Dating and disclosure - my first experience

[mplsdoubled]

Hello,

Just wanted to share my first experience with dating and disclosure.  I had my third date with a nice guy on Saturday night.  At the end of the evening we talked a little bit about how we were each feeling and what we were thinking about continuing to date. 

Because I want to see him again and keep an open mind to what it could be, I did disclose my status and also explained that I wasn't ready to have sex yet but felt he should know so he could factor that into his decision about whether to move forward.  His initial reaction was very positive - and he even called again the next day to ask me out again!

I don't know if this is really something that I see being long-term but the experience of sharing at what I believed was an appropriate time and the reaction I received was very validating.  HIV doesn't have to be a deal breaker.  I'm sure there will be times when the reaction might not be as good but I suspect that if I handle the delivery of the news with tact, confidence and respect, it will be received in much the same way.

One of the blessings with all of this is that in the past, I found myself either judging someone immediately upon meeting them and either ruling them out completely or wanting to RUSH into something.  Today, I have a lot more to consider before making those decisions and it's forcing me to take things slowly and to develop a friendship before making any decisions about a relationship.  It feels good.

Happy Holiday's to you all!

[Andy Velez]

Good deal, MP. Nicely done. Great attitude and action on your part.

Keep us posted on how things evolve. Whether you and this fella continue on or not, you're in a good place emotionally and spiritually about handling this challenging issue.

Cheers,