Author Topic: Well It's Been A Year Today (Read 8063 times)

cubbybear · « **on:** September 16, 2006, 09:38:34 pm »

Hey Guys.

Well today is my first AIDS birthday. Though I know I have been infected for about 5 or 6 years, I was only diagnosed when I went in to hospital because I couldn't breathe and lost a good 60lbs, a year ago today. And what a diagnosis it was.. HIV, AIDS (CD4 35/VL 293,000), PCP, Oesophageal Thrush, Pancytopenia, full on funky rash and more.. A couple weeks in hospital, a couple of blood transfusions, starting meds straight away.. it all seemed to work out. Viral load was undetectable after a couple weeks and has stayed that way, and my CD4 is now 197, if not higher *fingers crossed*.

I've come a long way since then. I've regained my lost 60lbs (and then a couple extra), I used to cry heaps and worry about dying, but not anymore. When I first started meds I used to vomit everyday, and could not stay off the toilet. I swear I had the hershey's from the Abyss. Thankfully no more side effects, and I just pop those orange sustiva pills and truvada, like candy. I've left a relationship of 4 years, and I think that was a healthy thing for me to do at the time, and although I still live with my ex partner (who's negative btw.), we get on better than ever now. The break up wasn't HIV/AIDS related, it was a rocky boat way before that.

I still have my moments and moods just like the next person, but over all it's all good. I am happy to be able to have a life now, and I'm enjoying it a lot more.

I think coming here has helped the most with getting myself sorted emotionally. Meeting people who have been where I have, and are going where I am helps. Many of you guys are very close to my heart, even when I don't get on here much, which doesn't mean I don't think of you any less. And I have my definite favourites, and you know who you are, well I hope you do. I want to thank everyone who's posted in my threads offering support and advice.

Anyway, just wanted to say g'day, and post my 1 year HIV/AIDS diagnosis birthday post. It would have been a much bumpier ride without these forums and the people in them.

Love ya's all.
Matt

carousel · « **Reply #1 on:** September 16, 2006, 09:51:07 pm »

Blixer · « **Reply #2 on:** September 16, 2006, 10:02:51 pm »

Hi Matt,
Sounds like you have come a long way in the last year. Nice improvement in numbers and it sounds like your health is good too. I've been diagnosed less than a year and it sure did turn my life upside down. I'm just now feeling like I'm getting back into a routine and moving on with life. Best of luck on many more "anniversaries".

GSOgymrat · « **Reply #3 on:** September 16, 2006, 10:10:56 pm »

You've come a long way. The labs are looking good and I'm sure things in your life are only going to improve. Woof!

cubbybear · « **Reply #4 on:** September 16, 2006, 10:18:10 pm »

Hey C, David & Ford thanks for the replies (and the Woof!) haha.

I'm definitely hoping for a lot more onward and upward yet on a lot of levels, I think that trend is happening.

It's all good, I'm just glad to be here.

Matt

anniebc · « **Reply #5 on:** September 16, 2006, 10:38:35 pm »

Big "CUBBY BEAR HUGS".

I know you have had a few bumpy rides along the way and it's been a long ride, but you made it, and with that wonderful attitude of yours things can only get better.

Hugs
Jan

(who love her baby bear)

Jeffreyj · « **Reply #6 on:** September 16, 2006, 11:32:53 pm »

Hope this is the first of many for you buddy. Keep up the good attitude!

randym431 · « **Reply #7 on:** September 17, 2006, 12:16:54 am »

Hey dear Matt
A year for me too this month. I just totally ignored it since I am feeling better than I have in years, maybe even before hiv??? Kinda strange.
You have been thru a lot besides hiv in the last year so its great you seem to be doing great both physically and mentally.

And as to "I still live with my ex partner, we get on better than ever now",
I think I suggested that in a post to you once. Its weird how that works out, being better friends AFTER the breakup than during the partnership.

I'm glad you are still living together. Its like a little support group built in. The fact that you two can live together and be good friends says a lot about you, and your x. You're what we in the midwest call "good people".
Dont be surprised of the good things the future may bring to both of you.

All the best and take care. "Love that picture!!!" (are you flirting with me with that come hither look???)

randy

J.R.E. · « **Reply #8 on:** September 17, 2006, 01:54:48 am »

Hey Matt,

Been thinking about ya, And sending you a big ole bear hug!! ;)These type of anniversaries can have different meanings for some, and you certainly had a rough start, but you are doing so much better now. I am happy that you are able to get along with your X, much better also. Nobody needs any additional stress in their lives...

As far as the mood swings, and those moments, yes I still get them on occassion, but no where near as bad as I did a few years ago. Everything has somewhat mellowed out for me, if thats possible...

All the best to you-----------Ray

Robert · « **Reply #9 on:** September 17, 2006, 02:11:35 am »

Hi Matt...

good to hear from you. I know you've had a tough go at it but it sounds like it's getting better. I remember you tried to go back to work last spring but it was just too soon. Are you working now? Full time? Part time?

As you noted, it's been a year since your dreadful bout with PCP. Only a year. I'm not convinced even a year is long enough to warrant work again. Please take it easy and take your time.

bearhugs...robert

DanielMark · « **Reply #10 on:** September 17, 2006, 05:11:51 am »

Hi Matt,

May your one year birthday be the first of many. It was 18 years ago for me.

I used to cry heaps and worry about dying, but not anymore.

I actually have an appointment next week with the doctor who gave me my diagnosis and a prognosis of six months to live. I think I'll remind him of that just for laughs.

LOL

Daniel

Moffie65 · « **Reply #11 on:** September 17, 2006, 07:07:30 am »

Hi Matt,

Thanks for placing your mug shot back up. Your face and heart have been a pleasant and bright addition to this forum, and I have to congratulate you on the progress you have made over the last year. The physical stuff is pretty much what we all have to go through, but your emotional growth over the last year shows me that you will "Live Long and Prosper".

Keep up the good work, and check in here when you get the time.

In Love, and Support.

blondbeauty · « **Reply #12 on:** September 17, 2006, 07:14:48 am »

Happy aniversary! This is the first one of many, many more! My first aniversary since diagnosis is next month. My HIV is Libra.

skeebo1969 · « **Reply #13 on:** September 17, 2006, 10:52:50 am »

Matt,

This month is a year for me also... 09-15-05 is tattooed on my back along with a biohazard sign. Just my way of having a little fun with something so fucking dreadful and serious.

Oh yea sorry, Happy Anniversary

Tom

Christine · « **Reply #14 on:** September 17, 2006, 01:55:35 pm »

Hi Matt,
Here's to many, many more Anniversaries! Best Wishes to you!
Christine

LatinAlexander · « **Reply #15 on:** September 17, 2006, 05:30:14 pm »

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!!

Alex

Teresa · « **Reply #16 on:** September 17, 2006, 06:23:32 pm »

Matt,

Heres to many, many, more anniversaries!

Hugs
Teresa

Life · « **Reply #17 on:** September 17, 2006, 06:26:59 pm »

Matt, Happy Anniversary full of reflection of where you came from and where your going... Not a year I wana relive myself for sure!!

September was a positive month! A year for me to this month....

Love

Eldon · « **Reply #18 on:** September 17, 2006, 07:14:19 pm »

Hello Matt,

It is always good to hear the news that a fellow member is doing well. Surely it has been rough but down the road it gets even better. Happy Anniversary and I wish you many more as well.

Have the BEST Day!

AlanBama · « **Reply #19 on:** September 17, 2006, 07:19:40 pm »

Hi Matt!

happy anniversary, my cubby bear...I think you have had an amazing journey in the past year. You have made great progress, something that took some of us SEVERAL years to do.

So congratulations! and hugs....

Alan

Iggy · « **Reply #20 on:** September 17, 2006, 08:56:54 pm »

JohnOso · « **Reply #21 on:** September 18, 2006, 04:41:21 am »

Wow, Osito.

You know you are so dear to me. We've chatted quite a bit over these past few months, and you are up there in a select group of individuals. I won't say much more, because i'm private kinda guy.

I will say that you are a very, very special person to me. And you know that (I hope you do anyway

)

Much love always,
Your Oso

eirin · « **Reply #22 on:** September 18, 2006, 05:06:44 am »

Big hugs to you!

And a lot of luck and good health in the coming years!

IzPoz · « **Reply #23 on:** September 18, 2006, 06:37:54 am »

Matt,

Glad to see things are looking better for you!

Keep healthy, keep thinking those happy thoughts.

Be well!

Nadine · « **Reply #24 on:** September 18, 2006, 06:47:11 am »

Dear Matt,

I'm so happy that your feeling good these days!

((BIG HUGS))

jordan · « **Reply #25 on:** September 18, 2006, 07:42:14 am »

Happy Anniversary

I'm looking forward to mine this February 2007.

I'm glad that things have improved for you and now that you've found a groove things are going well.

david25luvit · « **Reply #26 on:** September 18, 2006, 08:37:09 am »

Hey Matt....

Happy Anniversary, Good Buddy. I must say your post touched my heart and whether or not I'm one of your favorites...you're definitely tops in my book. As a survivor of such overwhelming challenges, you have managed to pull yourself up by your boot straps and make a go of it...and I admire you for it. I pray you have many such anniversaries. Best of luck my dear fellow...........You're an inspiration to us all

emeraldize · « **Reply #27 on:** September 18, 2006, 08:47:15 am »

Happy Anniversary to You. May there be many more for you.
Here's to your continuing optimism and health.

aztecan · « **Reply #28 on:** September 18, 2006, 10:57:02 am »

Matt,

Congratulations on the first anniversary! It really is the most emotional, especially when it wallops you the way your's did.

I am delighted you have been a part of my life and, someday, I hope to give you a big bear hug in person. The Land Down Under is beckoning me. Now if someone would just inform my bank account.

(((((((BIG BEAR HUG)))))))

Mark

TugaMan · « **Reply #29 on:** September 19, 2006, 05:12:47 pm »

Hi Matt!

Happybirthday! Mine is going to be in two days. Same days I'm visiting my new doc. Let's keep fingers crossed.
For me... well, i went to the cinema feeling ok (The Hitchhikers Guide to the galaxy) started feeling tired and sick during the film... and went back home thinking i had caught a flu.
After three weeks of "flu" i found out i was seroconverting... oh well i told this story already... but these days are "remarkable"..

Bear hugs!!!

cubbybear · « **Reply #30 on:** September 19, 2006, 08:30:58 pm »

Thanks everyone for your kind words. It certainly seems like september was a busy month for a lot of us. Onwards and upwards for all of us.

big woofy hugs and much love!
Matt

texasguy · « **Reply #31 on:** September 19, 2006, 08:38:07 pm »

Hi Matt,
I remember you from my first days on here. You were so nice and supportive even with all you were going through at that time. I'm not quite a year yet and still somewhat sorting things out. Glad you are doing well and much happiness to you!

bobik · « **Reply #32 on:** September 25, 2006, 02:01:01 pm »

Hey Matt.......

the 2nd year will be easier.........promise!

Glad your face is back, baby!

Coen

kykeith · « **Reply #33 on:** September 25, 2006, 03:32:32 pm »

hey matt...thanks for the post...i "celebrate" one year next month...woo hoo!!!!...but pretty similar situation as yours...glad you're doing better now than then...keith

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Author Topic: Well It's Been A Year Today (Read 8063 times)