POZ Community Forums
Main Forums => Living With HIV => Topic started by: Lou-ah-vull on December 29, 2010, 11:04:47 pm
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Today (Dec. 29) is the anniversary of my partner Michael's death from complications of AIDS in 1993. As I have posted before, and many others have recollected, the world was very different in the late 80s and early 90s, but a day like today brings all those memories back to me. It still seems like just yesterday when Michael died yet so much has happened to me and to all of us since then.
I most likely was infected in 2000 and was diagnosed in 2005. I had the fortune of starting with well tested medicine and never experienced the opportunistic infections and terrible consequences Michael and his contemporaries lived with. We lived together in Washington DC back then, probably one of the best places for medical care and community support. Nevertheless, there was nothing like this online community and especially our annual AMG gatherings.
I live a relatively discreet and private life but this forum and our gatherings have put a wonderful and healing face on a disease that has caused my deepest grief and my own personal illness. Those of you who do know me probably don't realize how important your friendship, support and shared experience means to me. Dec 29 will probably always be a melancholy day for me but it would please Michael to no end to know that I am lifted up by such a supportive and loving community.
So...as the New Year approaches, a toast to our friends, partners and families who are no longer with us. May their spirits lift up our spirits. As we enter into 2011, there is still very good reason to face it with confidence, with courage, and most importantly with hope! As Pryor says at the end of Angels in America "the world only spins forward!"
Happy New Year and heartfelt thanks to my AMG community.
Gary
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Hugs to you Gary, and may 2011 bring you everything you wish for.
This is just for you.
"You will find, my friend, that what you love will take you places you never dreamed you'd go~~ ~Angels in America.. ;)
Aroha
Jan :-*
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Gary...
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what a beautiful toast. And, yes, may their spirits lift up our spirits and together we can float "...up, like skydivers in reverse, limbs all akimbo, wheeling and spinning....
auld lang syne.
robert
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Vale, Michael. And Hale, Gary. Sometimes I think it is only through crawling through the unspeakable muck of grief and loss that we find our true selves.
Thank you for shining. Please shine on.
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Happy New Year, Gary. Thank you for sharing that, and for being a part of this community. I always appreciate reading your posts.
Cheers.
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Gary,
Happy New Year to you too! Thanks for sharing and thanks for being part of this family.
I hope I get to see you in 2011 -- in Seattle.
Hugs,
Mike
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Happy New year Gary such a touching tribute to a lost loved one.... he will always be with you......
Nick
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Happy New Year
My best for a healthy 2011.
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Yes, he will always be with you.
Thank you for writing this.
hugs,
Sharkie
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Thanks for sharing Michael's story. I often think about the millions who didn't make it to see HAART or didn't have access to it. I cannot imagine what it felt like to hear you have this virus and nothing could be done about it. I suppose only people with terminal cancer, or other terminal illnesses, could relate to that today.
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I was originally going to PM you my response but thought I would share it with everyone....
Dec 29 will probably always be a melancholy day for me but it would please Michael to no end to know that I am lifted up by such a supportive and loving community.
Most definitely, however I'm certain it also pleases Michael to see how YOU lift alot of us up with your kind spirit and comforting words at our Memorials during AMG. Every year I cannot wait to sit in front of you and be a part of the uplifting words you have for us. For me, it is always the hi lite of the gathering. I can always count on taking something very special away with me and I try to touch on that each day..."Just live life".
The love you have for Michael is beautiful and touching, it's evident as you speak at the memorials and recount memories of him, the love just purs out. I wished I could have known him.
So as you remember Michael on this anniversary please take time to remember that you are a very special person in my life, and you have been an invaluable to me in the 2 years I have been living with HIV, I value your friendship and the few days each summer we get to spend together. (Yes, Michael would be very pleased that you have had such a positive impact on anothers life)
Here's to a wonderful 2011 for you Gary!
-Will
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What a wonderful way to begin a new year by reading all of your very kind comments, especially Will's! I like to begin a new year on an "up" note and this certainly helped!
Gary
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Very well said Gary.. a tear and a smile from reading that. Happy New Year to you. I know we are all so thankful to be alive in 2011.