DO I TRANSMIT HIM HIV?

[anonyme2022]

Hello, so I am a 22 year old female living with hiv for a year now. I met someone a few weeks ago and we started spending the night together (we just slept, cuddle nothing more) but I was sweating a lot during the night and I think I drooled on his arm. Is he in danger of contracting HIV?

Also, last night we rubbed against each other. We were both naked but there was no penetration...I am scared and I am anxious that I contaminated him since I was really wet.

Also, since we started "seeing each other", I can't bring myself to kiss him because of my fear of transmitting the virus. I read that there is a chance of transmitting through kissing... I had depression for months so I didn't take my meds regularly, now I'm doing my best to be undetectable.

[Jim Allen]

Hiya,

Considering the question type, I've moved this new thread to "How can I prevent HIV"  Here, only a few authorized members will reply and answer questions.

I was sweating a lot during the night, and I think I drooled on his arm. Is he in danger of contracting HIV?

Saliva is hostile towards HIV breaking down the receptors needed to pass on HIV, and HIV is also fragile and degrades once exposed outside the body to the environment, in addition, this concern lacks a route for HIV to be passed on, and sweat doesn't contain viable HIV either.

Also, last night we rubbed against each other. We were both naked but there was no penetration...I am scared and I am anxious that I contaminated him since I was really wet.

This isn't an HIV concern either, again it's exposed outside the confines of the human body and presuming you are a cis woman the fluids produced when excited are a lubricating fluid that doesn't even contain viable HIV.

Sexually HIV is acquired inside the confines of the human body, for example, during condomless intercourse.

I can't bring myself to kiss him because of my fear of transmitting the virus.

Kissing isn't an HIV risk either, so you are not going to pass on HIV by kissing him.

I had depression for months so I didn't take my meds regularly, now I'm doing my best to be undetectable.

It's great that you have started to take your medication regularly again, ideally you should see your HIV healthcare provider as soon as possible and inform them of the skipped doses.

There is a risk depending on how much you have been skipping, that the virus could have become resistant to the medication, and knowing your viral load and when it becomes UD could also be important.

Once you have become UD and then maintain that suppressed viral load through treatment for 6+ months and then continue to take your meds, you will be unable to pass on HIV.  See details here: https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=71848.0

I wish you well and do keep us posted with your lab results once you have them and also just on how you are doing in your original thread: https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=76788

Best, Jim

[anonyme2022]

Hiya,

Once you have become UD and then maintain that suppressed viral load through treatment for 6+ months and then continue to take your meds, you will be unable to pass on HIV.  See details here: https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=71848.0

I wish you well and do keep us posted with your lab results once you have them and also just on how you are doing in your original thread: https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=76788

Best, Jim

THANK YOU SO MUCH Jim, I feel less anxious...and yes, I am a cis woman...One last question please, if I am undetectable, am I still obligated to tell my partner/sexual partner that I have HIV? I did not engage in any sexual activity after my diagnosis
I just start learning to live with this virus (like taking my meds regularly, deal with the depression etc) and I just met this great guy. But I can't bring myself to do anything with him even kissing after the "frottage" accident...and I don't see myself telling him about my hiv status either

[anonyme2022]

Hiya,

Once you have become UD and then maintain that suppressed viral load through treatment for 6+ months and then continue to take your meds, you will be unable to pass on HIV.  See details here: https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=71848.0

I wish you well and do keep us posted with your lab results once you have them and also just on how you are doing in your original thread: https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=76788

Best, Jim

THANK YOU SO MUCH Jim, I feel less anxious...and yes, I am a cis woman...One last question please, if I am undetectable, am I still obligated to tell my partner/sexual partner that I have HIV? I did not engage in any sexual activity after my diagnosis
I just start learning to live with this virus (like taking my meds regularly, deal with the depression etc) and I just met this great guy. But I can't bring myself to do anything with him even kissing after the "frottage" accident...and I don't see myself telling him about my hiv status either

[Jim Allen]

if I am undetectable, am I still obligated to tell my partner/sexual partner that I have HIV?

As in legally? It depends on where you live. I posted some information the other day: https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=76868.0

Also, the CDC has some information that also outlines that in 10 states, you have to disclose. https://www.cdc.gov/hiv/policies/law/states/exposure

Morally. Well, that's up to you, but I find it's better to share my HIV status upfront; it avoids any issues down the line, if the sex evolves into a relationship sharing my HIV status afterwards could be problematic and sharing my status upfront also filters out people who are a waste of my time.