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Author Topic: Should I be concerned for my family member?  (Read 1551 times)

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Offline PRCR625

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  • Posts: 20
Should I be concerned for my family member?
« on: September 22, 2008, 08:15:44 PM »
Dear all,

I wrote in last week for the first time and received great advice. My husband was diagnosed HIV positive in June 2008. As if we didn't have enough to worry about here is another situation for which I need advice.

My 11 year old nephew was over on the Sunday after we received the bad news. He used my husband's dry razor to trim his sideburns. I walked in on him using it and immediately took it away. I checked both sides of his head and he did not cut himself or break any skin. He was a little red from the dry blade. I am now deathly afraid something could have been transmitted. We have not  
disclosed my husband's condition to anyone and we like to keep it confidential unless you feel this child is in danger. I wrote to my husband's doctor about this situation and received this response: "As long as no blood was drawn I think he should be fine and I wouldn't worry."

Please let me  know your thoughts.

Thank you!!


Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Should I be concerned for my family member?
« Reply #1 on: September 22, 2008, 08:34:31 PM »
PR,

I agree with the doctor. You're worrying unnecessarily.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline PRCR625

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  • Posts: 20
Re: Should I be concerned for my family member?
« Reply #2 on: September 22, 2008, 08:37:37 PM »
Thank you Ann!!!

Offline PRCR625

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Should I be concerned for my family member?
« Reply #3 on: March 24, 2009, 11:51:16 PM »
Hello to Ann and all,

It has been sometime since I wrote last. An update : I have continued to test - after 7 months from exposure. My husband, who is +, has been undetectable since beginning Atripla in July. We are very happy about this.

I am piggybacking off this old email because I am still concerned for my nephew. I try to think logically but my thoughts run away with me. I would never forgive myself if he were in danger. My husband and I have discussed this many times, we have great communication and are managing this situation very well. He tries to convince me I am nuts and that we need to focus on the problems at hand, not situations where transmission was unlikely. My husband wants his status undisclosed and I totally respect that. He does not want to hurt anyone unnecessarily.

I suggested we tell just my sister in hopes she could have my nephew tested but my husband refuses. He said it is so unlikely anything transmitted that I would be doing more harm than good.

Can someone set me straight here? As Ann said, am I really worrying for no reason?

Since we have shared this news with no one, I can only talk to members on this board. I really welcome your opinions and need your support.

Thank you so much.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Should I be concerned for my family member?
« Reply #4 on: March 25, 2009, 06:18:17 AM »
PR,

Yes, you are worrying unnecessarily. Hiv just doesn't remain intact and able to infect when it's outside the closed environment of the human body. That's why it's primarily transmitted through unprotected intercourse, where the hiv goes directly from the inside of one body to the inside of another body, without ever being in the outside environment.

If you want to protect your nephew's hiv status, the best thing you could do for him is to make sure he knows the score when it comes to condom usage - and he's quickly getting to the age where he needs to know. In the meantime, stop worrying about this razor incident.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline PRCR625

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Should I be concerned for my family member?
« Reply #5 on: March 25, 2009, 10:50:39 PM »
Ann,

Once again, thank you for getting me back on track. You are so knowledgeable and comforting at the same time. God Bless you.

Just wondering, are you an official moderator on these boards or a member? I am trying to figure out who is who... Ann, Andy, Rapid Rod. etc.

Can you point me to the section on this website which discusses HIV outside the host? I think this is a topic in which I need to increase my knowledge.

And one last question, should I continue to test monthly or am I considered "out of the woods?" Please keep in mind, we have not had intercourse since diagnosis, :(. But I can't complain. My husband is here, healthy and I love him more than ever for choosing to continue our life together.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Should I be concerned for my family member?
« Reply #6 on: March 26, 2009, 06:17:43 AM »
PRC,

If you want to know the membership status of any forum member, look at what's written directly below the username on the left next to their posts. You can also read the About Us page for more information.

There is no section that specifically discusses hiv outside its host - because there's no point. Hiv does not remain viable outside the host. It would be like discussing a piece of lint. If you're worried about day to day contact with your husband, all you need to do is observe normal good hygiene, just as you would with anyone.

You only needed to test out to three months past your last incident of unprotected intercourse with your husband. You do not need further testing - you ARE hiv negative. When you resume having intercourse, as long as you're using condom for intercourse, you will remain hiv negative. You would be wise to test yearly (only if you're sexually active again) just for peace of mind. You don't need to test if you're not having intercourse.

And something further you should know: There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. Condoms have been proven to prevent hiv infection. Read through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use them with confidence.

Ann

PS - Are you aware that you are permitted to post in our Someone I Care About Has HIV forum?
« Last Edit: March 26, 2009, 06:21:01 AM by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline PRCR625

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Should I be concerned for my family member?
« Reply #7 on: March 26, 2009, 11:13:27 PM »
Ann,

I can't express my thanks to you. It is
an amazing comfort to have someone
to turn to for answers. Even though we are
seeing a terrific team of doctors, the
social workers provided through the hospital
are not always available and have never
given me FACTS like I get from you and your
team. I hope before you go to bed each
night you should know how APPRECIATED
you are and the wonderful, positive differences
you make in other peoples lives. Thank you.

I will be more aware of where I am posting.
I will be back soon as my husband and I
are starting research for sperm washing.
Hopefully I can share my experience and
gather info and support from others.

CR

 


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