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Author Topic: Stiff...?!  (Read 6845 times)

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Offline Vern

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Stiff...?!
« on: December 11, 2006, 01:26:30 AM »
Great, thought I was all in the clear and now this happens!

Was messed up on alcohol and recreational drugs (cocaine) recently.  Went to a whorehouse in India and received 3 unprotected blowjobs over the course of several hours and the duration of each was rather long due to the effects of the cocaine.  Next morning, my penis was very chafed and red and painful to the touch on the head and near the urethral opening (must be from the teeth or friction).  Not sure about blood, because I was too messed up to even have noticed I think.

I know that there has never been a documented case of getting HIV from a BJ.  But in this case, I had not slept for a few nights prior to this, and the drugs/alcohol would have already contributed to lower immunity levels.  Plus, the chafing/abrasion of the skin on my penis, plus the fact that this is India where the HIV rates are growing the fastest and has a huge number of HIV+ people, etc. etc.

Do I need to worry about HIV transmission to me?  Would you worry about this if it were you?
Do I need to take a HIV test or not?

I do know that I need some counselling as I want to stop drinking alcohol and doing drugs (it seems that drinking alcohol leads to doing a lot of other things that I would not do if I were sober, so not sure if the problem is the alcohol or me).

Thanks,

Vern

Offline cubbybear

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #1 on: December 11, 2006, 05:02:28 AM »
Hi Vern.

As you have already pointed out, there are no known documented cases of HIV being transmitted to an insertive partner via oral sex, and you will not be the first.  Saliva is non infectious and is efficient at inhibiting the HIV virus due to enzymes and other chemicals present in it.

You do not need to worry about HIV transmission for receiving a blow job.  Drugs/Alcohol are never a good mix when it comes to maintaining safer sex.
There's a bear in there!
Positive since 2000
Diagnosed 17/9/2005 CD4 35 VL 293,000
Meds 23/9/2005 Sustiva/Truvada
Currently CD4 232 VL Undetectable

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #2 on: December 11, 2006, 08:00:38 AM »
All of your add-ons about chafing and such don't change the bottom line. Believe me, many before you have come up with all sorts of details which they were sure made their oral experience different from and riskier than others.

That still hasn't resulted in any confirmed transmissions from getting a blow job. Sometimes people seem more alarmed about this if they were with professionals rather than civiliians.

That factor still doesn't change anything. No one has ever had a confirmed case of HIV transmission via getting a blow job. It's safe to say that despite your repeated activity that evening you aren't going to make history by becoming the first.

The only serious red flag in what you have mentioned is that you were messed up on drugs during this incident. Excessive drugging and drinking mixed with casual sex makes for a dangerous combination and often leads to unsafe sex. It's something that you would be wise to avoid in the future.

As far as HIV is concerned you don't have to worry this time and testing is not indicated.

In general we do recommend that anyone who's sexually active should get a full STD panel done regularly -- at least annually and more frequently if there are symptoms. Other STDs are much easier to catch than HIV.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline Vern

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #3 on: December 28, 2006, 01:41:31 AM »
Thanks Guys,

I was feeling much better, but have the following:

1.  Ever since the episode, the area where my groin lymph nodes are hurt a lot (not to the touch, but shooting pains which last for a while).  This is especially more severe at night and causes me to wake up.

2.  3 weeks after the episode, I woke up with ulcers on my penis (with white pus) and very painful.  It can't be herpes, because I already have herpes. 

Besides this, I have had a very sore throat, feeling of malaise, etc.  These surely sound like symptoms of HIV to me.  I don't see genital ulcers being caused by anxiety (and I was actually happy after reading your replies earlier) and its the ulcers that are really worrying me.

Looks like my luck has run out.  Please pray for me.

Thanks,

Vern

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #4 on: December 28, 2006, 03:17:15 AM »
Vein, drop the drama, we've heard your story before. You don't believe it's herpes, because you have them already. Well geesh, like they don't come back after you've had an out break? Wrong! Once you have herpes, you have herpes for life.

Offline Vern

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #5 on: December 28, 2006, 04:46:29 AM »
Thanks for your message rapidrod.

I didn't mean to be dramatic - just not feeling too well or happy right now and maybe that's why it came out that way.

I do understand that herpes is for life and that recurrences happen.  Its just that I was infected with herpes 2 years ago and never got a recurrent episode in all this time.  Plus, the current lesions do not look like typical herpes lesions, and the timing of it all just seems to be too coinciendental.

Thanks,

Vern

Offline Ann

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #6 on: December 28, 2006, 07:20:23 AM »
Vern,

Hiv does NOT cause ulcers, with or without pus, on the genitals. I take it you say it's not herpes because it isn't like the herpes you've had in the past. You need to see a doctor to find out what is really going on - it could easily be syphilis. While you will NOT become infected with hiv through getting a blowjob, you CAN become infected with other things, like gonorrhea and syphilis, through blowjobs.

Get to a doctor and get yourself sorted out. Ulcers on your genitals can be very serious indeed - but it has nothing to do with hiv. If you have syphilis you need treatment.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Vern

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #7 on: December 28, 2006, 11:17:10 AM »
Hi Ann,

Actually genital ulcers is a symptom of primary HIV.  See http://www.thebody.com/cfa/primary.html.

Also, syphilis is characterized by a single painless ulcer, whereas I have multiple painful ulcers.  And at the time of writing this, I now have a rash of small red bumps on the side of my torso.  Things just seem to be getting worse!!!

No choice now but to go for the HIV RNA test.


Thanks,

Vern

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #8 on: December 28, 2006, 11:22:34 AM »
There are every imaginable symptoms to hiv, but hiv has NO SPECIFIC symptoms. You are worried about a blowjob which you already know you don't get hiv by getting your dick sucked. You can test all you want for HIV it's still not going to change. You do need to see a doctor, but not about HIV.

Offline Ann

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #9 on: December 28, 2006, 11:23:14 AM »
Vern,

You can waste all the money on unnecessary PCR testing you want - you will NOT be the first person in the 25+ year history of the hiv pandemic to become infected through getting your penis sucked. Not one person has ever been infected this way and sorry, but you won't be the first.

Instead of wasting money on hiv testing, have the doc look at the ulcers on your penis. It's nothing to do with hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline thunter34

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  • His name is Carl.
Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #10 on: December 28, 2006, 11:26:27 AM »
Nope- I side with Ann on this one!  That single ulcer business is indicative of primary syphilis infection.  Syphilis in secondary and tertiary (3rd) stage infection can present with multiple ulcers and rashes over the body.

Get thee to a doctor-  lickity split, friend!  You need a professional eye to find out exactly what is going on.  It doesn't sound like it is HIV, really...and you should be happy for that.  Still, that doesn't mean all the other STD's are totally minor league.  Left unattended, they can become quite serious.  

Tim
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #11 on: December 28, 2006, 11:29:24 AM »
Vern, neither the presence nor the absence of any particular symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. Only an HIV test taken at the appropriate time, (the CDC recommends at 13 weeks past a risky incident), will give you a reliable answer.

Genital ulcers are not an HIV specific occurrence.

Nothing you have reported leads to me other than that you will test negative.

What is actually a red flag in what you have written is about excessive drinking and drugging, which I have known again and again to lead to unsafe sex and ultimately HIV infection among other things. Some of what the emotional after effect of such experiences can be comes through in your comments. If this a recurring problem for you then I suggest you think about getting some professional help to address this.

You're betting against yourself when you drink and drug excessively.

Also, other STDs are much easier to acquire than HIV, so you would be wise to regularly have a full STD panel done -- at least annually and every six months is even better. As for your symptoms, discuss them with your doctor instead of (mis)diagnosing yourself.

Cheers,  

Andy Velez

Offline koi1

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #12 on: December 28, 2006, 11:38:33 AM »
HI Vern,

Could it be that you have engaged in unprotected vaginal intercourse before this? When was your last HIV test?  Were these injectable drugs you used? Maybe your anxiety is from other exposures. And Ann is right there are other serious things you could get from a blow job. I think the sores on your penis are of most concern right now. Some PCR tests are not reliable until after 28 days, so you have that and cost to consider (250-400 U.S. dollars. )

Best of luck,

rob
diagnosed on 11/20/06 viral load 23,000  cd4 97    8%
01/04/07 six weeks after diagnosis vl 53,000 cd4 cd4 70    6%
Began sustiva truvada 01/04/07
newest labs  drawn on 01/15/07  vl 1,100    cd4 119    7%
Drawn 02/10/07
cd4=160 viral load= 131 percentage= 8%
New labs 3/10/07 (two months on sustiva truvada
cd4 count 292  percentage 14 viral load undetectable

Offline Vern

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #13 on: January 02, 2007, 01:20:00 AM »
Hi Everyone,

Just wanted to give an update and thank everyone for their posts.

I took what is called a "HIV Early Detection Profile" test 21 days after the exposure.  It included a Elisa for HIV 1 and 2, Qualitative PCR RNA, P24 Antigen, and Proviral DNA.  All results were negative (still waiting for the proviral DNA results though).  I know that 13 weeks is definitive, but at least this is reassuring.

Vern

Offline Ann

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #14 on: January 02, 2007, 09:09:07 AM »
Vern,

I hope that when you wasted what I suspect would be a hefty sum on all those unnecessary tests, you also had the doctor look at the ulcer on your penis. That ulcer is your real concern here, not hiv.

Getting a blowjob is NOT a risk for hiv infection, no matter what sort of spin you want to put on it. You do not need further hiv testing over this blowjob incident. You are conclusively hiv negative.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Vern

  • Member
  • Posts: 14
Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #15 on: January 04, 2007, 12:46:16 AM »
Hi Ann,

Thanks for the reply.  I did check with the doctor - it was just a case of fungal infection (candida balanitis to be specific) which was resolved with some medication.

I am now better educated with regard to HIV and to the perils of drinking/drugging.  Hopefully I will also be able to educate others (and learn from this myself).  Thanks again for your support and for the support of all those who responded in this thread.  All of you are doing a wonderful thing by helping people like myself and we all owe you our sincere gratitude.

Thanks,

Vern

Offline Vern

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  • Posts: 14
Oops I did it again !
« Reply #16 on: March 03, 2007, 05:39:14 AM »
I'm actually ashamed at having to write about this.  I have tried very hard to not repeat my mistakes and put myself in a position whereby I risk my health and life, but I have not suceeded.  But I am so worried and scared that I needed advice from my colleagues on this site.

During a bender, I had 5 unprotected blow jobs from 5 different prostitutes over the course of one night.  As you can imagine, I was pretty sore and chafed as a result.

6 days later I suddenly got so tired and sleepy and started feeling a bit confused.  I have never felt such fatigue before in my life.  I also had pain behind my eyes accompanying this.  This lasted for 3 days and the fatigue seems to have cleared up.  It is now day 11 and I still have pain behind my eyes (especially the right one).

I know that everyone here says that you can't get HIV from getting a blowjob.  But I know that when I get a viral infection, I feel the same kind of fatigue as I felt recently (except that recently, it was much more severe).  Plus I have never heard of having pain behind the eyes for so many days unless it was related to HIV.  I have also read that fatigue and head ache/eye pain are the first signs of HIV infection.

Perhaps I overdid it and somehow got infected.

What should I do?

Thanks,

Vern

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #17 on: March 03, 2007, 05:43:01 AM »
Why did you come to the Internet instead of seeing a doctor? You are right, we're going to say it again that you didn't have a risk. See a doctor for your symptoms, they are unrelated to HIV.

Offline Ann

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Re: Toothy BJ in India
« Reply #18 on: March 03, 2007, 07:16:30 AM »
Quote
I'm actually ashamed at having to write about this.  I have tried very hard to not repeat my mistakes and put myself in a position whereby I risk my health and life, but I have not suceeded.

Vern,

I don't care how many blowjobs you got in one night, blowjobs are NOT a means of hiv transmission. Not one person has ever become infected this way and you certainly won't be the first. I'm quite sure you're not the only person in the world to have gotten five blowjobs in one night either.

There are other viral illnesses in the world other than hiv. I have NEVER heard of pain behind the eyes having anything to do with hiv. Symptoms or even the lack of symptoms mean absolutely NOTHING when it comes to hiv infection.

I quoted your words above because your shame over your actions probably has more to do with how you're feeling than anything. If getting a blowjob bothers you that much, then I would suggest you seek counseling to help you deal with your emotional reaction to sex. We cannot help you with that here.

Ann

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Vern

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When is too soon?
« Reply #19 on: June 04, 2007, 12:44:51 AM »
My local laboratory (in India) is offering the following tests labelled as "HIV Early Detection Profile."
 
HIV-DUO
p24antigen
HIV-RNA qualitative
HIV Proviral DNA
 
 
How soon after exposure would these tests give me a true indication of infection status?  i.e. how soon can one take these tests and then count the results as accurate?

By the way, can someone get gonorrhea from deep kissing (if the other person has gonorrhea infection in the throat)?

Thanks!

Offline Ann

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Re: When is too soon?
« Reply #20 on: June 04, 2007, 06:26:35 AM »
Vern,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread. This is the second time we've asked you to do this.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

The hiv window period for a conclusive result is three months after a true risk - such as unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. You got a blowjob, which is NOT a risk for hiv infection and you do not need to test over a blowjob.

It would be possible, but not probable, to get gonorrhea from kissing.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Vern

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Stiff...?!
« Reply #21 on: December 12, 2007, 05:59:19 AM »
Hi Guys,

Many sites list stiff neck (aseptic meningitis) as a common symptom of primary HIV.  When they say stiff neck, do they mean the inability to move the neck or just difficulty/pain when trying to move the neck?  I would think that a symptom like stiff neck has nothing to do with normal flu-like symptoms and it sounds pretty specific to me (instead of the usual non-specific symptoms like fever, sore throat, etc.).  I guess having a stiff neck that suddenly appears would be a worrying thing because there can't be many causes for it....

Also, is it common to have symptoms (like stiff neck) 2-3 days after a risky exposure?  I know that typically it is 2-4 weeks, but what if your body was already reeling under stress, or hard weekend of partying, or lack of sleep for a few days, etc. and the immunity was already low?  Would that change the timing of the symptoms?  Plus, I have seen on certain website case studies where people who have been infected noticed there symptoms days after exposure, not weeks.  So which one is it?

Thanks,

Vern

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #22 on: December 12, 2007, 06:13:09 AM »
HIV has no specific symptoms. If everyone thought a stiff neck was HIV everyone would be infected. Take the time and read the lessons section. You can find the link at the top of the forum or in the "Welcome" thread.

Read the posting guidelines while you are at it.
« Last Edit: December 12, 2007, 06:14:48 AM by RapidRod »

Offline Ann

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #23 on: December 12, 2007, 06:30:41 AM »
Vern,

How many times do you have to be told to not start new threads every time you come here? Read the posting guidelines and ABIDE by them or you won't be permitted to post here anymore.

What do you consider to be a "risky exposure"? I have a feeling you're worrying over nothing, yet again.

And by the way, I rejected that new account you applied for. Try that again and you'll be banned as having more than one account is against our Terms of Membership, which you agreed to when you joined this site the first time.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Vern

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #24 on: December 12, 2007, 06:46:02 AM »
Ann,

Actually this question has nothing to do with my previous questions - that's why I started a new thread!  I was just seeking clarification to information that I have come across on other sites.

Do we have to use the same thread regardless of question or situation?  I dont understand the logic, becasue this will ultimately confuse readers when there are many different topics being discussed unders the same thread.  I would imagine a thread should be based on content, not user.  But if thats the requirement, then I will do so! ;D

I applied for the other account cause I forgot my password and then realized that I could get my password sent by email (check the password request and you will see that this is the case).  Sorry for the confusion.

Vern

Offline Ann

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #25 on: December 12, 2007, 06:55:59 AM »
Vern,

My experience of working in this forum for the past six years has proven to me that keeping each members thoughts and questions all in one thread is far less confusing that allowing multiple threads. Don't teach your grandmother to suck eggs, young man.

Please abide by our posting guidelines and Terms of Membership from here on out. Thank you for your cooperation.

And you still haven't bothered to tell us what, exactly, you are worried about. You've been coming here long enough to know that we do NOT discuss symptoms, because they are meaningless. We talk risk assessment and testing ONLY.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Vern

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #26 on: June 30, 2008, 12:32:11 AM »
Hi Everyone,

Am back again, though I wish it were under better circumstances.....

I know from this forum that receiving a blowjob is not a risk for HIV transmission.  Would like to get your advice on the following though:

A prostitute rubbed cocaine on my penis several times while giving me a blowjob (I was not aware of this until I felt a little numb and asked her).  I know that receiving a blowjob generally is zero risk, but would the cocaine on the penis have changed the risk factor?  For example, the cocaine could have caused small cuts/abrasions on my penis as well as her mouth/gums/tongue (thereby allowing blood/other fluids and points of entry to be present).  Also, the cocaine led to a lengthier and rougher blowjob than normal (due to the numbness) and I was red and sore for a whole day.  I am not circumcised, if this makes any difference.

Normally I would still not worry about this due to the information I have received on this forum and in other places.  But, I also had the following symptoms:

Day 0
Unprotected blowjob (as described above)

Day 10
•   Started getting painful arthralgia on the top part of my right foot.

Day 11
•   Painful arthralgia spread to both hands and kept getting an intermittent shooting pain in the area above the right ankle.
•   One episode of diarrhea

Day 12
•   Woke up early in the morning (3 AM) feeling very hot and was sweating (not drenched though) even though the AC was on at a cool temperature.  Took my temperature, but there was no fever.  Is this what they refer to as a night sweat?
•   Felt weak and confused
•   Had two more episodes of diarrhea (3 AM and 7 AM).  No further diarrhea after these episodes.
•   Feeling nauseous and lost appetite throughout the day (forced myself to eat three small meals even though feeling nauseous).

Day 13
•   The lack of appetite and nausea seemed to have gone away by about 4 PM.
•   Arthralgias still remained

Day 14
•   Arthralgias in the hand seemed to have gone away.  The intermittent shooting pain in the area above the right ankle also diminished but was faintly present.


I know most of these symptoms, when viewed individually are non-specific and could be attributed to a variety of illnesses.  But when they occur together (like in my case), there are not a whole lot of illnesses out there that could cause them.  For example, as in my case, what other illnesses besides HIV can cause arthralgias and gastrointestinal distress at the same time?  The coincidence just seems to strong…..

Any thoughts?

Offline Ann

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #27 on: June 30, 2008, 05:07:27 AM »
Vern,

You got what I presume was a very expensive blowjob. (Cocaine on your cock???) It was NOT expensive where your health is concerned. Getting blown is NOT a risk for hiv infection. Not one person has ever been infected that way and you aren't going to be the first.

You did NOT have a risk for hiv infection. Go see your doctor about the physical stuff that's bothering you. It's nothing to do with hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Vern

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #28 on: November 19, 2008, 10:17:02 PM »
Hi Everyone,

As you are aware, I have posted here several times in the past, usually always worried about a blowjob.  And always, I have been told that getting blowjobs carry no risk for HIV infection.

I think this may not be the right advice to give.  First of all, there is always a theoretical risk.  Secondly, maybe there are some other small factors that are involved which contribute towards risk.

For example, recently, I got the usual multiple unprotected blowjobs in one night.  (I think subconsciously I may be feeling that this is an entirely risk free activity so why not indulge).  Thereafter:

Day 6 – started getting muscle/joint aches and intermittent nausea.  This has continued till today (2.5 weeks).

Day 14 – started feeling like crap and had a night sweat that night.
Day 15 – started getting retro orbital pain and headache and achy feelings became worse.  Also got numbness (peripheral neuropathy) in toes.  All this has continued for 3 days now.   Nausea also getting worse.

Basically there are no other diseases that have this constellation of symptoms.  It can only be HIV.

Which leads me to 2 conclusions:

Either the theoretical risk is possible and probable

Something else happened that allowed for HIV transmission – e.g. she may have touched her vagina and then touched me thereby allowing vaginal secretions on my penis, etc. 

Any thoughts?  Need some good luck wishes for sure for my test tom.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #29 on: November 19, 2008, 10:59:03 PM »
How can we give best wishes when you do not accept the transmissions lessons and advice we have handed out over time? Advice that is based on almost thirty years' of first tiered, peer reviewed science and epidemiology.

I am sorry you feel bad.

You do not get HIV from getting a blowjob.

But yet you still worry. And yet you still keep getting them. And then you come here and blame us for giving out incorrect information (which you claim to believe, thus leading you to further, future blowjobs) and recriminate us for encouraging your own behavior.

Why not take some personal responsibility? Either you believe the science of this site or you don't. If you don't, then don't get blowjobs. And if you do, certainly don't come back here and project your own guilt and paranoia on us.

In my opinion, this site has helped you all that it possibly can. Your accusations are undeserved and unwarranted. And also unfounded in science.

These are my thoughts. You did solicit them, after all.

As for the symptoms, they fit a hundred of illnesses. They also fit simple stress. HIV only? Really? Is your Google stuck on HIV searches? Look at cancer. Look at stress. Look at a thousand other things. Look OUTSIDE your preconceived notions for a moment.

More to the point, I don't know where you get your "constellation of HIV symptoms" comes from. Certainly not this site, nor the lessons contained therein. As you have explicitly stated that you doubt the transmission theory here, I can understand if you sought your information elsewhere.

Our answers, barring dramatic changes in infections and in science from the petri dish on up to the multiple serodiscordant studies, is not likely to change.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Vern

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #30 on: November 20, 2008, 12:04:20 AM »
Hi JKnatl2,

Thanks for your very candid reply!

I did not mean to hurl any accusations at anybody or blame anybody.  I am the only person to blame for my actions.

All I was trying to say was that institutions like the CDC say there is a theoretic risk for getting a blowjob though there are no documented cases. 

Since I think my symptoms are really specific to HIV (as per the symptoms generally associate with primary HIV infection as per aidsmeds.com, thebody.com, etc.), I thought there could only be 2 logical explanations: (1) I was the unlucky one for the theoretical risk, or more probably, (2) there was something else that happened that I am not fully aware of that may have been risky (e.g. getting vaginal fluids on my penis if she touched herself first, etc. or some other thing like that).

Please dont take offence.  I'm just trying to look at it logically.

Anyway, I test today and get my results on Friday.  I will inform of my results and if it is not good, then we can assume I was infected by some other activity during that incident as outlined above.

Thanks!

Offline Ann

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #31 on: November 20, 2008, 06:50:35 AM »
Vern,

Basically there are no other diseases that have this constellation of symptoms.  It can only be HIV.

Sorry, mate, but I laughed out loud when I read that. You're kidding, right? Maybe you should try a career in stand-up.

Your symptoms could be caused by any number of common viruses or other ailments. However, as long as you've not been having unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, that virus is NOT hiv.

I'm just trying to look at it logically.

If you were looking at it logically, you'd logically conclude that you could not possibly be infected through getting your dick sucked. Logic would also take you to the doctor's to find out what, if anything, is actually going on with you.

You didn't have a risk. Keep coming back with more blowjob woes and you'll be timed out.

Ann


Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Vern

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When the experts on this community comment....
« Reply #32 on: June 10, 2010, 05:58:42 AM »
...do they always assume the risk was with a HIV+ partner?

For example, when people have concerns about contracting HIV from getting a bj, do the community members assume the partner was HIV+ and still say its absolutely no risk?

I'm just a little confused on the whole oral sex risk issue.  The logic seems to be that since its never happened before, it can't happen ever.  But there are medical professionals (e.g. Dr. Roberty Frascino at thebody.com that have suspected infection this way during their professional careers - see the posts under oral sex).  However, he qualifies it by saying that there were extenuating circumstances - e.g. blood in mouth, trauma, etc.

So, it goes to say that if you are exposed to saliva, there is probably no risk.  But I doubt anyone here is a medical professional to say you need x amount of blood in a person's mouth to make transmission likely.  Anyway, what I'm getting at is that perhaps the message should be more like we have never had a documented case and the chances of getting HIV through this route is minimal at best.  But its not impossible.  And people get influenced by the information they read on boards such as this, so we need to be responsible in our answers.

As for me, my risk was multiple, lengthy bj’s from csw’s who I later found out were HIV+ (not on meds) and one had oral ulcers/problems in her mouth, and very poor oral hygiene.  Plus, I had some inflammation on my penis at the time from a fungal infection.  So, due to the extenuating factors (and possible exposure to blood, etc.), I believe my risk has gone from zero to at least some risk.



Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: When the experts on this community comment....
« Reply #33 on: June 10, 2010, 06:19:12 AM »
Please keep all your thoughts questions and comments in your original thread. This helps us follow your story and give you the most accurate advice.

If you cannot find your original thread, please click the red link I have posted above. Alternatively you can use the "Show own posts" link which appears in the uppermost left hand column on any forum page.

Your questions will not be answered unless you return to your original thread

Please take the time to read our Welcome Thread and familiarise yourself with the posting guidelines.

MtD

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #34 on: June 10, 2010, 08:01:23 AM »
Vern, I have merged your threads here. As you have been told before there is a rule about this and all of your entries are supposed to go into only this same thread.

As for your further comments and concerns about receiving oral, we're really not interested in the sources you are quoting. Of course anytime you have sex other than with your own hand there maybe a theoretical risk. But more than 25 years in the epidemic has yet to turn up a confirmed case of a man getting infected through receiving oral. You can worry all you like if you want to but we're not going to participate.

If you continue to return about that non-risk issue you need to know you are on the verge of getting a Time Out from the site. Consider yourself warned. 
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: Stiff...?!
« Reply #35 on: June 10, 2010, 08:21:59 AM »
Vern,

So you're still doing your illogical stand-up comedy routine? Goodness.

If you cannot bring yourself to believe us when we tell you that getting a blowjob isn't a risk, then go test, collect your negative result, and get on with your life. It's as simple as that.

Oh, and yes, the risk assessments we give here are always with the assumption that the other person involved is hiv positive.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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