Anxious and Super Worried

[justmesw]

Hello Poz community,
I discovered this forum and am hoping for some good advice while I wait in what I believe to be a liminal space.

Here is my situation:
Stupidly, I received oral from a lady of unknown HIV status. I am typically very clean but had a lapse of judgement. In the moment, the lady produced plastic wrap and I guess I figured that was good. There was one time where she had to re-wrap around the base of my penis and then shortly after she just tossed the plastic and finished with her hand. (Sorry for the details). Anyway, I started to freak out about the fact of her dental hygiene (I didn’t see) and if there was the possibility she had blood in her mouth (everything seemed okay). In the moment, I thought she was more protecting herself from
me. When it was done, she used some alcohol for sanitizing. I did wash myself off with soap and water and did not notice any skin breaks and I’m pretty certain the head of my penis was covered by the plastic wrap the entire time (which was not long). But then again, I don’t know if I can consider that a safety precaution. Anyway, it’s been about 3 weeks and I have an abundance of guilt over such a foolish choice. I’ve read that this is a fairly low risk of HIV. But I still can’t get my mind to rest. Hoping for some encouragement and peace of mind. Thanks.

[Jim Allen]

Hello Poz community,
I discovered this forum and am hoping for some good advice while I wait in what I believe to be a liminal space.

Here is my situation:
Stupidly, I received oral from a lady of unknown HIV status. I am typically very clean but had a lapse of judgement. In the moment, the lady produced plastic wrap and I guess I figured that was good. There was one time where she had to re-wrap around the base of my penis and then shortly after she just tossed the plastic and finished with her hand. (Sorry for the details). Anyway, I started to freak out about the fact of her dental hygiene (I didn’t see) and if there was the possibility she had blood in her mouth (everything seemed okay). In the moment, I thought she was more protecting herself from
me. When it was done, she used some alcohol for sanitizing. I did wash myself off with soap and water and did not notice any skin breaks and I’m pretty certain the head of my penis was covered by the plastic wrap the entire time (which was not long). But then again, I don’t know if I can consider that a safety precaution. Anyway, it’s been about 3 weeks and I have an abundance of guilt over such a foolish choice. I’ve read that this is a fairly low risk of HIV. But I still can’t get my mind to rest. Hoping for some encouragement and peace of mind. Thanks.

Hiya

The internet is a small place when you know how to use it. See you had no HIV risk and this has been explained already to you. I'm not sure why you are asking here about the same?

Receiving a blowjob is no HIV risk to you whatsoever.  It lacks all the conditions required for acquiring HIV, and saliva is not a concern as its hostile towards HIV.  Thus it makes sense that after nearly 40 years of this pandemic in terms of BJ's there hasn’t been a single documented case of HIV transmission to an insertive partner (the person being "sucked") and you will not be the worlds first.

HIV is not an issue for you, if what you posted was your only sexual contact in life.

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, every time, no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of HIV protection going forward

Keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please do get fully tested regularly and at least yearly for all STI's including but not limited to HIV and test more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and the only way of knowing is by testing.

Kind regards

Jim

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[Jim Allen]

I am typically very clean but had a lapse of judgement.

BTW - Having a sex life or getting a blowjob does not somehow make you unclean. It's perfectly healthy to have sex.

[justmesw]

Jim,
I guess I posted here because this incident is something I don’t have many people I am able to discuss with. And I am a very talkative person. Also, I also just wanted to hear some reassurance about how HIV can be transmitted. I’m really work through my decision. I regret not taking a safer approach with a stranger. But I’m happy to hear I doesn’t sound like I put myself at risk for this encounter. I am learning from this and practice safe sex in the future. Thank you for your gracious reply. Hope you health!

[justmesw]

Hey Jim,
I know I am probably being way to anxious. But I found this on the VeryWellProject website about HIV transmission and I’m wondering what your thoughts are on it. “ Receiving oral sex: Having your genitals licked, sucked, or bitten is less risky than giving oral sex. However, you can get HIV from your partner, especially if your partner has bleeding gums, mouth ulcers, or gum disease.” Reading this made me anxious again about my situation. Thanks for the insights.

[Jim Allen]

Look plenty of sites rely upon outdated options or CYA (Cover your ass) work instead of up-to-date and basic proven biological facts.

I can't really comment on why that is. It's the same school of thought that causes some sites to still claim shaking hands and eating with the same utensils could be a risk when it's long been disproven.

Finally move on with your life. Stop Reading outdated nonsense online. Use condoms for any intercourse and test out of standard routine at least yearly for HIV and far easier to aquire STI's.

Receiving a blowjob is no HIV risk to you whatsoever.  It lacks all the conditions required for acquiring HIV, and saliva is not a concern as its hostile towards HIV.  Thus it makes sense that after nearly 40 years of this pandemic in terms of BJ's there hasn’t been a single documented case of HIV transmission to an insertive partner (the person being "sucked") and you will not be the worlds first.