Author Topic: Very Scared about first time cunnilingus experience (Read 38131 times)

scaredandlonely · « **on:** January 12, 2007, 05:40:24 pm »

Hi Everyone

I have been reading up on this subject and am starting to cope with this but I want some input as well. Here is my situation. I went to a massage parlor and got a handjob from the lady there, but while I was getting the handjob, I gave her oral but only for maybe 2-3 mins, and I did not see any sign of blood or anything like that. Now I am freaking out because I have a wife and daugther at home and I don't know if I am in danger of HIV or not. I read that is not a high risk but my oral health is not 100%, sometimes bleeding with brushing and three crowns in mouth. I am waiting to get tested, but I want to get some input on this issue if I even should be worried about testing or should just do it for piece of mind.

Thanks Everyone

RapidRod · « **Reply #1 on:** January 12, 2007, 05:41:56 pm »

HIV no worry other STDs possible.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #2 on:** January 12, 2007, 05:42:59 pm »

What Kind of other std's could I get??

RapidRod · « **Reply #3 on:** January 12, 2007, 05:46:43 pm »

Gonorrhea, syphilis, Herpies, and chlamydia to name a few.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #4 on:** January 12, 2007, 05:55:02 pm »

Thanks, I will do a full STD panel, I am probably due anyways, but is the HIV Testing even needed then or no?

RapidRod · « **Reply #5 on:** January 12, 2007, 05:57:59 pm »

No, an HIV test is not needed for cunnilingus.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #6 on:** January 12, 2007, 05:59:00 pm »

Can anyone else give me a second opinion? I am just trying to get on with this and need some help. I really appreciate it and thank you in advance as this is my only outlet to express my fear.

cubbybear · « **Reply #7 on:** January 12, 2007, 06:04:25 pm »

You really do not need a 2nd opinion, and Rod is more than capable of assessing your risk. As for a second opinion, I also do not believe you need to test over this situation. You are not going to get HIV from going down on a woman, but like Rod said, you may want to test for other STI's.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #8 on:** January 12, 2007, 06:15:10 pm »

Thanks Rapid and Cubby

I really do appreciate the advice, I will most likely test anyways because I am just a freak like that

but I will not worry about a thing that is not there. Thanks for all the support, if you dont mind I will be back from time to time to update my situation.

I really do appreciate it again.

Thanks

cubbybear · « **Reply #9 on:** January 12, 2007, 06:22:52 pm »

No worries, if you need to test for your own peace of mind and sanity to help with any anxiety, then that can only be a good thing, but I totally expect to hear back from you with nothing more than a negative result.

Cheers.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #10 on:** January 13, 2007, 08:32:28 am »

Hi Everyone

I just can't get this out of my head!! Has there ever been a case of a male contracting HIV from cunnilingus??
I am so nervous it is making me sick! I think it is most likely the guilt but I keep running through my head "what if?" Anyone who has been here before, can you let me know what you did to calm down until you could get tested?

Thanks Everyone, you have been a great help already!!

RapidRod · « **Reply #11 on:** January 13, 2007, 11:11:40 am »

No, we've already told you that there wasn't any risk. If some one would have ever contracted HIV, then we certainly would have not told you you weren't at risk.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #12 on:** January 13, 2007, 11:28:19 am »

If there was a test for guilt you would be in serious trouble. That's really what this is about because as far as HIV there is no basis for concern about this incident.

You can't undo the fact that you're a dog like the rest of us and you went straying. So wringing your hands and worrying won't do you or anyone else you care about any good. Testing is a waste of energy and assets, but go ahead and do it if that's going to close the situation for you.

What you really need to do is accept what you did, take a breath and get on with your life. That's the most loving thing to do for all concerned. No kidding.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #13 on:** January 15, 2007, 09:50:52 am »

Thanks Everyone

I am kind of nervous this morning though because I am noticing white lines in my mouth, but not like thrush, it is like a line and a couple of spots but they came off with my toothbrush? My question is, is this a symptom of HIV or any other STD?? I don't feel any other pain or anything like that, but the white patches are concerning to me. Thank you for everything you guys have done for me so far and the advice you have given me. Any feedback on this issue would be great though.

Thank You

RapidRod · « **Reply #14 on:** January 15, 2007, 10:02:50 am »

Reread all the replies that you have been given. Any of the symptoms you can come up with has nothing to do with HIV. See your doctor if you have concerns.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #15 on:** January 15, 2007, 10:06:46 am »

Are you listening?

Feeling nervous doesn't equal being HIV infected. You've been repeatedly told you weren't at risk. Feelings are not HIV facts.

Like I said before, you're dog. But that still doesn't change the fact that you were not at risk for HIV in this incident. Period.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #16 on:** January 15, 2007, 09:18:23 pm »

I still cant shake this, I saw this white spottedness in the inner parts of my cheeks 2 days after this incident and I can't get rid of it, when I look at sites that say what causes this, it points to HIV. Can someone please tell me if they had this symptom or is my mind just messing with me? I know I am being kind of a pain with this low risk issue, but I am really scared since this wont go away. I know in my mind if I didn't have this, that I would not be as nervous.

Any input would be great

RapidRod · « **Reply #17 on:** January 16, 2007, 03:13:40 am »

No your symptoms do not point to HIV at all. Your symptoms came on to quick to even begin to have any correlation to HIV..

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #18 on:** January 16, 2007, 01:01:38 pm »

It must be all in my head because the symptoms practically went away, all but one spot on my inner cheek but everything else cleared up. Thanks everyone who has given me input, especially Rod and Andy. I am still kind of stressing but that is probably from the guilt of this and being stupid in regards to my own personal decisions. One more question for the road, even though there was no risk, I want to test anyways, just for closure. My question is could I do that at six weeks and rely on that result? I know CDC says 3 months but, I want to test ASAP to just forget about this.

Thanks Everyone.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #19 on:** January 17, 2007, 06:17:55 pm »

Hi Everyone

I am resposting just because I hadn't recieved any replies. Any input on the previous message would be great.

Thanks

RapidRod · « **Reply #20 on:** January 17, 2007, 06:27:04 pm »

If you have never had a risk, there is no time line to test. It's just a waste of money and resources.

Coffeechick88 · « **Reply #21 on:** January 17, 2007, 06:29:24 pm »

Quote from: scaredandlonely on January 16, 2007, 01:01:38 pm

It must be all in my head because the symptoms practically went away, all but one spot on my inner cheek but everything else cleared up. Thanks everyone who has given me input, especially Rod and Andy. I am still kind of stressing but that is probably from the guilt of this and being stupid in regards to my own personal decisions. One more question for the road, even though there was no risk, I want to test anyways, just for closure. My question is could I do that at six weeks and rely on that result? I know CDC says 3 months but, I want to test ASAP to just forget about this.

Thanks Everyone.

Most people who are positive will test positive at 6 weeks, but to be definitive, a 3 month test is needed. So a 6 week test, while extremely encouraging isn't conclusive. In your case, it is up to you what you do. There really isn't any need for you to test, so I would say in your case a 6 week test is fine, since it will say negative and any more tests after that will be negative since you didn't get HIV in this case. Whatever you feel like doing, I gave you the guidelines......

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #22 on:** January 18, 2007, 05:38:14 pm »

Hi Everyone

I keep thinking about this, I know it is stupid, but I just can't get this out of my head. Is the Home Access test just as good as a doctors test?

ACinKC · « **Reply #23 on:** January 18, 2007, 05:39:44 pm »

Oraquick is 99.8% effective. And it doesnt have a problem with false NEGATIVES, false POSITIVES only.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #24 on:** January 18, 2007, 05:40:49 pm »

Is that the take home test?? I know the other one was like HIV Express or something like that?

ACinKC · « **Reply #25 on:** January 18, 2007, 05:48:26 pm »

Oraquick is not a take home test i dont believe. Home Access is one of the only ones approved by the FDA that I am aware of. Others shall speak on this more shortly im sure.

RapidRod · « **Reply #26 on:** January 18, 2007, 08:03:06 pm »

AC is correct, Home Access is the only FDA approved home testing kit.

dtwpuck · « **Reply #27 on:** January 18, 2007, 08:29:44 pm »

How's this for an idea? Give you wife cunilingus and stick with that.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #28 on:** January 18, 2007, 09:25:39 pm »

Thanks Everyone

And Puck, I agree, it was a stupid mistake that will never happen again. This has opened my eyes big time, even though you have all told me it is not a risk, I am still nervous about it, but that is probably just the guilt. You have all been great, thank you for that in my time of need.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #29 on:** January 19, 2007, 07:19:08 am »

This morning I woke up and saw that someone had a website where there was a risk on this forum. I was being told that there is no risk, only therotical. Can someone please shed some light on this, it really has me freaked out again.

RapidRod · « **Reply #30 on:** January 19, 2007, 09:10:06 am »

Yeah, and if you look hard enough, you'll find a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

ACinKC · « **Reply #31 on:** January 19, 2007, 11:01:05 am »

Scared...

Easy analogy. Time travel is a theoretical possibility. You can find a few instances where people "SAY" they have done it. Go find me someone who has PROVEN they have done it.

Same thing with your situation.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #32 on:** January 19, 2007, 11:05:10 am »

I know that, it is just kind of one of those things that is just sticking in my head. I know I should not be worrying as much as I am after everything you have all told me. If anyone else wants to give feedback on this I will appreciate it.

ACinKC · « **Reply #33 on:** January 19, 2007, 11:06:38 am »

They will all say the same thing they have been saying scared. I dont think it matters how often we say it. We cant get that out of your head for you. Please seek help outside this forum.

Ann · « **Reply #34 on:** January 19, 2007, 11:37:50 am »

Scared,

You have NOT had a risk in anything you bring to this forum. If you need a test result to be able to believe us, then go test and collect your negative result.

Ann

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #35 on:** January 20, 2007, 10:55:41 am »

Hi Everyone

I read that having inflamed gums or cuts increases the risk of transmission through cunnilingus. Is there any truth in this.

ACinKC · « **Reply #36 on:** January 20, 2007, 11:47:51 am »

Scared, please seek the help of a mental health professional and stop coming here with trumped up reasons as to why you think you have something. Quit asking questions and just test. You'll be happily negative.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #37 on:** January 20, 2007, 03:30:42 pm »

Thank You AC

I am just really nervous about the "what if's" and all that, even though you have all been very helpful in addressing my risks. I just have to wait it out. But I never did get an answer to that question, would that make a difference or not with the inflammed gums and such?

Thanks Everyone, Hopefully my next post on here will be with the negative results,god willing.

ACinKC · « **Reply #38 on:** January 20, 2007, 10:15:24 pm »

You would have to have a massively fresh cut or SEVERE dental problems to have any type of theoretical risk. Not to mention fresh blood or semen from the HIV pos person.

You have none of these scenarios and do NOT need to worry.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #39 on:** January 22, 2007, 09:12:13 am »

Thanks Everyone for your replies, the "what if's" have gotten ahold of me, but I probably need to shake that myself. I keep seeing different sites saying some risk, or low risk, or negliable risk. But all of you have said no risk. I am just so scared about what I might of done to my family and myself. I keep telling myself that there has never been a case documented, but then it comes back as what if I am the first? I just hope that I will come out of this OK.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #40 on:** January 22, 2007, 11:08:44 am »

Why do some sites say it has a low risk and some say no or therotical risk??

ACinKC · « **Reply #41 on:** January 22, 2007, 11:55:08 am »

You are not the first and we cannot control what other sites say. We give grounded medically backed scientifically proven documentation as our advice.

You are experiencing what seems to me like alot of guilt. Please stop coming here with what if's. Youre not doing yourself any good.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #42 on:** January 22, 2007, 03:45:49 pm »

AC, you said I won't be the first? I thought no one has ever been documented by way of cunnilingus? Now I am freaked out all over again. Has there ever been cases of transmission in this way?

ACinKC · « **Reply #43 on:** January 22, 2007, 03:48:03 pm »

JESUS man thats what I said! YOU WILL NOT BE THE FIRST PERSON TO GET IT THIS WAY!

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #44 on:** January 23, 2007, 07:48:00 am »

Someone please help, it feels like I am going insane, I cant sleep, all I think about is what if, and I just can't shake this. Any input as to how to deal with this would be great.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #45 on:** January 23, 2007, 07:57:46 am »

Go see a therapist or other mental health professional.

You do not have an HIV problem. No way no how.

We've done what we can do for you. Just because your mind keeps coming up with more scary what ifs doesn't mean they have any basis in HIV-science. Because they don't.

Get yourself some help to deal with the emotional aspects of this situation. We cannot provide that for you here.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #46 on:** January 23, 2007, 05:10:57 pm »

Thank You Andy, I am just really nervous but I appreciate everyone stating the facts the way they have. The main reason I am nervous is because if I was Pos, I would not want to give it to my family, but from what you have all been saying, that should not even be a worry for me. I will try to cope with this until I can get a test so that my mind will finally realize the facts. Thanks again to everyone.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #47 on:** January 24, 2007, 06:55:13 am »

Im really freaked out this morning, I have 2 black dots on my lower lip, I do not know why they are there. Is this a symptom or not? And also, my dentist yesterday said that I need a deep cleaning on my gums, does that mean my oral health is not good enough to stop the transmission of HIV. I am so scared and keep thinking I will be that one, even though it seems unilkely. Please Help!!!

ACinKC · « **Reply #48 on:** January 24, 2007, 09:21:01 am »

If you think your positive then spend your own money and go test. We are not going to change what we've said.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #49 on:** January 24, 2007, 09:28:12 am »

I was hoping you wouldn't change the assesments I have gotten, I just wanted to know if that makes a difference in the assesments given or not. I don't know if the deep cleaning of my gums means that my risk was higher therotically or not, thats what I was asking.

ACinKC · « **Reply #50 on:** January 24, 2007, 09:31:00 am »

It does not.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #51 on:** January 24, 2007, 11:00:34 am »

Hi Andy

Can you give me your opinion on my latest post? AC was helpful but I would like a second on this.

Thanks

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #52 on:** January 24, 2007, 06:14:14 pm »

I hadn't herad any other responses on my post this morning so I thought I would post again. Can anyone give my their opinion on this??

RapidRod · « **Reply #53 on:** January 24, 2007, 06:17:48 pm »

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #54 on:** January 25, 2007, 09:05:26 am »

Can anyone please give me some insight on my posts from yesterday?

I still have had no solid replies

ACinKC · « **Reply #55 on:** January 25, 2007, 09:51:30 am »

It does not.<---that was a solid reply. Thanks.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #56 on:** February 12, 2007, 10:02:34 am »

Hi Everyone

I have been realizing everything everyone said was true and have been relatively ok until last week when I have been really sick with headaches, fever, and sore throat. Could this be symptoms of ARS?? or is my mind just playing tricks on me?? It was just wierd that it was in the same time frame as when ARS comes about that is worrying me.

Thanks Everyone

ACinKC · « **Reply #57 on:** February 12, 2007, 10:05:59 am »

Scaredandlonely,

You just listed off the symptoms of about 5 dozen other illnesses. You can reliably cross off HIV as one of those possibilities. Move on to other things and start crossing them off.

You did NOT have a risk! So keep these words in mind please....

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #58 on:** February 21, 2007, 10:15:26 am »

Good Morning Everyone

The last couple of days my wife has been horribly ill with fever, aches and runny nose, sore throat and Im afraid I might have given her something, even though you have all told me I did not have a risk. I know this is stupid and Im sorry to keep posting but I cannot get this out of my head. Also when I went to the dentist the did say I had very mild periodontal disease and I had a deep cleaning which will take care of that. I would have had this at my time of exposure however, and my question is would that make this a situation to worry, or am I just being a "worried well". Please respond, and I promise I will try to avoid this forum again until I get my results.

Thanks Everyone

RapidRod · « **Reply #59 on:** February 21, 2007, 10:33:34 am »

You are just a worried well. If your wife is ill take her to a doctor. You did not have a risk.

Ann · « **Reply #60 on:** February 21, 2007, 10:38:48 am »

scared,

You didn't have a risk, and you can't pass on what you don't have.

Ann

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #61 on:** April 10, 2007, 10:23:56 am »

Hello Again

I have setup testing for Monday as that will be my 13 week mark, and all the fears and doubts have come back. I have been reading everyday, but I am still confused why cunnilingus is so much of a lower risk than a blowjob. I am trying to tell myself that I am just worrying myself to no good point, but that thought is still there. Any support or comments would be appreciated. Thank you to all who have helped me, I am just praying everyday that Monday will go well (even though all of you have said I dont even need to test). I am usually a hypocondriac when it comes to anything, so with this it has been amped up about 100%. Thanks for your patience.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #62 on:** April 10, 2007, 12:54:22 pm »

Good luck with your test and the inevitable negative result.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #63 on:** April 12, 2007, 08:51:54 am »

Hello Again Everyone

I am waiting until Monday to take my test, but my mind is going 100 miles an hour thinking about this. I keep thinking what happened over and over again and keep thinking, 'what if somehow I got hiv from this?" I am really concerned, but maybe that is because I am close to finding out 1 way or another. My question is this. Has there ever been a case where any of you have seen or heard where someone had gotten HIV from just 3 minutes or so of cunnilingus??

Ann · « **Reply #64 on:** April 12, 2007, 10:55:28 am »

scared,

Never.

Ann

ACinKC · « **Reply #65 on:** April 12, 2007, 12:11:06 pm »

Never EVER.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #66 on:** April 13, 2007, 10:38:08 am »

Hello Everyone

I cant take it anymore so I will be going today to get the test. It will be the oraquik test so I will know today, one way or another. Thank you everyone who has responded, and hopefully you will all be right and I will post a negative result today. Thanks Again.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #67 on:** April 13, 2007, 02:12:09 pm »

ok, that is a sign that today wouldve been a bad day to get tested. The office first lost my file, then they did not have the lab technician today so they COULDN'T do the test today. LOL. Anyways, I will have to stick with Monday, but talking to the doctors they pretty much confirmed what you have all been saying that it is low risk, they didn't say no risk, I dont know why, but they didn't. One question though, is the Oral test just as good as any other one to determine results? I will have to wait it out until Monday, but hopefully Monday will be better than today, at least at their office.

Thanks Everyone

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #68 on:** April 14, 2007, 09:06:17 am »

Hi Everyone

I did not get a response to my question yesterday so I thought I would repost. Is the Orasure test just as good as any other testing or is there another test I should take??

Thanks Everyone

Ann · « **Reply #69 on:** April 14, 2007, 09:08:28 am »

scared,

Orasure is an approved, accurate test.

Ann

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #70 on:** April 18, 2007, 11:32:58 am »

Hi Everyone

I went and got tested yesterday and they did a full STD battery. The wierd thing is that they did a Orasure test , but they told me they did not process lab tests there and it would be 2 weeks for results!! Now I am worried sick, because I have to wait another 2 weeks to find out the results. Is this normal?? I am just concerned that I will be the "unlucky one" to get it in this therotical way. I pray that I am not.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #71 on:** April 18, 2007, 06:58:46 pm »

Can anyone answer my questions from the previous post?? Thanks in advance.

Ann · « **Reply #72 on:** April 18, 2007, 07:12:06 pm »

scared,

Yes, it's perfectly normal for an hiv test to take two weeks to process.

You didn't have a risk, so don't think we're going to entertain you every day for the next two weeks while you wait for your negative result to come through. Go get busy with your life.

Ann

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #73 on:** April 29, 2007, 01:52:54 pm »

Hello Everyone

I get my results on Tuesday and I am really nervous about them. I dont know why since I have recieved such good advice about this. I just hope everything goes well on Tuesday. Thank you for this site, as it has been a relief and comfort to me. I hope on Tuesday Im come back here with a negative result.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #74 on:** April 30, 2007, 06:51:06 pm »

Well heres where all the " Told Ya So's" come in. I tested negative like everyone said. Thanks to all who helped me. I will not be back, only because I am moving on with my life. Thanks Again especially to Rod, Ann, Andy, and ACinKC. Im out!!!

RapidRod · « **Reply #75 on:** April 30, 2007, 08:19:07 pm »

OK, I don't have a problem saying it, "WE TOLD YOU SO." We get to do that quite a lot here.

naftalim · « **Reply #76 on:** May 01, 2007, 04:25:51 am »

GET AN HIV TEST. Regardless of this particular act, you could be infected and not even know it. If you are sexually active and from your story, you are not monogamous, you could have been exposed years ago. I was probably infected in 1999 and I only got tested in 2005 and tested positive. Turns out I have been infected since 1999. Luckily, as far as I have been able to tell, I have not infected anyone else.

RapidRod · « **Reply #77 on:** May 01, 2007, 04:42:04 am »

naftalim, before you post please read all the other posts and replies. Scared, did not have a risk and was told. They tested negative.

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #78 on:** June 11, 2007, 09:45:05 am »

Hi Everyone

I have been doing very well with everything, but now I am worried again. I have what looks like hairy leukoplakia and it is on the side of my tongue and inner cheeks. When I looked this up it all points to HIV infection, but I have a neg test result at more than 15 weeks, so I am doubting this is the case. Is it just me freaking out, or is there cause for another test? I have had this since 2 days after the incident in January in my cheeks but now it has gone to my tongue? Also, what else might cause this? Hopefully I am just being crazy but any input would sure be appreciated.

Thanks Everyone

RapidRod · « **Reply #79 on:** June 11, 2007, 09:50:35 am »

This is not an HIV concern. If you have concerns see your dentist or doctor.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #80 on:** June 11, 2007, 10:30:16 am »

Stop practicing medicine on yourself without a license. It's bad for your health.

You're HIV negative. Period. End of story.

As Rod suggested, if you have physical concerns that's something to discuss with your doctor.

Just because your head and feelings keep scaring you about HIV doesn't change the FACT that you have reliably tested negative for HIV. Period. Done.

Cheers,

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #81 on:** October 09, 2007, 11:15:59 am »

Hello Everyone

I am starting to move on, but I just wanted an answer to this question. The only act that I have perfrormed was the one in question from Jan which I tested over in Apr and was neg, but my wife and I are starting to plan for a baby, and this popped in my head again regarding should I get tested again just in case since some sites say 6 months and I only tested at around 4??? I just want to put this behind me and move on with my wife and family. Any input would be great.

Thanks Everyone

Ann · « **Reply #82 on:** October 09, 2007, 11:50:00 am »

Scared,

You do not need further testing. You ARE hiv negative. If you have a difficult time accepting your hiv negative status, then perhaps it's time you sought counseling. We cannot help you with that here.

Ann

scaredandlonely · « **Reply #83 on:** October 12, 2007, 06:20:19 pm »

Thank you for your input Ann.

I just wanted to get an answer before I started down this road. Thank you everyone who helped me through this. I really appreciate this. Wish me luck down the road of parenthood, again, now with no worries about this anymore

Andy Velez · « **Reply #84 on:** October 12, 2007, 06:31:12 pm »

Good luck on the road to parenthood. From my experience, parenting is the most challenging and the most worthwhile job in the world. It's no easy thing but it sure is worth the effort. My sons are the best!

Cheers,

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Author Topic: Very Scared about first time cunnilingus experience (Read 38131 times)