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Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

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Recent Posts

Pages: 1 [2] 3 4 ... 10
11
Do I Have HIV? / Re: Please help blood possible with spit in eye
« Last post by Jim Allen on February 22, 2024, 02:39:09 pm »
Quote
Ok so no risk zero ? Move on?

Asked and answered already.

Quote
Even if the person from high risk country? And
 I didnít know the person was in puplic
 you saying no risk zero? Move on

Asked and answered already.

I'll add that how HIV is or isn't transmitted doesn't change because of a person's nationality, skin colour, etc.

Quote
Also you put
Here's what you need to know to reduce your HIV risks:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse correctly and consistently, with no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV



Was this to say any future? In terms of sexual contact I should follow that you wasnít saying I should do that ie talk to health provider because of my question but it was rather this is risks for anyone is that what you meant there and that you didnít mean this information for my question that I have asked

Yeah, it's general safer sex advice that's included on all threads. So you don't need condoms or PrEP for your eyeballs.

I am telling you to use condoms & consider PrEP for any sexual contact you might have, and if you are sexually active to get an STI screening at least yearly.

Quote
Here's what you need to know to reduce your HIV risks:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse correctly and consistently, with no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV


12
Do I Have HIV? / Re: Please help blood possible with spit in eye
« Last post by Anxious9 on February 22, 2024, 01:57:35 pm »
Ok so no risk zero ? Move on?


Can I ask
Even if the person from high risk country? And
 I didnít know the person was in puplic
 you saying no risk zero? Move on

Also you put 
Here's what you need to know to reduce your HIV risks:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse correctly and consistently, with no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV


Was this to say any future? In terms of sexual contact I should follow that you wasnít saying I should do that ie talk to health provider because of my question but it was rather this is risks for anyone is that what you meant there and that you didnít mean this information for my question that I have asked

yeah the guy wasnít bleeding death in my eye. So I understand what you are saying in terms of healthcare setting


So with all I have asked in this comment its zero
Risk and I should
Move on?
13
Living With HIV / Re: How to deal with rejection
« Last post by Jim Allen on February 22, 2024, 01:39:10 pm »

Hi Jim thanks for your advice. Iím quite sensitive so I guess part of this process is just going to have to be me getting a tougher shell. Itís a little scary to think of disclosing to someone prior to meeting them but maybe thatís the best way to avoid hurt feelings on my side and them feeling blindsided and have to process the information publicly on theirs. Do you use dating apps? Thatís what I have been on and am definitely nervous about broaching the subject before they know me a little better.

No, I've never used apps for dating. When I was younger we had chatrooms for that and to some degree forums.

Understand the idea of apps and also that you wish they would get to know you first before sharing your HIV status, but they are not really getting to know you on apps, they get to know your "online persona" ... nobody is really real online.

...  I also think waiting to tell them just opens you up to time wasters and getting hurt, but that's just my thought. However, do keep trying, don't let it get you down and you will find what works for you.

14
Living With HIV / Re: How to deal with rejection
« Last post by pozwoman28 on February 22, 2024, 01:31:49 pm »
Hiya.

Sorry to hear this is getting you down and that the one guy said it was "too much" Sounds like a prick and you are better off without him. As for the other guy, it's unclear why he isn't interested unless he said, "HIV eww!" or something.

It only three dates and I know a lot of us tend to think all rejection is due to HIV status, as that's on our mind but try to keep in mind dating regardless of HIV status comes with rejection, it's simply always the possible outcome when dating and it's a part of life, be kind to yourself, pick yourself up and try again. 

I can only speak from my experince but as a guy, women reject us all the time  ;D. I've been rejected because I have kids, too fat, too skinny, too tall, or not tall enough, being generally difficult (I am) .... As for more HIV-specific rejection, I have to say I've had a few polite "No thank you" over the years but that's only the odd one or two people over the decades, generally nobody cared after I explained it and it did not get in the way of my dating or sex life that has otherwise been good.

I always told them before the first date or if it was a chance meeting then I told them straight out.

That way I weed out anyone who simply can't cope with it so I don't waste my time on them.

They are not rejecting you, how could they as they don't know you? You are more than just a person living with HIV. So try not to take it personally. I know that's easier said than done, but try to keep in mind it's their flaw, you are better off knowing sooner rather than later and you can then move onto the next without wasting too much time or heartbreak.

Prehaps too much info. Why even go into explaining PrEP? That would make me think I need it despite you telling me the virus is suppressed..

Took me a while to find a way that works for me, brief and straight out and then wait for questions is what I find works. I normally say something like

"I have a manageable health condition controlled by meds meaning I am healthy and happy ...... it's HIV and as my meds suppress the virus I can't pass it on during sex" 

Anyhow, keep trying, and don't let a few bumps in the road whilst dating get you down.  ;) Hugs.


Hi Jim thanks for your advice. Iím quite sensitive so I guess part of this process is just going to have to be me getting a tougher shell. Itís a little scary to think of disclosing to someone prior to meeting them but maybe thatís the best way to avoid hurt feelings on my side and them feeling blindsided and have to process the information publicly on theirs. Do you use dating apps? Thatís what I have been on and am definitely nervous about broaching the subject before they know me a little better.
15
Living With HIV / Re: How to deal with rejection
« Last post by pozwoman28 on February 22, 2024, 01:23:01 pm »


               ojo.           Hello there!Ö Welcome to the forums. I will let somebody else to reply to your post, because is something that we all deal with it differently. in my case , when I was diagnosed, I was living with my partner, who is HIV negative and he stayed with me after my eight diagnosis. We lived together seven more years after my DX. I still talk to him and I asked him why he stayed with me and he told me because he loved me. So I think that you have to find the right one before you tell him your status, There are a lot of people who the who disagree with me, but this is my humble opinion. You have to love yourself first. Otherwise, the rejections will bring you down.Ö Wishing you the best and please keep us posted.Ö Hugs


Thanks Tony. Itís tough and nerve wracking. Iím very sensitive in general and take everything to heart. I work a lot on self love and in theory I thought I would be able to handle rejection but when it happened in reality it brought me back to a really dark spot. Thought I was over that hump but I guess just gotta keep putting one foot in front of the other. Thank you for your kind words Iíll be sure to update if anything notable happens or if I decide to date again.
16
Forums Gatherings / Re: Monthly Virtual Gathering
« Last post by Jim Allen on February 22, 2024, 12:19:23 pm »
Anyhow... Good luck finding some underwear and I hope the clinic visit is uneventful.
17
Forums Gatherings / Re: Monthly Virtual Gathering
« Last post by Jim Allen on February 22, 2024, 12:17:20 pm »


18
Forums Gatherings / Re: Monthly Virtual Gathering
« Last post by leatherman on February 22, 2024, 11:47:06 am »
So do you answer forum posts in the nude?
no, no. this isn't "that" kind of forum. LOL Sweats. I live in sweat pants....and that explains the commando situation. ROFL
19
Forums Gatherings / Re: Monthly Virtual Gathering
« Last post by Jim Allen on February 22, 2024, 11:40:31 am »
Quote
welp, it's time to finish getting dressed. I need to put on jeans and some underwear that I look good in.

 :o ... So do you answer forum posts in the nude? Another topic for the call.

20
Forums Gatherings / Re: Monthly Virtual Gathering
« Last post by leatherman on February 22, 2024, 11:15:45 am »
Sounds great!

hearing whats going on with you.
right now I'm drinking water. yuck. but the visit to the doc is coming up in a couple of hours and i need my blood to flow for that blood draw.

Of course, water will help for the pee test.  ::) But that's a tricky one. You have to time it out for the "maybe pee before you take the 50 drive to the doctor's office" to the "keep drinking water during the ride for the fluid tests coming up" vs. the "can i wait to pee now at the office until I get to the lab, or do I need to piss so badly, I'll risk going as soon as I get into the office".  ;D ;D ;D

welp, it's time to finish getting dressed. I need to put on jeans and some underwear that I look good in. :) You never knew when you might end up with your pants down at the doctor's, and they usually would rather have you in underwear than finding out you go commando. :o  8) LOL
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