Could it be?

[questioning2]

I am a female who, apart from oral sex, is a virgin. I twice performed unprotected oral sex on a male of unknown status, once two weeks ago and once three weeks ago. He did not ejaculate into my mouth either time, however I did taste some precum. I know that this man has had multiple sexual partners in the past. He said he had been tested about a year ago and always uses protection, however I know he has had partners since his last test. The thought that he could have contracted HIV recently and have a very high viral load also concerns me.

I have read some through this forum and have seen that the moderators believe it is unlikely that one could contract HIV from giving oral sex. However, my fear lies in the fact that leading up to performing oral sex, I had been under extreme stress and had experienced acute anxiety for at least three weeks due to a recent breakup. I am worried that this compromised my immune system making my saliva less likely to fight off potential HIV. My mouth was also pretty dry, I assume from being so stressed in the weeks prior, and so really there wasn't much saliva anyway. I also believe that I had the beginning of two canker sores (which I have always gotten a few times a year throughout my life), one on my tongue and one just inside my lip. I believe this because the evening after the second incidence of oral sex (about 24 hours afterwards) I had two full blown canker sore in my mouth and so I assume they had already began forming at the time I gave oral sex. I of course am also now experiencing other "symptoms" of early HIV- I have a sore throat, two glands in my neck are swollen, and I feel generally under the weather. However, I have been so worried the last few days that I feel it's possible I'm also stressing myself/tricking myself into having these symtoms, if that's even possibe.

I am so angry with myself for being so stupid. The thought of HIV never even crossed my mind when performing the oral sex, and I only started worrying after going online regarding concern about other potential STDs that could be caught via oral sex, and then seeing all of the information on government and medical websites regarding the different reports of people getting HIV from oral sex. I know that many on this forum have discounted those reports, but I'm worried that maybe they weren't all lying/mistaken and some of the reports were in fact a true case of HIV being contracted through giving oral sex.

I guess my main question is, given the circumstances- my potentially low immune system, the beginning of sores in my mouth, lack of saliva, definite precum, his potential high viral load if he is HIV positive- should I get tested (other than for my own peace of mind)? Is the situation even a small risk that would warrant HIV testing? Could I be one of the very rare few who contract HIV this way?

I am hoping just talking about this will ease my fears. I come from a very religious family and feel there is no one I can confide in about my fears regarding this incidence. Total abstinence before marriage was pretty much the only option taught to me while growing up, and a scare like this makes me realize that if I am ever lucky enough to have children someday, I will definitely take a more open approach towards sex education with them so they will be more aware of the risks/options available to them.

Thanks in advance for your reponse.

[RapidRod]

HIV is transmitted by;
Unprotected penetrative anal and/or vaginal sex
Sharing works with other IV drug abusers
Mother to child

You never had a risk of contracting HIV. STDs is what you should concern yourself with.

[Andy Velez]

You are making this way more complicated than it needs to be. And I understand there is all sorts of emotional stuff involved.

But the risk for HIV via giving oral is really more theoretical than real. Your saliva has over a dozen elements and proteins which very effectively prevent the transmission of viable HIV if it is present.

I don't see any cause for further concern nor for testing unless you need the inevitable negative result just for your peace of mind. The only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. As long as you consistently use condoms for those activities you will be well protected.

This is NOT an HIV situation.

[questioning2]

Thank you both for your quick response. I will do my best to let this situation go and move on.

[Andy Velez]

Good. If we had any doubts we would say so.

Get on with your life.