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Off Topic Forums => Off Topic Forum => Topic started by: WillyWump on April 25, 2012, 11:00:08 pm

Title: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: WillyWump on April 25, 2012, 11:00:08 pm
Some of you know my mom has been fighting Lung cancer for about 2 years now. She's a tough old (66) thing and has given it a valiant fight but as Lung Cancer often does it has spread to her brain. 20-30 Mets, including one large one on or near her brainstem it seems.

Monday night she was having problems standing and was very confused so I took her to hosital, and that is when they found that it had spread.

They've given her some drugs to shrink the swelling in her brain so she is pretty lucid and "with it" for now, which is nice, because at any moment that could go away again. She will begin Whole head radiation on Friday.

It really doesnt get any worse in regards to cancer, it is now in her Adrenal glands, bones , brain and brainstem (interesting enough the Chemo has cleared her lungs completely) but the buggers just keep moving around. Prognosis is clearly very poor. They are saying she has anywhere from a couple weeks to 3-6 months with the radiation. a few days without. She wants to continue on with the radiation so that is what we will do.

On top of all of this^ Mom will have to be coming back to live with me. She's not happy about it and I cant say Im totally thrilled but Im her only child and I will do whatever it takes and there is really no other option. I've tried to have nurses at her house over the past year, but she has kicked them out, not to mention I really cannot afford them full time.

Hospice is potentially in play here, we are just waiting on a firm diagnosis on prognosis from the doc which will probably come tomorrow or friday as they are still running tests.

So for the last few days between being at the hospital all day Ive been trying to get my house in shape to accomodate her. But I must say Im not real sure what to do in that regard. I will be meeting with a hospital social worker tomorrow who supposedly can hep me with home healthcare and getting beds, etc, that I might need.

So much to do and no time to do it in.

I'm up and down. I usually get real down as I drive to the hospital so then I walk in with big tomatoe eyes, but after that I'm usually fine.

On the upside, she has a cute nurse, and mom told me today that he was quizzing her about me. So we had a nice laugh about that. ;)

Wish me luck.

-Will.e.Wump.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Buckmark on April 25, 2012, 11:09:32 pm
Will,

I'm so sorry to hear about your Mom.  She's fortunate to have a good son like you who is taking good care of her.  I will say several prayers for both of you.

Hugs,

Henry
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Jody on April 25, 2012, 11:12:36 pm
So sorry about your mom Will, she is also lucky to have you as you are a wonderful son.  I hope her remaining time will be happily spent with you and your loved ones.  I am also an only child and elder care is tough, like you I try to handle it with patience, kindness and compassion.

Be well friend, Jody
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: anniebc on April 25, 2012, 11:14:03 pm
Hi Will

Your mum is only two years older than me, she is too young to be going through this, I'm glad she has you beside her.  Even though it's not something you are not happy about I'm sure it will turn out OK for both of you, but it sounds like the Hospice will be the best place for her in the long run, if you are out working during the day there is no way you can give her the nursing she is going to need.

Thinking of you both.

Aroha
Jan :'(
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Rev. Moon on April 25, 2012, 11:16:58 pm
Oh Will, this is too bad. She is actually too young to be dealing with so much.

Just letting you know that you and your mom will be in my thoughts.  She is indeed blessed to have you by her side.  Sending you both many hugs.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: GSOgymrat on April 25, 2012, 11:23:30 pm
I'm so sorry your mom is not doing well. Cancer is such a horrible thing. Hang in there.

Ford
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Jeff G on April 25, 2012, 11:25:10 pm
Will , I'm so sorry this is happening to you and your mom . My thoughts are with the both of you . Please remember to take care of yourself as well . BIG HUG .
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Miss Philicia on April 25, 2012, 11:39:52 pm
Thinking of both you and your mother, Wumpy
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: tednlou2 on April 26, 2012, 01:54:38 am
My thoughts are with your mom and you.  Stay strong!  I hate to even imagine this with my mom.  It is encouraging that she hasn't given up hope and still wants to kick some butt.     
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: spacebarsux on April 26, 2012, 03:08:01 am
I'm sorry to hear about this Will. Best wishes and all the strength to you and your mother.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Growler on April 26, 2012, 05:59:09 am
Willy, take care of yourself mate and try to find and share with your mum as much happiness and joy as possible in the time she has left.
GROWLER
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: bocker3 on April 26, 2012, 07:25:04 am
Will,

So sorry that your mom is in this shape.  I'm sure she knows how very fortunate she is to have such a good and caring son.
As you take care of her, please remember to take care of you too!  Get some exercise to help reduce your stress, and please try to eat well too.
Will keep you and mom in my thoughts.

Hugs,
Mike
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: J.R.E. on April 26, 2012, 07:56:05 am
Will,

Sorry to hear about you mom. Keeping both of you in my thoughts.


Ray
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: aztecan on April 26, 2012, 09:21:09 am
Hey Will,

I am very sorry to hear of your mother's turn for the worse. I know this is a difficult time for you and for her.

I will send as much supportive energy as I can muster. You both will be in my thoughts.

(((((HUGS))))

Mark
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Ann on April 26, 2012, 09:55:12 am
((((((Will)))))) Thinking of you and your mother both and sending you strength, positive energy and peace.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: denb45 on April 26, 2012, 10:04:15 am



 Sorry Will.e.Wump.  :(   mothers are special and you only get one in your entire lifetime, do whatever you have to do for her, and I wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you young man  ;)
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: pozniceguy on April 26, 2012, 10:29:11 am
so  sad   Will,  a major  setback  for  both of you.... glad you are able to help with taking her in and arranging care.... lots of  good thoughts and positive energy  coming your way  and a few prayers as well...


Nick
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: LM on April 26, 2012, 10:29:39 am
I'm sorry, I wish you and your mom much strength.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Joe K on April 26, 2012, 12:05:25 pm
What horrible news Will, my thoughts are with you and your mom.  We just lost Stephen's mother and the hospice/hospital staff were excellent in helping to set up her house, so she could go home and die.  Take advantage of their offers to help.  I'm also a only child, so I empathize with all the duties falling squarely on your shoulders.

Please remember to take care of yourself as well.

Joe
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: wolfter on April 26, 2012, 12:25:35 pm
So sorry to read this.  Stay strong and take care of business.  Your mother is very fortunate to have such a caring son. 

Have you considered contacting veterans organizations?  I know VFW's have inventories of hospice needs equipment that they loan out for free.  It doesn't matter if you have a veteran affiliation or not. 

Take care and best wishes.

Wolfie
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Theyer on April 26, 2012, 12:26:33 pm
I am so sorry Mr Wump ,and I am wishing you all the luck I can.Your Mother sounds great,certainly the bit about the fixing you up with the nurse.
michael
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: RAB on April 26, 2012, 01:00:05 pm
Well crap Wumpster.  This is just awful.  I'll keep you and your mom in my thoughts and prayers.

As others have said make sure you take care of yourself too.

Love and Hugs

RAB
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Lugzsoo on April 26, 2012, 02:23:45 pm
Sorry to hear this hope everything turns out good for you and your mom . God bless you both

Hugs to you both
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: thunter34 on April 26, 2012, 07:32:44 pm
Hey, Will.  So sorry about your Mother.  Sending love and positive energy your way.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: OneTampa on April 26, 2012, 08:42:39 pm
Will,

I join everyone in saying that I am sorry to hear of your mother's illness.

I am sure she knows that she has in you a precious son at her side.

Bless you and your mother.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: phildinftlaudy on April 26, 2012, 09:06:39 pm
Will -
I am so sorry to hear this.
Please give your mother a big hug from me.
Also, give yourself one too.
I am sure that it means so much to her that you are there for her.
Enjoy every conversation and your time together with her.
If you do go the hospice route - just know that they are truly angels. They have to be some of the most amazing people I have ever met.
Having been through the process with my dad a little over a year ago - I can't speak highly enough about how they made a difficult situation much more bearable.

I will be keep you and your moms in my prayers and my thoughts.
Make sure you also take care of yourself.
Much love to you.

-Phil
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on April 26, 2012, 11:13:25 pm
Will,

I'm so sorry to hear this.  Sending you lots of positive energy and keeping you in my thoughts.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: BT65 on April 27, 2012, 04:35:19 am
Willy, this makes me sad.  I'll continue to keep you and your mom in my thoughts and well wishes.  As you know, I helped take care of my mum in her last days with lung cancer.  Not a good way to go (but what is).  Hospice is a tremendous blessing, so getting set up with them is great. 

Please take care of yourself, you're going to need all the strength you can muster!
Much luv,
Betty
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: skeebo1969 on April 27, 2012, 06:24:06 am



   I'm sorry to here of your mother's grim condition.  Having gone through this myself with my own mother I know it's not easy.  No words can make it any better...  hang in there Willy.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Matty the Damned on April 27, 2012, 06:25:58 am
Christ Wumpy. :(

Matty the Damned doesn't pray but he will keep your mum in his daily anxieties.

MtD
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: MarkB on April 27, 2012, 04:25:17 pm
Will

My Mum died from lung cancer: I will be thinking very especially of your mother, and of you, where I am.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: WillyWump on April 29, 2012, 08:30:48 pm
Thanks everyone for the kind words and thoughts.

This is tough as SHIT. Mom is now on a rented hospital bed in my living room. She goes from the bed to a recliner, and thats it. I use a wheelchair to take her back and forth to the restroom.

Luckily I have a home health care aAid coming in Mon, weds, fri to bathe and help with grooming.

She fell the other day and I could barely get her up, it's like deadlifting 150 pounds.

I guess she really should be in a facility, but She starts daily radiation tomorrow, and im hoping some of her abilities will return.

Doc and I are going to guage her response to radiation, and then decide on Hospice.

-Will
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: RapidRod on April 29, 2012, 09:39:56 pm
Will, I'm so sorry. I hope things improve.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: forrest on April 29, 2012, 10:02:55 pm
Sorry to hear about this Wil.  It's always tough to know what to say... but thoughts are with you as you go through this difficult time.  Thank goodness she has you! Hang in there!
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: buginme2 on April 29, 2012, 10:10:59 pm
Sorry to hear you are having a difficult time.  Your mother is so fortunate to have you as her son.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: WillyWump on May 13, 2012, 08:04:17 pm
Hi, So an update of sorts.

I had to make the decision to put mom in Hospice a decision that came with great struggle from within myself. But nevertheless she is in Hospice, in a Care facility (read nursing home). I think this is like her 5th day in the facility, after spending 10 days in the Hospital.

Doing well, already surprising the docs. THey were saying "a couple weeks" a couple weeks ago. and she is still very alert even if somewhat confused.

anyways it's tough.

We celebrated Moms day in the "care facility ::), flowers, fresh Oatmeal Raisin cookies, and Sea Island shrimp House takout for lunch. I got her out of bed and rolled her out to the Rose garden, where there were no roses. There were however several of those big apartment style bird houses that were brimming with birds, which mom took great delight in.

I'm doing well mostly, sometimes its very tough but as we know a good cry really cleanses out the soul.

Nayways my cuz is in town visiting mom so I got the night off and thougt I would see if I could wreak some havoc around here with you people

-Will

Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: GSOgymrat on May 13, 2012, 08:17:16 pm
I confess I got choked up reading your post, it being Mother's Day. It reminded me of when my mom was in hospice. There is really nothing I can think to say but that you both are in my thoughts.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: tednlou2 on May 13, 2012, 10:55:23 pm
This is indeed sad all together, but especially on Mother's Day.  It is good to hear you got to spend some time with Mom today and can also get a little break.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Andy Velez on May 14, 2012, 09:56:59 am
Sounds like you and your Mom are doing as well as can be expected in this very difficult situation, Willy.

You can only do your best, angels can do no more.

Hoping that things continue as well as possible for her in the hospice and sending best to you.

Cheers, bud.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: red_Dragon888 on May 14, 2012, 11:20:49 am
I know she is very happy and lucky to have you there by her side.  Hopefully she will pull through and take on the world.  I wish you all the best and a whole lot of positive energy to you, yours and the world.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 14, 2012, 01:10:35 pm
You're a good son, Wumpy -- now return the phone call I just made to you :)
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: skeebo1969 on May 14, 2012, 05:23:15 pm
Hi, So an update of sorts.

I had to make the decision to put mom in Hospice a decision that came with great struggle from within myself. But nevertheless she is in Hospice, in a Care facility (read nursing home). I think this is like her 5th day in the facility, after spending 10 days in the Hospital.

Doing well, already surprising the docs. THey were saying "a couple weeks" a couple weeks ago. and she is still very alert even if somewhat confused.

anyways it's tough.

We celebrated Moms day in the "care facility ::), flowers, fresh Oatmeal Raisin cookies, and Sea Island shrimp House takout for lunch. I got her out of bed and rolled her out to the Rose garden, where there were no roses. There were however several of those big apartment style bird houses that were brimming with birds, which mom took great delight in.

I'm doing well mostly, sometimes its very tough but as we know a good cry really cleanses out the soul.

Nayways my cuz is in town visiting mom so I got the night off and thougt I would see if I could wreak some havoc around here with you people

-Will

Brings back memories of when my own mother was in hospice.  As she lay in bed during her last I remember stepping outside and seeing all the cars zoom by on nearby I-95.  It's weird when one's world stops how so much keeps moving.... doesn't seem right.

Anyways, enjoy these moments and try to take every second in.  It will be gone before you know it and all that's left are the sporadic dreams and fond memories.

Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: OneTampa on May 14, 2012, 07:46:45 pm
Will,

You and your mother remain in my thoughts.

Take care.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 15, 2012, 02:52:16 pm
I just talked to La Wumpella for a good 40 minutes on the phone. He seems to be doing OK all things considered.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Jeff G on May 15, 2012, 03:14:21 pm
I just talked to La Wumpella for a good 40 minutes on the phone. He seems to be doing OK all things considered.

Thanks for sharing ... Willy , you have been in my thoughts .
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 15, 2012, 04:03:50 pm
Thanks for sharing ... Willy , you have been in my thoughts .

Willamina said hearing my high pitched nelly voice completely ruined all of his masturbatory fantasies he had of me. You know, a girl's gotta keep it real.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Jeff G on May 15, 2012, 04:08:43 pm
Willamina said hearing my high pitched nelly voice completely ruined all of his masturbatory fantasies he had of me. You know, a girl's gotta keep it real.

Please ... your voice is all Lauren Bacall from cigs , booze and coke unless its klonny Thursday and then it goes up a couple of octaves . 
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: red_Dragon888 on May 15, 2012, 08:33:35 pm
my condolences...
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: BT65 on May 16, 2012, 04:38:30 am
So sorry to read this, Will, but it seems she's in a good place.  Keep doing what you are, and peace to you and your mom. :-*
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: WillyWump on May 17, 2012, 09:11:58 pm
I just talked to La Wumpella for a good 40 minutes on the phone. He seems to be doing OK all things considered.

Yes, I am actually doing pretty good, dealing with the situation better.

What doesnt kill us makes us stronger, and all that. (didnt Jesus say that)

Mom keeps outliving her prognosis, tough old bat. The nurses keep telling her she is in "rehab", so she keeps complaining that no one is rehabbing her. Over the last few days she has shown an improvement in her condition mentally, kind of like she was "getting better", but nurses say it could just be a rally before the end.

We will see.

-W

ps, thanks again for all t he kind words. and yes, Missp voice wreaks of Nelliness and rainbows.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 17, 2012, 09:21:37 pm
and yes, Missp voice wreaks of Nelliness and rainbows.

You seem rather obsessed with this issue.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: AlanBama on May 20, 2012, 03:37:17 pm
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your Mom, Will.

My prayer is for a peaceful transition.

Hugs,

Alan   :'(
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: OneTampa on May 20, 2012, 06:22:05 pm
Will,

You and your mother remain in my thoughts.

Take care.
Title: Re: Momma Has Taken a Turn for the Worse
Post by: bocker3 on May 20, 2012, 07:32:25 pm
Willy,

A little late here -- just got back from vacation. 

I am sure that, while tough, you made a sound decision for your mom.  Making the tough calls certainly shows that you love yoru momma and that she raised you right.  Know that you and your mom will remain in my thoughts.

Hugs,
mike