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Author Topic: " I do care, don't fuck me"  (Read 37118 times)

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #50 on: January 28, 2007, 12:14:54 pm »
Really trying to remember the topic due to the heated debates and I just commented in another thread how things were nice because you could have a disscussion w/o the insults...I should've known better.. ::)

I'm not out there pounding the pavement as an AIDS activist but I do feel you should take responsibilty for your actions when it comes to this virus. I think the bottomline is it starts with YOU. As I have said in previous posts, I don't disclose to anyone but then I haven't had sex with another in 2 years either. If I did, I would use a condom but still would not tell the other person. Now to some, it would still be considered a bad thing because of the what if situation as in what if the condom broke, etc. Yes, that is possible but what are the chances, anyone?

Someone mentioned I think in the other post about a person going out in a rage and just infecting people. I do know someone who is doing just that. Do I know if this person is actually poz, no, I do not but I do know of her sexual expertise, and it is rumored that she is. In a situation like this, what is the responsible thing to do? Should I just sit by and say nothing or should I talk to someone at the Health Dept? Or because of my choices in disclosure would I be considered just as bad as her?

I do agree with others on I can only be responsible for myself and those closest to me. My son knows that I'm poz and I think that in itself has made him more responsible when it comes to sex. When he comes to see me, one of the first things I ask him is if he is low on condoms and if he has friends with him, I make sure they get some too. Now is that wrong of me to give other people's kids condoms? Remember, I'm trying to be responsible.

I hope I stuck to the topic, if I didn't I truly apologize. Thanks for listening...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline allopathicholistic

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #51 on: January 28, 2007, 12:16:15 pm »
i confess that i would like to touch- or at least see- swede dish's monkey. 

as i have said countless times before:  gay, not blind

true confessions time! yay! yup... the sweetest swede ever 8)

Offline koi1

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #52 on: January 28, 2007, 12:26:08 pm »
Well,

I had been dating someone when I tested positve. I immediately told that person even though it was just a fuck buddy thing, and we both loved foreign films and nice restaurants. He distanced himself. When i went over to his apt. he had thrown my toothbrush away. He tried to restart things when he realized that I had never put him at risk. But it was never the same. This was two months ago, So yeah it has been two months. That kinda hurt. But I prefer to be honest, even if it comes with rejection. I have not seen him in two weeks. I don't think of calling him anymore. He has a right to see me as a bio hazard intimately.

rob
« Last Edit: January 28, 2007, 12:36:36 pm by koi1 »
diagnosed on 11/20/06 viral load 23,000  cd4 97    8%
01/04/07 six weeks after diagnosis vl 53,000 cd4 cd4 70    6%
Began sustiva truvada 01/04/07
newest labs  drawn on 01/15/07  vl 1,100    cd4 119    7%
Drawn 02/10/07
cd4=160 viral load= 131 percentage= 8%
New labs 3/10/07 (two months on sustiva truvada
cd4 count 292  percentage 14 viral load undetectable

Offline koi1

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #53 on: January 28, 2007, 12:50:55 pm »
Queen Alaska,

Your post was refreshing. I don't think it would be a good idea to take it upon yourself to patrol her sexcapades, especially if it is just a rumour. If she indeed is doing what you say she is, the best thing you can do is educate as many people as you feel comfortable discussing this with, that there are people who don't care who they infect, without singling her out.I hope it is just a rumour.  It is great that you have a frank discussion with your son about sex. As far as passing out condoms, you could be passing out worse things. So no I don't think it is wrong to give out condoms. It is your house. It is not like you are standing at gradeschool playground handing them out like stickers. Although in my opinion, the sooner children are able to understand of what is out there, the better.
diagnosed on 11/20/06 viral load 23,000  cd4 97    8%
01/04/07 six weeks after diagnosis vl 53,000 cd4 cd4 70    6%
Began sustiva truvada 01/04/07
newest labs  drawn on 01/15/07  vl 1,100    cd4 119    7%
Drawn 02/10/07
cd4=160 viral load= 131 percentage= 8%
New labs 3/10/07 (two months on sustiva truvada
cd4 count 292  percentage 14 viral load undetectable

Offline Joe K

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #54 on: January 28, 2007, 01:16:41 pm »
When I became poz I vowed that I would never pass my virus to another human being and in doing so I developed a set of rules that serve me to this day.  I don't worry about what others are doing, as I can only control myself and what I will and will not do.

Personally I prefer to play with other pozzies because it is just so much easier and if I hear one more stupid question about HIV transmission from some trick I am going to scream.  Some of you assume that everyone knows the truth about HIV transmission and you are so very wrong.  Some of the younger kids know very little about HIV because nobody has the guts to tell them the truth.  The schools are forbidden from doing it, public education is all but a joke and parents think it will never happen to them.

I do not have the energy to educate the masses on an individual basis and given all the booze and drugs in my area, I am surprised that the entire gay population here is not poz.  But again, not my issue directly and my rules work for me.

Offline dtwpuck

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  • дано мне тело, что мне делать с ним?
Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #55 on: January 28, 2007, 03:34:41 pm »
Kil... I know what you mean.  It's amazing to me how little the kids these days know about HIV and how it's transmitted.  Barebacking is endemic and taken for granted, especially the more casual the atmosphere is about drugs.  This is not to mention the very frequent discussion I have where I disclose to someone and he still says "will you still fuck me bareback?"  sheesh   

I would like to blame this on the right-wing agenda, but I am not so sure.  I spend a lot of time in Toronto and Vancouver and find the same attitudes there.  So.. I think there's more going on here than just a lack of education.  Besides, I find an awful lot of guys who do know how it's transmitted and just simply don't care.  That's the biggest change I've seen since I came out in the eighties. 

Basically, when I'm asked, I don't mince words.  "If you get fucked without a condom, you're going to get HIV".  I find that when it's put in terms that are not couched in psychobabble euphemisms, the point hits home.  You still get the dips who will draw the conclusion of "but if he doesn't shoot . . ." etc etc.    So, I just close down and decide that it's not worth the trouble to argue with someone.  I just won't have sex with them and will stick with other poz guys, for the most part. 
Floating through the void in the caress of two giant pink lobsters named Esmerelda and Keith.

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #56 on: January 28, 2007, 03:54:25 pm »
Quote from: dtwpuck
I would like to blame this on the right-wing agenda, but I am not so sure.

Why don't we blame the drugs and the people fucked up on them?

My recommendation if you REALLY want to get high:  don't have sex while high.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline Joe K

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #57 on: January 28, 2007, 04:53:00 pm »
Hey Puck,

I never said that the lack of education was a right-wing issue, but they sure don't help with their abstinence only programs.  And I agree, having been in London and Amsterdam, where prevention information is absolutely everywhere and in so many forms and yet many of them were still clueless.  I don't know what it will take for people to protect themselves because if the fear of death will not deter someone, then what will?

Substance abuse is another issue, but again there are thousands who will tweak the night away and what can you do about it?  Very little.  So I don't sweat the prevention issues any more.  The info is there if they choose to learn about it and if they don't, I don't really care, but I refuse to be sexually involved with them.

I just cannot understand.  I would give almost anything to be negative and so many guys just see being positive as an inevitable part of being gay and the others are too drugged out to know much of anything.

Offline lydgate

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #58 on: January 28, 2007, 09:16:55 pm »
I want to be puck's boyfriend  :)
Her finely-touched spirit had still its fine issues, though they were not widely visible. Her full nature, like that river of which Cyrus broke the strength, spent itself in channels which had no great name on the earth. But the effect of her being on those around her was incalculably diffusive: for the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.

George Eliot, Middlemarch, final paragraph

Offline Lis

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #59 on: January 28, 2007, 10:04:00 pm »
It all comes down to HIV lite... 1 pill a day .. no worries..  i feel very sorry for the folks that think its that easy..
poz 1986....

Offline mrtallguy

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #60 on: January 28, 2007, 10:06:40 pm »
Puck has a very hot man in his world....the two of them together constitute a fire hazard! WOOF!  :-*

As far as this topic is concerned....the day-to-day stuff that we go through does not make it back to the negative population-at-large.  As pointed out by Lis, they hear about the once/day meds and don't find out about the fatigue, insomnia, diarrhea, depression...and so on....I think most of "us" do not want to be perceived as a "downer" venting this stuff so we are too quiet....but education in moderation will do more than anything else.

Be Well...
Craig
« Last Edit: January 28, 2007, 10:14:57 pm by mrtallguy »
I AM DETERMINED TO SEE THINGS DIFFERENTLY!
--ACIM

Offline Teresa

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #61 on: January 28, 2007, 10:18:21 pm »
I agree with Liz.
I bet that's the way alot of people think...one pill..no biggie. They dont know about the side effects some people get from that one pill.

Teresa
Hubby HIV+ 5/5/06
CD4:320
  %: 26.7
 VL: <20
Atripla (started it 8/24/06)

Offline thunter34

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #62 on: January 28, 2007, 10:45:04 pm »
Puck has a very hot man in his world....the two of them together constitute a fire hazard! WOOF!  :-*

As far as this topic is concerned....the day-to-day stuff that we go through does not make it back to the negative population-at-large.  As pointed out by Lis, they hear about the once/day meds and don't find out about the fatigue, insomnia, diarrhea, depression...and so on....I think most of "us" do not want to be perceived as a "downer" venting this stuff so we are too quiet....but education in moderation will do more than anything else.

Be Well...
Craig


That's gospel that should be etched on stone tablets!  Words like ''mutations'' and ''resistance'' are not as out in the open in the discussions for the mainstream.  Let alone side effect topics, or all of the peripheral medications needed to cover those.  Oh, and how about the frequent blood draws and doctor visits?  What about the financial and employment ramifications?  So many of these issues met my eye in depth as I sat in the waiting room of my ASO on that first day.

Wonder what it would be like if the kids at YouthPride here in Atlanta had a chance to tour the facilities at an ASO?  Wonder what kind of impression it would or wouldn't make if people saw a bigger picture of the real day in the life of the poz?  Just a thought.
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline marc11864

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #63 on: January 28, 2007, 11:15:35 pm »
Personally, I believe it's so much more than just ignorance or drug use. While both of those have definitely had a profound impact I think they are still just the underlying symptoms of a species, that seems to be hell bent on disintegrating at an ever increasing rate.

How much negativity can occur in the world before people begin to subconciously adopt a fatalist mindset.

It's why I'm positive and I know that. The real question you have to wonder about is what can be done to bring things back into balance?
Let us cavort like the Greeks of old! You know the ones I mean.

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #64 on: January 28, 2007, 11:27:30 pm »
I don't think they will be brought back into balance, at least not in the gay community, until there's no longer an epidemic of disease in the community.  People do dire things in fits of despair and denial.  All anyone can do is hope to mitigate the damage.  Many people, before the drug use and HIV exposure, are dealing with other serious issue like self-esteem, being in the closet, general competitiveness in the gay "social" scene, etc.  Add drugs and sex to the mix and it's a recipe for burying their heads in the sand.

If anything the information available today is WORLDS better than it was 15 years ago.  All you have to do is use google.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #65 on: January 29, 2007, 01:02:20 am »
I can't speak for anyone else but I have paid attention to the threads that talked about side effects. Every time a thread on meds is open, I take a look and at one point all everyone seemed to be talking or asking questions about was Atripla. I paid close attention because that is one of the drugs my doctor wants to start me on and he thinks it will be easier in regard to adherence.

I have paid attention to what people seemed to be complaining about, which mostly seemed to be the weird dreams but also knows that if you suffer from depression that one of the medicines clashes with it, I forget which one it is. But I have also heard some say that they didn't have any side effects at all while others started w/ side effects but they eventually subsided, either in a few weeks or some months depending on the person. I realize that everyone does not have good days or feels like shit at times, I do too, but as I have said before, I take it one day at a time, what more can you do?
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline StrongGuy

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #66 on: January 29, 2007, 04:10:53 am »
Queen a lot of people do well on that combo with very manageable sides. Myself included and as many of the experiences on these boards attest with that combo and other first line meds. One day at a time - don't get freaked. Having a good attutude and healthy mental state is half the battle IMHO.

For the record I find the whole 'HIV Lite" phrase extremely condescending. I've yet to meet anyone who views their life with HIV lightly. And I'm not gonna feign a miserable existence and dramatize my well-being so I can scare people into safer sex and/or provide company for misery.

Trying to control action through fear is just way too Republican for me.  I'll let the conservative use it. ;)

Later,
Mikey :)
« Last Edit: January 29, 2007, 04:19:51 am by StrongGuy »
"Get your medical advice from Doctors or medical professionals who you trust and know your history."

"Beware of the fortune teller doom and gloomers who seek to bring you down and are only looking for company, purpose and validation - not your best physical/mental interests."

"You know you all are saying that this is incurable. When the real thing you should be saying is it's not curable at the present time' because as we know, the great strides we've made in medicine." - Elizabeth Edwards

Offline lydgate

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #67 on: January 29, 2007, 04:17:51 am »
Sex is nice.
Her finely-touched spirit had still its fine issues, though they were not widely visible. Her full nature, like that river of which Cyrus broke the strength, spent itself in channels which had no great name on the earth. But the effect of her being on those around her was incalculably diffusive: for the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.

George Eliot, Middlemarch, final paragraph

Offline dtwpuck

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  • дано мне тело, что мне делать с ним?
Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #68 on: January 29, 2007, 06:40:06 am »
I don't think they will be brought back into balance, at least not in the gay community, until there's no longer an epidemic of disease in the community. 

I'm not sure the gay community ever was in balance.  As you said... drugs, social competitiveness, I'd add the cult of the body....  all contributed long before AIDS came along.  The seventies weren't exactly balanced.  My thoughts are really that the only thing that would bring what's being called "balance" here to the gay community is to eliminate its marginalized identity.  Until 'gay' is completely passe, everywhere, we will still have to deal with the endemic low self esteem, addictions, and self destructive personalities that pepper our community.
Floating through the void in the caress of two giant pink lobsters named Esmerelda and Keith.

Offline Queen Tokelove

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  • Smokey the Smurf
Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #69 on: January 29, 2007, 08:34:37 am »
Queen a lot of people do well on that combo with very manageable sides. Myself included and as many of the experiences on these boards attest with that combo and other first line meds. One day at a time - don't get freaked. Having a good attutude and healthy mental state is half the battle IMHO.

For the record I find the whole 'HIV Lite" phrase extremely condescending. I've yet to meet anyone who views their life with HIV lightly. And I'm not gonna feign a miserable existence and dramatize my well-being so I can scare people into safer sex and/or provide company for misery.

Trying to control action through fear is just way too Republican for me.  I'll let the conservative use it. ;)

Later,
Mikey :)

Thanks for the words of encouragement. I actually am looking forward to starting meds. I was bummed a few months ago because I was ready to start meds but couldn't due to the fact that my diabetes is running wild. I try to be realistic when it comes to my virus. My body has fought the good fight for 10 yrs this year and has showed me that this virus isn't a death sentence for me and I'm still here. Reading the posts of those who has been infected for over 20+ years motivates me and encourages me that I still have plenty of years left to live. I even take in the view points of those who's daily life has been hell due to this virus and I accept that this could very well be me in a few years after starting meds or whatever. I can't speak for everyone else but I choose to try to live my life one day at a time.

Now as for the topic at hand, I love sex, who doesn't? But I have gotten to the point that I don't need it all like that. I have sex just fine with my toy, what I want is something with substance, if you have that the sex will fall into place. Unless the person sucks at sex, the dreaded bad fuck. I feel that if the feelings and emotions are there sex will be all the better. Just my opinion...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

Offline indyguy

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #70 on: January 29, 2007, 09:30:34 am »
All this talk about sex is making me horney. And yes I tell them right up front. I dont chase them I replace them.
Meds doing well so far.

Offline koi1

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #71 on: January 29, 2007, 09:36:52 am »
I think we are losing sight of why this thread was started. Which is to underscore the importance of protecting yourself and others when you have HIV. Not meaning that you can't have sex anymore.

When it comes to infecting others some do view HIV as HIV lite. Meaning, they didn't ask, so it is their fault if they get anything from me. All the author of this thread is saying is protect yourself, protect others. HIV infection can be impacted if all of us who know we have it and limit its spread.

I am not saying you are obligated to disclose,  (that is a persononal choice) but the protection issue should be paramount. Assuming that just because they didn't ask they are already poz is dangerous at best. Saying that they deserve it if they don't ask is crazy. Saying "oh well if I don't give it to them someone else will is pathalogical." Having fantasies about giving it to someone is.... you fill in the blank.

Safer sex is something I hope we can all agree on.
diagnosed on 11/20/06 viral load 23,000  cd4 97    8%
01/04/07 six weeks after diagnosis vl 53,000 cd4 cd4 70    6%
Began sustiva truvada 01/04/07
newest labs  drawn on 01/15/07  vl 1,100    cd4 119    7%
Drawn 02/10/07
cd4=160 viral load= 131 percentage= 8%
New labs 3/10/07 (two months on sustiva truvada
cd4 count 292  percentage 14 viral load undetectable

Offline aztecan

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #72 on: January 29, 2007, 09:48:45 am »
The topic of disclosure has caused some lenghty and often heated exchanges here on several occasions.

Joe hit it on the head. I can't do anything about what others are doing. I can only contol what I do and how I do it.

I can only ensure I don't pass the virus to anyone else. That is what I have done and will do, if the opportunity arises.

If the other person, or people, as the case may be, don't like the way I do things, that's their choice.

I have to live with myself.

HUGS,

Mark
"May your life preach more loudly than your lips."
~ William Ellery Channing (Unitarian Minister)

Offline thunter34

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #73 on: January 29, 2007, 09:57:11 am »
path·o·log·i·cal  (pth-lj-kl) also path·o·log·ic (-k)
adj.
1. Of or relating to pathology.
2. Relating to or caused by disease.
3. Of, relating to, or manifesting behavior that is habitual, maladaptive, and compulsive


Technically speaking, disclosing or taking precautions for safer sex is also "pathological".
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline bear60

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #74 on: January 29, 2007, 10:13:06 am »
Of, relating to, or manifesting behavior that is habitual, maladaptive, and compulsive..Quote
.....................................
No offense, but I beg to disagree. 
According to your definition, having safe sex would be an "adaptive" response to the issue of HIV.  NOT having safe sex would be maladaptive.  I think thats what I get out of your definition.
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline thunter34

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #75 on: January 29, 2007, 10:21:07 am »
I'm not sure the gay community ever was in balance.  As you said... drugs, social competitiveness, I'd add the cult of the body....  all contributed long before AIDS came along.  The seventies weren't exactly balanced.  My thoughts are really that the only thing that would bring what's being called "balance" here to the gay community is to eliminate its marginalized identity.  Until 'gay' is completely passe, everywhere, we will still have to deal with the endemic low self esteem, addictions, and self destructive personalities that pepper our community.

Amen to that, brother.  What a great post.  I think that marginalization weighs in on both sides of this...the ones who want to get fucked bareback despite disclosure and for those who have difficulties disclosing and such.  And I doubt the additional name-calling and finger-pointing is going to help matters greatly.

ADDITIONALLY:  Out of defintion 3, perhaps.  Not #2.
« Last Edit: January 29, 2007, 10:24:48 am by thunter34 »
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline AustinWesley

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #76 on: January 29, 2007, 11:10:41 am »
An interesting and passionate subject

Difficult to discuss

The relationship of public health and sex is, to my mind, like Liz Taylor and Richard Burton, can't live with you, can't live without you, much watched by the public eye, who knows the truth about behind closed doors (and quite a lot of drinking or the equiv.).

- matt


Well said Matt!   

Going back to the original subject I believe was how has your sex life been impacted?     Mine hasn't changed drastically.   I was surprised that everyone here wasn't bitching about how HIV causes all this rejection etc.

I've been in a relationship with a negative partner and I don't believe most people are honest about what goes on behind closed doors.    While I would never intentionally infect someone or lie to them, I will say there are those times in the heat of passion aided by too much alcohol we weren't 100% safe. 

I had to laugh at the comment about pie charts and graphs ; )   Too funny!   I can't see me personally dating someone simply because we are both positive, but I have to say on the other hand it's an additional challenge with a partner who is negative.    It stressed me out always having to be the responsible one, but got better over time.

I think many of the Federally funded HIV clinicians, and even a lot of physicians are pushing the idea of safe sex to extremes now.   What I mean is some of the crap they tell people HIV can be transmitted via oral sex.   I guess they are all airing on the side of caution, but I have to say I was surprised at how blunt my HIV doctor was when my partner and I went in together.   

Anyways, I believe a completely satisfying safer sex life is possible and as far as relationships go in my future I still intend to date a person and not a virus. 
Diag. 3/06  Infected aprx. 2 mo. Prior
Date        CD4   %      VL
4/6/06     627    32    36,500     NO MEDS YET!
6/7/06     409    27    36,100
8/23/06   408    25     22,300
1/2/07     354    23     28,700
2/9/07     139    30     23,000  Hep A Vaccine same day???
2/21/07   274    26     18,500 
3/3/07    RX of Truvada/Sustiva Started.
4/5/07    321     27      Undectable 1st mo.  
5/16/07  383     28    Undectable 2nd mo.
8/10/07  422     32   UD <48 on new scale!

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #77 on: January 29, 2007, 11:54:53 am »
I'm not sure the gay community ever was in balance.  As you said... drugs, social competitiveness, I'd add the cult of the body....  all contributed long before AIDS came along.  The seventies weren't exactly balanced.  My thoughts are really that the only thing that would bring what's being called "balance" here to the gay community is to eliminate its marginalized identity.  Until 'gay' is completely passe, everywhere, we will still have to deal with the endemic low self esteem, addictions, and self destructive personalities that pepper our community.
I agree with those comments, and I should have said "more" into balance.  Still comparing an end times mentality during a disease epidemic to one when it did not exist is disingenuous in many respects.  And a degree of marginalized identity might potentially always be realistically expected in any minority group.  I hate saying that but one only need look at the experience of African Americans, and this is not isolated to the United States. 

Remove HIV and there would be less fatalistic acting out.  But yes, this does NOT mean by any means such activity would disappear.  I never meant to imply that and apologize if what I said was construed as such.  There will ALWAYS be foolish behavior.  The presence of death though kind of makes things extra crazy.
"I’ve slept with enough men to know that I’m not gay"

Offline mrtallguy

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Re: " I do care, don't fuck me"
« Reply #78 on: January 29, 2007, 10:11:26 pm »
  The presence of death though kind of makes things extra crazy.

That is an interesting observation....perhaps my reaction is even more interesting.  It involves how we as a people perceive death.   If we are not comfortable with it then we see this behavior as crazy because it could lead to death.   If we are comfortable with our eventual transition then this level of comfort could give rise to such "risky" behavior.  It is very possible that as we become less attached to life (as we know it) and more comfortable with death (or the hereafter)....so called "risky" behaviors will, in fact, increase.  As a species are we evolving ourselves out of existence??
I AM DETERMINED TO SEE THINGS DIFFERENTLY!
--ACIM

 


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