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Author Topic: Irishman Wants Job  (Read 1754 times)

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Offline RapidRod

  • Member
  • Posts: 15,288
Irishman Wants Job
« on: November 29, 2006, 06:01:57 AM »
An Irishman wants a job, but the foreman won't hire him until he passes
a little maths test.
Here is your first question, the foreman said. "Without using numbers,
represent the number 9."
"Without numbers?" The Irishman says, "Dat is easy." And proceeds to
draw three trees.

"What's this?" the boss asks?
"Ave you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine," says the

"Fair enough," says the boss. "Here's your second question. Use the
same rules, but this time the number is 99."
The Irishman stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture
that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree. "Ere you go."

The boss scratches his head and says, "How on earth do you get that to
represent 99?"
"Each of da trees is dirty now. So, it's dirty tree, and dirty tree, and
dirty tree. Dat is 99."
The boss is getting worried that he's going to actually have to hire
this Irishman, so he says, "All right, last question. Same rules again,
but represent the number 100."
The Irishman stares into space some more, then he picks up the
picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, "Ere
you go One hundred."

The boss looks at the attempt. "You must be nuts if you think that
represents a hundred!"
The Irishman leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each
tree and says, "A little dog come along and craps by each tree. So now you
got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd,
which makes one hundred."

Offline CaptCarl

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  • Posts: 1,114
  • Located in the Palinsville subdivision, JesusLand
Re: Irishman Wants Job
« Reply #1 on: November 29, 2006, 09:16:51 AM »
   Thanks for the early morning laugh! A joke every morning is the BEST way to start the day
The only thing I can do straight is shoot..

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,140
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Irishman Wants Job
« Reply #2 on: November 29, 2006, 09:57:34 AM »
Two Oirishmen were driving around, looking for work. When they passed a sign saying "Tree Fellers wanted", Mick turned to Paddy and said:

"What a shame there's only two of us!"

Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline allopathicholistic

  • Member
  • Posts: 3,258
Re: Irishman Wants Job
« Reply #3 on: November 29, 2006, 10:06:55 AM »
 :D I wanna hear these "live", with the accent an everything  :D

Offline Just John

  • Member
  • Posts: 267
Re: Irishman Wants Job
« Reply #4 on: December 01, 2006, 05:09:45 PM »
Do you Guys realise how racist these jokes are?? ---- NO? :o

Oh well;

Paddy and Murphy were on a camping holiday in Florida when they spoted a guy shouting for help and struggling to escape from an alligators jaws.

Murphy turned to Paddy and said "Oh Bejeysus Paddy what should we do"??

Paddy said "let him struggle, serves the flash yankee bastard right for buying a Lacoste sleeping bag in the first place"!! ;D
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.


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