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worried.. need reassurance.

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hello all you lovely and helpful people.

I had posted about 2 yrs ago, becuase of what I thought was a risky encounter and everyone here was so caring and loving, that it really helped me get through that horrible period of worrying.

Anyways, I'm back, and stupid as ever :)

I'm a 24/m and basically this is what happened. I hadn't had sex in over 2 years, and lets just say i was getting a bit frustrated. So one night, after having a few too many drinks, one of my friends decided to take me to a brothel here in India. Now, I do not know what I was thinking, but I went in anyways.

I wore one condom, and proceeded to receive oral from the prostitue, after which she put on another condom over the existing one and we had intercourse.. for maybe 10 mins or so.. i kept pulling out to check if it was broken coz i was very paranoid.. eventually i decided to stop, and she took off one of the condoms, and gave me oral after which i "manually" jerked myself off while the condom was still on. I then took it off, washed up quickly and went home.

Now, as far as I know, there was definitely no breakage.. but I have always known that 2 condoms is risky coz they can easily break because of the friction.. but as far as I know, neither of them broke.

The other problem i have, is I have panic attacks/anxiety, so I am really worried about this. I conjure up all the horrific thoughts, thinking that maybe there were minute pore like holes caused by the friction of the 2 condoms.. which could lead to an infection. It was a stupid thing to do, but now i'm living in a worried well. All my friends say, that I wore a condom, so I was protected.. but I'm worried about that maybe there were small holes, or if some fluids seeped in through the ring somehow..

Anyways, that's what happened.. and I know in my mind I should be ok, but am still worried since I put myself at risk. Either that, or the 2 condoms actually gave me 2x protection? I am cirumsized as well, which I hear reduces risk. It's been almost 2 1/2 weeks since the incident. I don't really feel symptoms, but since i worry a lot, i get scared that i might feel a flu coming on and then it's a downward spiral from there! Hypochondriacs should not go to prostitutes!! :)

So, any comments would be great.




Relax, you didn't have a risk. It is true that two condoms used at the same time will increase the risk of breakage, but yours didn't. When a condom breaks it is very obvious. Forget about tiny holes, it doesn't happen. Think of popping a balloon - a broken condom is similar. It's very obvious.

Please read through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

You didn't have a risk and you do not need to test over this specific incident.


Hey Ann :)

Thanks for your reply. I checked out the links, v helpful.

however, she put the condom on me, so I was assuming she knew what she was doing. I've had condoms break on me before (the reason for my freak out 2 yrs ago) so I know what it feels like..

So, you sure i'm ok? I just need to let this one go... it's not doing me any good. Also, I got into a bad car accident 2 nights ago (thankfully no one was injured) and i'm still shaken up from that.. so the stress of that plus this is enough to already have this year off to a bad start for me! It sucks being scared.

I just want to be happy again, without worrying about this. And Ann, people like you and others on this forum really help put me at ease. I know it is annoying to keep repeating things over again, but reassurances do a world of good.

Thanks again, and hope you have a beautiful day.


Andy Velez:
You weren't at risk for HIV in this situation other than the potential for doubling condoms to cause breakage. Avoid that in the future if you choose to have intercourse. A single latex condom will provide very effective protection against HIV transmission.

Also to be avoided is having casual sex when you have been drinking excessively. It's a dangerous combination that clouds your ability to think clearly about safer sex.

Sexuality is a natural part of life. You can enjoy it when you like and with whomever you choose to be with. Just always do it the safer way, which means a condom everytime when having intercourse.

If you find you are still anxious about this incident and about sex in general then I suggest you see a therapist or other professional to talk about the emotional aspects of your concerns. Life is too short at best to spend worrying unnecessarily.


Hey Andy,

Thanks for the reply. Very very good advice that I will most definitely heed.

So, even though I wore 2 condoms which was risky, you still think it should be fine?


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