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Author Topic: What a life I live!  (Read 6252 times)

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Offline Jerry71

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What a life I live!
« on: February 08, 2007, 08:27:53 pm »
OH let me see where do I begin. The past few months I have been trying to make it on what little money I receive each month with SS check and paying bills and rent and living with a pain in the ass. Yes I said it what turned out to be a relationship has turned into nothing but hell. I pay half the rent in this two bedroom here in Kingsport and live with my Ex. But the past few weeks I have been staying at Lisa's and another good friend of mine, I have been living out of a suitcase and just coming here to just wash my clothes.

Well my X finally found someone just last week and the guy is now staying here with us and he has no job and no money coming in on his part to help out. I took the fast way to move out of my familys home to move down here well at first it was great until after moving in and living together bad mistake. Second mistake signing a year lease and getting put into a bad living situation. Third mistake having my X have someone move in and without asking me and then them not even having a job.

So I guess im screwed coming and going what a fuc%ing mess I'm in now.  >:( >:( >:(

Offline RapidRod

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #1 on: February 08, 2007, 08:36:50 pm »
Jerry, let your Ex pay two thirds of the bills. You didn't sign the lease agreement for anyone other than you two.

Offline fondeveau

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #2 on: February 08, 2007, 08:38:21 pm »
Um..just leave.  Its not like they can garnish your SS.  You are judgment proof. 

Offline Basquo

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #3 on: February 08, 2007, 08:41:49 pm »
I'm sorry things are like this for you Jerry. Hopefully things will get better.  Sometimes the only way is up, you know?

Think pansies and puppydogs. Put on rose-colored glasses.  Tell me to go to Hell if it will make you feel better. Just be patient. And post more often.

Best,
Creighton

Offline Jody

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #4 on: February 08, 2007, 08:45:14 pm »
Dear Jerry...I'm sorry things turned out to be a bit of a mess for you...I recall your enthusiasm when you guys first moved in together and things were really looking up...You gave this a try and you are to be commended for that...Sometimes in life things don't always turn out quite as we hope or expect...And now you have another roommate, uninvited and unwelcomed by you, who isn't working to boot, a real albatross around your neck...Try to make lemonade from the lemons you have been tossed...When you left home and the "comfort" of your family you took on a challenge...Just as you took on the challenge of living with HIV...This too shall be a step on the road of life that if you work hard and don't give up will have it's good, even great moments along the way.

Keep on truckin' big guy !!!

Jody
"Wake up to find out that you are the eyes of the world".
 "Try to discover that you are the song that the morning brings."

Grateful Dead

Offline fondeveau

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #5 on: February 08, 2007, 08:51:24 pm »
No, no, out with bad.  In with the good.  Cast off these chains and move!  The only consequences for you - happiness, freedom from stress, etc.

Offline Jerry71

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #6 on: February 08, 2007, 09:27:48 pm »
Thanks everyone I wish there was some where for me to go but right now all I have is in the room that I sleep in when I get to sleep here.

poznoregon

  • Guest
Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #7 on: February 08, 2007, 09:44:06 pm »
Hey Jerry, sorry to hear about your predicament, maybe you can take your name off of the lease and let the new guy assume the remainder of the lease.  I did this once many years ago and it worked pretty well. This might be wishful thinking if he has no money. When I did this I told the apartment office about it and they had no issue with it. They were just concerned with the lease being fulfilled.  If not that I’d at least let the apartment office know someone else is living there and let them take action. Maybe then your ex will step up and do the right thing

Offline fondeveau

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #8 on: February 08, 2007, 11:09:46 pm »
Surely, someone is looking for a roomie??? A boarding house???  Someone who needs some company, companionship, help around the house? 

Offline Queen Tokelove

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  • Smokey the Smurf
Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #9 on: February 09, 2007, 02:10:08 am »
Let's just be honest and say it shall we, you're in a fucked up situation. No need to sugarcoat it. But why should you be staying anywhere else when YOU are paying rent. You should not be living out of a suitcase from Lisa's or wherever else. Not understanding why the ex moved a squatter in the crib. The sex can't be that good and even if it is for now, I guarantee that won't last long especially when you get out of there. While sitting here this came to mind too, since you are paying your share of the rent, why not invite your company over? You have rights, don't put yourself in the position to be a victim. Good Luck...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline fondeveau

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #10 on: February 09, 2007, 08:22:43 am »
"I took the fast way to move out of my familys home to move down here well at first it was great until after moving in and living together bad mistake. Second mistake signing a year lease and getting put into a bad living situation. Third mistake having my X have someone move in and without asking me and then them not even having a job."

Mistake #1: Move back to the fam or find another place to go - move.
Mistake #2: You are on SS and judgment proof - break the lease - move.
Mistake #3: Stop making your ex's mistakes into your mistakes - move.

You aren't trapped by a lease and aren't trapped by a SS check as you can pay 1/2 of the rent anywhere.  You have friends with whom you've been living and yet, like a moth you are drawn back to this bad situation.  Surely, the laundry facilities are not enough of a flame to keep you trapped in this situation.

Maybe, Queen is right.  You are trapped by the man.  But, it can't be love.  I find this whole situation very upsetting as it reeks of abuse, physical or mental, and it seems that life has beaten you down so that you prefer the safety of the devil you know.  Break that cycle!

Offline indyguy

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  • Posts: 260
  • Hoosier Boy Single Again.
Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #11 on: February 09, 2007, 10:14:15 am »
I just wish I lived in TN. Jerry is hot. His boyfriends loss if you ask me. If TN is anything like Indiana Jerry your ASO can assist you with a place to live. You also have a say so in who lives there. Tell your ex that the new guy has to go. If he says no then get with the complex mgmt and get out of the lease. Like the guys said abouve the cannot get your SS. Hope things get better for you.  ;)
Meds doing well so far.

Offline marco23

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #12 on: February 09, 2007, 10:53:05 am »
Jerry,
I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through. You seem like such a nice guy and your ex knows it. I hope you get out of that situation as soon as possible and live the life you so deserve - stress and ex free!!

Good luck buddy!
Don't hide your hurt, pain and feelings inside..for they will harden your heart.

Offline mjmel

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #13 on: February 09, 2007, 11:08:58 am »
"I took the fast way to move out of my familys home to move down here well at first it was great until after moving in and living together bad mistake. Second mistake signing a year lease and getting put into a bad living situation. Third mistake having my X have someone move in and without asking me and then them not even having a job."

Mistake #1: Move back to the fam or find another place to go - move.
Mistake #2: You are on SS and judgment proof - break the lease - move.
Mistake #3: Stop making your ex's mistakes into your mistakes - move.

You aren't trapped by a lease and aren't trapped by a SS check as you can pay 1/2 of the rent anywhere.  You have friends with whom you've been living and yet, like a moth you are drawn back to this bad situation.  Surely, the laundry facilities are not enough of a flame to keep you trapped in this situation.

Maybe, Queen is right.  You are trapped by the man.  But, it can't be love.  I find this whole situation very upsetting as it reeks of abuse, physical or mental, and it seems that life has beaten you down so that you prefer the safety of the devil you know.  Break that cycle!


Now that is some really good advice, Jerry. So, say to yourself, "OH let me see where do I begin to free myself of this mess."

Dan J.

  • Guest
Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #14 on: February 09, 2007, 03:36:02 pm »
Jerry,

Sorry you are having to go thru all this shit. There are ways out of leases. & yes, your disability is protected from judgements. Talk with your apartment manager. Tell her your roomie has allowed another person to move in. Something can be done, you just have to stand up for yourself & I know you can do that.

Anytime you want to come to Jackson, let me know. I'm just a few hours west on I-40.

Dan J.

Offline Lis

  • Member
  • Posts: 604
Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #15 on: February 09, 2007, 07:01:51 pm »
go to the land lord and tell them that you want to be off of the lease because your room mate found someone else to live there. they will give you a paper to fill out, and then they will have the other 2 sign...  you should be lining up another place to live ASAP... we had a situation sorta like this with my son, and it was easier to get out of then i thought. we moved him out, and the land lord took care of the rest!

hang in there!
poz 1986....

Offline Queen Tokelove

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  • Posts: 6,031
  • Smokey the Smurf
Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #16 on: February 09, 2007, 09:26:28 pm »
Fond does have some good points. If you can go back to the fam then that is always an option, if you get along living under the same roof. You would prolly be able to save some money. I would say the same with staying with Lisa, if that is an option. We all make mistakes, Jerry, you learn your lesson and move on. I hope things come together for you soon..
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline Jerry71

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #17 on: February 11, 2007, 08:39:37 pm »
Hi everyone just wanted to say it has been great getting to know most of you. I have to say good bye due to the fact I have no internet service anymore. My Family is not being supportive of me during this time Im going through. I am in the process of finding a new place to live and soon I may be back not sure of yet. Take care love you all. Jerry

Offline Razorbill

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #18 on: February 11, 2007, 09:04:24 pm »
I'm sorry that things took a downturn.  glad your moving out.  Drop by a friend's computer or an internet café and stay in touch.  I hope things get back on track soon.
« Last Edit: February 17, 2007, 01:22:27 pm by Razorbill »

Offline Jerry71

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #19 on: February 11, 2007, 09:34:13 pm »
Lisa if you get a chance to read this Im sending you my cell phone number so you can get in touch with me since the phone and cable and internet has been cut off at my place.

Offline Teresa

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #20 on: February 11, 2007, 09:35:17 pm »
Jerry,

I wish you all the best in finding a new place and I hope you aren't gone from here too long. Try to hang in there.

Hugs
Teresa
Hubby HIV+ 5/5/06
CD4:320
  %: 26.7
 VL: <20
Atripla (started it 8/24/06)

Offline Life

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  • Member 2005
Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #21 on: February 11, 2007, 09:37:51 pm »
Jerry, one thing I think is important for you... Keep in close contact with your friends here, and that means all of us.   You should not do this all by yourself...   Find an internet cafe if you have to, but stay in touch.   Promise?

Love,
« Last Edit: February 11, 2007, 09:40:22 pm by Eric »

Offline RapidRod

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Re: What a life I live!
« Reply #22 on: February 11, 2007, 09:47:34 pm »
Jerry, you've picked yourself up before you can do it again. You've came a long ways, just keep moving on. Good luck guy and if you have to, drop by a library and drop us a line so we know how you're doing.

Rodney

 


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