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Author Topic: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?  (Read 6765 times)

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Offline jeffsmith

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unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« on: January 27, 2007, 07:48:36 PM »
I hope I am able to send this correctly.
I want to say thanks for such a valuable website.
I looked at some archival information on this website, but it seems more for people who are heterosexual...and was not able to find a situation similar to mine....or I am not terribly saavy in doing so.

I had, what anyone would call a significant risk back on Jan 2nd of this year. I am a male and I received receptive anal sex w/o the use of a condom. Though the penetrating partner did NOT ejaculate inside of me, I was wondering what sort of risk there was involved.

He claimed to have been tested back in Oct 06, and when I spoke to him via phone later that week he claimed that he could show verified results that he was..and seemed indignant otherwise for having to prove himself (for I asked him the night we had sex as well).  I never had sex w/o a condom and I definitely would NEVER again.

We had mutually masturbated earlier that night, and I noticed little or no pre-seminal fluid involved. If he produced little or no pre-cum when I received the unprotected anal, would this help further reduce the risk?

My understanding after reading numerous sites that the risk of contracting HIV through this incident is like 1/200 possibility. Not very good odds I guess….

I was considering to test using the PCR-DNA test with a designated lab, but are curious to see what or if this is a particular method to choose. Would a six week test be accurate enough to provide some peace-of-mind?

Being all honest, I have had no symptoms related to ARS, as many people on here claim to have had or have.

Thanks for the information/incite…..if anyone has had or known anyone that has had similar situation, please provide your valuable 2 cents.

Thanks.
and please, no sarcasm.....I have had enough guilt over this..and the stupidity is killing me enough.

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #1 on: January 27, 2007, 07:55:50 PM »
My apologies...
I forgot to mention that he tested negative in Oct 06.
Sorry.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #2 on: January 27, 2007, 08:00:06 PM »
Don't concern his test with you. You need to test. Forget the PCR DNA test, it's not a diagnostic test. Get your first test if need be at 6 weeks and your conclusive test at 13 weeks.

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #3 on: January 27, 2007, 08:47:03 PM »
"Don't concern his test with you. "

umm...yeah it does.  If he was negative now, I am negative.  I have not had sex in a year. and was tested after the previous time I had sex.


 "Forget the PCR DNA test, it's not a diagnostic test."

No, it indeed is not. But is used in hospitals as a detection infection instrument to see if pre-natal mothers are HIV+.  It is the same as a NAAT test, or a branch of it. (Blood banks use it). It may be expensive, but I am willing to assume the cost for sanity.  And many places say that they are non-approving of this test, but many labs offer it.

Offline thunter34

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #4 on: January 27, 2007, 08:59:03 PM »
I'm curious why you are coming here for advice if you seem kind of dead set on challenging the advice given to you.  The advice Rod gave was accurate:  don't concern his test with you.  Having unprotected receptive anal sex was somewhat of a risk, therefore this factor or that factor is just muddling the issue.  To know conclusively for yourself, you need to get a test-  one at 6 weeks (for preliminary peace of mind) and one at 13 weeks for a conclusive result.

And I'm puzzled why you'd want to go the long (and more expensive) way around with the testing.  Again, Rod was right about the diagnostic test.  Just get a regular test like everyone else.  Opting for a flashier type of test isn't going to effect your risk.  You can't impress the virus into not being there. 

AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #5 on: January 27, 2007, 09:05:53 PM »
For starters, ...I still will test @ 6 weeks and 12 weeks.

(2) I have a tendency of not trusting a "forum member", nonetheless one who has the face of a human on a dog's body.

(3) I was seeking the advice from anyone else who had a similar situation...apparently he did not.

(4) I wanted advice from the actual people who run the website....not a humanimal.


Offline thunter34

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #6 on: January 27, 2007, 09:22:12 PM »
For starters, Rod is extremely qualified to answer your questions...and did so.  You just refused to accept what he had to say

(2.)  Judging the caliber advice someone gives by an avatar picture makes about the same amount of sense as judging your own status by someone else's alleged test results.

(3.)  What makes you think he doesn't have a grasp of your situation?  ''Apparently he did not'' based on what?  He gave sound advice that you just didn't want to hear.  So did I.

(4.)  If you only wanted to hear from someone who runs the website, you should have said so...you did not.  You addressed it to ''anyone''.  That would include Mo's like me and humanimals like Rod.

Don't know what you have against Rod's pic anyway.  I think he looks quite fetching. 

I am glad to hear that you will test at 6 and 12 weeks.  That should do you fine...and you will likely be ok from this incident. 
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #7 on: January 27, 2007, 09:35:51 PM »
Thanks for your kind input.
I know you were not being rude.

Nontheless,
I have ceased having faith in the gay community and will never have anymore, nor support the cause.
Strange dichotomy why so many spread the virus when they have it, yet they know they have it.

This sexperience has made me lose faith in humanity and questions people's motives.
Indeed i was just at fault for having irresponsible sex with someone who claims to be negative, and who knows...maybe he is.

Nevertheless, no more sex for me.
But anyways,..I do not want to get on a soap box, I will stick to the purpose of why I am here....my risk.





Offline RapidRod

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #8 on: January 27, 2007, 09:39:17 PM »
You've been given the answers, you need to test. End of subject. No more discussion needed.

Offline FiercenBed

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #9 on: January 27, 2007, 09:42:18 PM »
uuuuhhhh.....jeffsmith......i think ur on the wrong web site. i think u should excuse ur self and find 'nother site to vent! >:(

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #10 on: January 28, 2007, 08:54:22 AM »
Jeff, let's not get sidetracked here. The basic issue which brought you here is that you had unprotected intercourse and so you need to accurately establish what your HIV status is.

Although it's great when you have responsible sex partners who play safer, ultimately YOU are responsible for your own health. You can have all the intercourse you want to and with as many partners are you like ONLY the insertive partner always has to be wearing a condom. Otherwise you're putting your life at risk. It's as simple and as stark as that. So you need to learn from this experience.

As far as going by someone else's anecdotal report about their status or even if they show you and HIV negative test result from the day you were having sex, that doesn't matter. That person could have had unsafe sex  days before being with you and be infected without knowing it. So it's YOUR test result that matters.

Condoms are a must no matter whom you are with and no matter what you think you know about their sexual history or how great the person looks.

Given this was a single incident without ejaculation the odds are in your favor against transmission. But better odds are not the same as no risk, so instead of putting your energy into complaining and railing at others,  just make sure you always take whatever steps you need to protect yourself.

Good luck with your test result. Fingers crossed here. 
Andy Velez

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #11 on: January 28, 2007, 12:05:54 PM »
 My apologies to others...I had been in a rare and upsetting mood due to my stupidity.

And thanks Andy, for a superb reply.

I will test @ 6 weeks and 12....hopefully the 6 weeks test will put some residual fears, anger, and resentment aside (against myself) for this foolish mistake.
After a year being single, I thought I could go into a "possible" relationship....only finding out that this one too was a player.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #12 on: January 28, 2007, 12:09:59 PM »
The overwhelming number of those who are going to seroconvert will do so within 4-6 weeks after an exposure to the HIV virus. So assuming you test negative at 6 weeks that will be very encouraging and would point to the likelihood that you will continue to test negative at 12-13 weeks. (The CDC recommends 13 weeks but 12 weeks is accepted as reliable in many countries).

I'm glad you found the exchange to be helpful. Good luck. 
Andy Velez

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #13 on: January 28, 2007, 12:16:27 PM »
P.S.

Does a Home Access kit qualify as a legitimate means of testing for the 6 and 12 weeks?

Thanks....and yes..."good" luck is needed.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #14 on: January 28, 2007, 12:22:52 PM »
The Home Access Test is the ONLY FDA-approved home test. So yes, you can use it with assurance of reliability. 
Andy Velez

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #15 on: January 28, 2007, 08:09:22 PM »
General, curious question...

What is the estimated time-frame for ARS?  If I were infected, what would/should I look for?
I do know, after reading some archival info. that symptoms are not a clear indication and regardless testing is needed.  Can ARS come to fruition weeks from now? or is there a general sero-conversion time for onset?

Thanks.
J.

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #16 on: January 29, 2007, 09:07:04 PM »
Just wanted to apologize to anyone I offended the other day...especially the rapid dog and thunderman:)
I know...I am a "doink".


"J".

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #17 on: January 29, 2007, 10:23:14 PM »
No, there is nothing to "look for" symptomatically, either in the presence or absence of same. Only an HIV test done at the proper time will give you the answer you're looking for.

The average time to seroconversion is 22 days. All but the smallest number seroconvert within 4-6 weeks.

Get productively busy in your life and the waiting time to get tested will pass way faster than you can imagine at this moment. Really.

 
Andy Velez

Offline jeffsmith

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  • Posts: 20
Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #18 on: February 04, 2007, 04:09:26 PM »
Does the fact that the providing partner does not ejaculate diminish the possibility of HIV infection?
I was reading on medhelp.com that this Dr. Handsfield regards pre-cum as a theoretical risk....and not a practical risk.
I would only be curious.
In reality, how many men or woman would or could be possibly infected with HIV through pre-seminal fluids?
Whether it be vaginal or anal?

Just a thought.  comments?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #19 on: February 04, 2007, 04:19:10 PM »
That is not a thought that concerns us of the number of persons infected by precum. What concerns us is having unprotected anal and vaginal sex without the use of condom with multiple partners. Pre-cum is not  theoretical, it has been documented with anal and vaginal exposure.

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #20 on: February 04, 2007, 04:25:38 PM »
In light of what you state, wouldn't there indeed be a much higher incidence of HIV with gay men if pre-seminal fluids  did infect.  Undertstandeably, it is high (nonetheless higher than the hetero community), but being a one-time incident and very little pre-seminal fluids do diminish the availabilty to become infected (man or woman).

Would not common sense state that ...the lesser the semen (pre-sminal fluid), the lower the risk?
I would think so.
And yes, I do know rapid rod, "no sex is safe-sex"....and condom-protected sex is always the "Safest".

Offline RapidRod

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #21 on: February 04, 2007, 04:40:04 PM »
As long as you know that Jeff Smith, then an assessment forum is of no use to you.

Offline Ann

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #22 on: February 04, 2007, 05:34:45 PM »
Jeff,

There's not a lot of point comparing heterosexual vs gay transmission - there are actually more heterosexuals infected world wide than gay men.

There is no way of knowing how high a person's seminal viral load is (without lab testing) and the seminal viral load will differ from the serum viral load. The precum of one hiv positive man might not be as infectious as another's. In general, precum, deposited inside a anus or vagina, is just as risky as cum.

The bottom line here is that you must use condoms for anal penetration. You cannot count on the lack of ejaculation to protect you.

You already know you've had a real risk and you need to test. You have one more week to wait for a six week result. I sincerly hope you come out of this ok and learn from the experience.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Good luck and keep us posted.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline RapidRod

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #23 on: February 05, 2007, 01:08:04 PM »
Quote
Re: suck the ass
« Reply #18 on: Today at 12:41:36 PM »   

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
jeffsmith, keep all your thought and questions in your own thread. Do not post anything in anyone elses thread. 


Quote
From: jeffsmith on: Today at 12:45:52 PM
 
hmm....from that last I read...you are a "member" only person?
yeah...again...bias...and no less in an AIDS forum....go figure.

 
That's how the forum works here. If you don't like it, discuss it with Peter, Ann and Andy. Everyone that answers questions in the "Am I Infected" forum have had HIV for several years or are employed in HIV research.

Offline Ann

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #24 on: February 05, 2007, 02:11:43 PM »
Jeff,

We do not allow people who are going through their own hiv transmission worries to answer questions in this forum. A person in that position has no credibility here and that's just the way of it. We ask that you keep ALL your questions or comments in your own thread, ONLY.

There are plenty of other internet forums you can go to if you don't like the way this one is run.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Oh, and by the way. A person doesn't have to be hiv positive to answer questions here. However, if you had the required level of understanding of hiv transmission and testing, you wouldn't be here asking questions.


Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline jessie30

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #25 on: February 23, 2007, 07:33:07 PM »
Thanks Ann.


Offline Ann

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #26 on: February 23, 2007, 07:35:58 PM »
Please return to your origninal account. It has been reactivated and the password will work again.
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #27 on: February 27, 2007, 10:19:38 PM »
Hi All,

Got tested 6 weeks ...negative.
I used the Home Access kit. Somewhat reliable indicator?
Yes, aware of the need to retest @ 12 weeks.

Thanks.

J.

BTW...Andy, cool new pic.....go to a wedding? or get hitched?  :)   
« Last Edit: February 27, 2007, 10:27:26 PM by jeffsmith »

Offline tigger2376

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #28 on: February 27, 2007, 10:41:29 PM »
Glad for you, but this reiterates what was said by some very wise and experienced people
I know i'm going to enjoy the party in the afterlife, but do you all mind that I'm going to be VERY late!!!

Offline jeffsmith

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Tested @ 8 weeks.
« Reply #29 on: March 11, 2007, 09:47:06 AM »
Andy,

Just wanted you to know I tested negative @ 8 weeks with the Home Access testing.
I am hoping this is a projected outcome for my 12 week test.

Thanks.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #30 on: March 11, 2007, 10:03:17 AM »
Congrats on that happy test result, Jeff. Your hopes to continue to test negative are well grounded with a negative at 8 weeks. I expect you will test negative again.

Good luck.
Andy Velez

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #31 on: April 06, 2007, 07:05:27 AM »
Hello Everyone (Rapid, Ann, Andy, et. all)

I did a follow up on my risk. (unprotected anal with no ejaculation).
I was tested with Quest Labs. on April 2, 2007. Last risk was on Jan 9th. Have had no sex since then.
I tested for:
HIV - negative
HepB/HepC- negative
Syphilis-negative.

Since the last time was Jan 9th, and the testing was done 82 days later, is this o.k.?

Thanks for all you do on here.

Jeff

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #32 on: April 06, 2007, 07:07:48 AM »
Also, I was tested via Home Access at 8,10 and 11 weeks ...negative as well.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #33 on: April 06, 2007, 07:12:19 AM »
You're negative. Now just use the condoms. We don't want you here again or the "I Just Tested Poz" forum.

Offline jeffsmith

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #34 on: April 06, 2007, 07:17:33 AM »
Thanks Rodney,

I wish you, Ann, Andy, and others my best.
You ALL will be in my prayers for your health and continued effort to promote HIV awareness and prevention.

Thanks.

J.

Offline Ann

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Re: unprotected sex (anal) help anyone?
« Reply #35 on: April 06, 2007, 07:48:29 AM »
jeff,

Yes, you are hiv negative. Please, please make sure your top is using a condom in future, no exceptions until you're in a securely monogamous relationship where you have BOTH tested negative - after the window period - together. If you haven't already, make sure you read through the condom and lube links in my signature line. A correctly used condom rarely breaks.

Like Rodney, I also don't want to see you here - or in the Newly Diagnosed forum - again! ;) You were fortunate this time, please don't push your luck.

Ann


Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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