to your situation you were NOT at risk for HIV and you do NOT need PEP.

Have a great day,
Michael
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With no exceptions, use condoms correctly and consistently for anal or vaginal intercourse
Talk to a healthcare provider about PrEP as another layer of protection

Get tested yearly for HIV and other STIs.
If you don’t use condoms and/or PrEP, test more frequently

Some sexual practices described as safe in terms of acquiring HIV still pose a risk for other more easily acquired STIs. It is possible to show no signs or symptoms from an STI so testing is the only way to know.

Get tested at least yearly for STIs, including but not limited to HIV, and more frequently if condomless intercourse occurs.

What’s the ONLY way to know if you’ve been infected by HIV or an STI?
Get tested.


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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #76 on: April 07, 2024, 03:29:57 am »
Thanks for your reply. I appreciate that if he's undetectable he can't pass it on and indo understand its my responsibility to make sure i am safe. I guess the concern is that we have discussed our testing for years and at no point had he told me that he actually had HIV, just that his routine tests were all negative.

Ita now a trust thing, how can I trust hea actually U=U if he lied about being HIV positive. I feel like i am probably missing the opportunity to take emergency pep unless i act today/tomorrow as it will br 72hrs on Tuesday evening.

I don't even know how i would get Emergency PEP with discretion as I am attached (non physical relationship)
« Last Edit: April 07, 2024, 04:00:54 am by Johnnyhdublin »

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #77 on: April 07, 2024, 04:22:50 am »
Quote
Today I had a hook up with him where I bottomed, condom changed twice and he did not ejeculate before we stopped

You had no HIV exposure regardless of his HIV status.

Quote
he did rub the head of his penis against my asshole without condoms and fingered me a bit.

Not an HIV risk

Quote
Ita now a trust thing

No it's not.

It's an emotional issue. You didn't engage in activities that were an HIV risk regardless of his HIV status or treatment adherence.

However you found out he is living with HIV and despite not having a risk,  you are having an emotional wobble and reaction.

No PEP is needed, move on with your life
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #78 on: April 07, 2024, 04:32:12 am »
Hi Jim,

I agree its an emotional response. I do understand he doesn't need to disclose hia status and ita my job make sure I use protection however its rhe fact we openly discussed our testing ans my fear of HIV for over 3 years and he never once disclosed his status, just said he teats regular and his screenings are clear. Now it appears why he was saying is clear was undetectable.

If I'd have know I could have at least made rhe choice of whether I had a physical relationship regardless of the risks.

I know you say PEP is not necessary but I almost feel I need it for my peace of mind. Is there anywhere I Dublin incan go tomorrow to get it without it being a big deal where my GP will.be aware?

As I said, condoms were used over the past years and all tests i took where negative and common sense tells me I'm still negative but know I know his status my head can't get past the fear

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #79 on: April 07, 2024, 04:43:27 am »
🙄

Quote
I could have at least made rhe choice

Nobody took your choices away from you. No matter what someone claims, you are responsible for your sexual health.

The right choice is for you to practice safer sex, you did that, congratulations 🎉 and and from the activities mentioned had no HIV exposure, no HIV risk and no drama or PEP is needed.

Enough drama, I'm not going to entertain this nonsense any further
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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #80 on: April 07, 2024, 04:44:27 am »
Quote
Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.
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Offline Johnnyhdublin

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #81 on: April 07, 2024, 04:56:22 am »
Jim, it wasn't my intention to annoy or waste anyones time. I fully understand my questions could be stupid or annoying to you but I'm not asking them to be disruptive. I'm clearly very shaken by yesterday and can't help felw that way. What is common sense for you might be clouded as he'll for me right now. Sorry if I've wasted anyone's time. I just wanted to react inside a window period that's all.

I take your advice on board and will move on with a no risk outcome. Thanks for your support

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Re: EMERGENCY PEP
« Reply #82 on: April 08, 2024, 05:01:50 am »
I want to be very clear on this, it has nothing to do with being annoying or asking questions.

We provide safer sex information and HIV risk assessments. You had no HIV risk, no exposure from the activities mentioned here, and no PEP is needed. What you need to understand is the guy's HIV status, treatment status, viral load and ultimately your feelings don't change that and we are not going to pretend otherwise or go on about it as that would be a disservice to you and the wider community.

In short, someone you had safer sex with, not in a relationship, who owes you absolutely nothing, kept their private medical information, which has zero impact on you, private...

Quote
we openly discussed our testing ans my fear of HIV

It's overall a pointless item to discuss with someone. No honry guy has ever or will ever declare: Suck this, oh wait, now you ask, I have untreated HIV, a dose of Syphilis or some Herpes for you. It doesn't happen...

Also, the next person you sleep with could claim to test regularly, which means absolutely nothing to you because even if true and that's a big "if", it just means they didn't have HIV a few months before their last test ... no good to you on the day whatsoever.

As for your irrational HIV fears, consider talking to a therapist instead.

Quote
common sense

Safer sex!

Just presume they are living with untreated HIV & STIs and if you decide to have sex then focus on what you can do to reduce your risks and at the moment that's mainly Condoms & PrEP. Keep in mind that sexual activities that are not an HIV risk remain a risk for easier to pass on STIs, so get an STI screening yearly and talk to the clinic again about getting vaccinated against HPV & Hepatitis B.

I consider this topic now closed!

 
« Last Edit: April 08, 2024, 05:15:36 am by Jim Allen »
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