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Author Topic: Really worried  (Read 712 times)

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Offline rajk2

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Really worried
« on: March 24, 2021, 12:34:26 pm »
Hi,

I am freaking out here and just needed to lay this all down. Over the past 3 years I have been to a number of massage parlors and I know this forum says those aren't risks since no penetrative intercourse took place there. Masseuses have tried grinding their vagina on my penis shaft, but I try to avoid that as well but can't guarantee that never happened.

I have had penetrative intercourse with women 4 times in the past 3 years - twice anally, twice vaginally. All 4 times I wore a condom and pulled out before coming to ensure that the condom was intact. Each time, I came in the condom and there was no leakage. I am 100% sure of that.

However, one of those times, while having sex, the white emissions from the vagina squirted out onto the bottom of the condom (still covered) and the person i was having sex with cleaned it with her hand. I am worried that white emission might have gone inside the condom while stroking to finish.

Also, I have had unprotected oral sex 10 times over the past 3 years (i was the person being sucked). I know this is theoretically no risk, but still feel crazy over this.

I have had episodes of flu over the past 3 years, and loose motions as well which are seen as signs of ARS according to the CDC and other websites.

I am going to India to be married shortly and am debating whether to get a Oraquick test since I have not had sex or engaged in any massages for the past year due to Covid. But i am just feeling so nervous to actually go through with it as I am scared of the result.

I need some confidence to actually go buy the test and take it because I am just not able to build up the confidence myself. I am planning on a full STI panel as well, but want to tackle HIV first as most of the others are treatable to a large extent.

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Really worried
« Reply #1 on: March 24, 2021, 12:44:24 pm »
Hiya.

You did not acquire HIV from receiving oral sex, also the fluid on the bottom of the condom being cleaned up by hand etc was not HIV to you at all.

As for the intercouse, HIV can't transmit through an intact condom. Getting tested for HIV and far easier to acquire STI's at least yearly would be a good idea though.

Try to relax. Flu is normally the sign of flu or about a dozen other common issues including people thinking a cold is the flu. As for the shits, it happens to everyone and s caused by just about everything and nothing at all, next time you feel unwell just see your doctor.

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, every time, no exceptions. Consider talking to your health care provider about taking PrEP going forward as an additional layer of HIV protection.

Keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please do get fully tested regularly and at least yearly for all STI's including but not limited to HIV and test more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and the only way of knowing is by testing.

Kind regards

Jim

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As a member of the "Do I have HIV?" Forum you are required to only post in this one thread no matter how long between visits or the subject matter. You can find this thread by going to your profile and selecting show own post and it will take you here. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Any additional threads will be deleted.
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
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HIV TasP
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Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Really worried
« Reply #2 on: March 24, 2021, 12:52:18 pm »
Quote
I need some confidence to actually go buy the test and take it because I am just not able to build up the confidence myself.

Knowing your STI status means you can treat them or manage them. Not knowing means not treating them and a greater risk of permanent damage or death. Not sure if that help with giving you some confidence but its better to know through testing.

Quote
I am going to India to be married shortly

Congratulations to you.

Just keep in mind that if you have engaged in condomless intercourse with your partner or do in the future then you are obviously at risk of acquiring HIV.

Often within relationships, condomless sex is based on trust or past test results, however, this does not prevent HIV and any condomless intercourse is accepting the greater risk of acquiring HIV. If you do engage in condomless intercourse consider testing more regularly.
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

Offline rajk2

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Re: Really worried
« Reply #3 on: March 24, 2021, 12:53:05 pm »
Jim,

Thanks for the quick reply. I am 100% sure the condoms were used correctly and were intact. As I mentioned, I pull out before coming to ensure that as well - it is a mental thing so I don't worry later about whether a condom broke during sex. Each of those 4 times, I did that and checked that the condom was intact.

I am just mentally trying to build confidence to buy a Oraquick to check for reactiveness and will definitely schedule and get tested for all other STIs before I go back to India.

Just praying that my stupidity over the past 3 years did not lead to being HIV positive. After marriage, I am going to be 100% dedicated to my wife, i just want this mental torture to stop now.
« Last Edit: March 24, 2021, 12:56:23 pm by rajk2 »

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Really worried
« Reply #4 on: March 24, 2021, 12:56:00 pm »
What you have posted here so far is not an HIV concern. That's all I can tell you.

Best, Jim
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

Offline rajk2

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Re: Really worried
« Reply #5 on: March 25, 2021, 11:47:14 am »
Since most people never post follow-ups, I decided to post one just for confidence for other people.

After Jim's great work at building my confidence, i went out and bought an Oraquick. Followed their directions to the letter, swiped my gums and waited for the longest 20 minutes of my life. It was Negative.

The peace of mind is overwhelming. 40$ is well worth it for the peace of mind afforded by this test. I will be scheduling a full STI panel to check for other STIs soon, but it feels like a huge weight has been lifted.

To anyone else on the forum who is just mentally fraught with questions, you can either buy a home test kit, or i found that there are organizations which discreetly send free home test kits as well in the US. The peace of mind is well worth the money.

Jim, thanks again. Without your push, I might have just been inundated with my bad thoughts for a long time.

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Really worried
« Reply #6 on: March 25, 2021, 12:21:13 pm »
You're welcome.
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

 


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