Cant think clearly now..

[alderich]

Dear Sirs,

I am developing anxiety symptoms now as I just heard a disturbing news just the other day..

I had sex with a guy a month ago who died 3 days ago..and the cause of death was pneumonia. But according to some, it was AIDS so now Im really scared..To be honest, I did threesome then but I only allowed myself to be orally sucked(meaning I was the one being reciprocated--being sucked) and we kissed. Knowing that this is no risk, but I still am having sleepless nights on the kissing thing and the blowjob I had from him. I read that kissing is safe sex, and it would take about 8 gallons for the saliva to be infected..which is impossible to consume by a human..but also if you have bleeding gums and the other guy is bleeding then there is a risk as well. I kissed him but I didnt feel any bleeding, on my part and on his part. With the oral sex, I knew that I didnt have any open cut on my organ then...but I cant be sure.

I want to get tested ASAP but I know the window is at 3 months. Can I already do that by next week? Before we did sex, I even told him that Im into safe sex so I just did kissing and him sucking me. But because of this disturbing news that he passed so quickly(he didnt have any Kopliks spot, and he was on the fit of health when he passed away..it lead me thinking if he had AIDS and didnt disclose it). SO now I am really really scared and I cant shake it off my mind..

He was the last guy I had sex, and its been around 5 weeks since we did it. so I want to have myself checked if possible in the 6th week just to have a little peace of mind...I know it would be inconclusive yet on the 6th week but my anxiety is killing me now.

Thanks for listening.

[RapidRod]

At not time were you ever at risk.

[Andy Velez]

Yes, it is scary when someone you have been intimate with recently dies. However, in the entire history of the HIV epidemic not one man has ever been confirmed to have been infected through getting a blowjob. Nor from kissing. You aren't going to make history by becoming the first.

You are worrying needlessly and without any basis in HIV science. There is no need for testing so give it up and get on with your life. And make sure that if you get around to having either vaginal or anal intercourse, whoever is the insertive partner is always wearing a condom. That way you will be well protected against HIV.

[alderich]

thanks for the response sirs..

To be honest I am in the medical profession so I have been reading but HIV is a complicated matter, and I am still scared. Thank you for the response andy velez, he was someone I wanted to date actually, more than sex, to have a relationship then I was surprised he passed away so soon. So now the rumors are he died of AIDS, which I cannot confirm.

[Matty the Damned]

thanks for the response sirs..

To be honest I am in the medical profession so I have been reading but HIV is a complicated matter, and I am still scared. Thank you for the response andy velez, he was someone I wanted to date actually, more than sex, to have a relationship then I was surprised he passed away so soon. So now the rumors are he died of AIDS, which I cannot confirm.

The rumours about what may have killed your sexual partner are irrelevant. All that is irrelevant in terms of HIV is that you had safe sex.

You don't need to be tested. Go and get on with your life.

MtD

[Andy Velez]

I have to disagree with you about HIV being a "complicated matter." At least as far as the risk for sexual transmission of HIV it's not complicated at  all. It's simply about using condoms consistently for vaginal and anal intercourse. And you as a self-identified member of the medical profession ought to know that.

And that is HIV-science based fact and not "rumor." You have absolutely no basis for concern about your recent incident as you have reported to us. Period.

[alderich]

thanks for the responses.

Its been a scary ride for me since I know in our country there is a huge number of statistics now with HIV cases just reported recently so I was alarmed here. Even though I am in the medical profession, I am still getting feedbacks from the experts...and I am also a scared "human being" like the others here. Its a little bit complicated since I was reading some forums as well and they tell me that theres 1% or 2% risk for oral sex if youre the one doing it..anal more often..

I am also wondering if I get tested now sirs, since I had 4 partners just this yr since January(all safe as I can recall), would it be inconclusive for those 4 encounters to show up if I have it or not? I just want to take the test for peace of mind, as I have different sexual partners and am scared as well for the consequences..

[Andy Velez]

Having different partners is not in itself a risk for HIV. It's what you DO with those partners and specifically if any of the intercourse, (vaginal or anal), was unprotected. As long as you always use condoms you will be well protected.

I strongly recommend that you stop surfing the net about HIV because you will absolutely find comments that will unnecessarily feed your worst fears.

Get tested if you must for your peace of mind. Based on what you have reported of your activities I certainly expect your test result will be negative.

[alderich]

thank you for the uplifting words andy and i hope so too..