Risk assessment. Please help I'm terrified!

[mello]

Almost three weeks ago (10/07/2021) I had sex with a transsexual prostitute. We started with oral sex, which was very vigorous (the friction of her teeth caused me some pain), which could have caused an injury to my penis in which I have several rather superficial arteries. I am not circumcised.

Then we had protected anal sex for a while until I ejaculated, the condom was thrown away immediately. After some time she started giving me oral sex again, my penis felt a bit irritated but I still managed to get an erection, then she put a new condom on me and I penetrated her for a few minutes but without ejaculating; I withdrew my penis which was getting flaccid and she removed the condom and threw it away.

After a few minutes we tried it one last time, she gave me a handjob and then I rubbed my penis against her anus when I noticed a white discharge that scared me a bit but I removed it with my fingers. At that point we had no more condoms so she suggested we reuse the one she had thrown away the second time, I asked her if it was safe to reuse it and if she knew the correct side, she said not to worry and proceeded to put it back on me, when she did I looked at some secretions on the side that was going to come into contact with my penis. I penetrated her for several more minutes without ejaculating. When I withdrew my penis which was becoming flaccid the condom had slipped a bit but I think I was not completely unprotected.

My questions are:

1. If she made a mistake and put the condom backwards, could I have contracted the virus by coming into contact with her secretions through a micro-wound caused by very vigorous oral sex or through my urethra or foreskin?

2. By rubbing my penis against the discharge from her anus, could I have had any risk of infection?

3. How likely is it that the condom slipped or broken without me noticing, causing risky contact?

4. How likely is the virus to be transmitted through micro-wounds on my penis if she had mouth sores when she performed oral sex on me?

5. If she had pre-seminal fluid on her hand and then touched my penis, would this be considered risky contact?

I apologize for this long and tedious post and for my poor English. I would really appreciate your expert response; my anxiety levels are through the roof and the anguish and regret are eating me alive. Since the weekend I have developed several symptoms: sore throat, shortness of breath, intermittent headache, a mouth ulcer, a slight discomfort in the penis, tiredness (perhaps due to not sleeping well) and pain in the liver area.

P.S. This is the first time I have sex in my life.

[Jim Allen]

Hiya,

1,3,4 and 5 - The answer is no.
2 - The answer is not an HIV risk.

Receiving a blowjob lacks the conditions required for acquiring HIV & Micro wounds isn't a route for HIV to start either. Thus it makes sense that after nearly 40 years of this pandemic in terms of BJ's there hasn’t been a single documented case of HIV transmission to an insertive partner (the person being "sucked") and you will not be the worlds first.

Regarding intercourse, HIV can't transmit through an intact latex or polyurethane condom. If a condom fails during the act of intercourse it is obvious and there is no reason to be stressing about intercourse as long as this obvious issue did not happen.

So unless there have been other sexual encounters my advice is to move on with your life, use condoms for any intercourse no exceptions and test at least yearly out of routine for HIV and easier to acquire STI's

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, every time, no exceptions. Consider talking to your health care provider about taking PrEP going forward as an additional layer of HIV protection.

Keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please do get fully tested regularly and at least yearly for all STI's including but not limited to HIV and test more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and the only way of knowing is by testing.

Kind regards

Jim

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[Jim Allen]

reuse the one she had thrown away the second time

Regarding condoms, as said HIV can't transmit through an intact latex or polyurethane condom. However, Condoms can break, though it's obvious when that happens. It's caused mainly by incorrect usage, so use them consistently and correctly to reduce your risks.

Never reuse condoms, although what you mentioned was not directly an HIV concern reusing them does increase the odds the condom may fail during the intercourse asides from increased exposure to bacterial and other easier to acquire infections.
 
Condoms when used correctly can also reduce the risks of STI's. However, the levels of protection for various STIs, depends significantly on differences in how the diseases or infections are transmitted. Some infections (Not HIV) are transmitted primarily by skin-to-skin contact or viral shredding ect which may infect areas not covered by a condom, such as genital herpes, human papillomavirus [HPV], etc. So get STI screenings regularly if you are sexually active and at least yearly.

Use approved condoms, check for a certification mark (FDA, CE, ISO or Kitemark) as it means the condom complies with safety standards. Check the expiry date and make sure the condom is still within date.

Use lubricant, condom safe water-based lubricants makes condoms more comfortable and reduces the risk of breakage. – but avoid oil-based lubricants as they can weaken or break condoms.

As for putting the condom on correctly:

Incorrectly done, the risk of breakage can increase. Place the condom on top of the erect penis and pinch the teat at the end of the condom before you start to roll it down the penis. By doing this, you'll squeeze out any air bubbles and ensure there is room for the semen (cum). Roll the condom down to the base of the penis.

If it's on correctly, it will roll downwards easily. If you've started putting it on the wrong way, take it off, and even if you or your partner has not ejaculated (cum), there can still be semen or (pre-cum), so it's important to try again with a new condom. (More to do with risks from other STI's/pregancy than anything else)

[mello]

Hi Jim, thanks for the quick reply; this forum is great and an invaluable help. Yesterday I did an antibody test and it came back negative, but I know it is not a conclusive result; she says she got tested on wednesday and her last test was in june. I'm still scared because some symptoms persist: sore throat, a slight discomfort in the penis, pain in the liver area, headache, mental slowness. I'm concerned that after the condom was reused it would have some non-visible crack or it was loose and some fluid had entered. Would it be relevant if she had a high viral load at the time of the encounter?

[Jim Allen]

Hiya,

The viral load is irrelevant, it doesn't change how HIV is or isn't transmitted and what you posted simply either does not meet the conditions required to aquire HIV.

On the topic of condoms I've been crystal clear it's not an HIV concern and explained what you posted isn't an HIV concern and doesn't require specific testing.

So unless there have been other sexual encounters my advice is to move on with your life, use condoms for any intercourse no exceptions and test at least yearly out of routine for HIV and easier to acquire STI's

Finally, I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling unwell but let me be clear, your left testicle and right arm could fall off it doesn't change that it's got nothing to do with HIV from this encounter. See your healthcare provider so they can treat whatever is making you feel unwell.

Jim