POZ Community Forums

HIV Prevention and Testing => Do I Have HIV? => Topic started by: SSkipper on July 23, 2008, 11:48:27 am

Title: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on July 23, 2008, 11:48:27 am
Hi Ann, Andy, Rod!  I have read this forum for quite sometime and refer to it to decide what is a safe activity and what is not.  I think I just need some yelling here from you guys on this scenario being a no risk in order to move on with my live. 

I went to a massage parlor in Montreal that specializes in the rub and tug only.  I got the rub and tug with a thai massage.  The girl sat naked on the back of my knees with some vaginal fluid contact , then on my thights and then on my chest.  There was fluid on all these parts from her vagina.  However, she had already rubbed me down with oil before.  While she was rubbing me with oil she also masturbated herself about twice for 10 seconds and then after rubbing her body and massaging me she grabbed my member and started to tug him.  My question here is that I had some genital warts at the time too, very small; but is there any relation for HIV virus passing through the vaginal fluid and into the warts and into my blood stream.  I had one small bump on the back of my knee that I noticed in the shower later and I was able to rip it off without any blood so I am guessing it was a blackhead.  But do any of these things translate to a risk?  The reason I ask is the next day I came down with a bad cold that lasted for like 2-3 weeks and a very sore throat (it was november too).  I also had swollen lymph nodes but I think that is part of the natural reaction of fighting a cold.  I just need some knowledge from the experts here if you would not mind.  There might have been fluid on her hands while rubbing my boy toy and also she had fluid contact with my skin.  Thanks for your help!
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: Ann on July 23, 2008, 12:08:11 pm
SS,

Being masturbated is not a risk for hiv infection, regardless whether there is vaginal fluid or warts or whatever. Neither is getting vaginal fluids on a blackhead or pimple. You haven't had a risk.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple. Read through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use them with confidence.

Ann
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on July 23, 2008, 12:12:55 pm
Thanks Ann, you are the best.  I love reading your blog.  I find it very inspirational.  I wanted to ask a followup.  Have there been any reported cases to date about a hand to genital HIV contraction story or something along those lines?  For some reason I came accross a forum where a lady claimed to work at a health clinic for HIV and she said she saw a few cases of people catching HIV through a handjob and that made me scared.
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on July 23, 2008, 12:16:40 pm
Also sorry to ask this, but do you think the flu and cough next day was just a coincidence of catching the flu?  ARS symptoms don't come that quick right?
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: Andy Velez on July 23, 2008, 04:20:11 pm
You absolutely were not at risk for HIV transmission during this recent incident.

As for what "some lady" reported and other such hearsay, that's total nonsense. But such stories abound and continue to scare people even though such tales are totally without any basis in HIV science.

Your cough and all that stuff? Discuss that with your doctor if they persist. They have nothing to do with HIV. And should you ever have a real risk such as unprotected vanginal or anal intercourse -- which I hope you won't -- in such instances you would not be generating symptoms so quickly.
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on July 23, 2008, 04:46:55 pm
Thank you very much guys.  You know before I came to this forum I had no understanding of what HIV was and I hadn't given it a face.  Most of the time the misinformation that is out there leads you to believe it is only for drug users or those with same sex preferences; however, after meeting you guys and reading about you I have begun to realize that is not the case.  I wish we had people like you teaching us back in elementary and middle school when it was important to learn about this stuff.  Those people just used scared tactics.  You guys really do a great job out and here and I appreciate your answers so quickly to my questions.  I admire what you guys do.  Thank you.
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: Andy Velez on July 23, 2008, 09:23:52 pm
Skipper, I'm glad you found the help here that you needed.

You're right on target about the lack of appropriate education in the school system. Maybe as you go on in your life you will find opportunities to support your ideas about what should be taught. It would certainly make a difference because so many infections happen through just the lack of knowledge you talked about. I don't want anyone else to get infected and I find it especially heartbreaking when young people find themselves infected, because HIV is forever. Which many of them just don't realize.

All the best to you,
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on July 24, 2008, 09:35:01 am
Thanks Andy.  I hope I will be able to make myself more knowledgeable about HIV and teach young people about safe and unsafe practices.  I hope there is something we can do to break the stigma that is in our soceity surrounding HIV today.  I recall working at an ER and seeing one HIV patient coming in and the nurses suited up with gloves and the works (which they normally don't do) because they said "you know she's got HIV, you should stay out of the room."  At that point I felt kind of sad because after my limited research on it I have learned that it has never been airborn or transmitted from skin to skin.  Granted i had fear about the massage parlor experience.  I hope one day I can help educate the young and old on this virus.  Thanks again guys for everything.  Give my regards to RapidRod, I always find his personality to be great too!
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on August 04, 2008, 12:59:33 pm
Hi Guys,

Sorry anxiety is getting the best of me so I called up these people called AAR testing to setup a test for HIV.  The incident that I described was back in November so I think it is now 6 months since it so I can test.  However last year in June for the first time I got an STD screen and HIV was negative using the Orasure 1/2 test.  It took 30 minutes and they gave me the result.  This guy on the phone who I was talking to told me they don't do the rapid result because it is only 65-85% accurate.  Can anyone comment on this?  I didn't realize it was not that accurate.  They are charging me to get some test that will have a WB confirmation test.  Does anybody know anything about this?  I am kind of wondering that what if I had a false negative with the OraSure.
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: Ann on August 04, 2008, 01:10:19 pm
SS,

The rapid tests are prone to false POSITIVE results, so stop worrying about your negative result. Their accuracy rate is way higher than what you've been quoted.

You only need WB confirmation if your ELISA is positive. If they're charging you for a WB before it's even deemed necessary, it sounds like you're getting ripped off.

There's a link to our Testing Lesson in the Welcome Thread (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=220.0) if you want more info on the tests.

Ann
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on August 04, 2008, 02:17:22 pm
So guys I went for it...paid 119 bucks and they drew blood.  I get to find out tomorrow...I'm freaking out here.  Any words of comfort Ann, Andy, Rod?  How is RapidRod and Matty?  I haven't seen them respond to anything lately?
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: Ann on August 04, 2008, 03:51:48 pm
SS,

What do you need words of comfort for? You didn't have a risk and unless you've been having unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse that you've neglected to tell  us about, you are not going to get anything other than a negative result.

The only words of comfort I have for you are - I'm so sorry you wasted 119 bucks on a totally unecessary test. Wish I had money to burn like that.

Ann

Ann
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on August 04, 2008, 05:07:15 pm
I guess more than comfort I need to deal with the guilt of participating in this activity....I am married and love my wife and i cannot understand why I did something like this.  I guess its less fear for myself but fear for perhaps causing any harm to the one i love.  Perhaps most of us who post on here have issues dealing with the true cause for the anxiety.  I have told you the truth about the only activities I participated in.  My wife and i last year both got tested and saw each others results.  Even with her i use a condom still for birth control.
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: Ann on August 04, 2008, 06:23:54 pm
SS,

We cannot help you with your guilt here - see a counselor for that.

In the meantime, you got a rub and tug. Get over it.

Ann
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on August 05, 2008, 09:57:36 am
You guys are right.  I need to go get counseling.  I find out my results today and will let you know too.  I apologize if I have made any of you upset over my comments.
Title: Re: Massage, Handjob, Vaginal Fluid...Need to Yelled at Here
Post by: SSkipper on August 05, 2008, 03:30:49 pm
NEGATIVE GUYS!!!!  OMG!!!  I am so happy and relieved.  Ann you should have just told me this was a no risk event and I wouldn't have wasted my money :)  Kidding.  No I just wanted to make sure, we want to have a baby and I don't want to do anything to jepordize that with my wife.  I just have this stupid cough that doesnt go away and it scared me.  Thanks for all your help guys.  You guys are awesome.