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Author Topic: Emptysoul  (Read 4647 times)

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Offline Emptysoul

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Emptysoul
« on: February 22, 2017, 07:28:30 am »
Confirmed positive two days ago.

Thought I would have a story to tell, then I realized I have no stories left to tell once I carried the virus.

I had only 3 days of abnormal sickness right after New Year, then I was completely fine until two days ago - I ate a lot, physically active, friggin energized and all. Now since the confirmation I can't sleep well, can't eat well, dealing with all sorts of crazy thoughts, and all the voices and bullshit in my head.

"Keep a positive mind" My boss said.
"I will always be positive now" I replied.
More that I tell myself to stay happy and to stay live, the crazier I get.
I'm 25 and 95% of my life wasn't happy anyways.
« Last Edit: February 22, 2017, 07:36:48 am by JimDublin »

Offline Jim Allen

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Emptysoul
« Reply #1 on: February 22, 2017, 07:36:19 am »
Hi

Welcome to the forum, sorry to hear you tested positive.
Its not a big life changer but it just means getting onto treatment and life goes on.

So you had an initial test blood test result and than a confirmation testing completed?  What treatment options have been presented to you and when is the next follow-up?

Jim
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Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #2 on: February 22, 2017, 09:02:43 am »
You are not alone. We are here for you and no matter how discouraged you maybe right now, life is going on.  Make sure you get a good connection going with a doctor, someone you can work with in partnership.  That will keep you healthy and help you to realize you're going to be ok.

You can always come here to ask questions about anything or to talk about whatever is on your mind.

We're here for you.
Andy Velez

Offline Emptysoul

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #3 on: February 22, 2017, 10:42:22 am »
Hi

Welcome to the forum, sorry to hear you tested positive.
Its not a big life changer but it just means getting onto treatment and life goes on.

So you had an initial test blood test result and than a confirmation testing completed?  What treatment options have been presented to you and when is the next follow-up?

Jim


Yeah. Nothing. Lab test on the 3rd, if my mental health would hold....

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #4 on: February 22, 2017, 11:51:00 am »
Hi

Okay can you come back with some details because we are trying to help.
How did you test positive and what following testing was done?

Did you have your CD4 results or VL in and when you say the 3rd is that an appointment for meds with the doctor or is that for the results from the 2nd round of HIV testing?

Have you spoken to anyone about this, or been offered counselling?

End of the day life goes on as normal with HIV, you pay your bills, go to work, have a career if you like, get married if your into marriage etc etc, expect to live a long and boring life, HIV itself is simply not a big game changer at all.

Jim
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
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Offline Emptysoul

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #5 on: February 23, 2017, 10:15:31 am »
Hi

Okay can you come back with some details because we are trying to help.
How did you test positive and what following testing was done?

Did you have your CD4 results or VL in and when you say the 3rd is that an appointment for meds with the doctor or is that for the results from the 2nd round of HIV testing?

Have you spoken to anyone about this, or been offered counselling?

End of the day life goes on as normal with HIV, you pay your bills, go to work, have a career if you like, get married if your into marriage etc etc, expect to live a long and boring life, HIV itself is simply not a big game changer at all.

Jim

I went for a rapid test on 27th Jan. The guy who administrated it would have concluded it as negative, but there was a very faint line, that you cant see without tilting the angle and put it under the light.

So he suggested me to go for a confirmation test at the public clinic.

And the results came back a few days ago.

So I will have to go back on the 3rd to take more blood sample, for the CD4 counts and VL stuff I guess.

I get it when people try to talk to you about having HIV while living like a normal person. It's funny how then I asked the nurse if I can do this and that, she said "I wouldn't advise", so I asked "What's so normal now?", and she went silent. Normal people dont normally get HIV, I guess.

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #6 on: February 23, 2017, 11:04:07 am »
Hi

Well for the moment until that next appointment and results I will ask you kindly to keep your posts and thought in this one thread so we can better help you.

Look 1 nurse does not know what normal is, gosh what is normal for her might be abnormal to me.

All I tell you is living with HIV is just that living, I take a pill a day and live goes on, no drama at all, and everything is normal as it was before.

What is you fear to be ask? How do you think you life is changing as mine did not change so help me understand the concern.

Jim
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

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Threads

Offline Tonny2

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #7 on: February 23, 2017, 09:57:26 pm »


        OJO       HELLO EMPTYSOUL, HOPEFULLY, PRETTY SOON, YOU WILL BE CHANGING YOUR USER'S NAME...OH MY GOSH, THAT NURSE IS AN IGNORANT PERSON, "NORMAL PEOPLE DON'T GET HIV", WHAT THE F$%^ SHE KNOWS ABOUT WHAT IS NORMAL.

I WAS 25 WHEN INFECTED (ALTHOUGH I GOT MY CONFIRMATION SEVEN YEARS LATER, LONG STORY), YOU WILL BE FINE, IT TAKES A LITTLE BIT OF TIME TO DIGEST THE BAD NEWS. I FELT THE SAME WAY YOU ARE FEELING NOW, THIS WAS 22 YEARS AGO, WHEN GETTING AN HIV DIAGNOSIS WAS STILL CONSIDER A DEATH SENTENCE, I'M STILL HERE, SO WILL YOU, MAYBE EVEN FOR MUCH LONGER TIME, MEDICATIONS NOWADAYS, ARE GREAT, JUST ONE PILL A DAY, IT'S ALL IT TAKES TO HAVE THE VIRUS UNDER CONTROL, SO YOU CAN TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR "NORMAL" LIFE...YOU CAN STILL DO WHAT YOU USED TO DO BEFORE, JUST SOME CHANGES IN YOUR SEXUAL LIFE...PLEASE, TAKE IT EASY, TRY TO RELAX, THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS THAT YOU KNOW YOU HAVE IT, NOW YOU TREAT IT...PLEASE KEEP US POSTED AND WE ARE HERE FOR YOU, AH!, PLEASE, DO NOT LISTEN TO THE NURSE, IF I WERE YOU, I WOULD LET THE DOCTOR KNOW ABOUT THE NURSE'S IGNORANT COMMENTS...WE ARE HERE FOR INFORMATION AND SUPPORT...BEST OF LUCK...HUGS
                                                                                                                 OJO

Offline mecch

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  • red pill? or blue pill?
Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #8 on: February 24, 2017, 09:06:53 am »
OP, what country, please?

There are plenty of crappy nurses around so don't take your safe sex guidelines and lifestyle guidelines from a nurse, please.

Get it all from HIV+ people, a good website like this, and a trusted doctor.

Well the cats out of the bag but wondering why your boss know this fact, so fast.
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline Emptysoul

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #9 on: February 24, 2017, 09:28:54 am »
Poor editing. The nurse didn't say that. I said it myself.

Offline Tonny2

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #10 on: February 24, 2017, 01:51:11 pm »


       ojo     hi empty...well, i guess, i'm pretty normal and i got aids/hiv, i'm sure you are normal too...please relax, it will get better with time, you will feel normal again
                                                                                                                         ojo

Offline mecch

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #11 on: February 25, 2017, 12:53:41 pm »
OK, good to know.  I remember some hideous nurse stories especially in the 80s and 90s.
“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Offline harleymc

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #12 on: February 25, 2017, 04:54:05 pm »
Great news that you have been diagnosed and linked with with care. That's fantastic.
Go and smack this virus about.

As for not being 'normal'. Well there's some 35+ million people on this planet and their families and work colleagues and friends who would disagree with you. Stigmatise yourself if you must but don't stigmatise others.

Offline ack55

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Re: Emptysoul
« Reply #13 on: April 07, 2017, 12:17:32 am »
It is sad how many practitioners are insensitive or completely ill informed. I have experienced a lot of this. If you can, go to a clinic or somewhere that the people working specialize in HIV and you will feel A LOT BETTER. It's so difficult to deal with a new diagnosis when you have negative medical experiences. No one deserves that. It's not easy to feel "normal" after first being diagnosed. I definitely didn't. But after speaking with a specialist for the first time, I left the hospital with the biggest smile on my face and knew that my life was far from over and despite difficulties, everything was going to be okay. You don't have to be happy right now and you're entitled to experience every feeling, but just know that it gets better.

 


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