Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
March 18, 2024, 10:15:11 pm

Login with username, password and session length


Members
Stats
  • Total Posts: 772781
  • Total Topics: 66296
  • Online Today: 328
  • Online Ever: 5484
  • (June 18, 2021, 11:15:29 pm)
Users Online
Users: 1
Guests: 221
Total: 222

Welcome


Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Do I Have HIV?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Welcome to Do I Have HIV?

Welcome to the "Do I Have HIV?" POZ forum.

This special section of the POZ forum is for individuals who have concerns about whether or not they are HIV positive. Individuals are permitted to post up to three questions or responses in this forum.

Ongoing participation in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum (posting more than three questions or responses) requires a paid subscription, with secure payments made via PayPal.

A seven-day subscription is $9.99, a 30-day subscription is $14.99 and a 90-day subscription is $24.99.

Anyone who needs to post more than three messages in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum -- including past, present and future POZ Forums members -- will need to subscribe, with secure payments made via PayPal.

There is no charge to read threads in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum, nor will there be a charge for participating in any of the other POZ forums. In addition, the POZ Basics "HIV Transmission and Risks" and "HIV Testing" basics, will remain accessible to all.

NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum; attempts to post HIV symptoms or testing questions in any other forums will be considered violations of our rules of membership and subject to time-outs and permanent bans.

To learn how to upgrade your Forums account to participate beyond three posts in the "Do I Have HIV?" Forum, please click here.

Thank you for your understanding and future support of the best online support service for people living with, affected by and at risk for HIV.

Author Topic: Still very worried, need advice please  (Read 20588 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Still very worried, need advice please
« on: June 09, 2006, 09:05:08 pm »
Hi, I was just wondering if I could have some advice, I am going crazy.  Over a month ago, I got extremely messed up one night (drugs,drinking,etc.)  I was out of town and had sex with this man I had just met and his friend who was a lesbian.  I also blew his friend on the same night.  There was no cum involved, I had unprotected oral sex with both men and the woman.  NO cum like I said but there was probably precum involved.  I had PROTECTED vaginal sex with the one man but not the other. They also all went down on me. After I got home I started getting very anxious about the incident as it really freaked me out, I had NEVER done anything like this before EVER.  I immediately contacted them and asked them if they had all been tested lately.  They had all been in the last couple of months so that eased my mind a little.  I did get tested a week later  however and everything came up negative.  I then started reading info on the web about the window period and all that and I started to get very very scared again.  I stressed myself out so badly, had about a 3 week nervous breakdown waiting to get retested.  About 2 weeks after that night I developed swollen lymph nodes in my groin and throat.  I have had lymph node problems before (I had been diagnosed with chronic fatigue last year).  I also developed hives all over my body which immediately disappeared within a half hour of appearing.  Had some mouth sores also but I did have a sinus infection and an ear infection and thats why I guessed that I had swollen lymphs.Also a fever that comes and goes. I got retested after 26 days and it was negative.  I calmed down a little, the counselor at the clinic told me there was a slim to none chance that you can get it from oral sex.  Is she right? What if my gums were sore?  I do smoke and sometimes I feel like I have sore gums.  WHat if precum or vaginal fluid got in there? IS that possible for infection? Anyways they all got retested the same week that I did(about 26 days after).  All tests were negative, but what if one of them is still in the window period as well?? what if they are lying?? The one man has an overactive immune system, can that block results???  I dont think they are lying but i dont know them too well.  I know I have stressed all 3 of them out because of all of this because they swear they know they dont have anything.  My PCP also told me that my symptoms were caused by stress and the something would have showed up on my last test if I were infected.  Sorry so long but I just need some help gettin through the next 2 months to get retested.  They said I didnt really need to come back to take another test but Im just very freaked out by the whole situation.  Is is possible that I am infected?  Please help!!!!!! Thanks!

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Might have been misunderstood
« Reply #1 on: June 09, 2006, 09:23:03 pm »
I didn't mean to say that I had protected vaginal sex with one man and not the other.  I DID have sex with the one man with a condom and I didnt have sex with the other man at all, except the oral, he couldnt keep it up on account of the stuff he had taken.  Thats what I meants to say. I did not have unprotected vaginal sex at all. Am I freaking out for no reason? Everyone tells me I am... I just can't get it out of my head ya know... Thanks any advice would be greatly appreciated.  I keep going through the what if's and maybe's. Thanks!!

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #2 on: June 10, 2006, 07:31:16 am »
Still,

You have been given good advice so far. It IS rare for hiv to be transmitted orally. There is only a very tiny chance of becoming infected through giving a blowjob where there was no ejaculation.

There is no way you would be infected from anyone going down on you.

You did the right thing in using a condom for intercourse because condoms are very effective when it comes to preventing hiv transmission.

The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being a mere 22 days. This means that your negative results thus far are very encouraging and should you decide to test again at the end of the three month window period, I am confident you will receive another negative result.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs. If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, please consider your recent tests as the beginning of your annual checks. As long as you make sure condoms are being used, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

You mention you have been tested for other STIs, but with that sore throat you have had, I wonder if you also had a throat swab for chlamydia and/or gonorrhea? While it is rare for hiv to be transmitted orally, it is possible to get other infections in your throat from giving blowjobs. Get it checked out if you haven't already.

Keep using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. Please read through the condom and lube links in my signature line, and check out the links on the left hand side of either of those pages for information on the female condom - they're quite good and also prevent hiv transmission. Please also read through the Welcome Thread for further links and information.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 34,126
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #3 on: June 10, 2006, 08:54:11 am »
Ann's right on in what she has said to you so I am not going to be redundant. I expect you will come out of this ok when you do your HIV test.

However, there is one additional point that was an immediate red flag to me when I read. You were wasted on drugs and drinking when this incident happened. Mixing those things with impulsive sex is a mighty dangerous combination. I can't tell you how many people I've known or have reported becoming infected when in a similar condition.

I don't know what your personal history has been in the past, but if this kind of situation is common for you then you need to get help with addressing it. And even if this was a one-time situation, then it is still a wakeup call to avoid doing it again.

Hopefully you are going to test negative after the waiting period. But you need to remember and learn from this experience. Instead of getting further worked up over every scary thought your mind churns up, stay productively busy during this waiting period and you'll find it can pass more quickly and easily than you may imagine at this moment.

Good luck with your result.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #4 on: June 10, 2006, 05:05:42 pm »
Thanks guys for replying, I really needed some expert advice. No, as I said, I have never done anything like that before I will most certainly never do anyting like that ever again. I am currently turned off by the whole idea of sex at this point now.  It's just not worth it unless it's with someone that I'm going to be with for awhile I've decided.  I'm still a little shaky and trying to put it out of my mind, but it is hard, and I will retest.  I just hate the idea of having to wait all summer to do it.

Can a 6 or 7 week test be sufficient? If so I will go back in like 3 weeks, that wouldnt be so hard to wait another 3 or 2 weeks.  I hope you are right that I will test negative again, as they all said they did.  I just had a bad feeling about the whole situation.  Thanks again.

Offline Morgan

  • Member
  • Posts: 382
  • You did WHAT??
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #5 on: June 10, 2006, 05:23:58 pm »
Still worried,

A six week test would be an excellent indication of your status as the vast majority of those infected would test positive at that time.  You would still have to followup with a conclusive 12/13 week test.

Morgan
Morgan Landers

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #6 on: June 11, 2006, 09:22:44 pm »
Sorry, I don't want to become annoying, as I know the only way to know for sure is to retest at the appropriate time.  I just wanted to ask if anyone knew if it's very possible to test positive after testing negative at 26 days after? I know thats not a very long time but if the average is 22 days or whatever... What percentage of people will seroconvert at 22 days? I am going to go back in a week and a half and that will make it my 6.5 week mark.  I am trying very hard to keep my mind busy with other things, but it is EXTREMELY difficult, as I'm sure you all know.  If this next test is negative(please GOD!!), I will go back at 13 weeks to make sure.  I know that it is very hard to become infected with only precum orally, but it is possible which scares me since I had symptoms, which may mean nothing.  Does anyone know how many case studies have been shown that someone got infected by precum and/or vaginal fluids orally?  Any input would be appreciated. Thanks.

Offline Morgan

  • Member
  • Posts: 382
  • You did WHAT??
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #7 on: June 11, 2006, 09:36:27 pm »
Still Worried,

<<What percentage of people will seroconvert at 22 days? >>

As that is the average..... 50% of those infected.

Your risk is very, very low.

It seems like a lot of what you're feeling is out of guilt or shame for this mini orgy you uncustomarily participated in. 

Forgive yourself for being human, get a handle on the fact that your risk is tiny, and test at six weeks when the vast majority who are infected get an accurate result.

From what you describe, I think you can fully expect to remain negative.

Hang in there,

Morgan ;)
« Last Edit: June 11, 2006, 09:39:09 pm by Morgan »
Morgan Landers

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #8 on: June 12, 2006, 06:45:52 am »
Worried,

Your 6.5 week test result will be an excellent indication of your hiv status and considering your situation I would expect it to also come back with a negative result. Whether you continue to test after that is your call as you only had a very, very slight risk with the blowjob without ejaculation. Your other activities did not carry a risk of hiv infection.

And please remember to make this the beginning of regular, complete sexual health care check ups, at least annually if condoms are always used and more often if not.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline fred

  • Member
  • Posts: 95
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #9 on: June 12, 2006, 07:22:04 am »
I have edited this post as it would perhaps have caused more confusion than it would have solved

Fred. 
« Last Edit: June 12, 2006, 10:14:06 am by fred »

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 34,126
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #10 on: June 12, 2006, 08:12:38 am »
Fred, the point of your thread as well as the source for that listing are escaping me. Please clarify.

In general I don't think it is useful to get into that kind of a numbers game. In terms of the original concern expressed in this thread we do know with confidence that 22 days is the average time to seroconversion. Of course there are always going to be exceptions to that both lesser and longer times to seroconversion. All but the smallest number seroconvert within 4-6 weeks after an exposure to the HIV virus.
« Last Edit: June 12, 2006, 08:14:38 am by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez

Offline fred

  • Member
  • Posts: 95
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #11 on: June 12, 2006, 08:27:36 am »
Andy,

All I was saying was that the average (mean) of a number is not the same as the median.

If the question is what % of anything, it is probably more reasonable to quote the median.

Or indeed better to be vague and say something else

Only trying to be light hearted.

The list was made up.

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 34,126
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #12 on: June 12, 2006, 08:43:53 am »
I don't think it was a good idea to create a list like that.

Unfortunately many of those who are reading these pages might well be inclined to scan that list and not realize it's fanciful.

Your intention is not clear there. When in a state of fear humor is not high on the list for readers.



Andy Velez

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #13 on: June 15, 2006, 01:05:42 pm »
So I know that I just have to retest to find out my situation, but I have a couple more questions first.  All 3 of them have come back negative but now I am worried about the high viral load.  Obviously, if one of them was infected, they would have had a high viral load because it would have to have been a recent event considering all their test came back negative.  How much does a high viral load up my chances from oral sex with exposure to precum only and/or vaginal fluids? Im not so much worried about her because she has only slept with one other woman (hasnt been with a man for years) other than her long time gf and has been tested twice since then.  The one guy wont reply to my emails anymore, not sure what that means... he is the one with the overactive immune system.

 If he is infected, would it take longer for his to show up because of that?

 i had been tested for all other sti's a week after the incident(all were negative), got diagnosed with a bacterial infection, but have had pains in my uterus and pelvic region since.  Could it be possible that other sti's could not have shown up yet either?  I am going back to the gyno today and will ask him to retest for other sti's if he thinks neccesary, just wanted to know what you guys thought.  Im just freaking out again cuz I got a speeding ticket this morning and HAVE to appear in court for it...sorry ridicuously off subject but it just caused me to have another nervous breakdown! As they say, WHEN IT RAINS IT POURS. 

And I understand what Fred was saying, I didn't think that the average would mean 50%. Wouldn't it just mean that some people seroconvert before 22 days and some after and 22 is the average time for it?  Today will mark a day shy of my 6 week mark.  Maybe I will go to the clinic today, after my gyno appt.  I was warned not to get retested under my insurance for hiv again, so i will go to the clinic were its anonymous.  I'm just tired of wasting energy on this.  Thanks, hope to hear back from someone.

Offline LessonLearned

  • Member
  • Posts: 12
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #14 on: June 15, 2006, 08:52:37 pm »
You need to chill out. Your risk was extremely low and you are over analyzing every little thing to death. Sit tight and get a test at 13 weeks and move on.


Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #15 on: June 15, 2006, 10:30:46 pm »
I know. Thanks I needed to hear that.  I just need somebody to kick my ass smack me a few times and tell me to shut the hell up. :)

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #16 on: June 17, 2006, 12:22:52 pm »
So, I'm sorry that I keep asking for advice but here goes... How common is swollen lymph nodes for ars symptoms?  I keep reading that most people just had an extreme fever and flu like symptoms.  I do have a slight fever (99.5) or something when I went to the doctor last week.  I still do feel ferverish mostly during the day, all day.  The swollen lymph nodes are what really scares me though.  2 weeks after that night, the ones in my throat were so swollen I could barely swallow.  The lymph nodes in my groin are still swollen and now I have a lump in each armpit, very tiny though still there and they hurt when I touch them.  I don't know if this is a reaction from stress or if its my chronic fatigue creeping up on me again, but I haven't had a relapse in that for over 2 years.  I'm just still very scared and very worried.  Sorry I know that you dont like to diagnose symptoms. I am going back next week to get retested.  As I said before, they had all come back negative.  I feel like if one of them had it, one of them would have tested positive, but who knows...

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #17 on: June 17, 2006, 01:05:15 pm »
Worried,

It's not that we don't like to diagnose symptoms, we can't diagnose symptoms here. You need to go to your doctor about your glands.

Symptoms or the lack of symptoms mean nothing when it comes to hiv infection.

It is highly unlikely that you would have become infected from anything you have brought to this forum and I fully expect you to test negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #18 on: June 21, 2006, 02:44:00 am »
So, I can't sleep, as I expected...I am going in tomorrow after work(or rather today) to take another rapid test.  This will mark 6.5 weeks since.  Will let you guys know how it goes.  Hopefully everything will be just fine like everone has told me it would be. Blah blah blah I have a broken record in my brain.

I do have a question however.  Does anyone know what the laws are for tattooing and hiv+ clients?  I don't think it's an issue since they don't ask you your status before getting tatooed(on the form you fill out). And I know they sterilize everything in an autoclave so it shouldn't be an issue.  Just wondering if I test positive (I know, I know, but I'm paranoid).Would it be an issue if I did have it?  Just wanting to know cuz tattoos are a big part of my life and I'm just worried about all the things I would have to give up if I was +.  And I'm a straight white female who is only 22 years old.  So I'm concerned about things like ever getting a boyfriend again and having children and yada yada yada.  There aren't many straight males who have it, at least not where I live.  It's not even a concern here, nobody talks about it.

 Sorry I hope nothing I have said is offensive to anyone, I just feel better when I talk about things here and I'm nervous for my test tomorrow.  I know you guys aren't therapists and I'm shopping around for one now.  My doc also put me on Lexapro. It's weird though it just makes me tired and makes me kinda not give a shit about things.  Which may or may not be bad.  It's only been a few weeks though so we'll see.  No nervous breakdowns since though.  Ok I'll stop now.  Gonna try to fall asleep.  Maybe I shouldn't post this...whatever.  Wish me luck tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Best Wishes

Offline jkinatl2

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #19 on: June 21, 2006, 03:10:31 am »
I got my first tatoo three years ago. I have had AIDS for 13 years. The parlor assured me that they used disposable autoclaves, as required by law. They also gave me a free tee shirt, because they liked me.

Now, when you test negative (and I have every faith that you will) you might not get the tee shirt. We all learn to live with sacrifice.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #20 on: June 21, 2006, 11:12:32 pm »
So went to the clinic today, this marks almost 7 weeks and.... it was negative!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I am almost 90% sure that I am ok now.  What are the odds right? 

Anyways though the woman that spoke to me at the clinic today however did not make me feel any better though.  She basically told me the opposite of everything that you guys have told me and what the other woman at the clinic told me 3 weeks ago.  She told me that me 7 week test was not sufficient and that it would just mimic my 3.5 week test.  I was like wtf??? She claimed to be a hiv/aids specialist and said that basically nobody seroconverts before 3 months.  So I told her my story and she also said that pre cum contains more of the virus than actual ejaculation and my chances of getting hiv from oral were a 50-50 chance.  So basically she told me all this bs and I'm choosing to go with what you guys say and what my friends say and what the other lady at the clinic said and by my 3 sexual partners negative results.  She also DID NOT wear gloves when she pricked my finger to get the blood. I'm like what the hell are you people trying to do to me???  :)  Well I'm not going by her word, cuz I don't want to be crazy anymore.  I will go back to get my 3 month test just to be sure.  Even this lady told me that I have nothing to worry about, that it's just nerves.  Any insight????  I'm definately much more lax now for sure. 

p.s. you guys rock sooooooo fuckin hard.  Much love, I probably couldn't have gotten through the last couple of weeks without this forum.  And I'm never having sex again unless he's my bf and he gets tested first!  Holy shit what a weird couple of weeks...

Offline DingoBoi

  • Member
  • Posts: 1,355
  • Bailey's Infected Cream™ Served since 2004
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #21 on: June 21, 2006, 11:24:18 pm »
that 'counselor' is incredibly misinformed and shouldn't be handing out any advice whatsoever to anyone.... not even about a splinter.

the advice you have received here is solid and based upon many studies.   You will find alot of people (even supposed hiv counselors) uneducated about how hiv works and is transmitted, but on this site you can rely on the responses you've been given.

edit: corrected typo of 'sold' to 'solid' to prevent confusion.  This information isn't sold in any manner
« Last Edit: June 22, 2006, 01:28:32 am by DingoBoi »

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #22 on: June 22, 2006, 01:23:44 am »
Yah I didn't doubt you guys for a second!!!

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #23 on: June 22, 2006, 09:05:59 am »


Quote
And I'm never having sex again unless he's my bf and he gets tested first!

Still,

Just make sure one of you is using a condom and you will have no worries where hiv is concerned. If you check out the condom and lube links in my signature line, you can make sure your fella is using them properly. Please also look at the links on the left-hand side of either page - one leads to information on the female condom, which also protects against hiv infection and puts the control over condom use in your hands.

You're going to be just fine. Let us know when you get your conclusive negative result.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #24 on: June 24, 2006, 12:42:30 am »
I'm sorry but I keep searching different sites and everyone says something different!  I can't stop I'm an addict.  Everything hurts again. My lymph nodes are still swollen everywhere... Not just my throat...my groin and in my armpits.  But the armpit ones come and go.  The ones in my groin have been swollen for over 6 weeks now and I still have tremendous pains in my pelvic, lower abdomin and uterus.  Isn't PID a sign of hiv? I have been tested twice for all other std's and it came back negative both times.  I don't know what could be causing this pain.  Also had an ultrasound done and it was normal.  I am hysterical, I can't stop thinking about it.  I don't know if it's leftover stress from the previous few weeks or what... I thought I was gonna feel better after my last neg. but I don't.  I'm more anxious now to wait 6 more weeks for my 13 week.  Cuz I know then if I have it, it's gonna show up.
What are my chances if one of them is positive?  I am not relying on their test results at all.  I am scared to death. I can't even leave the house most days.  I keep reading that people have been infected through precum orally.  If it's rare, why did these people get infected?  I'm having bad joint pains again and feel very tired.  I felt ok for a couple of weeks. Ars symptoms don't work like that do they?  They don't leave and then come back within weeks do they? And isn't PID a symptom of later stage hiv infection?  I read that if lymph nodes are swollen antibodies may take longer to be present in the blood.  I'm starting to doubt what really happened that night cuz I was so messed up.  I know we used a condom but I don't know if it slipped or if he used it properly.  He also masturbated for awhile while I was messin with the girl.  What if he got precum on the condom before he put it on?  My mouth was also really dry the whole time because of the drugs.  What if I didn't have enough saliva to inhibit the virus?  If one of them was indeed positive, is my 7 week test pretty good? 
I'm freeeeeeaaaakkkkiiiinnggg out!!!!!  Everyone tells me I'm fine but I have such a bad feeling still. That counselor at the clinic really messed me up.  I don't want to do this anymore.
I talk to the girl almost everyday and she keeps telling me they're all fine and that I have nothing to worry about.  But I just don't think so...

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #25 on: June 24, 2006, 06:05:17 am »
Still,

When we give risk assessments on this forum, we do so with the assumption that your partner(s) are hiv positive. We have told you that your risk was infinitely small with the assumption that all of your partners in this incident were hiv positive. It is highly unlikely that you would have become infected through anything you did that night. Not one of the whatiffs you bring up change that assessment. You had a very, very, very low risk due to giving a blowjob and that's it. Such a low risk that you didn't even really need to test in the first place.

I don't understand why you continue to check out other sites. Here at AIDSmeds.com we go by the latest, most up to date scientific information on hiv transmission, as well as many, many years of collective experience. Other sites tend to let moral judgements cloud the science and many also don't bother to keep themselves up-to-date.

If you are having tremendous pain in your abdomen, why are you sitting at your computer? You should be making an appointment to be seen by your doctor. I can tell you right now that hiv infection does not cause they type of pain you describe. PID is NOT a sign of hiv infection. PID is caused by bacterial infection and ANYONE can get PID.

I think it would be beneficial if you were to get yourself some face-to-face support in the form of counseling. You are doing yourself no favours by freaking out over this incident, and I suspect your feelings are rooted in shame you may be feeling over exploring your sexuality. You really don't have to be putting yourself through this. You didn't do anything wrong and you protected yourself with condoms.

You are going to be alright, really you are. Get that abdominal pain checked out ASAP. PID is nothing to fool around with, but rest assured it has nothing, nothing to do with hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #26 on: June 25, 2006, 10:18:19 am »
Hi, just wanted to ask you another question about PID.  I though it was most commonly caused by untreated chlamydia or gonorrhea.  I had  bacterial vaginosis immediately following that night and my gyno gave me medication for it, it seemed to go away. I've been to gyno 3 times, he doesn't seem to know whats going on.
My question is...can PID also be caused from bv if it still isn't all the way gone?

Also, what are my chance of testing positive after testing negative at 7 weeks?
Percentage wises, do you guys know how many seroconvert by 6 weeks?
What are my odds?
Thank you for your time.

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #27 on: June 25, 2006, 10:28:01 am »
Thanks for helping me so much Ann. And yes I will try to find a counselor tomorrow morning.  I'm just still very nervous and uneasy, I'm sure everything you're telling me is right.  I appreciate this very very much.  I just need some help getting through to August and you have helped tremendously.  I just keep picturing myself going in there and them telling me that it's positive and that's when I freak out and start asking questions.  Thank you for your time, I will try not to post as much and I will go seek counseling.  I just don't like the uncertainty of my 7 weeks test.  Yes I do feel ashamed of what happened that night but my mind is playing tricks on me.  You are all amazing people and so very strong, I admire all of you. I am mostly just mad a myself, like how could I risk the whole entire rest of my life by messing around with some guys that I will never see ever again.  It terrifies me that I let this fear go this far.  Thank you again.

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #28 on: June 25, 2006, 11:00:42 am »
Still,

PID stands for Pelvic Inflammatory Disease. Anytime you have an infection, you get inflammation. So, the term PID is a catch-all phrase for any infection that may occur in a woman's reproductive system and yes, that includes bacterial vaginosis. Sometimes when one of these infections moves up into the uterus and fallopian tubes, the infection is more difficult to find, diagnose and treat. Maybe the antibiotics you had weren't quite the right ones, maybe you didn't take them for long enough and it is also possible that you missed doses and thereby didn't completely eradicate the offending bacteria. Please see your doctor about this asap.

And just a little tip, if taking antibiotics gives you yeast infections, you can ask your doctor to also prescribe you the anti-yeast medication at the same time. These should be started a few days after you start the antibiotics. I have to do this when I take antibiotics. Ask your doctor about this strategy.

There is very little uncertainty in your seven week test as subsequent tests are not likely to change.

About the shame, stop that right now. You have done nothing to be ashamed about. Chalk this up to a learning experience. Everyone has a right to explore their sexuality and that includes you. Stop beating yourself up for being a living, breathing human being with sexual needs and curiosities. We all have them. We women get a raw deal from society whereby we get labeled sluts and whores for expressing our sexuality. What a load of horseshit. Don't buy into this warped mind-set. Dump the shame overboard before it sinks your ship. OK?

One more thing, next time you find yourself imagining getting a positive result, change the tape, change the script. Imagine yourself getting your negative result, thanking the doctor, leaving the clinic and moving on with your life. You have the power within you to change this script. Do it.

Get that PID taken care of and you'll be right as rain. Keep making sure your partner is using condoms, or try the female condoms out, and you will avoid hiv infection. Really, you will.

And... relax!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #29 on: June 26, 2006, 01:33:46 pm »
Thanks Ann I have listened to your advice.  I made an appt. with a psychologist but she doesn't have availability until another month so I will sit tight until then.  I'm also going to see my regular doctor tomorrow morning about my pelvic pains.  I'm also gonna have her swab my throat cuz I haven't done that yet.  I'm trying to put it out of my head but I'm just so scared still.  My mind is playing trick on me.  I know that most of it psychological now cuz all the data and statistics are pretty much on my side.  I just don't want to think about it anymore, I'm emotionally exhausted. Thanks again, I will follow up and let you know how I am doing, if you care to listen.  Yes I know it is horse shit that us girls get a bum deal with society in terms of sex.  In most cases it's girls who say bad things about other girls and it's just ridiculous.  I will let you know what's up thank you sooooooooo very much Ann and take care.

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #30 on: July 01, 2006, 01:52:10 pm »
Ok, so you guys are gonna think I'm crazy but here goes...  I was on the very end of my period.  There was no blood coming out (ya know on the condom or anything)  Is is possible that since I may have had a miniscule amount of menstraul blood that that would have affected them going down on me?  I know saliva is supposted to be non infectuous but I just though about that.  It's the other way around right?  I mean if I was infected prior then my infected menstraul blood would have gotten into their mouth and then infected them correct?  Which I most certainly was not prior and hope I still am not.  Just nervous for my next test.  My doc put me on cipro for my pains.  Seems to be working.  Thanks ANN!!  She also said I have a zero percent chance of testing positive after testing negative after 7 weeks since my immune sysytem is already low cuz of chronic fatigue.  She said it would of shown up faster.  ANY thoughts??

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #31 on: July 04, 2006, 04:37:14 pm »
I was just reading what tachyon had said about chronic fatigue syndrome and I have it myself.  My doc (was diagnosed over a year ago) said that since I have chronic fatigue antibodies would show up sooner in my blood (with my 7 week test). 
I was hoping this whole time that my lymph node swelling was a reaction of the stress and that my chronic fatigue was coming back.  All of my symptoms can be traced to pre existing conditions that I already have.
I too am worried that I will get a false positive on my next test if they detect chronic fatigue but since you say it's not possible I will stop worrying.
I have panic attacks every morning still and my therapy appt. is still so far away.]
At this point I don't even care if I have it I just want to know for sure so I can figure out what I'm gonna do with myself.   I'm very uneasy.  It's nobodys fault, these things happen.
Nobody should have to live with this disease.  It makes me so sad to think of the world that we live in today: War, hatred, discrimination, racism,sexism,violence,frat boys!,suicide, that god damn George W., bans on woman's rights, disease and sickness of every sort imaginable, animal abuse and factory farming (I'm a vegan).  So on and so forth.
That's all that I have to say about that.  Please don't think that I am crazy(everybody else does).

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #32 on: July 04, 2006, 04:39:38 pm »
When I was first diagnosed with chronic fatigue btw, they also tested for hiv.  I was like what??? I was with my steady boyfriend and the thought never occured to me.  Of course the hiv test was neg. and the chronic fatigue was positive.  So I should have no worries about that on my next test then right? just making sure...

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #33 on: July 04, 2006, 05:03:10 pm »
There are no diagnostic laboratory tests for CFS.

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #34 on: July 05, 2006, 07:02:27 pm »
So guys I took a 9 week test(2 days short of 9 weeks) and it was negative.  Any chance of testing positive in the next month?  Would cfs interfere with my body producing antibodies?  Sorry just still a tab bit uneasy.

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #35 on: July 05, 2006, 08:32:39 pm »
CFS will not bother with your antibodies.

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #36 on: July 06, 2006, 01:23:25 pm »
So I know you guys are like "No Seriously..." by now but what I meant to ask is that since i have cfs, that would not interfere with me seroconverting later as opposed to sooner.  That my almost 9 week test is a pretty good indication that I will remain negative in the next month?  The lady at the clinic this time told me that the only people that will seroconvert at 3 months are people who are on imunne suppressant drugs and/or people that take steroids to boost their immune system.  Is this correct?  SHe said young healthy people will seroconvert as early as 7 days.  I just want to move on with my life and get this out of my head.
Thanks!

Offline jkinatl2

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #37 on: July 06, 2006, 02:11:48 pm »
<< The lady at the clinic this time told me that the only people that will seroconvert at 3 months are people who are on imunne suppressant drugs and/or people that take steroids to boost their immune system.>>

I have not heard a lot about the steroid thing, but the rest is exactly in line with my research, and the accepted caveats here at aidsmeds.com.

And even then we are talking anecdotal late seroconversions, many of which were catalogued in the late eighties and early nineties. We're talking about a seriously FEW people, EVER. And I have yet to see any evidence of similar late seroconversion since the turn of the century, and the advancement in testing sensitivity/accuracy.

Your CFS will not impact your HIv test. If ANYTHING, an associated virus like Eptein-Barr will, on accasion, throw out a false POSITIVE on the ELISA test, because it is a test that skews towards sensitivity over accuracy.

THIS is why any positive (or indeterminate) test is followed by a Western Blot test. The dual-testing system is in place to weed out any false positives.

But there WILL be no false negatives at the appropriate window period.

Source:

http://www.aegis.com/pubs/aidswkly/2001/AW010905.html

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #38 on: July 08, 2006, 08:09:58 pm »
*So you guys think that it is very very rare to seroconvert now past the 9 week mark?* Actually 8 weeks and five days...
 I am sorry but I am very scared.  It is all that I think about.  I still have a low grade fever, I've had it for like 2 months now.  Could it be because I have been so worked up and stressed out?  I plan on moving away if I test positive because I would not be able to be around everybody that I know.  I need to know now what is going on with my body.  I know it is not possible and I will just have to wait...
I have noticed though that my lymph nodes in my neck only start to swell bigger when I start having a panic attack.  Hopefully all my symptoms are all related to stress and not (well you know what...)
I am sorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry if I have become annoying. 
I have joined up to volunteer in the aids task force where I live. I hope they contact me.But don't know if you have to have some sort of experience.  WIth all of the research that I have been doing... If anything this has surely been an eye opening experience. You are all making such a difference to all us "ww's".

Offline marie1dz

  • New Member
  • Posts: 2
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #39 on: July 08, 2006, 10:58:51 pm »
You might want to look up some online resources on how to cope with panic and anxiety to hold you over until you see see your psychologist.   It is detrimental to your health and wellbeing and the sooner you get a handle on it the better you will feel.

Take care. :)


Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #40 on: July 15, 2006, 03:32:41 pm »
Hey guys I'm still freaking out.  Here's my question:  Would I still have swollen lymph nodes at the 10 week mark if it was in fact ars symptoms?

I still have huge swollen lymphs in the left side of my neck.  Only on the left side and my ear hurts too.  Maybe it's just sinuses?  The ones in my groin are still swollen on both sides.

I have been having joint pains and muscle cramps for the last couple of days now.  Would I still be feeling sick if it were ars symptoms?  Thanks to anyone that replies...

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #41 on: July 20, 2006, 10:03:57 pm »
Hey I'm back again, your royal pain in the behind!!
So I couldn't wait the full 13 weeks so I went at 11.  Approx. 75 days actually.

How likely is that to change?  I kinda already know the answer but I just wanted some reassurance.

2 more weeks to go!! I CANT WAIT FOR THIS TO BE OVER ALREADY!!

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #42 on: July 21, 2006, 06:27:56 am »
Still,

Considering that hiv is rarely transmitted orally and you didn't really need to test in the first place, your test result is not going to change.

I'm hoping you can begin to put this behind you now.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #43 on: August 01, 2006, 02:34:13 pm »
Just wanted to let you guys know that I go for my final test in a couple hours.  Will let you know how it goes.  I can't stop shaking.  Thank you all for helping me through this, the hardest time of my whole life.  A couple more hours and it's all over.  I'll let you know my result.  I pray that you are right.

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #44 on: August 01, 2006, 09:25:41 pm »
Ok, my test today, taken at 12 weeks and 4 days, was negative.  I am done now.  Thank you all sooooooo much, especially Ann.  Really it meant alot, the work you do here is amazing. 
Take care

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,134
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #45 on: August 02, 2006, 04:58:12 am »
Still,

No big surprise there. Protect your negative status by using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you will remain hiv negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Still Worried

  • Member
  • Posts: 25
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #46 on: August 05, 2006, 07:02:36 pm »
I really don't want to do this, but here goes.  SInce I have chronic fatigue syndrome, would that put me in the 6 month category considering my immune system is a little bit weaker than most people?  I don't want to do this anymore, I really don't.

Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #47 on: August 05, 2006, 07:05:04 pm »
Then don't. It's all up to you. You have received you negative result so it's time for you to get on with your life.

Offline Morgan

  • Member
  • Posts: 382
  • You did WHAT??
Re: Still very worried, need advice please
« Reply #48 on: August 05, 2006, 07:35:16 pm »
Chronic fatigue syndrome would not delay seroconversion and extend your window period.  You're negative, and as such, in need of no further testing.

Morgan :)
Morgan Landers

 


Terms of Membership for these forums
 

© 2024 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.