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Author Topic: Serodiscordant Couple  (Read 523 times)

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Offline pnw

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Serodiscordant Couple
« on: October 26, 2015, 12:22:01 AM »

New member here, hoping I am posting this in the correct forum.  Gay couple here, my partner has been + for 19 years, we have been together 21.  I am negative.  I am joining here since we feel very alone.  Not many are aware of our situation.  We are wondering about how to meet others that might be in our situation or +/+ couples.  In searching online it doesn't appear there is much out there for support.  Any here have any suggestions?

Offline tednlou2

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  • Posts: 5,604
Re: Serodiscordant Couple
« Reply #1 on: October 26, 2015, 01:17:59 AM »
Hello, pnw.  I'm in your situation, but reversed.  My partner and I just celebrated 20 years together.  I place my infection back 14 years, but diagnosed for 7.  He is neg.  Luckily, he has been great from day one.  I've read several stories of partners leaving. 

Besides a site like this, I'm not sure where one would discuss magnetic relationships.  There are a number of members here, where one is positive and one is negative.  I'm sure you would get conversation that way.  I am happy to talk about it.  As for the right forum, your post will likely be moved to "Someone I Care About Has HIV," since you are not positive.  Well, unless your partner joins and starts a thread.  But, you'll get responses in that forum, too. 

Keep in touch,


Online Jeff G

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  • How am I doing Beren ?
Re: Serodiscordant Couple
« Reply #2 on: October 26, 2015, 07:58:59 AM »
Welcome to the forums . Ted is correct, I moved your thread into the someone I care about forum where you should post all of your topics. As a HIV negative member you are only allowed to post or reply in the some one I care about forum and the off topic forums where we discuss any thing other than HIV .

Offline AusShep

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  • Posts: 434
Re: Serodiscordant Couple
« Reply #3 on: October 26, 2015, 04:49:05 PM »
Where are you located?  Seems like finding other poz couples would be easy anywhere I've lived; serodiscordant couples are always in the mix.  Do you go out to bars or gay events at all?  You probably need to be pretty open about your status in order to more easily find others.

I'm not sure what sort of support you're looking for after so many years.  I've been poz since 94 and been with my neg husband since 92.  We don't use condoms anymore which sometimes freaks me out if I think about the old days, but that freak out isn't really rational since I've been UD for so long given the various study results. 

Offline chrisnc1980

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  • Posts: 7
Re: Serodiscordant Couple
« Reply #4 on: November 24, 2015, 07:50:55 PM »
Hey pnw,

Like tednlou2, I'm in your position, but reversed.  I am newly diagnosed, but my bf has tested negative twice since my status changed.  I too have searched the internet to find a support group or a way to meet folks in our situation.

I have never been a club/bar person - I go occasionally, but it's rather infrequent for me, which complicates things even further. 

I don't know the answer to your question, but I'll keep looking.

Good luck.


Offline ChrisnTX

  • Member
  • Posts: 13
Re: Serodiscordant Couple
« Reply #5 on: Yesterday at 03:48:03 PM »
Howdy pnw, 

Like several others I'm in your situation but reversed.  My partner and I have been together 13 years and I was infected this year.  My prior two relationships were the opposite where I was the negative partner in a serodiscordant relationship. One where I knew going into the relationship and the other where my partner got it while we were together.   So I've experienced this from several different angles.   

I know the local HIV/AIDS service organization near me does a weekly support group for couples.  You might call the organization closest to you and see if they have anything or check out their website. 
07/07/15 Diagnosed
08/04/15 CD4 1013 CD4% 43 VL 360
08/26/15 Started Stribild
09/09/15 CD4   940 CD4% 46 VL UND


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