Yankees are coming .

[Jeff G]

I have graciously extended an invitation to Mitch to come visit and he has accepted it .
I am a progressive and didn't even get queasy at the thoughts of having a Yankee in my house and I don't care what the neighbors think ... even though I think he can pass if he keeps quite around them . I just hope he don't bring any of that Katherine Hepburn bobble head virus with him .

If any one is in the area July 11 - 15 please come by for a visit and meet Mitch .
I'm already planning activity's for him . http://www.redmountainpark.org/zip-line-trips

When Jan and Jen were here we did this Zip line and its a blast .

 
   

[mitch777]

WUT? He's trying to kill me!

[Dan0]

WHY am I getting this visual of Auntie Mame visiting Peckerwood Plantation and Mother Burnside?  Will there be a hunt??

[Jeff G]

WUT? He's trying to kill me!

Jan was not to sure about the zip line but had a great time after one go . You zip to about 6 or 8 tree houses so it takes awhile . Poor Jan ... the look of terror as she got closer and closer to the tree house was priceless .

[mitch777]

Jan was not to sure about the zip line but had a great time after one go . You zip to about 6 or 8 tree houses so it takes awhile . Poor Jan ... the look of terror as she got closer and closer to the tree house was priceless .

This must be the standard Alabama guest tour? Scare them sh*tless so they never return again?

That rope bridge in the video looks like fun. I will be following your lead. It's a trust issue now.

[mitch777]

Thinking it might be like this:

http://www.magiccabin.com/active-play-toys/brand-44-40-foot-zipline-with-seat-kit.htm

Right?
Anywho, I'm headed outside to practice walking the rope... on the lawn.

[Jeff G]

One of my fave Jan stories from her visit . Jan's husbands response to her hijinks and stories are to simply say For Fuks sake Jan . She Skyped him while she was here and he didn't realize I was near and when he asked her where are you now, she told him in Alabama and his reply was ... For fuks sake Jan, better check the sheets for eye holes . 

[anniebc]

One of my fave Jan stories from her visit . Jan's husbands response to her hijinks and stories are to simply say For Fuks sake Jan . She Skyped him while she was here and he didn't realize I was near and when he asked her where are you now, she told him in Alabama and his reply was ... For fuks sake Jan, better check the sheets for eye holes .

LOL...we tried to get him a private number plate that read "4 F SAKE" on it but they said it was too rude and didn't give us one.

Mitch, you will love the Zip lining, wish I could be there with you all.   I remember screaming "for Christ sake catch me" a few times as I was zooming towards a couple of fekkin big trees. 

Jeff is the perfect host so I know you will have lots of fun.

Aroha
Jan

[BT65]

Mitch, will you be taking the kitties? lol (inside joke)

[Jeff G]

Mitch, will you be taking the kitties? lol (inside joke)

I will buy a python ... a very big python .

[BT65]

I will buy a python ... a very big python .

Well, when I visit, I will be bringing my kitty.  And my kitty is bigger than your python and will eat it!

[Jeff G]

Well, when I visit, I will be bringing my kitty.  And my kitty is bigger than your python and will eat it!

I concede ... I bet you have a huge kitty that has gobbled many a huge snake . 

[mitch777]

Thinking the kitty surprise might not be the way to go unless Betty comes with hers first.

Thanks Jan. lol. I'm not worried about the host but now you have me worried about the trees.

 

[zach]

turncoats and carpetbaggers, the only good yankee is a dead yankee. this war won't last a month

[Jeff G]

turncoats and carpetbaggers, the only good yankee is a dead yankee. this war won't last a month

Zack ... where are your manners . They can't help it that god hates them and made them be born above the Mason-Dixon line .... its like satin scratched a mark across the USA .

All kidding aside ... when I was a little kid I had a cousin who married a guy from Ohio and it ruffled a few feathers in my moms extended family . I asked my dad about it and he shook his head and said son , don't pay any attention to all that nonesense and I also vaguely remember that was the first time I heard the phrase you can't fix stupid when I snooped in when my parents were discussing how silly it was .

This was a southern town where people still rode mules to town up until the early 70's .

[zach]

i was 16 before i crossed the line

[tednlou2]

Reminds me of the Golden Girls episode, where Blanche is trying to become a member of The Daughters of the Old South.  The group learns she's part Yankee (part Jewish to top) and a member passes out.  GG fans will know the episode. 

[BT65]

I do know that Golden Girls episode, Ted, lol.

I moved down South (Tuscaloosa, Alabama) twice when I was in my 20's.  The second time, my daughter was old enough to be in kindergarten.  There were some very foolish remarks made about her ethnicity (1/2 Hispanic, Jeff knows what they were), and I promptly moved back North.  I remember being absolutely shocked.  And I vowed never to move back South (and I never did).

[Theyer]

Sulking
Want to Play to



I guess, no I do not I surmise that Brit,s are , wait a minute I have an argument for and against in my head therefore this is now a ? where are Brits in this line placing xenophobia charming custom .

And who will be who in this Golden Girl thing.

Blanch

[Jeff G]

Sulking
Want to Play to



I guess, no I do not I surmise that Brit,s are , wait a minute I have an argument for and against in my head therefore this is now a ? where are Brits in this line placing xenophobia charming custom .

And who will be who in this Golden Girl thing.

Blanch

You are more than welcome to come and play too .... I will even start a The British are coming thread in your honor .

[Theyer]

I thank you , sadly Denistry seems to be my main Summer activity, which when i think about it is a good precursor to visiting the land off Dental Brilliance.

[Jeff G]

I thank you , sadly Denistry seems to be my main Summer activity, which when i think about it is a good precursor to visiting the land off Dental Brilliance.

Teeth are not required to visit my state ... just saying .

[wolfter]

Teeth are not required to visit my state ... just saying .

Isn't that an obvious observation south of said Mason/Dixon line?   

You all will have a blast.  Mitchypoo is great company.  Just don't count on his navigation abilities....even if he uses that dang contraption that almost caused me to miss my plane. 

[Jeff G]

Isn't that an obvious observation south of said Mason/Dixon line?   

You all will have a blast.  Mitchypoo is great company.  Just don't count on his navigation abilities....even if he uses that dang contraption that almost caused me to miss my plane. 

He can sit in the back seat and I will chauffeur him around .

[mitch777]

Y'all, I reckon I may be needin' a Alabama Rosetta Stone class before my visit. Someone coming from up yonder like me might not know what in tarnation to say to those in the holler when it comes to something simple like placing an order of vittles like taters or maters.

[Jeff G]

Y'all, I reckon I may be needin' a Alabama Rosetta Stone class before my visit. Someone coming from up yonder like me might not know what in tarnation to say to those in the holler when it comes to something simple like placing an order of vittles like taters or maters.

Just remember ... when a southerner gives you a big smile and says bless your heart you have not been paid a complement and they are not showing concern ... you have been dissed ! . 

[mitch777]

Just remember ... when a southerner gives you a big smile and says bless your heart you have not been paid a complement and they are not showing concern ... you have been dissed ! .

So what would happen if I smiled back and said bless your heart too in return?

[Jeff G]

So what would happen if I smiled back and said bless your heart too in return?

They would not miss a beat and would reply Aww your so sweet ... bless your little heart .

[Ann]

"Yankees are cumming"

I'm glad someone is having fun!

He can sit in the back seat and I will chauffeur him around .

And you can call him Miss Daisy.

[Jeff G]

"Yankees are cumming"

I'm glad someone is having fun!

And you can call him Miss Daisy.

Im more of a dandelion .

[Ann]

Im more of a dandelion .

You're a weed alright.

[zach]

a weed is but an unloved flower

[Jeff G]

a weed is but an unloved flower

That sums me up pretty well LOL .

[Miss Philicia]

150 years later and you poor souls still haven't recovered from Sherman torching everything.

[Jeff G]

150 years later and you poor souls still haven't recovered from Sherman torching everything.

Mr Peabody put him up to it .

[Theyer]

They would not miss a beat and would reply Aww your so sweet ... bless your little heart .

Then what ?

[intaglio]

Then what ?

They sit in silence smiling sweetly at each other, each sipping their sweet tea until one of them thinks of a topic that will subtly or outright humiliate the other.

"When I was down at the beauty parlor the other day, I ran into Marybelle. She asked about you. She said she's so sorry she just couldn't get your hair color right."

"I saw you carry out just about as much fried chicken as you brought into last week's church social. It must be a struggle for you to get the hang of making it. Maybe you ought to talk to your momma. Her's is always so good."

 

[wolfter]

There was an episode on Southern Charmed where they were discussing the "bless your heart" sentiments.  He said they'll sweetly say "bless your heart" while stabbing you in the back. 

[zach]

i call them church hens... dressed in their sundays fine, standing outside the church after service, smell to high heaven of old lady perfume (all seems the same) and the only thing they do is cluck cluck cluck

but they do put out the food for brunch

[Theyer]

Are the bless your heart women White or Black or both ?

[bocker3]

Are the bless your heart women White or Black or both ?

Bless his heart.......  (translation:  cluck, cluck, cluck) 

 

[Jeff G]

Are the bless your heart women White or Black or both ?

They are of all shades and often shady .

[Miss Philicia]

I always loved the Church Ladies -- all you had to do was tell them you wanted to be a preacher when you grew up and they'd be eating out of your hands forever. I'm sure I was doing this by the age of five. I was quite popular with all of them.

[Jeff G]

I was always amazed how many men and women at church tried to pimp out their daughters to me practically insisting you take them out .

When I was about 17 a man at at church I went to called me the his business . He owned an Exon station near Interstate 20 . He told me he wanted me to take his only child and daughter to dinner and who knows, if things worked out the gas station would be all mine one day . I was horrified and thought to myself that your barking up the wrong tree mister because you just asked a fag to date your ugly bucktooth daughter and used the possibility of me having greasy finger nails for the rest of my life as bait ... WRONG .   

[mitch777]

It was hot, hot, hot but we managed to see a few sites.

First up was Vulcan Park and Museum. High on a hill above the city of Birmingham was this statue of Vulcan. I tried to get the best shot I could.


The next day we visited Tannehill Ironworks Historical State Park. A nineteenth century site preserved to show us Yanks where the cannonballs were made to no avail. Tee hee. 1500+ acres of trails and beautiful woodlands.



The old ironworks building was interesting. Loved the stonework.



One of the outbuildings caught my attention.



So, we were walking along the trail and Jeff found an iPhone lying on the path. it wasn't locked so he checked out who he felt safe calling. Aunt Pat seemed like a good choice. lol. He spoke to her and said he would hold onto it until hearing from Christine (?).

A few minutes later Christine wondered toward us asking if we had seen a cell phone. She was pushing a baby in a stroller and her other child, a boy of about 3 years old was following about 30' behind. He was NOT a happy camper! Cranky with tears in his eyes and ears beet red. She called him BooBoo, I kid you not. Off she went with a thanks with the iPhone, baby, and BooBoo. 

Along the way there were exciting things to see. A carp filled swamp with a dock to check it out more closely. Someone had left a few Fruitloops behind and we tossed them in. Thanks Toucan Sam!



When we finally got nearer to civilization we were all parched. The selection was great! Water or water. The trouble was that this damned machine was almost empty and it was like a game figuring out which button to push.



On our way out we stopped to get some fried pork skins.

End of story. 

[wolfter]

I assume you mean pork rinds?  Pork skins...lol

[mitch777]

I assume you mean pork rinds?  Pork skins...lol

That's what Jeff called them and that's what it said on the package. What do you know anyway living in Ohio? lol.

[anniebc]

I have always said, never leave Alabama until you have seem a mud puddle and a Water and Pork Skin dispenser....Alabama at it's best.

Think yourself lucky Mitch, I never got to see them two beauties.   

Aroha
Jan

[mitch777]

I have always said, never leave Alabama until you have seem a mud puddle and a Water and Pork Skin dispenser....Alabama at it's best.

Think yourself lucky Mitch, I never got to see them two beauties.   

Aroha
Jan

And don't forget BooBoo.

BTW- Happy Birthday Jan! 

[Jeff G]

Great Pix ! . I love going to that park . They have a flea market twice a month there with lots of local goods and produce and its spans many acres and you can spend a day it . Its also the only state park in Alabama that makes a profit and it pays the bills for all the other parks as well . When I was a kid I had a great Aunt and Uncle that lived there in a log cabin as the caretakers and they lived for the most part as you would have in 1800's . Johnny cash and many other country stars used to visit them in the 60's and 70's just to sit on the porch and play music with my aunt .