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Author Topic: What really is the risk for oral sex?  (Read 13391 times)

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Offline basilthecowboy

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  • Posts: 30
Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #50 on: December 15, 2008, 08:40:28 AM »
Ann

Sorry for that. I should have kept it in one thread. The facts were slightly different this time in that I had anal with a condom. I thought this might be a higher risk. The fact that I had buring pee meant that I got something so if I did get something, then HIV might have passed through the condom.

I should not have engaged again after my previous questions. I was feeling depressed. I can't get it out of my mind. I feel helpless and stupid after knowing that I should not be putting myself at any risk.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #51 on: December 15, 2008, 08:46:26 AM »
You might consider getting yourself to a therapist or other professional to discuss your situation and how come you continue to put yourself in situations where you feel like crap and worry obsessively afterwards. Life at its longest is too short to waste in such misery.
Andy Velez

Offline basilthecowboy

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Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #52 on: December 15, 2008, 08:59:15 AM »
Andy

Without question I am going to set up an appointment with a therapist. I might be suffering from guilt which is feeding an OCD. I will take your advice on this.

It just seems that I cannot live with even a small risk. That is the nature of OCD. Well, I will be tested on the 29th and also set up an appointment with a therapist. I feel so miserable that everything in my life will be lost over taking a stupid risk.

I will not put myself at any more risk again as the anxiety is worse that the pleasure.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #53 on: December 15, 2008, 10:23:40 AM »
That sounds like a good plan for taking care of yourself. Good luck with it.
Andy Velez

Offline basilthecowboy

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Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #54 on: December 15, 2008, 12:43:36 PM »
Andy

Thanks for your patience and understanding.

A little bit of reassurance goes a long way with us when we don't tolerate risk well.

I feel a little bit better from the responses from you and Rapidrod and Ann.

I am taking a conscious decision to focus on the good things in my life and I really hope that my test will be negative as everyone has said.

It is still so nerve wracking to to think "What-if" etc.

Thanks again.

Offline basilthecowboy

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Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #55 on: December 16, 2008, 08:28:03 PM »
So I have started taking Zoloft now to control my anxiety. I looked at the aegis website and it says that condom covered intercourse is very low risk and anal sex with a condom is low risk. This is based on doctors and medical professionals and is very different from what you all have been telling me that there is no risk.

My symptoms prove something else is going on.

Also, a previous long term survivor posted that condoms are not 100% effective. Right so why do I feel like I am being misled. I am never going to have sex again outside my marriage. I have too much of a risk even with a condom. I am so upset.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #56 on: December 16, 2008, 09:16:17 PM »
Seek professional counseling. You were never at risk from having protected sex. Condoms used consistently and correctly are very effective in preventing HIV and other STDs.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #57 on: December 17, 2008, 06:03:49 AM »
Basil,

Some sites will say that protected intercourse is low risk simply because of the possibility that the condom might break. Yours didn't. They won't either, if you use them correctly. Read the condom and lube links in my signature line if you haven't already.

Protected intercourse where the condom has not broken IS NO RISK for hiv infection.

My symptoms prove something else is going on.

Sure, something might  be going on, but that something is not going to be hiv. The ONLY way to find out what, if anything, IS going on is by seeing a doctor. Posting on an internet forum is not going to give you a diagnosis.

Keep posting about this NO RISK situation and you will be given a time out. There's nothing more we can do for you here.

Ann

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline basilthecowboy

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  • Posts: 30
Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #58 on: December 22, 2008, 04:33:55 PM »
ok so I am starting to feel a little bit more controlled and relaxed about the last incident. The Zoloft is really helping me keep a handle on this. All I want to know is if anyone contracted HIV with an intact latex condom through anal/vaginal sex? Can I fully expect a negative on this test next week? I am trying to breathe and take my mind off this.

Thanks again and I am sorry for a being a pain but just want some reassurance until next week.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #59 on: December 22, 2008, 04:46:33 PM »
Re-read what Ann said to you a couple of entries ago.

I STILL expect you to test negative.

You've got a few more days to wait for the inevitable negative result. Get busy with other things while you're waiting for your result and lay off of surfing the web for more stuff to scare yourself with. No kidding.
Andy Velez

Offline basilthecowboy

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  • Posts: 30
Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #60 on: December 28, 2008, 03:36:54 PM »
Thanks Andy.

I am going for my test tomorrow. I think the Hasslefree Clinic in Toronto uses the rapid test but I aqm not sure. There are still niggling thought sin my mind about symptoms and the rash on my face and slight fever. The zoloft has been pretty helpful in containing negative thoughts. I am praying that all iss okay and my test is negative. Still very frightened though.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #61 on: December 28, 2008, 04:58:48 PM »
Fortunately feelings aren't facts. Good luck with your test which I expect will yield a negative result.
Andy Velez

Offline basilthecowboy

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  • Posts: 30
Re: Low risk vs no risk
« Reply #62 on: January 02, 2009, 02:13:39 PM »
I wanted to let you know that I went for a rapid test at the Hasslefree Clinic and it was negative. I am so happy. I am still not sure what the symptoms were a result of but am testing for other stds. The test was done at 10 weeks. I hope that is sufficient time. If I am found to have an std, it will freak me out because then I think that the condom failed.

I wanted to thank everyone that responded especially Andy, Ann and Rapidrod for helping me through this time.

I have two resolutions: The first to do my part in whatever form to fight this dreadful disease and the second to be faithful to my wife.

The lesson learnt from this is that to avoid the agony of what-ifs, think before you do an act, what you are comfortable with and don't get caught up in the moment.

Offline basilthecowboy

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What really is the risk for oral sex?
« Reply #63 on: March 04, 2009, 03:25:34 PM »
HI

I have been coing to this site often and there is a lot of debate about the risks of oral sex. I also understand that giving oral sex is riskier than receiving. I am a male and received a blowjob and worried that the saliva could have given me HIV. What is my real risk?

Thanks for your input.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: What really is the risk for oral sex?
« Reply #64 on: March 04, 2009, 04:23:34 PM »
Basil,

This is the FIFTH time we've had to merge your threads. It's time consuming and I'm beginning to think you really don't listen to a single thing said to you here.

If you did, you'd already know that there is ABSOLUTELY NO HIV RISK to you when you get you get your dick sucked.

You've had it here mate. You've been coming here for over two years now and if we haven't gotten through to you yet, we're never going to. I'm banning you. We've got better things to do than to talk to brick walls.

Go get yourself into therapy. We can do no more for you.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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