POZ Community Forums
HIV Prevention and Testing => Do I Have HIV? => Topic started by: first_time on October 26, 2006, 10:54:28 am
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I had my sex for the first time with a girl in the massage parlour yesterday. She put the condom all right, and I even checked that there was no air on top of the condom and the condom didn't break . As a frist timer, the intercourse was very brief and I didn't notice ani secretion from her vagina. Before having the sex, I had been having jock itch and it was healing..I totally forgot about a small sore on the inner thigh. But I don't think I had any contacts of inner thigh and vagina..Also I masturbrated 4 times after sex and 2 times before sex...
Today I am feeling dizzy, I don't have fever..but I am feeling something in the body is changing..it can be anxiety but I am afraid of HIV too.. could it be that the virus have entered through teh sore on the thigh ?? my penis doesn't have any cuts/sores..and the condom didn't break..would the exposure to the environment kill the virus ?? and if I amde no or very less contact is it possible that the virus can be transfrered ??
Should I take a HIV test ?
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First,
Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus that is primarily transmitted INSIDE the human body, as in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. You would not have become infected via a sore on your leg.
Please read through the Welcome Thread (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=220.0) and follow the Transmission Lesson link found there so you can bring yourself up to speed on how hiv IS transmitted. Here's what else you need to know to protect yourself:
You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection.
Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.
Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.
You don't need to start having these check-ups until you are more sexually active on a regular basis. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.
You did the right thing and used a condom for intercourse. Keep using them and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.
Ann
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You did the right thing, you used protection. Keep using protection EVERY TIME. Condoms are very effective against most STDs and HIV. There are some STDs you can still get even if you use condoms though and they are primarily STDs that can be transmitted via skin-to-skin contact such as HPV (can cause warts or cancer if left untreated) So ALWAYS use protection AND ALWAYS use common sense too. :)
Remember, becoming sexually active means you also have to be sexually responsible. Enjoy safe & healthy sexuality. Cheers.
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Thanx for reply on such short time.
First, I am worried because the inner thigh is near the penis so a sore on it might have been brushed during those 30 seconds. Secondly, I don't think I made full insertion of penis nor do I think that she secreted blood..
From what I read in some other post in this forum..a vaginal rubbing would be highly unlikely to contract HIV, can I be relieved that the sore that was a little bit open would also not be infected since it has not been inserted in the vagina..
I am deciding not to worry about this incident too much and not have further STD/HIV tests as this is my only sexual encounter in my whole life . I am 23 years old.
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Also, since I just had that brief encoutner just yesterday...isn't it too early for any symptonms to appear..I am now feeling quite certain that is pure anxiety and nervousness from HIV.
Ann, I also like your idea of monogamy, I think I will apply that for the rest of my life. I will never be stupid and worry..
Again, Thanx for your replies..I was really worried....and wanted to be certain that my situation is not a *risky* one to contract AIDS.
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first,
Yes it is too early - much too early - for symptoms. Symptoms or even the lack of symptoms means nothing when it comes to hiv infection anyway, but if they do happen at all, it takes between two and four weeks for them to appear.
There is just no way you would have become infected through this sore on your leg, so relax about that. No kidding.
The correct usage of condoms will protect you whether there is blood present or not. As long as you've got that condom on and it is covering the head of your penis, you're good to go. You can have one partner or one hundred, as long as you use condoms for intercourse you'll be ok.
Relax. You've done all the right things. You didn't have a risk of hiv infection.
Ann
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So I can be relieved even if this sore is near the penis(the inner thigh) but not on it ..wanted to be certain since you are referring the leg..( want to focus on the higher part of the leg).
Since the part is not penetrating, it is not infected right ? The head of the penis was covered right..and I checked that the condom was not broken too.
Thanx..again ...I can sleep tonight ....
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So it is all right if I don't take the STD/HIV tests right ? I have only this *one* encounter through out my whole life. Just wanted to be sure so that when I find my right partner we could have a healthy relationship and what I had done now wouldn't affect the relationship then.
Also, you mentionaed sexually active, does this been regularly having sex or will I be included into the active category.
Basically, I just want to be 100% certain that it would be OK, if I don't take teh test now and I could have sex with my partner later in my life..
Thanx again for you help...I needed it indeed..
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first,
There is just no way you would have become infected through this sore on your UPPER THIGH, so relax about that. No kidding.
You don't need to test over this one, ONE incident in your life. When you start having intercourse on a regular basis is when you need to start having regular sexual health care check ups. Think of it like a regular visit to the dentist. You don't start seeing the dentist until you have a few teeth. OK?
You are just fine. Now relax.
Ann
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Thanx Ann, you have been a great help. I know I am starting to get nagging . But I need to clear this one thing. Even though my part of the inner thigh might have brushed(not sure) during the thrushing(lasted only 5-6 time) , you are absolutely sure I am at no risk right ? So touching from a sore that is open a little bit on the outer vagina has no risk of transfer of HIV ? However I am not sure if that happened, just want to be on the safe side .
After these question I will be crystal clear :) thanx again.
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First,
I have had sex a time or two in my life and I understand exactly what you are saying about the sore and the thigh and the vagina and the juices... really, I do. Been there, done that, mate.
Now please understand what I am saying to you. You did not have a risk because you had a sore on your upper thigh, right in close to the action, possibly even being brushed up against by a vagina, five, six, maybe even a hundred times. No risk.
Ann
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Thanx Ann, once again.
I will take your advice and will not be going to test for STD/HIV. It is like hell going over those testing place here in South East Asia.
I am feeling dizzy and nauseating today..but now I know it is due to the fear and guilt and not due to any symptoms.. I will try to be stronger psychologically and of course use common sense and protection .
This is a great forum and you guys help me feel relieved a lottttt..
Thanx once again ..
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Can someone help me fight this fear ??..I know I am at no risk but why this fear..
Even today I felt a bit worried the whole day. I felt weakness, my legs would have no power and often they would sleep as though blood has been blocked...My legs would feel weak..funny feeling in the stomach and I wouldn't want to eat much but I tried to eat as much as I can in the evening..
Also in the afternoon..I felt nauseating ....sometimes just while staying I would feel that my legs have no power...feeling something different is going on ..
What is happening ..my gosh ...I need someone to help me fight the fear....
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First,
I'm afraid there's not much we can do about your fear here. We can only give you the facts surrounding hiv transmission, the facts that tell us you had no risk.
If you cannot come to terms with this, perhaps you would benefit from seeing a counselor face-to-face. We can't do that for you here.
Ann
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I had no risk even if I had a cut on the sore right ?? just want to be sure...
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and ...feeling nauseating, a bit of headache an dizziness could be anything isn't it ?
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I should think that masturbating six times in one day, along with the encounter with the massage-parlor girl, could be causing some of your symptoms, like the weakness and dizziness you speak of.
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edfu, I so wish that, that is the real problem..
Also it has been only 2 days so any symptoms is way too early according to Ann.
Ann, would you mind also clarifying what are the means that HIV would be transfered besides unsafe intercourse i.e. through cuts..Will Fingering with a hand that has cut be considered as a risk . ( though I have not done that ).
What other ways are there for HIV to transfered from the cut ? Do cuts/sores also have to be deeply penetrated ? Thinking logically ( as I am a computer programmer), I guess thats why condom is made only for penis. If it was so dangerous, condom would have been bade fro balls as well...because there might be unknown cracks on balls some times which may be constatnly brushing vagina during intercourse..
Am I correct ? Please enlighten me on some of my doubts ?
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first,
Stop the over-analysing already. You will become infected with hiv through the following sexual activities. 1. Putting your bare penis inside a vagina or anus of an hiv positive person. 2. Allowing an hiv positive person to put his unprotected penis inside your anus. And that's it. Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus that needs to bump into specific cells in order to infect. These cells are not found in small wounds, but they are found in the lining of the urethra and the anus.
You did NOT have a risk of hiv infection. I would tell you if you did. I want you to be healthy and hiv negative. That's the whole point of this exercise so why would I tell you something that wasn't true?
Ann
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Thanx, I hope I will stop worrying now.
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First, along with totally supporting everything Ann has told you about your not having been at risk for HIV, I want to add a further thought.
Becoming sexually active is very exciting. It also can stir up a lot of anxiety as you sort out your feelings and how to do what and all of that wonderful stuff. When that happens it's also very easy to become overly concerned about HIV and physical stuff in general not unlike the way you have.
Just take a breath and go at the pace that is right for you in terms of what you do sexually. As long as you consistently use condoms for intercourse you will be ok as far as HIV goes.
Cheers,
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So, if I take a STD/HIV test for this incident ( considering this is the only incident that I have been involved with ), do you guys think I will be wasting money ?
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first,
If you test over this incident you will be wasting time, money and resources.
Ann
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Is it possible that even if person puts the condom properly, is on top having both anal/vaginal sex, condom doesn't break but can still be tested for positive ? How reliable are condoms ?
If I am not sure about the status or perhaps certain that the other person is a HIV positive, but the condom hasn't broke...should I be tested ?
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Please keep all your questions and comments in your original thread. You won't be answered until you do - per the posting guidelines for this forum. If you need help finding it, click your own name and "show own posts".
Thank you.
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I've merged your threads. Keep all of your entries in this same thread. Thanks.
As for your latest concern, if a condom had broken you would have known it because it's not a subtle event. The condom ends up looking like a hula hoop on your penis.
Condoms provide VERY effective protection against HIV transmission. As long as you wear a condom for either vaginal or anal intercourse the HIV status of the other person is irrelevant because you are well protected.
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Yes the condom didn't broke....as I tested it afterwards while wrapping it up. So are these only rumours that condoms are not 100% safe ???
What about HIV being transmitted through vaginal fluid getting into ome scratch in the finger while fingering ?
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HIV is a fragile virus which requires the kind of receptive setting which exists with unprotected vaginal or anal intercourse.
Scratches, nicks, bruises, sores and other such on fingers and other body parts do not provide that setting.
As for condoms being 100% safe, NOTHING other than your own hand masturbating yourself is 100% safe. Anytime you have sex with someone else there is theoretically some risk for transmission. But we know from long and well documented experience in the epidemic that it's all about unprotected intercourse.
You are worrying needlessly so give it the what ifs and the buts what abouts and get on with your life. Really.
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thanks so no need to worry no need to test right ??? besides the condom didn't break so I shouldn't worry.. Thanks a lot. From next time onwards I am only going to try monogamous safe relations...guess I was afraid because of this dizziness...which again I shouldn't be because there is going to be no symptom after 2-3 days right ???
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ok ..may be I am psyched but I have a few worries....I am having a funny feeling in my stomach for about a week now :(...
Also..I am in love with a girl and am about to marry. I don't want to tell her my 3 counters with prostitute...all protected sex with no condom breakage....should I test myself ?? I don't want to ruin her life.....
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first,
You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. THIS INCLUDES YOUR WIFE-TO-BE. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.
Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.
Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.
If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.
Ann
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well..I am not that active...it's just my 3rd encounter in around 3 years....and I am afraid this time...because I think the girl might have HIV. My question still is, am I OK if I skip the test because I had protected sex.
If it's totally OK to not be tested..can I be so sure that when I marry in a week I can have unprotected sex with my partner ?? But ofcourse she has tested to be negative in her test.
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I am asking becuase..the part of the world I live in...where it's so under-developed....it's a hassle to have HIV test done..and you always get looked upon by skewed eyess..
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FT-
Ann was, as always, spot on, in her latest post to you.
Get tested together, stay monogamous, and enjoy your lives.
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I do think we both should get tested before having unprotected sex.
However, my question is for the situation that I posted earlier...the unbroken condom case...should I need to test ? Or would I be wasting money over it..as I would eventually turn out negative.... is there any statistically data of people who have got infected with *protected* sex ??
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As long as your condom didn't break there is no need for testing.
Just in general anytime a couple are planning to be monogamous and not use condoms it's always a good idea for both to get tested together. Nothing you have reported leads me to expect other than a negative result for you. With you two starting out in married life, get tested together and remove any doubts in either of your minds.
Good luck.
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do you mean that I am still at some risk ? more than the monogamous relationship..I am worried about my LIFE...what if i am in that small percentage who got infected even after protected sex...???
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first,
No, we're not saying you were at risk during protected intercourse. People do not become infected with hiv when condoms are used and remain intact.
What we ARE saying is that ANY couple who wants to stop using condoms should first be in a monogamous relationship and second, should test for ALL sexually transmitted infections TOGETHER before having unprotected intercourse.
For all you know your wife-to-be could have chlamydia or something. Chlamydia is VERY common and very easily transmitted. We always recommend testing together for everything, not just hiv, before doing away with condoms. It's just what responsible adults do.
Ann
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thanks..so I will test when we marry...and decide to have unprotected sex. Meantime I can be assured not to be tested for *this* incident now, can't I ?
One more thing..please clarify my ignorant brain once and for all that HIV can't be transfered through microscopic pores in the condom (if there are any that is,because I have heard rumours about it). If the condom as in tact and all my sperms in it...I am safe am I not ?
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thanks..so I will test when we marry...and decide to have unprotected sex. Meantime I can be assured not to be tested for *this* incident now, can't I ?
But you are getting married in a week, so what difference does it make? NO - you should not be at risk for this incident, but stop looking so desperately for someone to let you totally off the hook about testing altogether, man. As stated before, you should BOTH be tested for everything - TOGETHER to give yourselves the all clear before engaging in unprotected sex. Man up and do it already.
But ofcourse she has tested to be negative in her test
So if she weathered the hassle to have HIV test done
and getting looked upon by skewed eyess
So can you.
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first,
The "microscopic hole" crap is just something dreamed up by religious types to scare you away from using condoms. There is NO SUCH THING as "microscopic holes" in condoms.
Condoms have been PROVEN to prevent hiv infection.
Ann
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I am embarrased to tell this but in the new year party I had a mild kissing scenario with a bar dancer (HIV status unknown). Today I found that I had a soar inner part of the lips, I should be ok with this as there hasn't been any scenario reported where HIV has been contracted by kissing right ??? Also she licked my finger and I found that I had cuts in the same finger.
Am I at risk ? Should I test for this condition ?
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You were never at risk of contracting HIV.
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Thanks. Also is it a possibility that drinking from the same glass or using the same spoon could be risk at some point and we should stay alert of that in daily life ?
It would be great if someone could clarify why it is not a risk even if the saliva enters the open cut because I've read that saliva does contain HIV.
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Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.
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You've been coming around long enough to know the basics about HIV transmission sexually. It's really very, very simple. Always use condoms for vaginal and anal intercourse. That's it. Everything else sexual is strictly theoretical as far as risk is concerned.
As for kissing, it's absolutely not a risk. Your own saliva contains enzymes and proteins which very effectively neutralize the transmission of viable HIV if it's even present in the other person.
Re-read the lesson on Transmission and get on with your life.