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Author Topic: Risk Analysis - Threesome (FFM)  (Read 2090 times)

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Offline anonthrowaway911

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Risk Analysis - Threesome (FFM)
« on: April 24, 2017, 07:10:42 pm »
Hi Everyone,

I am hoping someone on this board can just tell me I am overthinking things.

My GF and I are negative. My GF and I had a threesome with a random girl (lets call her R) from a bar - first time ever. Everything I did with R was covered. R only did kissing (mouth) and touching with my GF. What I am worried about is that after having protected vaginal sex with R, I took off the condom, wiped by penis with a t shirt, and proceeded with unprotected sex with my GF. After the night went by, I remembered and started to worry that when I took off the condom after my time with R, her vaginal discharge was at the base of my penis and condom. I only wiped off the discharge with a shirt and proceeded unprotected with my GF.

So, are we at risk? Or am I overthinking it?

Thanks in advance!  :)
« Last Edit: April 24, 2017, 07:30:46 pm by anonthrowaway911 »

Offline Ptrk3

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Re: Risk Analysis - Threesome (FFM)
« Reply #1 on: April 24, 2017, 07:27:23 pm »
By "clean," I presume you mean HIV negative, but you should know that this terminology is offensive to HIV positive people who are not "dirty" if they bathe and/or shower regularly.  Though you, of course, did not mean to insult people on these forums, please keep your terminology in mind as you go forward in your life, since the implication that people living with HIV are "dirty" contributes to the ongoing residual stigma people with HIV face:  words have meaning.

To your question, you are most likely overthinking things.  Since everything you did with "R" was protected, you did not have a risk for HIV infection. The HIV is fragile and does not survive contact with air, so any residual vaginal discharge at the base of your penis or on the condom would not be a viable mode of HIV transmission to you or your girlfriend.

Finally, assuming that your girlfriend is HIV negative, you are not at risk of contracting HIV from her during your act of unprotected vaginal intercourse with her.
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Offline anonthrowaway911

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Re: Risk Analysis - Threesome (FFM)
« Reply #2 on: April 25, 2017, 01:41:36 pm »
I truly apologize for using ignorant terminology. I meant no offense to anyone.

Thank you for your response. So it doesn't really matter if it was only a short period of time between taking off the condom, wiping, and insertion (all within about half a minute)?

By "clean," I presume you mean HIV negative, but you should know that this terminology is offensive to HIV positive people who are not "dirty" if they bathe and/or shower regularly.  Though you, of course, did not mean to insult people on these forums, please keep your terminology in mind as you go forward in your life, since the implication that people living with HIV are "dirty" contributes to the ongoing residual stigma people with HIV face:  words have meaning.

To your question, you are most likely overthinking things.  Since everything you did with "R" was protected, you did not have a risk for HIV infection. The HIV is fragile and does not survive contact with air, so any residual vaginal discharge at the base of your penis or on the condom would not be a viable mode of HIV transmission to you or your girlfriend.

Finally, assuming that your girlfriend is HIV negative, you are not at risk of contracting HIV from her during your act of unprotected vaginal intercourse with her.

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Risk Analysis - Threesome (FFM)
« Reply #3 on: April 25, 2017, 02:19:56 pm »
No its makes no difference.  What you posted was simply not a HIV risk to you.
 
The only HIV risk you generally had was/is having unprotected sex with your GF, a risk you seem happy to accept.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, every time, no exceptions.

Keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please do get fully tested regularly and at least yearly for all STI's including but not limited to HIV and test more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs

Also note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and the only way of knowing is by testing.

More information on HIV Basics, PEP, TaSP and Transmission can be found through the links in my signature to our POZ pages, this includes information on HIV Testing

Kind regards

Jim

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« Last Edit: April 25, 2017, 02:22:21 pm by JimDublin »
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Offline anonthrowaway911

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Re: Risk Analysis - Threesome (FFM)
« Reply #4 on: April 25, 2017, 02:35:28 pm »
Thanks for your reply, Jim! My GF and I have not been with anyone else for more than four years so there is no risk between me and her. This incident was the only time we both been with someone else.

And by saying "simply not a HIV risk to you[,]" means both of us, correct?

No its makes no difference.  What you posted was simply not a HIV risk to you.
 
The only HIV risk you generally had was/is having unprotected sex with your GF, a risk you seem happy to accept.

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Risk Analysis - Threesome (FFM)
« Reply #5 on: April 25, 2017, 02:44:34 pm »
Hi

Look touching and kissing are not HIV risks.

But this part is real simple, unprotected intercourse is the main sexual route of HIV transmission, past test results, other peoples results and trust do not prevent HIV.  Intact condoms do, and so agreeing to unprotected intercourse is accepting a level of risk for HIV transmission. 

Hence we advice people to reduce risk, use condoms and test at least yearly.
If you choose to do so or not is up to you.

Jim
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

My Instagram
Threads

 


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